Disclaimer: same as always the only thing I own is Shadow and everything else I use in my fics I don't own.
Summary: This chapter is going to focus on Shadow's conversation and relationship with Raven. I've decided to have a one-sided ShadowxRaven. Raven will always see him as the 'brother' she can rely on to understand and care. If Shadow were to have his way she would never find out about his feelings. If I word this conversation right, it will focus on how Raven learns to forgive and understand Robin's reasons for the Red X incident. In the show X is one of my fav characters so whenever he comes into the story I will put major emphasis on how it affects everyone. Now, on with the story.
'Now, to face the challenge of making Raven understand Robin's reasoning behind what he did. Despite what his teammates may think he did have good reasons for doing what he did. Even though I told him their point of view he didn't have time to include them and train them if he was going to make his ruse convincing to Slade. He had to begin stealing those chips as soon as possible afterwards of Slade would have been to worried about a trick.' Shadow was deep in thought as he quickly scaled the sides of the tower on his way to the roof. He had to be cautious, he couldn't risk a security camera catching him for fear of Robin finding out that he had met any other Titans. 'I can't have the Titans I do know, find out that I'm friends with any of the others. I just don't want those relationships ruined by differing opinions of what I'm like. For instance, if Richard or Raven found out the activities I do when I'm around Garfield, it would ruin their opinions of how serious and thought-provoking I can be.'
The black form was weaving in and out of the security cameras ranges in a pattern so complex, Slade would have had difficulty maneuvering through the tangled web and complex maze that Cyborg thought didn't exist. 'To be quite honest with myself I don't exactly understand any of the friendships I have forged with these people. Robin, well more like an older brother that I'll always try, without success, to outdo at anything I can think of. Beastboy, well he's more like the little brother I never even new I wanted until I actually met him. He just seems to bring out the playful side I thought had died the day I discovered that Rich would always outdo me. Raven… what is it about Raven that I feel I can relate to. I know we're both dark, mysterious, and even creepy at times, but our pasts are both incredibly different. When I first met her, she told me about the prophecy made at her birth, being the daughter of the most powerful demon in hell, and about the difficulties of having to control her emotions. And yet, even she says that I'm darker, creepier, and more withdrawn than her. She keeps telling me that to be allowed to feel emotions is a gift, but I disagree with her. While she had a bad life that no one could have changed, that was pretty much set in stone from the beginning, and no amount of her parents choices after her birth could have made her any different, I feel I had the harder more unforgiving life. When I actually took the time to ponder this, I realized that I am more emotionless than her because I chose to be this way because I had no hope. Plenty of people in my past could have made growing up easier on me, my parents could hace spent just a portion of their time trying to reach out and encourage me, but they didn't, they put all of their energy into making Robin the person he is today, kind, caring, compassionate, unshakeable morals, and a deep sense of justice. Bruce, could have put forth some effort into training me, teaching me, or even just talking to me, but he didn't, he left me to fend for myself, I taught myself how to be a hero, and now he has the utter nerve to say that he taught me better than what I am when he is being looked down upon by his friends the "Just-us League". Even the other superheroes could have given me advice but they would just look at me with contempt and mutter, "Are we sure he's Robin twin?" Raven can at least hope for a semblance of happiness in her future, I have no hope that I will be treated differently in the future. So, I gave up years ago.'
As Shadow crept over the edge of the roof, he heard the familiar "Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos" ringing through the air like a soft and distant melody, half remembered in a memory from the past. Silently, without even her noticed his shrouded aura, he sat down beside her, imitating her meditation practices.
"Azerath metrion Zinthos, Azerath Metrion Zinthos." His raspy voice slipped out, knowing that he didn't have all night to wait for her to finish and talk to him. He still had one more person to visit after he finished his chat with her.
Raven let out a startled gasp when the rough coarse voice shattered the symphony hers wrote. She spun her heard around and let out an audible sigh of relief when she recognized who was interrupting her preciously needed meditation. Had it been anyone else she would have attacked them for making her feel so surprised and scared, but this was Shadow after all and he understood her reasons for acting the way she did. 'He wouldn't have disturbed me if it wasn't urgent and if he had enough time to do so. I wish I knew his reasons for acting the way he does. He's allowed to show emotion but he refuses to, it's all so confusing. I would give up almost everything to not be the way I am but he has a choice to act and feel the way he does but he reverts to being an emotionless shell. I'll admit I envy his control, with my highly advanced empathic abilities never once have I sensed an emotion coming from him. It's as if he's a robot, a soulless machine without any purpose in life. And yet, if I describe an emotion that I'm confused with to him, he knows exactly what it is and how to work through it. The one time I did ask him why he would choose to be this way, he said that he had weighed the options and this was the only reasonable life for him. What could have happened in his life to make him choose this?'
"What." She said in an emotionless monotone yet there was annoyance laced in with it.
"I came to see your side on the events of today. You know, The "Red X' thing." He said the last part to avoid her trademark "Nothing's wrong, and everything's fine" routine.
Raven visibly winced, knowing that he already knew the events from earlier, and that she had no way of dodging his questions tonight. "All you need to know is that My leader didn't trust me and has now lost my trust in him." Short quick and to the point, she didn't want to argue with him about it tonight.
"Really, did you happen to ask what his side of the story was? Did you try to understand his reasons? Or did you just cling to the fact that you're smarter than him and therefore you are right?" he stated with anger and challenge written in with those statements, for once showing emotion in his voice. Raven was startled. She had never considered that it might have been her own pride that made today so trying. She hadn't stopped to consider or even listen for that matter, Robin's reasoning behind his actions. She should have, she was living proof that there were gray areas in between good and evil, being the daughter of a demon and all. Guilt coursed through her, she knew better and Shadow was disappointed for her not understanding that.
"Have you ever considered just how trying this Slade problem might be on Robin? I have, I knew what his life was like back in Gotham as the Bat's apprentice. He had always succeeded no matter how much responsibility was placed on him. But here, he's failing for the first time in his life, and he has so much more riding on him this time. For once, he doesn't have someone making the decisions for him and he's having to rely on people who aren't as…committed…to this cause as he is. He doesn't have the support beams he's always had and he as trouble trusting people to be his new ones. You need to understand that." The full weight of Shadow's words slowly settled on her as she sat unmoving on the rooftop. She knew he was right. Slade was the hardest thing any of them had had to face yet and it was destroying most of their states of mind.
"Raven…" his voice was soft and forgiving. "Everyone one has to deal with pride at some point in their lives, even you. Now that you've realized it, you can fix it before the problem becomes worse. I know you've sensed the guilt and remorse coming from Robin because it's causing your conscience to fall to pieces. But you have realized it early enough that you can salvage your friendship with Robin, and maybe at the same time become one of his pillars of support. He needs those now more than ever. So please try."
"I will," raven said with a final note of understanding in her voice. "But how do you know so much about Robin? I mean, You seem to know more than I do and I live with him." She was rather suspicious, how did he know about a past Robin had never revealed to his team? Did he actually know Robin? Was he sticking up for a friend he knows better than most?
It wasn't till months later that she would realize just how close to the truth she was at that moment in time because he silenced those questions with a simple statement. "I spy with my little eye kid, I spy." With that he disappeared beyond even her enhanced senses.
'Why does he always call me "kid" whenever he says goodbye. And just how old is he? Raven silenced those thoughts and stored them away for later recollection. She knew what she had to do the next day and she was gonna need as much rest as she could get to try and apologize to Robin and talk about the reasons he did what he did. Teleporting herself straight into bed she sighed, "Tomorrows gonna be a long day." And with that she fell straight to sleep.
Behind a jet-black mask a smile came to a face. 'Two down, one to go.'
Beastboy's room was a total disaster area. Piles of…stuff littered the floor of the vegetarian's private sanctum. While walking through this train wreck Shadow visibly cringed, he could have sworn he saw BB's socks slithering along the ground. 'T still don't get how someone so optimistic and carefree could have idolized me so much. Am I just someone he knows will keep his deepest secrets hidden away from the world? Or am I the "cool" big brother he always needed?' Shadow was jerked out of his thoughts by Gar grumbling about something in his dream. 'I feel sorry for the person who has to wake him up after having his "beauty sleep" interrupted.' Shadow smirked underneath his mask after recalling what Gar referred his sleeping cycle to. 'He might want to just go to sleep and never wake up if he wants to be considered beautiful.'
"Gar…"No answer.
"Gaarr…"Yet again, no answer.
"Garfield Logan, you wake up right now or I will never, I repeat, NEVER, play another video game with you in your entire pathetic life."
"DUDE, please nononononoNO! You have to play with me, you have to, I couldn't go on in life without being able to see if I've improved against you or not!" BB was going into hysterics right now, and if you didn't know what was going on he looked like his girlfriend was dumping him.
"Fine I'll still play with you, on a few conditions…" Shadow was smiling, he wouldn't have to try and convince Gar about anything. This discussion was over before it even started. Who knew Beastboy had become so dependant on video games?
"I'LL DO ANYTHING, ANYTHING!" he was creating a pond of tears in his room now.
'Good, maybe the tears can succeed where nothing else has. Getting rid of that tofu reek.' "Alright, here are the ground rules: First, forgive Robin about the incident with X. Second, clean up this room and keep it clean for a month. And last but not least, no fights about tofu and meat with Cyborg for one month." Shadow couldn't help but smile evilly about that last one.
"First two, phfft, no problem, but no fighting with Cy, bro that's cruel and unusual punishment. You mean I have to sit there and watch eat ME without saying a word!" Gar felt that this was going beyond far. "Nuh-uh, no way am I living through that. You're not the boss of me." He then folded his arms across his chest and put on a stubborn facade.
"Fine then, I guess I'll have to give my limited edition," 'Hook,' "one out of a hundred," 'Line,' "copy of mega-monkeys 3 director's cut to him then. I'll just go slip it under his door." 'and Sinker.'
"Wait, WAIT! I'll do it, I'LL DO IT! Just please give me that game."
'Knew it.' "All right, it's yours, as long as you keep those promises and tell everyone that it was pushed under your door tonight by a fan. Understood. I don't have time to play tonight, but don't worry I'll play for two hours next visit." Nothing was better to get BB to agree to any deal than bribing him with a game, especially when that game is only one of a hundred made.
Beastboy was just nodding dumbly as he was staring at the holy grail of all games as it was set gently(in his yes with all reverence) into his unworthy hands.
Shadow quickly left the boy he would never admit was like a younger brother to him to his "beauty sleep". As he left the tower he felt the emotions of his loved ones calm and become like unto an undisturbed lake with perfectly still and calm waters. He sighed with relief, he felt as if he had done something that made his existence worthwhile. The discovery that there may be a reason for him to live made him feel a sense of peace he had never experienced. That was it, he would not rest as long as those three had trials and needed advice on how to deal with them. He now had a purpose, to protect, care for, and defend anyone he cared about. With that he strode back to his bike, leapt inside and closed the casing of it around him, then he silently raced off into the east towards the flaming sunrise.
How was that one? Like it? Hate it? I'll even receive flames just as long as I know people are reading and getting some reaction to my work. Thank you. The next chapter is going to cover the situation after The Apprentice episodes.
I know that Shadow appears to be condescending and proud in the partswith Raven. Later on the Titans will learn more about him during his captivity inside Cadmus, but that wont be until after the End. I'm only going to cover certain incidents that deal with the ones he has a connection to. And those four, I'm not going to reveal the fourth one yet, will find out about the others knowing Shadow by Speedy(who I think is somewhat of a blabbermouth). Once again please read and review. It will get to the action/adventure part in the near future, around the time when someone steals the Red X suit.