Whispers in my head, words that were never said
By Diane Kelley
the events of this fic take place after the battle with Sephiroth at the end of the movie. It does contain spoilers, so if you have not yet seen the movie, consider yourself warned. Note:I do not own any of the characters in this fic. Square-enix do.
It's over, it's really over. Yeah, Kadaj made one last dive at me after his body was freed from Sephiroth's control, just as I knew he would. ..but now he is lying here in my arms, whispering "brother". I can feel the slowly faltering heartbeat against my arm, and suddenly am filled with a sense of what almost feels like remorse. Why I should feel remorse for killing one who is such a danger to this world I will never know, but it suddenly feels as if it is a CHILD, a dying child, I hold in my lap.
He's reaching up now as the rain starts falling. . .hitting his face in fat droplets that mix with his tears until you cannot tell one from another. He calls out "mother" in a choked whisper, and though I cannot hear the voice that seems to speak to him or know what it says, it seems to bring him peace as he nods in agreement with the words. That is the point at which the weakening thud under my arm finally stills, and with one more choked gasp he is seemingly lifted to his feet. His body begins to dissolve into fat green globules. ..he had given himself up to the lifestream. As I feel those soft drops of green strike against my face and blend with the rain, suddenly I know. THIS is Kadaj's gift to those whom he had hurt most. The children.
As I feel the taint in my blood begin to be lifted free and my strength returning, I watch the faces of delight on the children as they are similarly cured. Then, it comes. ..the treachery of the other two brothers in a single shot from Yazoo's gunblade, a last ditch attempt at taking me down with them. I fall to my knees, the pain that rips through me nearly unbearable, but I know I cannot fall this way. .not without being SURE that the last threat was gone as well. As they ask me to join them, to play with the others, I rush toward them, seeing the materia in their arms glow hot. I can FEEL the explosion which takes my life, stripping my flesh from my bones. . .soon after I hear the voice that Kadaj had heard as he was dying. I too call out "Kaasan" at first until I hear that gentle and oh so familiar giggle. It is then she says. "How many times have you called me that?" and I realize WHO it is. .Aeris, sweet, gentle Aeris who cared enough for this world and all in it to give up her life for it. Another voice, deeper but just as familiar asks her. "But isn't it nice to be needed?" Zack, who had been my friend for so many years is who that voice belonged to. Aeris replies "I don't need such a big child though." Before she turns to me and says. "How unfortunate, but your place is not here."
After that I am floating, for a long time it seems. .first a wolf comes to sniff at me before disappearing, then I feel hands on me, several sets. ..at first I swear that Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz are among that group, they seem to be almost SMILING as they lift my body up. Then, the glare fades, that white-hot lifestream glare, and it is Tifa and the others helping me back to my feet, inside that pond of lifestream and water mixed. I hold my hand out for Denzel to come into the water, I know it will cure him as it did me, the gift of he who had died still lingering in that water. Denzel's giggle as I splashed the water over his head drew a smile from me, one no one had seen in a long time. It is then the other children leap into the water, and as I look about the ring of smiling faces, those of my friends, and standing in the door inside that blinding white light, two other familiar faces. ..a voice saying "It's allright now". ..suddenly I know. "I'm home"
The End