Pizza Kills 11:
Willy and I got up and dressed. He went to his room and came back. It was hot in Houston and I insisted he wear shorts. He had cute knees. When he wore normal clothes he looked like anyone else…except for the hair…that was just him. I rented a car since I had my Texas license still. We drove to the place I had bought my mom. It was nice. I had bought it after she had called me out of the blue. How she got my number I still don't know.
We pulled into the drive and parked. The minute I stepped out I smelled it. Texas bbq. There's nothing like it. We went around to he backyard me calling her name. She stood there turning meat and smiled up at me. I gave her a kiss on the cheek and a half hug. My cousins were there and the picnic table was set.
I spent most of the morning talking to my mom while Willy was talking to my cousins and playing cards with them. They were interrogating him but he answered all their questions. It was noon and all the food was ready. We had macaroni and real cheese, dirty rice, two kinds of potato salad, and more bbq than you could shake a stick at. I loaded up a baked potato with brisket, cheese, bacon bits, sour cream, and chives. Willy wanted one after seeing mine. He ate like a starving man. My mom said she'd send me out some bbq.
"So, Willy?" said my mom.
He wiped his bbq sauced mouth, "Yes ma'am?"
"I see you like the food," she said smiling.
He had every food on his plate or around him. He left nothing untried.
"Yeah, it's great! He smiled. "I wish the…my workers knew how to make this."
"I'm sure Cheryl can make it for you," said my mom.
"Can you?" he asked me.
"Sure why not," I said.
Willy sipped on his cool aid. My mom waited until he was done drinking not wanting to choke him.
"Do you like my daughter?" she asked.
"Yes!" he said. "She's my best friend…next to Charlie but Charlie's a kid and she's grown!"
"I mean…do you like my daughter…like a girl," she said.
He looked like someone had turned the light on in his head.
"I tried that but she said no!" he said and glared at me.
"Eat your food before I slap you again," I said.
I wound up telling my mom everything. I caught it for hitting him when she said he obviously didn't understand that it was an insult to me. He sat next to me looking smug. I was tempted to pop him upside the head but I knew my mom would then hit me. She's no soft touch.
"So you like my baby?" she asked.
"Mom…don't make me disown you," I said.
"She's stubborn!" said Willy.
"And you're a big kid!" I said.
Everyone looked at us and laughed. We both blinked and looked at them.
"So when's the wedding?" asked my brother.
"That's not funny," I said.
"You know she's had her dress picked out since I can't remember," my mom said.
"Is it pretty?" asked Willy.
"She'll look like a queen," my mom said smiling at me.
Willy turned to me and made me choke on my strawberry cool aid.
"Will you marry me?" he asked enthusiastically.
I looked around thinking he was talking to someone else until he tapped me on the shoulder.
"Well will you?" he asked.
"Are you nuts?" I asked. "Don't answerer that I already know."
"I'm crazy about you!" he said smiling.
I think his teeth could light a ship to shore. Then I smiled.
"I would say yes…but you don't even have a ring," I said thinking it would shut him up.
He smiled and pulled out a ring box, "Willy Wonka is always prepared!"
The ring was an emerald cut amethyst with sapphires and garnets.
"Wow it's…colorful…just like you," I said.
He slipped it on and smiled, "I'm getting married!" he said.
Before I knew it I was talking to my mom about getting married on new years at the stroke of midnight. After that day it was all a blur. The next thing I knew I was standing in a wedding dress wondering how I got into this mess. I was marrying Willy Wonka. I had to be nuts.
I was soon walking down the isle minus my father. He had met Willy and it hadn't ended nicely. My brother stopped him from hitting Willy. He had called Willy a stupid sick cracker. I looked through my veil at Willy. He was as colorful as ever. We got married in my hometown church. Even his father was there. He also reminded me I had a dental check up.
When we exchanged rings you should've seen his face when he saw his. I had it made just in time for him. Willys ring was moonstone and Celtic. Former Scottish kings had worn it. We were married as the clock struck midnight. Our first kiss was magical. We even jumped the broom. We had the reception outside and there were fireworks. It was magic.
We rented a house on a lake. We were the only house around for miles. We both changed so we could relax. As he sat I looked at him. I knew what we had to do and so did he or he wouldn't have had that look on his face.
"We have to," I said.
"I wont tell we didn't if you wont!" he said.
"You will have sex with me. I haven't waited this long to be married and do nothing." I said.
"You…you're a virgin?" he asked smiling.
"You know if I kill you no one would know we didn't sleep together either," I said smiling.
"I'll…take the sex," he said and ran inside.
He was nervous and so was I. We kissed since that was the easiest for him. He kept bumping into my forehead with his. I figured by the end of the night maybe he'd accidentally fall on me and it'd be done. It wasn't that I didn't want to it was that he was even worse than I was. I handed him a book and he looked through it. The Kama sutra. If he didn't get it after reading that I'd be like Lisa Marie. Helping myself.
I looked up and he had this look in his eyes. He pounced. This time his kisses were intense and his hands were everywhere. Houston we have lift off. He was…amazing. I had to question had he ever done that before. I stopped when he asked me…I wont get into it. I'll just say I was glad I was his first and he mine. It was an amazing night and I still remember it.
It was time for us to go back to the factory. He didn't want the oompa loompas to think he ran off. The plane ride was okay. I enjoyed first class and he enjoyed bugging the hell out of everyone. He almost got slapped when he asked a lady how many months she was. Well, it was funny.
When we finally landed we hurried back home. Who would think a factory could be home. Once inside the oompas were all over him. He was showing off his ring. They had made us a welcome home cake. It looked like a wedding cake to me. It was incredible. Willy Wonka chocolate of course. It was late so we all turned in. I almost walked off to my room when Willy grabbed my hand.
"This way silly!" he said.
Then he went bug eyed.
"Unless we're going to be one of those couples that sleeps in separate rooms and meets to do the dirty!" he said.
"Willy?" I said.
"Yes honey bunny?" he smiled.
"No more blacksploitation movies for you," I said.
"Ah, I can dig it!" he said.
I dragged him to our room. Even that was weird. We lay there trying to sleep knowing we had tons of work the next day. Even with his bad sleeping habits (he never heard of personal space) it was nice. Then it hit me…finally. I was Mrs. Wonka. I married a nut. He looked weird, acted weird, and talked weird. I smiled. I wouldn't have him any other way. I drifted off into a wonderful sleep. I didn't need dreams anymore. I was living my dream.