Jackie: the Vampire Slayer

Starring:

Jackie Miller

Lee Miller

Jeff Kirk

Lisa Swanson

Marie Wilson

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Unclear Intentions

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"So, what's new your almighty watcher-ness?" Lisa said reaching into the bowl of popcorn on Jackie's lap. The twilight avengers sat in Marie's living room. Lisa, Jackie and Jeff on the couch, Lee on a chair and, Marie paced back and forth in front of them.

"Must you really trivialize this moment? We are all in dire danger!" Marie exclaimed annoyed. Lisa and Jackie exchanged a look for a moment before responding at the same time.

"Yes."

"The vampire Lee faced in the alley is very dangerous." Marie began pointedly ignoring Lisa and Jackie. "The name of the vampire is Anton. Originally in France he was called Anton le un avec un coeur de glace. It means 'Anton the one with a heart of ice.'We must be very careful of him, he is over a hundred years old and I believe, he has already killed one slayer."

Jackie almost chocked on her mouthful of popcorn.

"Why isn't Lee dead then?" Jackie asked as soon as she recovered..

"Yeah, he was clearly going after him." Lisa added.

"I'm not entirely sure about that." Marie admitted. "I'm believe that it's safe to assume that he wasn't attempting to feed. After all, like Jackie so eloquently put it, Lee isn't dead."

"Um... okay... I know this isn't really the point, but why is he called the one with the heart of ice?." Lisa asked.

"He is a cold-blooded murderer. That is why. He killed indiscriminately. Men women, Children. That is why!"

There was a deafening silence in the room. Suddenly Jeff broke it.

"Why is he here in the first place?" Jeff asked. "The most we've ever gotten are rogue fledges. Why is a hundred and something year old vampire here."

"That is what scares me the most. I believe that the hellmouth awakening is attracting all sorts of unsavory characters. I believe that if we ever do kill Anton, things won't get easier."

"If?" Asked Lee.

Marie sighed. She didn't now how to say it. How to say that Jackie might die facing this vampire. Jackie had never trained to fight some one so strong and experienced; and even if she started training her now, to better her odds of survival, what was to say that Anton wouldn't show up tomorrow and do away with her? There were no guarantees.

"This is going to be the beginning of a very unpleasant sermon." Marie began. She took a deep breath, then began to explain the worries going through her mind.

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"So he likes you?" Jeff asked Lee as they walked on patrol.

"I hate it when you do that Jeff." He referred to Jeff's telepathy.

"Why didn't you tell them?"

"Because, I don't need Jackie to baby sit me. I can take care of myself. Plus it's one less thing for her to worry about."

"You can cry if you need to. I know how worried you are." Lee gave Jeff a knowing smile but said, nor did anything.

A beat passed between them.

"You think he's sexy!" Jeff laughed.

"I do not-" Lee started, but then remembered who he was talking to. "It's the french accent." He admitted. "Doesn't mean I wont turn him into vamp dust."

"I won't tell anyone."

"Thank you." Lee muttered. "You know, you're lucky. If I was anyone else I would have beat you up for intruding into my personal space."

"I know. Oh, oh; and he did!" Jeff answered the un-asked question.

"Really? I thought so. He was being all weird and edgy. It was kind of annoying."

"You were right."

"I still don't see anything. Maybe we should head home?" Lee asked.

"Sure." Jeff turned around, but suddenly stopped. "Wait... I sense someone... some thing."

"What are they thinking?" Lee asked.

"I can't tell... It's some weird language... It sounds like random grunts... right behind that building." Jeff concentrated.

"I'll go check. You stay here." He ran off to the area Jeff had mentioned. He muttered the spell for the fireballs, charging them just in case. Slowly he looked around the other side of the building.

"GUUUAAARGH!"

The mouth had many, many, many long, sharp, pointy, gnashing, gnawing, slashing teeth. It was a very scary mouth. A very big scary mouth. Had it not been such a scary mouth it would have looked silly on such a small demon. But nonetheless it was a scary mouth. Lee felt a sharp pain in his cheek, and then in his butt.

"Lee!" Jeff yelled. Picking up the crossbow he shot the demon in the mouth. Or tried to except the demon spit up some gross green substance that coated the arrow and weighed it down, onto the ground. And there on the ground it dissolved.

"Lee get up!" Jeff yelled at a dazed Lee. Once again he tried the shooting an arrow at it. But it yielded the same results. A wood and demon goo soup on the ground.

The demon looked at Jeff and gnashed it's teeth. Then broke into a run after Jeff.

Subsequently Jeff screamed. Quite loudly and a little bit too high pitched to be manly, but it was okay. The demon was scary.

"Hey, freaky thing, why don't you try a bit of this!" Lee called after the creature who, upon hearing his voice, turned around and started to run towards Lee again. Lee just trhust an arm forward and threw a fireball.

It's raining goop!

Hallelujah!

It's raining goop!

Amen!

"I am not going to say it." Lee restrained himself.

"It needs to be said." Jeff said solemnly.

"But it's girly." Lee insisted.

Jeff quirked an eyebrow at him.

"EEEEEWWWW!" Lee sobbed.