Author: Aiseki Anrui

Summary: -Clover- Left alone in the Cage, A reflects upon why he can't forget C- and it's not because A loves him.

Disclaimer: CLAMP owns Clover. I am not making any money on one of CLAMP's (many) masterpieces. All I'm doing is dragging A out to play for awhile. After all, he's seems to have been forgotten. I must be pretty lonely in the Cage.

Author's Note: This is A angst. And yes of course, it's A/C (a.k.a. Ran). I've read every Clover fic on this site, and I've found that poor A seems to be sadly neglected. It's all Ran this and Gingetsu that... I love them too, but A... A's my favorite. And I still think Ran leaving him was pretty crappy. Poor A... You even killed B for him. Ungrateful Three-Leaf! (Just kidding, I like Ran too.)

Mirror Image

I wish I could forget your face.

If only you had been anyone else, it would have washed away by now. The memory would be blurred and distorted, more like a watercolor painting then a painfully precise portrait. If only you had been anyone else, you could have faded into an abstract and indistinct memory…. something I could lock deep in the prison of my mind, and never reach for it again. If only, if only….

If only I could forget you. If only for a little while.

Do you know what I would give for that? Blood, sweat, tears…all things that I gave you. I'd give them all again, only to forget you for just a little while. A day…..an hour….a minute, even. I'd do anything- I'd kill B a thousand more times, I'd leave the Cage and kill myself… anything for you to be wiped from my memory for just one moment.

If only you had been someone else, I could forget you. I'd cast your memory aside, draw myself up, and move on. If only you had been someone else. If only, if only…..

If only….

Your face was not my face.

If only….

Your hair was not my hair.

If only….

Your hands were not my hands

If only….

Your eyes weren't my eyes, staring back at me.

And God, if only….

If only it wasn't your face I see when I look in the mirror. If only it wasn't your voice I hear when I speak. If only it wasn't your hair brushing my shoulders, if only it wasn't your eyes that I see with….

I have your eyes, your hair, your hands, your face. I'm your twin, your double, a doppelganger, a clone. You're my mirror image, and I see you everyday. And because of that….. I can't forget.

Your face may be mine, but your heart isn't.

Your eyes may be mine, but your body isn't.

I have your eyes, your hair, your hands, your face. But not you. I can't ever have you. And everyday when I look in the mirror, I wish I didn't see you.

I wish I was blind.

Because then I'd only see myself.

-End -