A/n: I feel pretty good. I just completed two new theme lists for some drabbles (one based of book titles, and another on the song titles of my non-FMA CDs). I could always do the RoyAi 100 Themes, but I tried that once and felt no inspiration. I also am going to do EdWin drabbles based off of the episode titles and eight drabbles based off the homunculi (riddled with things related to the actual sins).

Oh, and for those who have read Interruption I think you'll get a kick out of this one. :)

Invisible johnny-I seem to have a fetish for characters not having parents. In another fic I have, only two characters have living parents that they get along with, the rest of them either have a bad relationship or they're dead. Glad you liked the drabble. :)

Amazonian Anime Queen-I would be nice, but at least this way there can be lots and lots of different interpretations. I think she was raised by her grandfather, and she originally joined the military because it was sort of expected of her. Then Roy came along…:)

Thanks to SwordmasterKevin, Fireness, and Lil-Kudo. :)

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

Paul Beatty

#9 Pint-sized Alchemist

Clothes rustled and fell to the floor, hands groped body parts, fingers racked through hair. Lips and tongues battled fiercely for domination as the heat rose between their bodies.

"Did you lock the door this time?" Riza murmured against his teeth.

A hand slithered from the curve of her hip, and flipped a small latch on the door.

"Yes,"

She moaned into his mouth as his scorching fingers returned to her equally hot skin.

"Isn't Edward supposed to come see you soon?"

Roy groaned, why did Full Metal have to come up now?

"I took care of him," he replied smugly.

Satisfied, Riza crushed her body against his, not a sliver of light could get between them. Their teeth clicked and cut into their dueling tongues, trying to choke the other.

However…as the tango between the two escalated…

"I can't believe him!" Ed seethed. "Send me on a wild goose chase will you Colonel Pony?" Ed's voice echoed throughout the cramped vent, his face burning red.

Several hours ago that jack ass Mustang had sent him and Al on a 'special mission' that had sent the two brothers running all over Central.

Around three in the afternoon (they'd started at eight in the morning) it occurred to them that Mustang had sent them out to keep them busy, away from him.

Ed had put it, with very little tact, that Mustang was probably with some woman, doing it on his desk.

That's how a plan of revenge came to the brothers…well, just Ed, Al didn't want to get involved. That was just fine with Ed, Al couldn't fit in the narrow air vents anyway.

Now, with a camera in hand, Ed had the perfect plan to embarrass Mustang and whatever woman he was with. He was right over Mustang's office, he could see the desk through the narrow slits of the shaft.

He couldn't see anyone, but he could hear voices; one was distinctly Mustang and the other…was defiantly female…

"How do you know he won't show up?"

Roy could have cried. They were so close! He'd almost gotten her bra off!

"Why are you so paranoid?"

Riza's eyes narrowed. "Do you remember what happened last time?"

Roy smiled confidently. "That's why I locked the door," he gave her a chaste kiss on the lips. "Don't worry. There's no way that pint-sized alchemist is going to show up—"

"PINT-SIZED!"

There was a loud thump from the vent above Roy's desk. The next thing they knew, a broken vent lay on the floor, along with a fuming Ed.

He didn't seem the least bit flustered by his entrance. He smiled triumphantly, as he held up his camera, snapping off shot after shot. "Let's see how respected you are when your subordinates see you've dragged—" he stopped short, his eyes widening. "Lieutenant Hawkeye?"

Riza's eyes could have melted steel. Her raging eyes flashed to Roy. "Never again! Not if there're people in the building!" she turned to Ed, and the boy was suddenly reminded off a cat about to catch a mouse, and then skin it and gut it. "Edward, give me that camera,"

That was when it dawned on Ed that the shots of a camera were nothing compared to the shots of a gun.

END