Disclaimer: No way am I going to own the anime in my life…because it's precious to Yuu Watase…I hope. Perhaps in my reincarnation, though. I find this chapter deliciously long…
"What the hell? Miaka, you are going to summon that damned god again? That is suicide! I mean, you will die without Taka protecting you every second!"
Crash! Luckily, Nuriko was in a good mood, so he was just thrown into the wall. Honestly, Tasuki swore he felt the wall shake.
"If I wasn't here to protect her, she would be in a brothel right now, Tasuki! Who said Taka had to be here to protect her? I could do that just as well!" Nuriko retorted huffily.
"You are just a dumb girl, Nuriko! Great, another damned burden to take care of besides Miaka!"
Crash!
"Honestly, Miaka would die in humiliation! We women are tough, right Miaka? Miaka?" Nuriko looked around. The Miaka they had been arguing about had disappeared. Tasuki grinned, his fangs flashing.
"Great! Let's have some fun then!"
Nuriko stood up from the floor immediately, blushing, though it could not be seen through the cape. "Tasuki, I am Nuriko, not Soi."
Tasuki greened slightly at the mention of Soi, the Seiryu Shinchiseishi of Lightning and Sex. "That bitch nearly drained Tamahome of his chi! I think I am going to be sick! Why him and not Chichiri? He was much more handsome by comparison! I hate women, they all have bad taste!"
"Tasuki, I find that you haven't changed after all…so what fun do you propose we have?" Nuriko asked curiously, taking a sip of Nuriko's special. She found that she could not take out the cloak Chichiri had bestowed on them because it was a spell.
"I really wanted to teach you the great bandit dance! What else? I want you to help out in the darned kitchen too! You are a dang good cook and maybe you can beat up a few damned rebels too!"
"No thanks. I want to daydream about Hotohori. Though I would cook up a few dishes if you want." Nuriko stood up and strode to the kitchen. Tasuki stared after her. The posture, the build and even the body looked like Ryuuen's. Like the Ryuuen in the Imperial Harem, that pervert.
He blushed slightly when he remembered having improper thoughts of Nuriko a lifetime ago. "Hell, I don't know how I will take it if Chichiri took the spell off. If she was uglier than I expected?"
A piercing scream shattered the silent air. It must have been a woman's; no man to shrill that high, except maybe Nuriko. "Get him outta you damned mind! Miaka's in trouble!" Tasuki yelled at himself, running in the direction of the kitchen. He threw open the door to reveal…
"Did I scream? Sorry, Tasuki, I was just a bit shocked that Miaka cleaned out your store of food in the kitchen. Now, you will need more food…sorry…" a delicate white finger pointed to the cause of the now empty kitchen.
"Mm…Tasuki, is there anymore smoked ham?" the priestess asked. Tasuki finally exploded; that was one thing to humiliate him in front of his men, and another thing to leave him and his bandits no food.
"Why does the Priestess of Suzaku get to eat meat? At least, I heard religious monks don't eat meat! They were doing it to get closer to the gods! Why wasn't there a law to say that the Suzaku no Miko have to be vegetarian?"
Crash! "That is because…" Nuriko dusted her hands, "Miaka would not have agreed to become the Miko if that happened."
"You are so stingy, Tasuki! I know that you keep extra food somewhere!" Miaka smiled. Nuriko looked at her with relief written all over her face. At least Miaka was not moody. Only Hikari could do that to her…and Taka. Oh, did she mention that giving birth was as bad as leaving Taka?
"Wow, you must be in serious pain now, since Taka isn't here," Nuriko muttered, ignoring the distressed Tasuki, who was banging his head on the wall. She had an idea. "If only Chichiri's here…"
As expected…
"DAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Woah, you scared me!" Tasuki yelped, forgetting about the missing smoked food in the kitchen. "Don't scream out 'DAAAAAAA!' like that, you'll give me a heart attack! You look so much like Taisukun, I could not tell the difference!"
Crash! "Chichiri do not look like Taisukun! It is his mask, you idiot! The happy, always smiling mask! His face is as young as ever!" Nuriko scolded.
"Oh…why don't she try out that idea too? Taisukun could wear a mask and stop giving heart attacks to those Nyan Nyans!" Tasuki suggested.
"Nuriko, hit him."
Crash! That was when Tasuki saw the person who appeared right after Chichiri. It was Taisukun and she did not look happy.
"Chichiri, I want to see the Suzaku no Miko and the Seishi Nuriko. Take off your spell." With that, the cloaks melted off them. Chichiri grinned. Nuriko and Miaka really felt that Chichiri had some kind of problem. He never grinned, smiled gently, yes, but not grinned.
"What your damned problem, Chiri? Why are you grinning like that?" Tasuki asked, getting up after Nuriko's effortless punch.
"Taka is coming from the other world, no da!"
"That doesn't explain any darned thing!"
"He is COMING? My Taka…"
"Really, that's something to smile about, but why is Taisukun with you? She does not appear just anywhere!" Nuriko said, jerking a finger at the old lady's direction.
"Yeah, Grandma is too ugly to show up anywhere else except in her damned residence mountain! And I had better forget that she had visited my place; hell, she would defame it!" Tasuki shouted, obviously unhappy to see the old lady again.
"Nuriko…" Taisukun started.
Crash!
"So what about Taka?" Miaka asked anxiously. "Is he coming? How?"
"He is coming through the book with the ring, if he even thought of it. Except that he had misplaced the ring and it had rolled under the table of his room. Now, Taka is still going home, hopefully to find a connection, and we know that he couldn't find any except for the ring. Knowing him, he would eventually find it, but it would be quite a while later. Now, we have something more important to discuss."
"What's wrong? We had it easy this time around, so nothing could go wrong, right?" Nuriko asked, remembering her death at the snowy mountains with Ashitare. "Why is it always in mountains that something interesting always happens?" she muttered. "Why couldn't it be in the palace or something? At least, the Harem would be livelier with gossip."
"No, Tenkou had vanished, so I assume that you will all have an easy start. The problem was…money."
"Houki could give us that."
"Another thing was the mode of summoning Suzaku."
"We had already decided who'd be the woman, no da."
"Miss Shouka and Chirko's girlfriend are invalid."
"What the hell!"
"Miss Shouka had been married to Mitsukake two days ago. And Chiriko's girlfriend…"
"Chiriko would be too young to even propose marriage!" Miaka said in disbelief. "How could his girlfriend not be a virgin…"
"His girlfriend was a concubine of his father."
There was a hush about the kitchen. Nuriko was holding back tears and Miaka clutched her tightly, crying. "Poor…Chiriko…seeing his beloved girlfriend love his father…his heart must be broken over and over again." Miaka choked out.
"It is because he had delayed to reincarnate that made him so near, yet so far from his beloved. Don't worry, Chiriko's next life would be spent with her as husband and wife. But that is not what I am talking about."
"Okay, Taisukun, let's just grab any girl from the streets and use her body and in return she would get the third wish," Nuriko suggested. Taisukun shook her head and Nuriko looked crestfallen.
"The lady must have ties of love either to the Suzaku no Miko or her Seishi."
"Mayo…oh, no da. She is in love with Taka, no da."
"Now what, we are stuck?" Nuriko asked, exasperated. "Tasuki and Chichiri could date other women then!"
"What the hell! I don't even like friggin women!" Tasuki blurted out.
"I am a monk, no da. I got a code of conduct to adhere to, no da. Rule number one, no women, no da…" Chichiri faltered. "What about Hotohori?"
"Let's see. Mits is out, Chiri is out, Gen-chan is out, I am out, Hotohori could be considered, Chiriko is still a child, Taka is married…that leaves Hotohori as our only chance. It seems risky, do you know that?" Nuriko asked Taisukun. "Not to mention that Hotohori was extremely picky with his women! They must be prettier or on par with him!"
"What the hell! We had to take a gamble with that damned narcissist emperor?" Tasuki asked. Miaka nodded weakly, wiping her tears and letting go of Nuriko.
"If that is the case, then Nuriko have to suffer heartbreak again, no da…unless she doesn't love him any longer, no da…" Chichiri observed. Tasuki cursed colourfully until Taisukun hit him on his head with his own metal fan to silence him.
Taisukun sighed. "Nuriko, do you consider yourself a virgin?"
"Yeah, why? I cannot date anyone here, not if they knew that I was once a gay, you know!" Nuriko said, shrugging, "So no ties of love! If you want to know, I have given up on Hotohori already, so no love there either."
"Do you love the Suzaku no Miko?" Taisukun pressed on. Nuriko looked at the old woman floating in the air oddly.
"As in…how I once loved her as a man? No way, I have changed that love into a sister-like one and I am never going to change it! And it means that I have to be a lesbian and I will be going against Taka!" Nuriko blurted out.
"What the hell! Nuriko, you loved Miaka that way before? You must have been friggin desperate!" Tasuki laughed. He was silenced by Miaka, this time, who was blushing to the roots of her hair.
"So you do love the Suzaku no Miko, as a sister, right?" Taisukun continued.
"Only as a sister," Nuriko confirmed.
"Then I order you to join with the Miko as one to summon Suzaku!" Taisukun announced. Nuriko sighed.
"Why does it always have to be me?"