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Chapter 7 - Confessions

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As they walked down the hall, to their lockers, to prepare for their next class, Yukari looked over to her friend and decided to let out some of her concerns in a some what, casual manner. "So, you seem to really like Allen. Am I right?" Her eyes then went back to focusing on the tiled floor, while Amano's words swam yet again in her head. It was like a plague, as they rang through her conscious. Why would he place such ideas in her mind about her best friend's relationship with the tall blonde male? And what was Amano's relationship to Allen?

Yukari recalled the last conversation with her beau. It was a rather strange one, in that Amano seemed to defend Allen to some extent. It felt like Amano was hiding something from her, as she could clearly see the concern that seeped through Amano's face when mentioning both, Hitomi and Allen. She had tried to get him to open up some of these feelings that lurked inside of him but he shunned all her efforts.

With sincerity in her voice, Hitomi replied as best as she could as she opened her locker. "I don't really know. It's too early to tell, considering we've only been out a couple of times." Her mind argued with her almost immediately. 'I have no feelings for him whatsoever. Actually I don't think that's true. I'm starting to see a very different side to him, as of lately and to be honest, it's a really nice side of him.

"So you're going to the dance with him, tomorrow?" Yukari inquired slowly, not wanting to upset Hitomi in the slightest at this point, especially in Hitomi's current state, she seemed different and different in a good way.

"Yep." The green orbed girl replied with a sigh and a smile. Hitomi didn't really want to discuss her relationship with Allen, as she didn't quite understand it herself. What Hitomi did know, was that her relationship with the blonde male had changed dramatically from their first date. It was really strange.

"If you think so Hitomi," Yukari replied with an exasperated tone as she slammed her locker and moved onto her next class. "Something's wrong here. I can just feel it. I have to find out but I don't want to jeopardise my relationship with Amano and I've got a feeling… he's the one who may have all the answers."

Strangely, that conversation stuck with the red head throughout the entire day, regardless of the fact that it seemed so insignificant.

As he entered the classroom, Van instantly found himself in the presence of chattering girls, who continued to rant whilst he stood in their attendance. He had left the room briefly to tend to a dilemma that his fellow staff member, Gaddess, was in. However, when he returned, he found his students blabbering away about their obscenities and trivial nonsense.

However, through the corner of his eye, he observed a rather tranquil and serene scene involving his most gifted student. The girl who had captured his eye and was very likely to become the valedictorian of her class: was just sitting there peacefully, writing away in that mystifying book of hers, once again. The raven haired man couldn't help but think of a flower that was surrounded by a pot of dirt. The dirt was obviously the rest of his pitiful class and Hitomi being the beautiful flower that rose above them, blossoming within the small and pathetic pot.

A suppressed smile emerged upon the young tutor's face as the metaphor that he had deliberated within his own self conscious, struck through his head and stuck inside into the depths of his heart.

A soft clearing of Van's throat was all that it took to catch the attention of the class. Judging from their teacher's appearance, the girls soon realized that he wasn't all too pleased with their behaviour, while he was absent from the room.

"Since you've all had an opportunity to converse during my short absence, I'll give you an opportunity to do something productive," he spoke strongly and clearly. "I want each of you to write a poem, right now, spontaneously. We'll even read some aloud afterward to make the situation more… entertaining. The poem can be about anything, anything at all. If you have trouble thinking of a subject, write about your dreams or things that are happening in your lives that may be affecting you."

There was a collection of groans from the class, which gradually ceased into silence as they observed their educator's grim expression. He was indeed no pushover as they had originally assumed. When Mr. Fanel expected first-class results and his expectations were not met, the young male would do everything in his capable doing to make sure his targets would be achieved for his next set of results. The outcome was rather rewarding for the raven haired youth, however the students were not so keen on his ludicrous workload. Nevertheless, when it came down to it, the pupils had realized that Mr. Fanel's laborious and constructive interventions had showed them a light into the future path of success.

Upon hearing the task bestowed upon the class, Hitomi immediately bent over her notebook. Her heart pounded rapidly as her pen scribbled down the lines that rang through her head effortlessly. A chill of excitement ran through her body as the emerald eyed girl read over the words mentally.

'Throughout my life,

Many lessons I've learned

Don't play with fire

Or else you'll get burned,

But the flame is hot

And full of desire

My curiosity is sparked,

By the flames of the fire.

The flames kiss my lips

Yet they don't burn.

I get a taste of the feeling

For which I yearn.

I take a step closer

So I can feel the heat.

I know if I'm not careful

It will knock me off my feet.

The flames slowly surround me

All I can do is give in.

This pleasure so great,

This must be a sin.

Now I'm addicted to fire,

I crave more and more.

Its sensual nature

I could never ignore.'

Her mind pondered as the words that seemed so natural, now seemed to sound so inappropriate. 'I can't read this out,' the rational component of her mind beckoned at her. Thoughts of Allen dangerously entered her mind. 'I don't get him. On our first date, he acted like the average jock but after that he's become so different. Why?' Hitomi rubbed her forehead as thoughts of her last date with the tall blonde male intruded her mind.

Flashback

"So Hitomi, what type of music, you into?" he asked politely as they sat there in the cute Italian restaurant.

She reacted with a blush whilst skimming her fingers over the chequered tablecloth, "Nothing you'd be interested in."

A smile was his reply, along with his left eyebrow raising. "Why don't you try me?"

"Classical," her answer was short but sweet.

"Which classical artists do you like in particular?" He inquired as he took a sip of sparkling water.

"Um… Bach, Handel, Rossini…."

"They are all obviously great artists but don't you think some of the new age artists like Vanessa Mae, Bond, Lara St. John and Paul Mounsey deserve some sort of recognition." He interrupted her. "The ones you mention in my opinion, are the norm and don't get me wrong there is nothing wrong with going with the norm but isn't it exciting to listen to sounds, that are a little daring."

"I didn't realise you liked classical music," her eyes fixated onto his.

"I like a lot of music types, I don't like to narrow myself to one category because if you don't experience all types, you won't know if you're missing out on something and therefore living a rather sheltered life. Don't you think?"

"I never thought of it like that," she then rested her right arm on the table. She then heard him mutter something under his breath but the strange thing was, she knew that whatever he muttered wasn't a bad thing. She smiled at him. "So tell me about your family?"

His initial reaction was a large intake of air. "What do you want to know?"

"Um… do you have any brothers or sisters?" she blurted casually.

Now, this is where Hitomi found Allen to be partially interesting. His facial expression seemed rather pained and his normally confident eyes were now insecure and staring at the ground. It was clear he was struggling to regain his composure but eventually he did. "I have a 5 year old brother, his name's Baralai, he's really cute."

Hitomi was amazed at Allen's genuine smile. It was so beautiful and innocent. It was nothing like the arrogant, narcissistic smile she was accustomed to at school. This personality he was showing her now was completely different to what she was expecting from him.

"Baralai…he's so smart and he's always asking questions." Allen ranted cheerfully. Hitomi couldn't help but to smile with him. That smile that seemed to set her heart, alight. She continued to let Allen go on about his brother until she decided she needed to ask him that question, that question that was itching at the edge of her mind.

"Allen, please don't take any offence from this but why were you so different on our first date. Why did you act that way?"

"That's easy Hitomi, I acted the way you were expecting me to be," Allen replied without hesitation. "As Eminem says and I quote, 'I am whatever you say I am'"

Hitomi couldn't help but to amazed at Allen's wit. "But I never said anything or expected anything."

"Oh, but did you Hitomi?" He took another sip of water. "I suppose I am to blame as well, as your expectations of me are due to the way, I portray myself to others."

End of flashback

'He's a really smart guy but why does he act the way he does,' Hitomi frowned and looked up from her desk to where Mr. Fanel was seated, dwelling over his own work. The student watched on, compelled as she once was when she had caught him playing the violin magnificently, as if it was an intrinsic action of his. His soft yet thick eyelashes fluttered as he read over the words below him. His dark hair tousled back behind her ears, sleek as a crow, while his soft luscious pink lips parted slightly while he read the words to himself.

Hitomi felt her cheeks begin to heat up as her insides started to note Mr. Fanel's physical appearance and mannerisms. Suddenly, his eyes shot upwards to view the classroom without making a single movement of his head.

The girl instantly focused her attention back to her poem, which was in dire need of a complete transformation. 'What's wrong with me?' This simple question seemed to be very popular lately, as she had found herself asking this over and over again through the past week. 'It's probably this whole Allen dilemma.'

"Stella," his strong masculine voice spoke. "I want much less of your senseless banter and more productivity in your creativity."

A chuckle escaped her lips which she desperately tried to maintain upon his comment to her fellow peer. His chocolate brown eyes then met with hers.

"Hitomi, what is it that you find ever so amusing?" his questioned with hint of annoyance.

"It's nothing. I'm sorry," her eyes quickly transfixed back onto the paper that was beneath her.

Van let out a strong sigh and continued on with the work at hand. 'The female species were always a strange bunch.'

After a few moments of silence, Van stood up from his desk and spoke. "Anyway girls, lets here some of your poems," his said in an exasperated voice. "Any volunteers?"

He looked around hoping that someone would muster up the strength to volunteer but alas he had no such luck. "Great, when I want to speak up, you don't and when I don't want you to speak, you do. I think we have a communication problem here and I think it involves you girls not listening. Come on, one of you volunteer!"

The girls sat there speechless and none of them dared to move. "That's it. I'm choosing." He looked around at the girls. "Well Stella, you seem to have a lot to say but I won't risk it today."

Giggles were their response to his comment. "Calm down girls. Let's see…Hitomi"

Hitomi looked up with a rather frightened look on her face. Van was shocked by her appearance; she seemed rather troubled by something. "Mr. Fanel, please can I be excused from this. I don't think I can read this."

"No, Miss Kanzaki. I'm sure whatever you've written is fine," his voice was cold and stern.

The petit brunette could feel butterflies in her stomach and her heart beating rapidly. She was so frightened that her arms started to tremble.

Yukari looked over to her best friend with great concern and before Yukari knew it, she was standing up. "Mr. Fanel. I volunteer to read my poem."

Van hesitated for a moment as he realised what Yukari was doing and within a moment he replied. "Well, let's hear it Yukari."

The cigarette fell to the ground as the other individual walked into the vicinity that the two where to assemble at. The old abandoned playground. Their eyes locked with each other for a moment before the silence was broken.

"What happened to you, Allen?" The brunette questioned leaning back into the wall. "You used to be the top student, and now you're nothing but a waste of space."

The young blonde clicked his tongue as he chose to ignore those words. But he knew… that Amano saw past his façade. He saw the pain stricken young boy within him… but Amano sort of knew the full extent to Allen's anguish but he wasn't sure. They used to be best friends…they still were…confidentially. The blonde would still confide in the brunette when it was essential, but Amano knew that Allen was still holding back from him.

"Let's cut the routine crap," Allen ran a hand through his blonde locks. "What do you want?"

"I want you to leave Hitomi alone," Amano blurted instantly. "She's a vulnerable girl who doesn't need to be jerked around."

"Interesting requirement," the blonde muttered, his face expressed that he was in deep thought and then he came out of it. "Hurry up. I need to pick Baralai up and before I see him I need to freshen up. I don't want him to see me in this state."

"Allen, your pride and joy is that little boy," Amano smirked. "Shame, since I remember a time you were once like him."

If looks could kill, then Allen would have killed Amano. Allen then managed to maintain himself. Amano then decided to test the waters. Allen had once confided in him a certain secret, one which Amano would take to his grave. That secret… which had caused the blonde's world to turn upside down.

Once before, the blonde had the most potential out of anyone to become Valedictorian. Allen was in a class on his own, one which was easily superior to the one Hitomi currently had.

"Allen, I know what you do to girls and I condemn your behaviour…" Amano started until he was interrupted.

"I never raped her," Allen cried to his defence with a hoarse voice. "You still believe I raped her. I didn'tI'm not that sort of person and it was even proven in court. I would never do that."

"I know you didn't. You were with me that night, remember? I'm talking about that playboy attitude you have for women," Amano quickly cut in, slightly surprised by Allen's outburst. The blonde had many female admirers, and one certain female was not too happy being tossed aside. In an act of revenge, she had tried to insinuate that Allen had raped her, which was proven false.

"Look, I'm not going to make a move on her," Allen said in almost disgusted voice. He searched frantically in his pockets for a cigarette but gave up after a moment or two.

"Then… what the hell are you doing with her?" Amano asked, puzzled by the blonde's recent behaviour. 'Please don't confirm my suspicions.'

After hesitating for a moment, Allen spoke, clearly thinking of what to say. "I didn't think she'd accept."

"You didn't think she's say yes?" The sentence clearly made no sense as Amano could not understand… but the male had his suspicions, which he hoped would deem false.

"I didn't think she'd go out with me. She's out of my league, so smart… It sometimes sickens me to even look at her," the blonde started rambling. "So I continued with the act, pretended to like her the way I liked… the others. I acted as she would have expected me to. I didn't think she would like that. But when I'm with her, the old me, appears. It's nice."

"Allen," Amano started to walk towards the blonde. "Has this got anything to do with that secret you told me before you changed?"

Allen took a moment before replying. "She's lucky that she looks nothing like him." His emotions were starting to affect his thought processes, causing the barriers to finally come down. "Amano…"

The male couldn't bear to finish his sentence. Amano took a few more steps towards him; his mind started to piece together his friend's words. Allen was never like this. He was always so confident, even if the rest of his personality changed.

Realization finally dawned on the brunette as he tried to get Allen to give him an answer. "Please answer the question I asked?"

"Yes," he nodded bleakly, as his eyes filled with liquid.

"My God Allen, What have you done?" Amano gently squeezed his shoulder.

"You know when I look at her I see a lot of the old me and I resented her for that," Allen began in a voice that was barely obtainable, tears he struggled to hold back. "But I got to know her she's so…smart and nice and a little opinionated."

Allen smiled as he talked about the green eyed girl. A soft chuckle pursued his lips before he started to speak again. "I guess we truly are from the same gene pool."

"A little weird, don't you think!" Amano sighed. "How long have you known?"

"Oh, I found out Mr. Kanzaki is my real father just before the summer holidays started," The boy's voice was slightly harsh. "I wish mom would have just answered the question when I asked who my real father was all those years ago."

"Allen, you should have told me," Amano cried, a sense of guilt panged at his heart. "I would have been there for you. How did you find out?" 'I should have known something was wrong.'

"I had to go to a party and as normal I had to stick to Baralai like glue or else you know. he cries around strangers," Allen started. "Well I felt these eyes watching over me, at first I thought I was being paranoid but then Baralai noticed as well. Then I saw him. He tried to talk to me. I look like him… a lot."

"But why go out with Hitomi? She's your sister," Amano spoke repulsion clearly shown upon his face. "You could have handled this…in a better manner."

"I panicked," he managed to splutter. "I'd never spoken to her before. I just wanted to… get to know her and when I first approached her, my Mr. Hyde side decided to come out."

"Allen, you've really made a mess out this situation," his maroon brows knitted together.

"I know," he banged the back of his head against the wall. "And I know I'm doing things wrong but I can't tell her. I'll sort things out. But seriously I can't tell her. I'm not ruining her life like they did mine. She's got so much going for but she needs confidence and I'll make sure she gets it. I'll make sure no one upsets her or pushes her around."

Amano felt that his feet could melt into the ground in that very moment. 'Poor, Hitomi. You should have told me about this earlier, Allen. You really care for her, don't you, you dolt.' Those were his last thoughts before he attended to his friend who was in dire need of his attention as he knew the blonde need to calm himself before he picked up little Baralai.

Hitomi had finally managed to tuck the twins into bed. It had been a rather tiresome challenge but she eventually succeeded. She yawned as she made her way down the stairs. She then pasted the hallway and moved on into the kitchen. Her stomach had been growling, a few minutes ago and she knew she needed food to regain her energy. The energy she had lost from chasing Dilandau.

She giggled for a moment to herself and then started to make herself a sandwich. Placing the lettuce and cheese, into the bread slices as carefully, as she could. She was so entranced with making her sandwich that she didn't even notice that someone else had entered the kitchen.

"Hitomi,"

Hitomi stood deathly silent as she recognised the voice. "Mr. Fanel, when did you return?" She whispered and continued to put slices of tomato into the sandwich.

"About two minutes ago. Hitomi…Is everything okay?" Hitomi turned to face him.

"Yes, everything is," and she turned around to cut her sandwich into two.

"I read your poem," he hesitated. "It was wonderful. I didn't understand why you didn't want to read it out loud."

'Of course,' Hitomi thought. 'We had to hand in our poems. I wish I had time to change mine.'

"It was mediocre," she bit into the sandwich.

"What was your inspiration?" he abruptly asked. "It was rather daring… for you."

When she turned to face him again, his fears had been confirmed. Allen Shezar was going to be her downfall. Her smile was gentle and her eyes were warm. "Actually Allen said I was a little too safe and that I needed to open my mind to different things."

"Mr. Shezar said that," He rummaged his hand through his hair and then rested it under his chin. "Hitomi, just be careful around him." Before Hitomi could reply, Van let out a long sigh and walked out of the kitchen.

Hitomi watched him with a puzzled expression. 'Mr. Fanel…concerned. Well I don't blame him. He probably thinks Allen is going to bring my grades down. Teachers always are caring for their pupils.' She continued on eating her sandwich.

But Hitomi unconsciously knew she was lying to herself because that poem was indeed inspired by Allen… but was written for someone else.

Love Witch: Hello again, Hope you enjoyed. The rest of this talkback can be found in my bio. Love to here what've you've got say so review.

I got the poem from a site from the author VWDF.