Disclaimer: Alas, I cannot be the lucky person named George Lucas to go around the universe proclaiming that I own Star Wars. But if he would ever like to give me Obi-Wan, I'd be more than grateful.

Summary: In an alternate universe where Qui-Gon lives, what else could change…? Obi-Wan tries to deal with feelings of jealousy, Anakin struggles with love, and Qui-Gon begins to doubt the Republic. A look at how the series could've turned out, starting with AotC.

Author's Notes: I'm sad to say there's no Obi-Wan in this chapter, but he should make an appearance in the next one. I hope you all enjoy the update!

Ally127 - Curiousity killed the cat...not really. Enjoy this chapter!

Twinkie - Yes, Qui-Gon does seem a bit blind to Obi-Wan's case. Poor Obi...

Darth Vengeance - You don't know how I long to give you all the answers to your questions. But I can't, so you'll just have to read on.

Athelassa - I'm glad you like it.

Larken27 - I'm trying to update as fast as I can! Hopefully I'm not taking to long for your taste.

I Unno - Sadly, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon will not be meeting again in this story. As for the next one however...well, you'll just have to wait and see!

Katieelessar - Well, Anakin will be Anakin... I can't promise he won't do anything foolish. As for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, I can't promise that either. I'm glad you enjoyed the brownies!

Ticklesivory - Very, very true. It was more of a disclaimer protecting me. I like it when Qui-Gon doesn't die, as well; that must be why I'm writing this!

Pirate Rhi - Thanks for reviewing!

Jealousy, Love and War

By Kekelina

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Chapter Eight: Anger and Blame

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Qui-Gon piloted their sleek, Nubian cruiser over the desolate, wind-swept dunes of Tatooine to their given coordinates. Normally, Anakin was the one that piloted the ships, but Qui-Gon's apprentice was showing signs of distraction and Qui-Gon had sent him off to relax somewhere onboard the ship. Qui-Gon couldn't blame him for not being able to focus, though as a Jedi apprentice, he should have been able to.

The trio had arrived in Mos Espa earlier today, intent on finding suitable accommodations for their purposes. However, they had gotten sidetracked when they happened to pass by Watto's junk shop and found the Toydarian sitting outside tinkering with a piece of merchandise. Watto hadn't recognized them at first, but after jogging his memory, the shop owner had informed him that he had sold Shmi Skywalker many years ago to a moisture farmer and that the moisture farmer (Lars) had freed and married her. He had given them the coordinates to the Lars Homestead, and the trio was on their way once again.

Qui-Gon knew he shouldn't have allowed their trip to the moisture farm, but a part of him realized that they were going to be on this barren planet for quite a while and it would be torture for his Padawan to be this close to his mother and not be able to visit her. It would do Anakin good to see his mother again, alive and well, instead of bleeding and dying in his recurring dreams. Qui-Gon had to admit he had never seen Anakin happier than when Qui-Gon said they could travel to the other side of Mos Eisley to see his mother.

Now, as they got closer to their end destination, Qui-Gon was beginning to doubt his own judgment – not something a Jedi should ever do. But he couldn't help it, for the nearer they got to the moisture farm, the more Qui-Gon felt like the Force was trying to warn him of something. He had, well, a bad feeling about this.

Qui-Gon saw the irony in that statement. How many times had his former Padawan, Obi-Wan, said that to him and he had simply dismissed it as Obi-Wan concentrating too strongly on the Unifying Force and not enough on the Living Force? How many times had Obi-Wan been right?

Too many, Qui-Gon thought sadly. Now Qui-Gon, who hadn't always believed his former apprentice's warnings, was telling himself the same thing. If he hadn't been able to believe Obi-Wan's feelings on numerous occasions, the least he could do was believe his own.

What was the Force trying to tell him?

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The warning the Force was sending him was stronger than ever as he landed the ship near the small hut centered in the moisture farm. He didn't tell his Padawan of his worries, though, for Anakin had been smiling and laughing as he told Padme stories of his childhood. It was so rare to see Anakin genuinely smile that Qui-Gon didn't dare wipe it off his Padawan's face.

"We're here," Qui-Gon told the duo as he opened the cruiser's door. Immediately, bright light from Tatooine's brilliant suns filled the ship, beckoning them out.

They strode down the ramp, Qui-Gon leading the way, and stepped out onto the sandy planet known as Coruscant. It was just as he remembered it: hot, dry and irritating. There was not a drop of water in the sun-heated air, every molecule having been captured by the vaporators. There was no planet-life, only sand, which his boots left footprints in as he moved carefully through the farm towards the house.

By now, the Force was screaming at him, and he took in all his surroundings in the blink of an eye. He had no knowledge of whether the Force was warning him of danger or something else, but he would be on his guard either way. Sometimes certain things led to danger.

They walked towards a weatherworn protocol droid trying to fix some sort of fence sensor. The droid noticed them with a surprised jump and went right into introducing himself.

"Hello, how might I be of service? I am See – "

"Threepio?" Qui-Gon's Padawan finished in surprise from beside the Jedi Master. Qui-Gon realized that it was indeed C-3PO, the protocol droid Anakin had built himself to help his mother. It looked like she was putting him to good use. He even had coverings, which he had been lacking when Anakin had left Tatooine to come with Qui-Gon to be a Jedi.

"Bless my circuits!" 3PO exclaimed, dropping the tool from his hand. "My maker! Master Ani, it is so good to see you again!" He turned to Qui-Gon and Padme. "And Miss Padme and Master Qui-Gon too! What a pleasure!" Qui-Gon smiled at the droid's excitement. He appeared to be thoroughly enjoying seeing them again. Ten years, after all, was quite a long time.

"Is my mother here?" Anakin asked, obviously not wanting to spend all day on this harsh planet talking to C-3PO.

All 3PO's excitement vanished in the blink of an eye and the warning Qui-Gon had felt earlier returned, stronger than ever. "Oh…I believe we'd better go indoors," he said softly, then turned and headed towards the hut.

A feeling of foreboding wormed its way through Qui-Gon, and by the look on Anakin's face, he felt it as well. It was more than just the Force speaking to them, for Padme looked worried also. It was a feeling of…despair? Yes, despair surrounded the house. Qui-Gon shot Anakin a worried glance, for his apprentice looked quite vulnerable at the moment, and motioned for the two to follow 3PO into the house. He followed just behind them, taking one last look around the sandy plain. Yes, something was definitely wrong here.

Qui-Gon followed the others down a flight of stairs dusted in a light layer of sand and heard 3PO's ringing voice at the end of the stairs. He caught up with the party just in time to oversee Anakin being introduced to his stepbrother, Owen Lars, and his girlfriend, Beru Whitesun. Qui-Gon tried to read his Padawan's face, but Anakin's back was to him. He sent a calming wave of the Force through their bond, figuring he would need it, and was glad when he sensed gratitude on Anakin's end of their bond. His Padawan may have been the Chosen One, but he was still human.

"I had a feeling you might show up someday," Owen said.

"Is my mother here," Anakin asked again.

Qui-Gon heard the whir of a hoverchair and turned his head slightly to see another man gliding over to the party. He was about Qui-Gon's age, with graying hair and an unkempt beard growing on his face, making him seem very rugged. Further inspection showed exactly why he needed to use a hoverchair to get around. His leg was missing. Qui-Gon had a feeling this man would provide some answers to the Force's warning.

"No, she's not," the man said, holding his hand out to Anakin. "I'm Cliegg Lars. Shmi is my wife," he explained. He looked at Anakin sadly. "We should go inside. We have a lot to talk about."

Anakin seemed to nod numbly as he followed Cliegg into the house. Qui-Gon stayed behind the group, the despair that filled this house finally filling him. He desperately pushed it out, not letting it catch hold of him. Whatever Cliegg told them, Anakin was going to need Qui-Gon's guidance. He had to remain firmly rooted, not letting the sense of dread pervade his own conscious.

He led them into what appeared to be the dining room and immediately Beru muttered something about getting drinks. Qui-Gon couldn't tell if she was simply being a good hostess or she didn't want to hear whatever Cliegg was going to tell them.

Cliegg glided over to the head of the table and motioned them to sit. Anakin sat in the seat to the right of Cliegg, while his stepbrother took the seat on left. Padme sat next to Anakin and Qui-Gon took the seat at the end opposite of Cliegg, watching everyone's expressions carefully. Then, once they were all seated (Beru was still in the kitchen), Cliegg spoke.

"It was just before dawn," he started as Beru came back in the room, carrying a tray of drinks for the group. No one made any motion for them as she set them on the table and sat down next to Owen.

From the look on their host's faces, Qui-Gon could tell this story was not one they wanted to hear again, which only confirmed his previous suspicions. He watched his Padawan carefully and found that, he too, seemed to know what the outcome of the tale would be. He sat very rigidly in his chair, head held high, though Qui-Gon could sense the fear and sorrow coursing through him. How he longed to make it all disappear! The Jedi now knew why Initiates were discouraged from contacting or forming any trace of a bond with their families.

"They came out of nowhere," Owen spoke quietly.

"A band of Tusken Raiders," Cliegg continued, looking at Anakin sadly. Qui-Gon couldn't help but notice the paternal look he gave Anakin, although he had never met him before. But technically, Qui-Gon realized, Cliegg was his stepfather. "Your mother had gone out early, like she always did, to pick the mushrooms that grow on the vaporators. From the tracks, she was about halfway home when they took her. Those Tuskens walk like men, but they're vicious, mindless monsters."

Anakin was now staring at the table, drinking in every word Cliegg spoke. Qui-Gon felt for the boy and longed to give him some comforting words. Padme, too, it seemed, was at a loss, though she seemed much more bewildered by the story than either of the two Jedi.

"We'd seen many signs that they were about," Owen reminded his father. "She shouldn't have gone out!"

"We can't live huddled in fear!" reprimanded Cliegg. Qui-Gon sensed that he had berated himself many times on the subject before in his guilt. "All signs were that we'd chased the Tuskens away," he offered Anakin. "We didn't know how strong this raiding band was – stronger than anything any of us have ever seen." He shook his head. "Thirty of us went out after Shmi. Four of us came back."

Qui-Gon sighed at the gravity of the situation. Twenty-six souls dead…

"I'd still be out there, only…after I lost my leg…" he said, rubbing the aforementioned stump. "I just can't ride anymore until I heal." Anakin nodded minutely in understanding. "This isn't the way I wanted to meet you, son. This isn't how your mother and I planned it. I don't want to give up on her, but she's been gone a month. There's little hope she's lasted this long."

Qui-Gon closed his eyes in grief and when he opened them, Anakin was on his feet. Qui-Gon started to question where he was going, but Cliegg beat him to it.

"Where are you going?"

"To find my mother," Anakin replied, trying and failing to keep the despair out of his voice. Qui-Gon shot up from his chair.

"No, Anakin," he said sternly.

"Master," he begged, his voice cracking. "I felt her. I feel her in the Force. She's alive. I can save her!"

Qui-Gon stared hard at his Padawan and felt his mixed emotions through their bond. Grief, despair, regret…anger. None of those were befitting of a Jedi Padawan. It was not wise to make decisions when those emotions were invading his thoughts, influencing his every move. Even if Shmi were still alive, Qui-Gon doubted she would be able to hold on until Anakin found her. And even if he did manage to find her alive, she wouldn't last much longer than that.

"No, Padawan," he repeated.

Anakin looked torn and Qui-Gon thought he looked like he was trying to decide if he should disobey his Master. Qui-Gon looked at him evenly, hating to have to be this forceful when the boy had just received such horrible news, and let him choose his destiny. It was the way of the Jedi, after all, to choose one's own path. The others watched the pair uncertainly, tension filling the room. Finally, Anakin sunk back into his seat, defeated.

The group let out a collective sigh and time seemed to unfreeze. Beru took the untouched glasses back to the kitchen, while Owen went into the other room. Cliegg apologized to Anakin again, then said something about having to fix something and left. Only the party of three remained.

Padme rose quietly from her seat and placed a compassionate hand on Anakin's shoulder, squeezing it softly. She then excused herself into the kitchen to help Beru, leaving Qui-Gon and Anakin alone.

"Anakin," Qui-Gon prompted gently. Anakin's gaze remained glued to the table. Qui-Gon walked over to his Padawan and placed his hand on the same shoulder Padme had squeezed moments before. He sat down in the chair next to Anakin and waited.

"I can't believe she's gone," Anakin finally managed to choke out. "She can't be gone. She can't be…"

There is no death; there is the Force.

"She has become one with the Force, Anakin. She is no longer suffering."

"She is," Anakin corrected. "I can feel her pain. She's dying…but she's not dead." He looked at Qui-Gon for the first time. "Why won't you let me go to her? Why are you letting her die?" Anakin's voice raised as he blamed Qui-Gon. The accusation stuck him like a lightsaber in the heart.

"It is too late, Padawan."

"No, it's NOT!" Anakin yelled at him. Qui-Gon recoiled as Anakin stormed out of the room towards the garage. He watched his Padawan stride away angrily while a deep sadness filled every fiber of his being.

Was he letting Shmi die?

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The Other Author's Notes: A little taste of Anakin's angry side, for all those who have been missing his usual temper. Don't be too shy to review! I love to hear what you guys think!