Chapter 5: Weekend Pass To London
Kommandant Klink was walking around the compound looking for Maria. He spotted her outside of barrack two exercising. "Maria go for a walk with me."
"I would love to Kommandant but I am a bit busy right…"
"Now! This is not a request."
"Yes sir." The guys just stared in disbelief.
When they got out of earshot of any prisoners or guards, Klink began "You are going to accompany me to a party tonight. Be ready at 5. You are to get close to a certain captain and acquire some information concerning some troop movements. Make sure you keep this a secret. If you don't go you will spend 30 days in the cooler. See you then"
"But…All right." She said as Klink walked away not giving her time to argue.
"Hay what's the special occasion?" Carter asked as Maria walked out of her room wearing the blue dress she wore the night she danced with Hogan.
"Klink was invited to a party and he needs to bring a date so I got volunteered."
"You know luv, that according to the Geneva Convention, I don't think he can make you go." Commented Newkirk
"If nothing else though it gives me a chance to legally get out of camp."
"Where's the party at and who is going to be there?" Hogan asked
"Well dad, I don't know, but I promise to be a perfect angel and I will do what you told me to do if anyone gets fresh with me." Hogan just stared. He wasn't in a laughing mood. "He just told me to be ready or spend thirty days in the cooler."
"Be careful, I don't like this plan at all. Newkirk I want you to hitch a ride and keep an eye on things."
"Colonel, I can take care of myself. I don't need a babysitter."
"I want him there just in case. I will feel better knowing you have backup."
"I have the fearless Kommandant Klink with me. What more do I need." Everyone laughed.
"Be careful and come back to me, uh I mean us." Hogan started to blush and went into the tunnels before anyone could tease him.
At the party, Klink introduced Maria as Sarah Bowman, his niece. It was a good thing, because out of all the people that were at the party; the lieutenant she had met a while ago started walking toward her.
"Ah Frau Bowman isn't it?" Asked the lieutenant.
"Guten aben lieutenant."
"Would you care to dance, that is if it is all right with your uncle?"
Klink didn't want her to; there was a job to do. If she didn't he might not leave here alone. "Yes that will be fine."
As they were dancing, Maria noticed Klink trying to get her attention. He pointed to a captain that was over by the punch table talking with some other officers. "Excuse me Lieutenant, but who is that captain over there?"
"That is Captain Hess, my superior. Would you like me to introduce you?"
Could it be this easy "If it wouldn't be to much trouble"
"Captain Hess I would like to introduce you to a friend of mine Frau Sarah Bowman. She is the niece of Colonel Klink, Kommandant of Stalag 13"
"Nice to meet you." The captain took Maria's hand and kissed it. "I take it that you are married?"
"My husband is stationed at the Russian front." Maria looked sad
"That is such a shame. If you don't mind, I will keep you company tonight."
Maria looked to Klink and nodded "Just letting uncle Wilhelm know that he can stop worrying about me and that I am ingood hands.
They had mostly small talk all night. When another captain came up to talk with Captain Hess, Maria started to excuse herself, "I shall go Captain and let you men talk war."
"Nonsense. Stay and hear how we are going crush the allied swine!"
"I would love to hear how the swine will pay for taking my Michael away from me."
The men talked about how they were going to ambush the Allies in the town of Hannover. When she had gained all the information, she gave a slight nod to Klink letting him know that she had it.
"Excuse me gentleman, I am afraid it is getting late and I have a Stalag to run." Klink interrupted.
"It was nice to meet you Sarah. I shall kill one of those swine just for you."
Why you little so and so "I would appreciate it Captain. Guten aben."
On the way back to camp, Maria filled Klink in on the details of the ambush. "You will keep this between us. You will not inform Hogan."
"But Kommandant they…"
"I said no and that's an order. I better not here of any interference because you told Hogan. If you do, all of barrack two will be punished. Is that understood?"
Maria hung her head down "Yes sir."
STALAG 13
"So what went on?" Hogan asked as soon as she walked in the door
"Nothing, just a bunch of officers trying to impress each other and Klink trying to suck up to some Generals. Did you really expect Klink to take me if they were going to be talking about sensitive information?"
" I guess not. Thanks for keeping an eye out"
About a week later, Maria was out limping around. Now to ask Klink about that pass. This ought to be fun. Maria knocks on Klink's door. "Yes come in."
"Kommandant I need to speak with you." Maria went over to the pitcher of Hitler and put her hand over the microphone.
"I take it you don't want any listening ears."
"Yes and I don't want to answer any questions about this request. I know this seems odd, but I need to go to London for a few days. I will be back. I promise. If I don't come back it is because I am dead."
"Why on earth would I let you go to London?"
"The end of the war is getting close. I have someone in London that I need to make contact with. It is important. I can't tell you specifically what it is about, but I promise that I will eventually tell you my secret."
"You still haven't convinced me yet to let you go."
"If you don't I will escape and stop by the Shultz's house and get Robert and stay in London. Your perfect no escape record will be ruined. They might get you an express ticket to someplace cold and unpleasant. If I don't come back and I'm not dead you can take it out on the rest of the prisoners. I am going with or without your permission."
"You don't leave me much of a choice. Granted. But I promise you that if anyone finds out and I get in trouble, Colonel Hogan will pay dearly."
"Thanks." Maria left and went down into the tunnels to make the arrangements in London for when she got there.
That evening after roll call, when Klink dismissed the prisoners, Maria picked up a snowball and threw it. It hit Klink on the back of the head. "Who threw that? Maria get in my office" Maria, followed by Hogan went into Klink's office. "What was the meaning of that?"
"Sorry sir she was aiming at me and missed. It wont happen again." Hogan answered wondering why she had really thrown it at Klink .
"Hogan you were not standing in my direction."
"She is a really bad shot."
"Sorry Colonel but it won't work. Three days in solitary. Maybe you will think more before you do such a thing like that again."
Before Hogan could protest Maria agreed, "Yes sir. Sorry sir. Shultz take me to the cooler."
"What just happened?" Hogan asked dumbfound.
Klink smiled inwardly at watching Hogans reaction. /."She is a person who understands when she has done wrong and accepts the consequences. You are dismissed Colonel" She better be back in time.
LONDON
Maria checked out the intelligence building and snuck in and placed her file in the drawer that contained the dossiers on all of those that are working undercover.
Later that day Maria arrived at the gates of British Intelligence. A guard stopped her. "Maria Crockett to see General Hamman." The guard checked his list.
"Yes Ma'am. You are expected."
Maria walked in and stopped at the front desk. "Maria Crockett to see General Hamman."
The secretary got on the phone and notified General Hamman that Maria was there. "You may go in."
Maria entered the room and came to attention in front of General Hamman. "General Maria Crockett checking in as ordered sir."
"A female general?"
"Yes sir. General Harper originally assigned me to work undercover at Stalag 13. Before the assignment I was a Colonel. But they needed someone of a higher rank than Colonel Hogan. He figured that Colonel Hogan would reveal more information to a female than a male. You should find the specifics of my assignment in my file sir."
"I would remember coming across a female General, but I will look. Well what do you know, here it is. You are the secretary at Stalag 13."
"No sir. That was the original plan, but it got altered when the Gestapo captured me before I could make it there. I am currently stationed there as a prisoner though."
"If you are a prisoner there, how did you get here?"
"Bribed a guard and got in touch with Papa Bear. I have had Colonel Hogan under surveillance since I arrived. So far I do not find anything to support the accusations brought against him. Here is my report."
Hamman looked through the file. "This is all so new and puzzling to me. I am still having a hard time believing this. Yet here is your file, which has everything in it. The information you have gathered here in your report seems sufficient to drop all charges against Colonel Hogan. We will find a new assignment for you."
"Sir if I don't return back to camp, the prisoners will pay the price for my escape. I am sure you are familiar with Papa Bears operation. If I don't return, I can put it in jeopardy."
"I can't imagine you wanting to return to a POW camp."
"I don't want to, I have to."
"Very well you may return, but maintain cover."
"Yes sir. Sir, I was wondering if I might be able to take back with me a uniform and papers from you stating the authenticity of the assignment. I have a feeling that I might need it."
"Yes, but you are only to break cover with my approval. I will have everything arranged. Be back here in an hour."
"Thank you sir." Maria saluted and went to the canteen to get something to eat Wow real food. I can't wait for this war to be over.
Maria was back at Stalag 13 by morning roll call the next day. She hid the uniform and paperwork in the wall down one of the abandoned tunnels. When Shultz came to get her out of the cooler, she was waiting on him.
"So Maria are you going to be involved in anymore snowball fights?" Klink asked as she took here place in formation.
"Not ones involving you sir."
"You're dismissed."
Hogan faced Maria with his arms crossed. "Your room now."
"Yes Colonel."
"I want to know where you were. I went into the cooler to visit you and you were not there."
"Itooka trip. I didn't like being cooped up in there. Its boring."
"Then you shouldn't throw snowballs at the kommandant!"
"I know that now. If that is all Colonel, I'm tired."
Listening in his office, Klink was laughing at how flustered Hogan was getting at not getting any answers.. The laugh was cut short when the phone rang. "Hello, Kommandant Klink Stalag 13 Heil Hitler…Oh hi General Burkhaulter. Nice…Yes sir I am shutting up…What…Yes sir we have some room, but…yes sir. When… Yes sir new prisoners arriving next week. Good bye Heil Hitler."
Where am I going to put them all? "Shultz bring Colonel Hogan here." I will delegate and make it Hogan's problem.
"You wanted to see me sir?"
"Colonel, we are going to be getting in a large number of new prisoners next week. The Allies are pushing closer and they are evacuating the POW camps that are in their way. There will be ten trucks coming in tomorrow. It is your responsibility to figure out where to house them."
"Sir do you realize how many men that is? Those men will double the size of the camp."
"Yes I know Hogan. If you don't find a place to put them, then I guess they will have to sleep in the cooler or outside."
"You can't do that sir. According to…"
"Hogan you quote that convention to me one more time and I will make you sleep in the cooler until the war is over!"
"Yes sir. Is that all?"
"Yes you are dismissed."
Hogan walked into barrack two and motioned for everyone to gather around. "Men we are going to receive a lot of new prisoners next week. They are evacuating some POW camps and they are sending some of them here. Ten truck loads to be exact." Hogan paused while the grumbling to die down. " I want a meeting with all barrack leaders in the Rec Hall in ten minutes. We have to figure out what to do with them all."
Maria and the rest of Hogan's men showed up to the meeting, along with the barrack leaders. Hogan explained the problem to them. "The only answer I can come up with is consolidation and when possibly put people on the floors and two to a bunk."
"Colonel," Maria raised her hand. "There is no since in me keeping a private room with this shortage. I am willing to share the room."
"Thanks Maria, but are you sure?"
"Yes sir."
While Hogan and his men were working out the new barrack arrangement, a staff car pulled up. "Funny, Klink didn't tell me about any guests. Lets go see who it is." Hogan and everyone else gathered in Maria's room to listen in.
"Kommandant Klink, I am General Berlmeyer. I have top-secret documents that must make it to Berlin. I am in need of some place safe to stay for tonight and was wondering if you can help me?"
What are we a resort? "Certainly Herr General. You may stay in the guest quarters. Shultz, please show General Berlmeyer to the guest quarters."
"Kinch get on the radio and check it out."
A little while later Kinch comes up. "Hay Colonel get a load of this. He is suppose to be caring blue prints for a new rocket."
"We need to find out where he keeps the blueprints and make a switch."
Everyone kept their eyes open for the documents. Newkirk even "accidentally" bumped into him to see if he had them on him. Nothing. "Sorry gov'ner, they must be in his room. How are we going to get in there to search?" Newkirk asked.
"We need a big diversion. One that will get his attention as well as all the guards. Any one have any suggestions?"
"I have an idea Colonel." Maria volunteered. "And since it is so nice out, it will make the plan even easier."
"What do you have in mind?" Hogan asked, as he got comfortable waiting to hear the plan.
"It's a surprise. LeBeau, can I barrow one of your T-Shirts?"
"I guess, why?"
"You'll see." Maria took the T-Shirt and went down in the tunnel to find an old pair of pants. After she found what she was looking for, she barrowed Newkirk's sowing kit and started modifying the clothes. A short time later she emerged from the tunnel. All the men stopped what they were doing and stared. She made a pair of "Daisy Duke shorts" and lowered the neckline of the skintight shirt.
Hogan was the first to speak. "Why did you have to choose that? How are we supposed to work when we are distracted also?"
Everyone started laughing. "Sir, I don't think I am up to the job, so I believe I will stay out 'ere." Newkirk stated as he walked up to Maria. "Will you marry me?"
"Sorry Newkirk you are working inside. There might be a lock that needs picked." Hogan answered.
"I really like you Newkirk, but I don't think so."
"Bien, now you can marry me." LeBeau stated as he took her hand
"Sorry fellas no marriage proposals at this time. I have a job to do." Maria walked into her room and got her blanket. Maria walks up to Carter and puts her arm around him and whispers in his ear. "Would you be a doll and get Shultz for me? Please."
Carter nodded with his mouth open and went to find Shultz. "I'm glad you are on our side. If you worked for the Gestapo, Germany would have won the war already." Hogan stated shaking his head.
"What makes you think so?" Asked Kinch curious as to Hogan came up with that conclusion.
"All the men would surrender just so they could be interrogated by her and no one left to fight." Hogan responded.
Carter returned with Shultz. "Yes what do… Maria! What are you wearing? You can't be running around here looking like that."
"Oh Shultzie, I need a big favor from you." Maria put her arms around Shultz's neck and gave him the pouty eyes. " I need you to get General Berlmeyer to come to the door and for him to be able to see the center of the compound." She leans closer to him "Please?" Shultz got a pleasant look on his face and nodded. "Run along then Sweetie." Shultz left and Maria got ready to go out into the compound.
"You are a dangerous woman. Newkirk ready to go?"
"What I don't sacrifice for freedom."
When Maria saw Berlmeyer at the door, Maria stepped out and walked to the center of the compound. She bent over giving Berlmeyer a nice view and placed the blanket on the ground and laid down on it. Berlmeyer along with the rest of the men in camp gathered around her. "If you insist on blocking my sun, I am going to go back inside." Maria said with a smile. In unison all the men took a step back.
"Now Newkirk!" Hogan motioned when all attention was on Maria. After searching for a while, Newkirk emerged and joined the group.
Klink heard the commotion outside and saw the crowd. He immediately went outside and to the center of the crowd. Klink stood so his shadow was cast on Maria. "I warned you that if you blocked my sun, I was going in."
"That might be wise. I should have you thrown in the cooler for not wearing proper clothing." Klink said as he almost lost his temper.
"Oh hi Kommandant. I am just working on my tan. No harm. Besides I thought you wouldn't mind since it would be easier to watch all the prisoners when they are in one spot."
"You are to go inside and put your regular clothes on now!" All the prisoners and guards grumbled at the order. "All of get back to what you were doing."
"You heard the Kommandant, scat." Hogan said as he motioned for everyone to leave. Maria grabbed her blanket and went inside with the rest of the men andchanged back into here regular clothes. Newkirk handed the blueprints to Hogan. "We have to get this to London fast. Kinch get on the radio and tell them we have the blue prints and what are the orders."
Kinch came up from the tunnels a little while later, "Colonel, London said they want him to disappear and they are going to get the plans to Max and he will get them to London."
The men waited for Berlmeyer to leave. When he did, Hogan, Maria and his men waited on the road for him. Carter planted explosives on the road "Maria be ready just in case and yes it needs to be a kill shot." Hogan stated. "Here he comes ready…ready…now!" Carter pushed down on the plunger and there was a beautiful explosion. "Good job, now back to camp."
After they got back to camp, Shultz came in. "Colonel Hogan, Kommandant Klink would like to speak with you."
"Sure Shultz."
KOMMANDANTUR
"You wanted something sir?" Hogan asked standing casually in front of his desk.
"I was just notified that the new prisoners will be here tomorrow. Please have everything ready."
"Yes sir. Anything else?"
"No you are dismissed."