Most of the battle-weary souls making their way to the gate she did not recognize, and she doubted the darkness of very early morning had anything to do with it. Of the thirteen, she could name no more than four or five, Vincent and her son among them. Unlike the others, those two walked alone, keeping their gazes lowered.
Aeris was not the first to reach the gate, but she was the first to give Lucrecia any notice. "Well," she said, pausing for a moment and glancing back over her shoulder, "we've brought him back."
She bowed her head gratefully. "I thank you, though I know you didn't do it for me."
The Cetra smiled hesitantly and then turned to follow her friends. Lucrecia looked after her curiously, but soon turned to watch Vincent as he made his way up to her. He stopped a polite distance away, and she wondered why he bothered before she realized that thirty-five years of isolation could not be forgotten so easily, even for her.
"Welcome back, Vincent," she greeted. "How did things go?"
He held her gaze with apparent effort and answered softly, "Hojo is dead, as is Talya. However, we have brought both Sephiroth and Minerva, Hojo's... newer 'specimen,' back with us. None on our side were seriously injured."
She nodded, looking him over to make sure he wasn't making light of the matter, then stepped closer to embrace him. "I'm glad you're back safe."
He placed his good arm around her. "And I am glad to find you waiting for me."
"Why wouldn't I be waiting?" she asked, not expecting an answer. After a moment she drew back, watching the last few people making their way up the steps. A girl with silver hair and a stoic expression, walking with a redhead, captured her attention for a moment; this must have been Minerva, she concluded. And, trailing some paces behind them, came Sephiroth, head down and melancholy gaze intent on the steps beneath his feet.
She hated to see him thus and wanted nothing more than to embrace him, but she knew she could not. Not yet. So when he reached her, she only smiled and said, "Welcome back, Sephiroth."
He slowed to a stop and looked up at her, blinking in confusion. At last something like recognition crossed his face. "...Mother?"
Lucrecia nodded. "Oh, it's so wonderful to hear you call me that," she said. "Wonderful to see you." She turned to Vincent, smiling apologetically. "Do you mind, dear? I'd... like to have some time alone with him."
"I understand," he said, gesturing for her to go ahead.
Taking Sephiroth's hand, Lucrecia led him back to her room at the inn, glad to find it as vacant as she had left it. There she pulled him inside and let go his hand, turning to get a better look at him.
Sephiroth quietly closed the door, then turned to study her, though he avoided meeting her eyes. "I suppose Aeris revived you," he said at last.
"Yes," she confirmed, unable to keep her eyes off of him. Her son! "You've grown so much since I last saw you," she said, laughing to hide the regret in her voice. "You were just a baby then, and now... You've become such a handsome man, even if you are a little battle-worn."
He only shrugged.
Sitting down on one of the beds, she beckoned him closer. He sat down awkwardly on the bed opposite her.
"And you have my eyes," she went on. "I'm so proud."
Blinking in startlement, he finally met her gaze. "What do you have to be proud of?" he wondered bitterly.
Her smile faded, and she looked down at her lap. "Vincent would have it that I didn't know about all you've done... But I do." She looked back up at him. "I don't condemn you for it. Not a bit. I only... I'm so sorry that I was never there for you, all those times when you were alone and in doubt."
"You died. How could you have been?"
She shook her head. "The Jenova brought me back eventually; you know how it is. I... I should have tried to return to you, even though..." She trailed off, shaking her head again. "Anyway, I made so many mistakes before hand that led to the whole mess."
"You could not have foreseen what would happen," he stated. "It was not your fault."
Lucrecia smiled and looked up at him, only to find him staring at his feet again. "I suppose we've both made mistakes, Sephiroth, and they're partially our faults, partially the faults of others."
He frowned. "My actions were my own. Thousands died at my blade, and no amount of water can cleanse these hands." He held the two before him, staring at them as though he could see the blood of those thousands staining them even through the gloves.
Moving to sit beside him, she took one of his hands in her own. "I don't want you to do as Vincent has done, punishing yourself for decades for your mistakes, no matter how great they were. Punishment will get you nowhere. It doesn't undo what's been done, nor does it make up for it in any way. You should live your life, and use it to save others, as you did for Katrina, as you did for Kari, as you did for Aeris."
"I took Aeris's life to begin with," he replied coldly. "It was only fitting I gave it back."
"You could have let things lie," she reminded him. "You could have easily dismissed her as dead and gone, a person of the past, but you didn't. You brought her back, and I know it couldn't have been easy for you."
"For either of us," he amended. "She has had a harder time of it than I. Her love married another, and she has been swept up in my own personal battles, first with Hojo... and now with Jenova."
"And she is a reminder to you of all the wrong you've done," Lucrecia said. "Isn't she?"
Sephiroth blinked, glancing at her. "I had not thought of it that way. But... yes, I suppose she is. And yet, she helped me in so many ways."
"Even though she was a victim of yours, she treats you kindly, doesn't she?" she asked, watching her son closely.
He shifted uncomfortably and kept his gaze lowered. "Too kindly for one such as me. She is too reckless."
"You mean how she insists on helping her friends to fight their battles?"
"That... and her insistence on remaining close to me. I am still dangerous, and I wish she would stay away. And yet..."
"And yet she's your friend," Lucrecia finished, "and you want her close."
He nodded mutely.
"Well, you don't seem dangerous to me," she decided. "Although, being your mother, I suppose I'm biased. Still, I've watched you for a very long time now. I think I know you well enough to say you won't hurt her."
Sephiroth shook his head, not reassured. "You cannot know what goes on inside my head, or what I've done these past few days."
She looked at him searchingly. "Do you want to tell me?"
"No."
Sighing, she gave his hand a final squeeze and let it go. "Well, if you ever want to talk, about anything or about nothing at all, I'm here for you. Will you remember that?"
"I will," he answered, getting to his feet.
Lucrecia stood, too. "Where are you off to?" she wondered, not wanting him to go.
He had already gone to the door, and he paused to glance at her over his shoulder. "Somewhere where I can be alone, to think. Besides, I am sure you and Vincent have much to say."
She nodded. "We do. But... You're my son, and this is the first time we've spoken. I..."
Furrowing his brow, he turned to face her. "What is it?"
She crossed the short distance between them and slipped her arms around him, holding him close. "My son, all grown up, no longer a child," she said, trying in vain to explain the turmoil of emotions she was feeling. "I never got to watch you grow, never got to hold you... And now... Now it seems you're beyond my reach. You've become who you are, and I had no part in it."
He felt tense in her arms, and she began, reluctantly, to pull herself away. "I'm sorry," she murmured. "I'm being selfish, aren't I?"
"No," he said, tentatively returning the embrace. "I... I have longed for this moment as much as you have."
"You were so lonely, weren't you?" she asked sadly.
"Yes..."
Drawing back slowly, she looked up at him. "Are you still lonely?"
He looked away and did not answer.
"Well," she sighed, "I suppose nothing changes too quickly."
Sephiroth only shrugged.
She offered him a smile. "Now, I've delayed you long enough, unless you've changed your mind. I'm sure you have much to think about, so go on and find your isolated spot. Or maybe you'd rather find Aeris?" When he did not reply, she fingered a lock of his tangled silver hair. "You should wash up first, though, and find something to wear that isn't full of holes."
Her scrutiny seemed to make him uncomfortable, and he nodded curtly and turned to go. He hesitated a moment in the doorway, then slipped out into the hall and closed the door behind him. Lucrecia remained where she stood for a long moment and then sat down on the bed, her gaze still on the door.
Her son was all grown up, and more like Vincent than she had thought. That alone was enough to worry her. He found too many faults in himself. But that Aeris girl... He had never had any friends before, not really, but he considered her one. He had done many things for the Cetra, she was sure. And he had said Aeris was helping him, too.
Helped, he had said. Past tense. He wanted her to stay away, he had said. She frowned, hoping he was only insecure and did not intend to avoid the girl. His past deeds already isolated him enough; he did not need to actively seek out solitude.
A knock sounded at the door, and she looked up, her thoughts scattering. "Come in."
Vincent stepped in quietly, and she smiled at him as he faltered. "Sephiroth left, so I assumed that..."
She nodded, inviting him to sit beside her. "Yes, we're through talking for the moment, and your company is quite welcome."
He sat down near her, watching her indirectly and saying nothing.
"Tell me... What is he to Aeris?"
Vincent blinked, apparently surprised by the question. She wondered what he had been expecting. "She means a lot to him," he answered, "though how much is difficult to surmise. As for Aeris... I am not sure. She is very kind to him, but she's that way with everyone."
"Mm," she said thoughtfully. "We'll have to keep an eye on those two, won't we?"
"Indeed."
She lay back on the bed. "The last of the Cetra and a creation of science," she mused aloud. "Opposites. Of course, they do say opposites attract." She looked over at Vincent with a knowing smile. "But then, they're never very different in the end, are they?"
He tilted his head and did not reply. She hadn't expected him to.
"You look tired," she remarked. "And dawn is a long time in coming. Why don't we get some sleep? We'll talk once you're rested."
Vincent nodded and made to get up, but she caught his arm.
"There's no need to move," she said. "Is there?"
He seemed hesitant. "But..."
"But what? I want to sleep at your side, Vincent. My dreams have been troubled without you."
He held her gaze for a long moment, then nodded. He pulled off his boots and undid the clasps on his cape, casting them aside, and lay back.
Lucrecia settled herself at his side, her head on his chest. She felt something cold against her and realized that she lay at his left; his claw rested straight beside him, and she could feel it through her clothes. She made no mention of it, however, not wanting to make Vincent any more uncomfortable with himself. Besides, she loved him, and she would accept all of him, however dark or monstrous some parts had become.
It had surprised him that Nanaki had found beds for everyone who needed them, even the Turks. As he hadn't been able to sleep on the airship, Reno had conked out in the home of some shopkeeper as soon as he'd been led there. By the time he finally woke, it was almost noon. He rolled out of bed, stuffed his feet into his shoes, and went off in search of food.
His quest, however, was quickly forgotten when he caught sight of Minerva walking slowly along the strip of shops, looking at the wares. Whenever anyone tried to talk to her, she only shook her head. Reno walked over to her, hoping he'd have better luck.
"Hey," he greeted.
She stopped and glanced at him. "Hello."
"Window-shopping?"
"Excuse me?"
He gestured to the shops. "You know, looking at stuff when you're not going to buy anything." When she did not seem to understand, he asked, "Did nobody ever tell you about life outside the lab?"
Minerva shook her head. "I've pieced some things together from Talya's words, but I do not fully understand. I have not had enough time to learn on my own."
"Ah," he said, contemplating how to go about explaining it. "Well, you see, if you want something, you've gotta pay money for it. Uh, you know what money is, right?"
She nodded curtly.
"So to pay for stuff, you've gotta make money. People do it in different ways. You've got people like these shopkeepers here, and then you've got your mercenaries, laborers, entertainers, things like that."
She nodded again, her gaze sweeping over the shops with new understanding before returning to him. "What about you?"
Reno ran a hand through his hair. "Me? I'm a lazy bum. I don't work, and I don't get paid. Elena, Rude, and Reeve work, and I live with them."
She glanced at him. "I see. They support your needs."
"Yeah. Well, I mean, I work occasionally. Odd jobs that people have for me. But you know, I'm not really good for much."
Minerva seemed dubious, but she made no rebuttal. "Where do you live?" she asked instead.
"Over in Junon."
Another nod, to his disappointment. She had almost seemed curious about him, but now she turned her attention back to the shops. He looked her over, noting the many tears and bloodstains in her clothing.
"Did you want new clothes?" Reno asked. "I'll buy you something."
She blinked and looked down at herself, not seeming to find anything wrong with what she had. "What for?"
"Well, you kinda need 'em," he said.
"Nn. But why would you waste your money on me?"
"I'm not allowed to be generous for once in my life?"
"You... have already done so many things for me," she said hesitantly.
He shrugged it off and grinned. "So've you. Anyway, it's no big deal."
Minerva studied him for a moment, her expression unreadable. What was she thinking? he wondered. Had no one ever bothered with even something so simple as this? "All right," she said at length.
"Okay then. Well, it looks like you've got lots to choose from, so take your time and find something you like."
"Like? It does not matter to me."
"What do you mean, it doesn't matter?" he queried. "I'm pretty sure you'd object if I bought you something pink and frilly."
This didn't seem to amuse her. "Functionality aside, I have no preference."
"Not even a favorite color?" he asked incredulously.
She shook her head.
"Well... have you always worn blue and black?"
"Yes."
"Then how about a change?" Reno suggested. "I bet you'd look good in red."
"All right."
But she did not stop anywhere. Shaking his head, he put a hand on her shoulder and ushered her into the nearest one. She pulled back immediately, casting him a sharp look.
He ignored it. "Pick something out, why don't you?"
Minerva turned to the shelves of clothing with a sigh, snatching up what must have been the first red thing she saw. It was a sleeveless crop top, lacing up by the neck, but she showed it to him without expression.
"Um... It's neat, but would you actually wear that?"
She shrugged, turning away. "I told you, it makes little difference to me." She selected a pair of green shorts without hesitation and turned back to him expectantly.
"Not into skirts, I take it," he remarked.
She shook her head. "Skirts are impractical."
"Always the logical approach."
"That is the only approach I have ever known," Minerva replied. "What other is there?"
"Emotional, I guess," he answered.
"Well?" she prompted.
"Right." He went to the shopkeeper to pay for the clothing and asked about a place where the girl could change. The woman pointed her to a door in the back of the store, and Minerva disappeared inside, returning a few minutes later in her new attire, old clothes folded and tucked under one arm.
Reno whistled appreciatively. He had to say he liked the new look better. (More skin was always better in his book, never mind what they said about leaving something to the imagination.) This way he had a great view of her slim waistline and the perfect musculature of her arms. And, he noticed, a tattoo of the number twenty-three on her right shoulder.
"You look great," he told her, but she did not reply. "What're you gonna do with your old clothes?"
She shrugged. "Dispose of them."
"No sentimental value?"
"Why would there be?" she asked sharply.
He held up his hands. "Hey, I dunno."
"Miss," said the shopkeeper, "if you're just going to get rid of them, I'll take them."
Minerva turned and handed her the clothing without a word.
"Thanks again," Reno said, then turned to his silver-haired companion. "Come on, let's go."
She followed him out of the store, watching him uncertainly. "Where exactly are we going?"
"I dunno. We're walking."
She scoffed and said nothing.
"What's with the tattoo?" he asked finally.
"Hojo considered me something like a clone of Sephiroth, regardless of facts."
Reno quirked an eyebrow. "You may look a lot like him, but you're definitely not a clone." Silence from her. "Do you have parents?" he asked.
"I suppose you could say that," she replied, avoiding his gaze.
"Who were they, do you know?"
"Talya was my mother," she replied dispassionately.
He stared at her for a moment. "She was your mom? And she died..." She did not seem to like what little sympathy he was showing, so he decided to drop it. "What about your dad?"
"I will not tell you. It is best if no one knows."
"Is he alive?"
"Yes."
"Do you like him?"
"Yes."
"Then what's wrong with telling someone?"
She shook her head. "There is no need for you to know either the answer or the reason," she stated, a bitterness in her voice and her eyes. "I will keep it to myself as I have done with everything else."
Reno couldn't help wanting to comfort her, but when he moved to hug her, she jerked away from him.
"What are you doing?" Minerva demanded, her voice turning harsh and her eyes changing from their previous blue to a wary green.
"Hey, calm down," he said amicably, stuffing his hands in his pockets instead and trying not to appear disappointed. "Jeez, I was just gonna give you a hug. You looked like you needed one."
She blinked slowly and did not relax. "A hug?" she asked.
The redhead was shocked. "You mean you don't know what it is?"
She shook her head.
"Well, uh... can I show you?"
"It is not some sort of punishment?" she asked cautiously.
"No, no, it's a good thing, Min. Besides, you didn't do anything wrong."
"But I..."
Reno grinned and shook his head. "Hey, I don't care if you don't answer my questions. Your secrets are none of my business. I'm just curious is all."
"...all right."
"So that's a yes? I can give you a hug?"
"I suppose so..."
"Cool," he said, stepping closer and wrapping his arms around her. "This is a hug," he explained. He pulled back slightly and looked up at her. "Only, you've gotta hug me back, see?"
Minerva shook her head in confusion. "Why? What is the purpose?"
"I dunno," Reno said as he stepped back. "It just feels good. Comforting, maybe? I mean, me, I do it 'cause I like girls."
"So you only hug girls?"
"Well, I do, but that's 'cause I'm a guy and I'm not really interested in getting close to other guys without copious amounts of alcohol involved." When she only regarded him blankly, he tried again. "I mean, it's a sign of affection, right? Friends hug their friends, sisters hug their brothers, guys hug their girls, mothers hug their kids, et cetera, et cetera."
"Mothers hug their kids," Minerva echoed, then turned away. "Mine never did."
"That sucks," Reno stated eloquently. "And now she's dead..."
"You pity me for it," she said flatly. "You shouldn't bother. I never cared about her."
He hesitated. Normally, comforting a girl would be a cinch, but Minerva wasn't a normal girl, and if he treated her like one, she'd only resent him for it. "Minerva," he began.
"I know what you are going to say, and I am going to ask you not to say it."
"But I--"
"I don't want to hear it," she snapped, still not turning around.
Reno was beginning to get a little frustrated. He took her by the shoulder and pulled her around to face him. "I don't like people telling me to can it," he said, "so you're gonna listen, whether you like it or not." So much for comforting her.
Minerva frowned, her eyes going to his hand on her shoulder.
"You shouldn't lie to yourself," he told her. "If you didn't care about your mom, you wouldn't've brought her up. You're upset that she died; don't think I can't tell."
The silver-haired girl still did not reply.
"But you've gotta understand something," Reno went on, trying not to feel like an idiot. He hadn't even known Talya. "She was a Turk, right? Sure, we aren't supposed to care, but sometimes we do anyway. We just don't have a clue how to show it."
"You seem to know how," she pointed out.
"Me?" he scoffed. "I just learned some tricks to pick up girls. Doesn't mean I'm any good at the real thing. This Talya lady, she spent all her time in Hojo's lab, and there ain't much to learn there. So what if she didn't hug you and kiss you on the cheek like most moms do? She must've tried something."
Minerva looked at him, and he almost expected her to ask what a kiss was. "She probably hugged Sephiroth sometimes," she said.
Reno blinked in surprise. "Huh? Sephiroth?" She only nodded, and he frowned, trying to figure this out. "So, what? You're jealous 'cause your mom cared more about Sephiroth than she cared about you?"
"You do not understand," she stated. "I am merely pointing out that she was capable of affection. She was capable of showing me something, but she did not care about my existence, nor I about hers. And I do not care about affection. It does not matter to me."
"That's a lie," he said simply.
There was very little blue left in those narrowing eyes, he noted. He wondered if it meant she was angry with him. "Are you implying that I want to be loved? That I am weak?"
Reno shook his head. "Yes to the first, no to the second. Two different things, Min. Wanting love doesn't make you weak. Hell, everyone needs it. You're strong 'cause you've managed to last so long without it. Aren't many people who can do that."
"But I am different from them. I do not need it, so it is a weakness to desire it."
"Nah, you're not so different."
Minerva's eyes flickered before settling on a pure green. Those pretty eyes could be so expressive, if only he knew how to read them. "What do you mean?" she asked guardedly.
There was a small cluster of crates huddled against the side of a nearby shop, the last in the line of them, and he pulled himself up onto one of them. "Well... you don't look or sound any different." He grinned as he added, "You don't feel any different either."
She did not smile, and he wondered what it would take to make her. "That does not make me the same."
"I know. I mean, there's more to it than that. You have feelings, too, just like the rest of us, whether you want to admit it or not. You're guilty about fighting us, aren't you?"
"Yes."
He was surprised she even answered, let alone admitted it. "See?"
"That does not prove anything."
"Well, you've gotta have other emotions besides that. That's just one of the bad ones. The problem is, you haven't had the chance to feel the better ones." He gestured to the crate beside him, inviting her to sit down. To his greater surprise, she sat.
"Why do you even bother?" she asked him.
"'cause I like you."
Minerva blinked. "Why?"
"Because you're you."
"Why does that merit liking?"
Reno frowned, not really knowing how to answer that. Nobody ever had ever asked him such a question before. "Um... I dunno, really."
Minerva was studying him intently. "I know why I like you."
"Wh... what?" he stammered, turning to stare at her incredulously. Here he'd been thinking that she just barely tolerated his presence.
"You do not lie to me. You treat me the same as anyone else." She paused and shook her head. "Better, perhaps, for I've seen how hard you are on your friends. You have been very kind to me, and patient though I know so little about this world of yours."
Reno ran a hand through his hair, grinning in embarrassment. "Jeez... Most people just call me a drunken womanizer or a bastard."
"Womanizer?"
"Um. A guy who goes after girls so he can have sex with 'em, basically."
"...oh."
He shifted uneasily, for the first time bothered by this reputation of his. "But that's not what I'm trying to do now," he said.
"I know," she replied.
"So, uh... what were we talking about?"
"You were going to tell me why you like me." Her eyes remained on his face, an unreadable blue-green.
Reno looked down, avoiding her gaze. "Oh. Right."
"You haven't any idea, have you?"
He shrugged in surrender. "Not really."
Minerva stood, and he thought that maybe, just maybe, she smiled a little. "Perhaps I should leave you to think about it. Aloud I may deny certain things, but in my mind I cannot, and I have reasons for everything. Nosce te ipsum."
"Huh?"
"Know yourself."
"Oh." He pushed back his hair and grinned sheepishly. "I'm an idiot, aren't I?"
She shook her head. "No. Many brilliant people hardly know themselves. Sephiroth, for instance, has only just begun to understand himself."
"With Aeris's help," Reno pointed out.
Minerva did not acknowledge the comment and strode off without another word. Reno watched her go with a frown.
Know yourself, huh?
Author's Notes
First off, the title "Nosce Te Ipsum" is brought to you by Sluggy Freelance's Fire and Rain arc. It's funny where I get my Latin references from. I've taken four years of the language now, but my references always seem to come from elsewhere. Minerva's name, for example, came not from any knowledge of Roman mythology, but from a type of armor you can pick up in FF7 called the Minerva Band. >>; I only learned of the name's real significance after the fact, and it's surprising how appropriate it was.
Anyway, rather lengthy Reno/Minerva scene. They're fun to stick together, too. So much so that I never had the least bit of trouble writing them. Stick them in the same scene and bang, five pages are done and it only took me an hour.