A/N: I'm sorry to report that updates won't be as quick as they were previously. I'm gong to try to write as much as I can this weekend so that updates will be at least a regular one to two days, but school is going to tax my time.

The backyard of the Twickham House was a hill that fell from east to west and dipped slightly south so that the lowest point was at the base of some stairs coming off the porch. Luke had recently sodded it, so the grass was lumpy under Jess' feet. For some reason, he found the situation strangely disorienting. It may have just been the lack of oxygen, though, that resulted not only with his proximity to Rory Gilmore, but the anticipation of the fight. A fight that could resolve problems, or drive the wedge deeper.

Either way, Jess tried to pretend like it was of no consequence to him, and Rory appeared to be trying to convince herself much of the same, but she was always a bad liar. She did care, and a look of hurt had veiled her features.

He could see all of this because they just stared at eachother at the base of the hill. Jess' hands shoved into his pockets, matching a cold gaze to Rory's one of turmoil. Were there any words for what they had to say?

How could Jess convey the love, the anger, the frustration and disappointment? He felt like Mr. Knightley about to chide the oblivious Emma for her snide remark to Miss Bates. He hated that it was an Austen reference.

Finally, Rory spoke. It was a small voice. "Jess, you have to stop coming back like this."

"I didn't come here for you," Jess matched evenly.

"It doesn't matter, Jess! You're here, it hurts and it's distracting!" Rory's voice escalated and Jess could feel the screaming match looming over the corner. Giving in was his only option.

"I'm not going to apologize! What would you have me do? Skip Luke's wedding?" Jess scoffed, "You don't dictate my life!" He punctuated his words, pointing at her and at the ground. "And if you think you're the only one suffering for me being here, you're more selfish than I ever anticipated! This is not easy for me either!"

"And who are you to get on MY case about being selfish? How many times did you ride into town just to vanish again? You didn't call! You didn't talk to me! I could have helped you, Jess! I wanted this to work, but you only want me when you can't have me!"

Her use of present tense was ominous. Could she see right through him, or was she projecting?

"Oh, here it comes. Are you going to stone me afterwards, or do I get time to reflect on my crimes first? Please, Rory! It's been more than a year since I last saw you, and three since this was over. I'll admit neither were my finest moments, or any of the ones in between, but I haven't though about you since. I'm over this and you, Rory! I'm done! I have a life, and a job, and school, and family and a girlfriend! You could be so lucky to have a life like mine now that you've thrown yours away to commit felonies with that yuppie!"

"What do you know about it, Jess? You're one to talk, and you don't even know him! So I'm not perfect, anymore. I never was! I'm sorry to shatter your illusions about me!"

"It's not even about that, Rory. Take a year off from school, sort yourself out, do something forgivably stupid, but don't push away the people that love you and treat them like crap just because they have to audacity to question your judgement. And steering clear of felonious activity might not be such a bad idea either!"

"From Jess Mariano! This is priceless! Would you say it into a tape recorder? Or put it in writing? I'd like to hear it again!"

"Grow up, Rory! I've made mistakes, but at least I can own them."

Rory just bristled and started to walk away, but Jess caught her arm and prevented her from leaving. The resulting shocks were intoxicating, and he couldn't help put to pull her closer.

She stepped towards him, submitting to the decreasing proximity. Their eyes met, already falling heavy with anticipation. "Jess," she whispered nearly inaudibly, her lips milimeters from him. Jess had never been more disoriented in his life.

"Rory," he whispered back. He could feel Rory shudder as they met in the middle, each held captive by the other; arms entangled, fingers tugged to close even the smallest distance. It was a kiss of "I'm sorry," and "I missed you," that exchanged tortured longing between them.

But so much had been left unsaid. The simplicity was fleeting, evolving into anger-fueled passion that demanded to know "Why?" Rory's nails clawed at his back, inflicting a fraction of the pain connected to his numerous departures. The sensation shocked Jess, but nevertheless, elicited a groan into her mouth. The kisses were more forceful now, almost attempts to bruise, but Jess would be no more slave to her, than she to him. They stumbled backwards, Rory's back falling into the brick wall before he collided with her, anxious to close the gap between them.

The metaphor was misleading. Jess knew the Rory in front of him was not the Rory he fell in love with. This was an imposter-Rory who would hurt her friends, abandon her family, break up a marriage, lose her ambition and steal a boat. He had expected her to change, but not like this. Imposter-Rory was not a woman he could love, and Jess was desperate to coax the real Rory, whatever her mistakes, out from behind the imposing shadow. Two hands snaked into the tendrils of her hair guiding her and attempting to draw out the lost Rory.

Immediate effiorts were futile. Their fervor fell into frustration. There was no place for it to go. Kisses ebbed and Jess could feel a telling wetness against his cheek. They pulled away, Rory still against the wall, but Jess a step back. He was unafraid to look at her, but she couldn't seem to look at him.

"Jess...I'm happy with Logan." Her voice cracked and Jess felt like someone had hit him in the stomach with a baseball bat. Was it her pain, or his rejection?

He swallowed, unwilling and unable to find the strength to do anything more than nod and let her walk away.

----------

Jess only walked back inside after he had heard Rory and Logan drive away. He made a point to get his coat out of the foyer before he returned to the dining room, unwilling to stay and talk a second longer than necessary.

"I'm going to head out. I'll see you all tommorow."

The look of pity that eminated off of each one of them was intolerable.