Chapter Four: Tragedy Strikes
As we turned onto my street, I noticed the flashing lights. I didn't pay attention though, because there were always police cars at our neighbor's house. When I heard Marco gasp, I actually looked up, and what I saw shocked me.
Half of my house was gone, and it was still bright with flames. I jumped out of the car and, thinking of only my mom, I ran towards the house, as if I was going to save her. I felt Marco grab onto me and hold me back.
"Come on," he whispered in my ear. "Stay where it's safe." He led me backwards over to the car and held me in his arms. I cried as he watched the firemen finally extinguish the fire and run in for my mom. The fire had been so out of control when they arrived that no one was allowed inside.
"Please let her be alright," I whispered to Marco. He pulled me closer to him and I buried my head in his chest. I anxiously watched the front door, waiting for her mom to walk out, coughing, but okay. My hopes were shattered when the men rolled a stretcher out, with the body covered by a sheet. "No!" I screamed, ripping myself away from Marco. I ran to my mother's body, but instantly fell back, tormented by the smell of burnt flesh. I threw up all over the lawn and took the hand that offered to help me up.
Marco held me close as I cried for hours. My mother was taken away and I never even looked at her. I didn't wantthat to be the last time I saw her, and have that be the way I remember her. After I don't even know how long, I dragged Marco into my now destroyed home.
What I saw amazed me. The only room left untouched was my bedroom. The walls were burnt down around it, and chunks of the ceiling/roof were all over the floor. But my bed, and all of my belongings, including my clothes, were all there.
As I surveyed the damage done to the rest of the house, I nervously snapped the rubber band on my wrist. It was a stupid habit, I knew that, but I couldn't help it. I had grown accustomed to the stinging sensation I got from it. My tears never stopped the entire time, but I pretended that I was fine. After about an hour or so of just looking at the house and crying, Marco helped me pack up everything I owned.
I didn't have much except for pictures of my family which consisted of my mom, my dad, and me, and other pictures of me and Marco together. Of course I also had clothes and CDs, but not very many of either. I always made do with what I had; mixing and matching different pieces of clothing so I appeared to have millions of outfits.
After a long phone call with Marco's parents, they decided to let me stay at their house, but only until Sunday night, which gave me just three days to find somewhere permanent to live. My dad was still away at war, so I couldn't live with him, and I most certainly could not live by myself. I had no relatives that lived in Canada, and I wasn't going to leave the country, so that was out of the question as well. That might just work out, I thought to myself when I remembered that I was going to talk to Spike the next day after school. Maybe I could live with her. Of course, all of this wondering where I would live did not push the fact out of my mind that my mother had just died. It simply allowed me to stop thinking about it for awhile. Marco's parents drove over to my house, we piled all of my stuff into his car and theirs, and then I drove back to Marco's house with him. I knew the next few days would be fun but awkward at the same time.
I am so lucky to have a friend like Marco. He offered to let me sleep in his bed and he slept on the couch. I wanted him to sleep in there with me, but of course, his parents didn't know he was gay, so sleeping with a girl before marriage was out of the question.
At breakfast, Marco's dad was reading the newspaper and I noticed that a picture of what used to be my house was on the front page. When I went to school, practically everyone pointed and whispered about me as I walked by them. The only people who actually told me that they were sorry about my mom were Emma, Jay, and Craig. They were the only people, besides Marco of course, that didn't mind being seen speaking to me in public.
After school, I silently walked to Emma's house. I didn't tell Marco where I was going because he was against me telling people that I was pregnant. We'd both tell a few people, but he said he wasn't ready for his parents to know. I didn't blame him at all because I wasn't going to tell my mom and now I didn't have to. My heart sank as I thought about this. At this point I realized that I was already at Emma's house and I knocked on the door. Spike opened it and ushered me in. We sat at the kitchen table once again and she placed a cup of tea in front of me.
"I'm very sorry about your mom," she said, finally breaking the silence. I gave her a weak smile. "Is your dad coming home for the visitation?" she asked me. Right then and there I realized that I had not even called my dad.
"I forgot to call him!" I blurted out and began to cry. "He probably can't come anyway. He never comes home." I snapped my rubber band once, but luckily, Spike didn't even notice.
"I'm sorry Ellie. I didn't mean to upset you. Do you want to talk about the baby?" she asked me.
"Yeah, I do," I told her. "I'm not sure what I'm going to do about all of this," I said, sighing and wiping the tears from my eyes.
"I know how hard it is," she said. "Do you know if you are going to keep it, or something else?" she asked. I knew she didn't want to talk about abortion. "And does the father know?"
"I'm not going to kill it, if that's what you're asking." I suddenly fell silent but then decided to keep talking. "And yes, the father knows, but…" I trailed off. I couldn't tell her that Marco was the father, and especially that he was gay. I was the only person who knew his secret. "He's going to help me, but we're not going to tell his parents," I said, skirting around the issue.
"Ellie, do you have any place to live?" Spike asked suddenly.
"Well…" This was my chance to ask her. "Being my best friend, Marco asked his parents if I could say with them for awhile, but they're only letting me stay until Sunday night," I explained. "I was sort of wondering if I could live with you, since you know all about having a baby young and everything," I blurted out, looking at the floor.
"Oh Ellie…" Spike whispered. "I'm sorry, but…" I didn't let her finish the sentence.
"No, I'm sorry. It was stupid of me to just think that you'd let me move in here. I don't even believe that I actually asked you. I'm such an idiot," I said, getting up to leave.
"Don't leave. No, I can't have you live here, but the only reason is that I'm pregnant too. Snake and I are having our first baby together, and there just wouldn't be anywhere for you to sleep. If I had another room, I would let you stay. I just don't think I'd be able to deal with two teenagers and two babies at the same time," she explained.
"Oh. Well, it's nice to know that you would have let me stay if there was room. I just almost feel like no one wants me. Like maybe my mom's gone so she wouldn't have to be near me, and my dad just never comes home. The only person in the world who sees me is Marco." Why was I talking to her like she was a therapist or something?
"Ellie don't say that. What happened to your mom was an accident, and I know she loved you very much. She still loves you; she's just looking after you from somewhere else."
"Thanks for talking with me, but I should go now. I really have to try and find a place to live. I don't have very long," I said. Spike stood up with me and gave me a hug. I felt like I did when I used to hug my mother. Tears stung my eyes.
"Just know that I will be here to help you in anyway that I can. You're welcome over for dinner whenever you want. Just call me if you have any questions," Spike told me.
"I will." I turned to leave but walked straight into Emma.
"Hey Ellie, what are you doing here?" she asked me, rubbing her head.
"Sorry about that. I was just leaving though." I went to move past her but she moved too, blocking my way.
"Actually, I'm glad that you're here. I wanted to talk to you about something," she said to me.
"Um, okay…" I gave Spike a weird look and she shrugged her shoulders and then smiled.
"Do you want to go up to my room so we can have privacy?" she asked me.
"Sure." I followed Emma upstairs. We went into her room and she had me sit on her bed. Her room was so much different than mine. The bed was made, the room was clean, and there were posters of animals and environmental issues plastered all over the walls. I stopped looking around the room when I noticed that Emma was staring at me. Almost as if she was studying me. "What did you want to talk about?" I asked.
"Well…" as soon as she started to talk, she wouldn't look at me.
"Just tell me," I said. "It is okay to look at me when you talk to me. I'm not going to bite you or anything." Emma let out some nervous laughter and started talking again.
"I don't want you to feel like I'm spying on you or anything, but I was just wondering something. The other day when I heard you throwing up in the bathroom, you weren't sick were you? I mean, you were throwing up, you've been coming over to talk to my mom…Ellie, are you pregnant?" she asked me. My mouth fell open and my hands instantly flew to my stomach. Was it that easy to tell? Now she had me wondering how many people had figured it out already.
"Yeah…I am." I sighed. It was almost good getting it out. Even though Emma wasn't my friend since I don't really know her that well, I felt comfortable telling her. I knew Marco would be mad, but I was almost starting not to care. He did leave me for guys.
"I was also wondering where you were going to live now that…" she didn't finish the sentence. I knew she didn't want to bring up the fact that my mom had died. "I just…haven't ever seen your dad…"
"My dad's in the army," I told her. "He's never around and so I can't live with him."
"I'm sorry," she said.
"Don't be. I feel stupid though because I just asked your mom if I could live here. But, she said no because she's having a baby too and there's no room," I explained. I really couldn't believe that I was telling her all of this.
"Tell me about it. I have to move my room down to the basement for the baby. Anyways, I was thinking…"
"Should I be scared by what you're going to say?" I asked.
"Well, I have this idea. You know my friend Sean?" she asked me. "My ex-boyfriend, I should say."
"Yeah, what about him?" I asked, interested. How was this going to help me?
"Well, he lives by himself in an apartment. There are two bedrooms and…" she trailed off.
"You think I should move in with him?" I asked skeptically. "But I barely even know him," I pointed out. "Actually, I've never even talked to him."
"Which is why I think I should talk to him about it, and then you can talk with him. I know he's really lonely since his brother, Tracker, moved out. I really think he'd like the company."
"I'm not so sure about this…" I started to say.
"Well, where else do you have to live? Unless you stay at Marco's."
"I can't live there; his parents won't let me."
"Which is why you should really consider this," Emma said.
"I guess I'll think about it," I told her.
"That's great," she said. Then she stood up and hugged me. She actually hugged me. I stood up to go and Emma walked me to the door. "Call me later and let me know what you decide," she said, waving as I left.
I silently walked back to Marco's house, all of the recent events buzzing through my head. I think I just made a friend, I thought to myself. I smiled, but then the smile disappeared as I realized something. I still had to call my father.
A/N: I know that in this point on the show, Ellie would have been in 9th grade, but I'm going to have it so that Ellie's in 10th and Sean's in 9th because they are in different grades on the show. I also know that Tracker was still living with Sean at this time, but I changed it because it's my story!