Chapter Six: New, Yet Unimproved

A/N: To ilovedc: I made Ellie's mom die because I had certain plans about where I wanted Ellie to end up, and how I wanted her to meet certain people. It just helps tie everything together, including the title of the story. I also never liked her on the show and didn't want to have to deal with her as a character in my story.

"This is it," Sean said as I followed him into his apartment. It really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. When I didn't say anything, Sean spoke again. "Thought it wouldn't be this clean huh?" he asked me.

"Actually, no I didn't. I thought there would be soda cans and pizza boxes everywhere," I said truthfully.

"Well, here's one of my secrets: I can't stand my home being dirty or messy. Whenever Jay comes over, I just let him mess it up as much as he wants, but I always clean it as soon as he leaves. It's just how I am," he shrugged.

"I spent so much time cleaning up after my mom that I just never left anything dirty. I always had to make the house presentable enough for her, even if no one ever came over," I sighed and sat down on the arm of the chair next to me.

"So…do you think you could see yourself living here?" Sean asked me. I wasn't sure of what I was going to say. I didn't have anywhere else to go. I also didn't know him very well at all. I chose the former rather than the latter.

"I don't have anywhere else to go," I answered him.

"I'll show you around then. You're already sitting in the living room. That's the kitchen right there," he said, pointing over to the left. The kitchen was a suitable size. "And if you'll follow me, I'll show you the rest." I stood up and followed him. We went down a small hallway. "That's my bedroom," he said, pointing to a closed door on the right side. "And there's yours." My new bedroom was across the hall from Sean's. It was a little bit smaller than my room at home, but not by much. The room was completely bare. He spoke again, tearing me away from my thoughts. "That's the bathroom." It was next to his bedroom. "And that tiny room in there has a washer and dryer in it."

"It looks like a pretty nice place. I hope this doesn't offend you, but I'm surprised by how nice it actually is. Where do you get the money to pay for it all?" I asked, hoping the question didn't make him mad.

"I have my student welfare, but that mainly pays for food, clothes, and bills. I fix cars for rent money." And also sell stolen goods with Jay, he added, but kept that last part to himself.

"Do you want to go get my stuff with me? Most of it is at Marco's in his room, and my bed, dresser, and bookcase are in the basement. I don't know how we'll get that here…" I trailed off.

"I'll call up Mr. Armstrong. He has a big truck, and will probably be able to fit the stuff in it, as long as he brings it one at a time. I fixed the truck for him for free once, so he owes me," he explained.

"That would be great," I said. "I'll call Marco and let him know that we're coming for my stuff." I went into my new bedroom and closed the door. I sat down, my legs crossed, and dialed Marco's number from my cell phone. A few minutes later, I emerged from my room to find Sean waiting by the door. "It's just a short walk over to Marco's, and then he'll drive us back with all of my clothes and stuff."

"Mr. Armstrong will meet us there," he told me. "Let's go."

"Ellie, don't forget that I'm really close by and I'll always be here for you. If you need to talk or just can't sleep, I'm a phone call away. I'll rush right over if you need me," Marco said. We were standing in the middle of the sidewalk. All of my things were packed into his car. Sean was in the back seat, looking very cramped and uncomfortable. Mr. Armstrong had already taken my bed and dresser over to Sean's apartment, and was now leaving Marco's house with the bookshelf in the back of his truck.

"I'll be fine Marco, I promise," I told him. He put his hand onto my stomach and rubbed it.

"Make sure you eat right and still exercise…"

"Marco, I told you that I'll be fine. You can come over whenever you want; I already talked it over with Sean. I'll still see you everyday at school too." I smiled at how thoughtful he was being. I realized his hand was still resting on my stomach, and I shoved it away when I saw his mom coming through the front door.

"Mrs. Del Rossi: thank you so much for letting me stay," I said, reaching out to shake her hand. Instead, she kissed me on the cheek and pulled me towards her, hugging me.

"Ellie, you know you're welcome to eat dinner over whenever you want. You're like a daughter to us," she told me.

A daughter who is pregnant with your son's baby. I shivered at that thought. That would mean it was incest or something. It was true though, I was always over Marco's house, especially when my mom used to get drunk.

"Thank you. I'll make sure to take you up on that offer." We both laughed and Marco's mom waved to Sean inside the car. He waved back to her and she turned back to me.

"Goodbye dear," she said and turned to walk into the house.

"Bye!" I called after her. Marco walked around the car and opened the door for me before getting in on the driver's side. We made our way to my new home.

Everyone had left a few hours ago. I was sitting on my bed, staring at the way Mr. Armstrong had arranged my room. I didn't like it very much. I jumped off of the bed and began moving around furniture to make it more like my old room.

"You want some help?" Sean asked from the doorway. I nearly jumped five feet; he scared me so much. "Sorry," he said, realizing that he had startled me.

"Sure, why not," I answered him. Sean helped me move my bed to a different wall, put my dresser across the room from the bed, and place my bookshelf to the right of the bed. The door was to the left. "I think I've got it from here," I said. "Thanks."

"No problem," Sean said, and left to watch some television. I looked around at the room. It was a little better. At least the set up was. I looked down at the plain wood floor and then around at the bare white walls that surrounded me.

After three hours, I had all of my clothes in the closet, all the books on the shelves, and all of my CD's arranged on either side of my small stereo. There were posters and photos all over the walls. Most of the posters were people from my favorite bands and my favorite movie posters. The walls were covered. Right above the head of my bed, I had arranged a collage of photos.

Almost all of them were of Marco, or Marco and I together. There were a few from when I was a baby and then a little girl and my favorite picture was right in the center. It was taken five years ago, before we moved to Toronto and before my dad went to war. It was a photo of my parents and me, with me in the middle of them. We looked like the happiest people in the world. I knew who had taken the photo, but I didn't even want to think about it. I stuck up the last picture. It was a Polaroid of Sean, Marco, and I standing in this very room, right after we had arrived in Marco's car.

The books on my shelves were mostly by Amelia Atwater-Rhodes, who writes mainly about vampires. I also had the Cirque Du Freak series, which was also about vampires. My other books were all about fairies or some sort of magic. I love to read, but I never shared that with anyone besides Marco. I don't know why; I just never did. On the top of the bookshelf were a few framed photos of the person that I missed more than anyone. He was the reason we moved, and the reason why my dad eventually decided to go into the army again. I wiped a stray tear from my cheek and willed myself not to think about him. At least, not right now. I looked around the room and was finally satisfied.

Walking into the living room, I noticed that Sean was fast asleep on the couch. I instinctively began to cover him up with a blanket before remembering that he wasn't my mother. But I accidentally woke him up.

"You should go to bed," I suggested. Without saying anything, he nodded, stretched, and walked away into his room, shutting the door behind him. I was going to watch TV with him, but since he was going to bed, I figured that I should too. I brushed my teeth, went back to my room, stripped down to my underwear (I'm used to sleeping that way), and got under the blankets.

It felt good to be back in my own bed, but I wasn't in my real bedroom. I couldn't sleep. I lied awake for hours, rolling over and trying to get some sleep. It wasn't working. So I did what I normally would. I called Marco.

"Hello?" Marco answered on the third ring.

"I didn't wake you up did I?" I asked, concerned.

"Nope. I was just finishing my homework." I heard the familiar sound of Marco flopping onto his bed. We used to talk on the phone while lying in our beds, pretending that we were right next to each other. I guess the habit stuck, even after he told me that we couldn't be together. "What's wrong?" he asked, slicing through my thoughts.

"I can't sleep. I've just been lying here, thinking about my mom, but mostly thinking about him…" I trailed off.

"Thinking about Matt? Good or bad thoughts?" he asked me.

"Really bad," I answered hesitantly. "Well, more like sad."

"Ellie, what happened to him was not your fault. You have to understand that," he said firmly.

"But I should have…" Marco interrupted me before I could say any more.

"I don't want to hear it El. We've talked about this. You can't blame yourself. You should really get some sleep," he told me.

"Will you stay on the phone with me until I fall asleep?" I asked him sheepishly.

"I'll do anything for you." He fell silent and all I could hear was his breathing. I fell right asleep, knowing that Marco was so close by.

A/N: Sorry if it seemed rushed that Ellie moved in with Sean right after seeing his place; I just needed to get it out of the way. Amelia Atwater-Rhodes is my favorite author…that's why I put her in there. The books that I read are the books I made Ellie read. I also don't know what kind of car Mr. Armstrong drives, but I needed someone to have a truck, and he popped into my head.