Phoenix: Yes this had to happen at some point.
Crystal: You want us tell you what it is?
Phoenix: Well, HELL NO!
Crystal: YEAH! Oh God, we're finishing each other's sentences.
Phoenix: That's not as bad as you trying to make me do the whole chapter by myself! (DUN DUN DUUUUUUUNNN)
Crystal: I did know such thing!
Phoenix: How come I'm writing it and you're watching TV?
Crystal: Because you volunteered!
Phoenix: (Attacks Crystal. Camera blanks out)
Disvlaimer: We own Nothing. Really, Nothing's living at our house! He eats a lot of remotes……..mmmm, chicken….
A chapter like this had to happen
Our favorite little pathetic passive-aggressive group was walking around aimlessly. They were in their usual mood: A pissed off Kagome, a "down to earth" Inuyasha, a perverted Miroku, a bitch-slapping Sango, a hyper Shippo and a cute little Kirara think 'What the hell am I doing here?' Suddenly, they come across a big castle called: 'Ye Olde Insane Asylum'.
Right below that was written: 'I see you.'
"Odd," Kagome said, "There are no asylums in the Feudal Era."
"Kagome, what's an asylum?" Shippo asked.
Kagome was about to answer when two people came running towards them.
"What's an asylum you ask?" The tall one asked.
"It's a place where loony people go! WHEEEEEEEE!" The short one said.
Silence. Crickets chirp.
"Excuse Sheila, she had an overdose of medicine. I'm Lucille." The tall one said.
Sango asked cautiously. "Are you two patients?"
Sheila said. "Good heavens no! hehe no……"
"We work here!" Lucille said cheerfully.
"Who the runs this place?" Miroku asked
"THEM." Lucille and Sheila answered, shuddering and shivering.
Shippo asked. "Did it just get cold?"
Everyone ignored him.
Inuyasha said, annoyed. "Let's go. We have no business being here." He turned to leave.
Lucille and Sheila go right in front of him. "Once you come," Lucille said creepily, "You never leave."
A flash of light happened. And our heroes fainted.
A few hours later
"Ooooh my head," Kagome said, rubbing it, "Where am I?"
As soon as she said that, everyone woke up.
"Damnit Kagome, don't be so loud!" Inuyasha said.
"But-" Kagome started.
"You're shouting." Shippo said.
"But I'm not!" Kagome said, tearfully.
"EVERYONE SHUT UP!"
Everyone nearly jumped out of their skin. Shippo turned around and ended up seeing a fluffy boa thing.
"Sesshomaru, you're here too?" Kagome said.
"Not only me. Kikyo is here, too." He said.
"Where is she?" Inuyasha asked.
"I don't know. Naraku took her away."
"WHAT! Naraku's here too? Who else is here?" Miroku asked, looking around as if something would pop out at him. (That never would happen. (Shifty eyes))
"I don't know damnit! Get off my back!" Sesshomaru said. (Have you ever seen Sesshomaru swearing?)
Silence, again. But this time it was broken by the sound of the door opening and footsteps.
"Shippo, will you come with us?" A man in white asked gently. (Nooo! The horrible man in white!)
"Wh-who are you?" Shippo asked.
"I'll tell you later. Please come now." He asked again with more force in his voice.
"No!" Shippo said happily.
"Well, you don't have a choice." He said, with a twisted smile. With that said, the man in white, went up to Shippo and took him away. Kagome got a glimpse at the nametag, which said "Hi, I'm Bob! We'll have so much fun together."
"What do we do now?" Sango asked.
"We'll break down the door, of course." Inuyasha said, happily. (For once.)
"Don't bother trying, little brother. The room's bolted shut."
"I'm obviously stronger; I'll knock down the door with ease."
"Don't say I didn't warn you." Sesshomaru said, in an I-told-you-so voice.
Inuyasha scoffed." WIND SCAR!"
But the Wind Scar just bounced around the room, until it dissipated.
"Iron Reaver Soul Stealer! Damn, I broke a nail!" Inuyasha exclaimed, sucking on his finger.
"Told you so," Sesshomaru said, sticking out his tongue.
"At least I have a bone!" Inuyasha said, pulling one out of his haori.
"Where'd he get that?" Sango whispered to Miroku, who shrugged and pulled out some popcorn. "How am I supposed to know," The monk said, "Just sit back and enjoy the show."
But that was short-lived because Sesshomaru took Inuyasha's bone.
"Waaaah, Kagome! Make Sesshomaru give me back my bone!"
"He started it!" Sesshomaru said, also crying.
Everyone else just stared at the crying brothers.
"Miroku, have you ever seen them act like that?" Sango asked, whispering again.
"No. Kagome, have you?" Miroku asked.
But Kagome was trying to stop the brothers.
"Inuyasha, if you're not quiet I'll make sure you never have ramen again!"
That made Inuyasha shut up immediately. But Sesshomaru was a problem.
'What does Sesshomaru like?' Kagome thought, 'he loves his hair since it's super silky. Wait I forgot to do the chicken dance this morning! (These are Kagome thoughts, people. Doesn't everyone have a weird thought?) Well I can't do it here, everyone will be watching. And Sesshomaru won't shut up. No what does he like. His hair, his nails and his hair. There must be something I'm forgetting. Think, think think think. Ooooh strained a nerve. Did I wash my hair this morning? Hair care products! Sesshomaru loves hair care products. I think I know what to do!' (Oh wow she made a break through. (rolling eyes))
Kagome went to her bag and took out a bottle of shampoo. Sesshomaru, having a good sense of smell, perked up.
"Sesshomaru? Who wants shampoo?" Kagome said.
Sesshomaru ran up to her wagging his tail. (Now it's a tail)
"Fetch!" Kagome said, throwing the shampoo. Sesshomaru ran after the shampoo. He got the shampoo and ran back to Kagome.
"Err, good dog?" Kagome said.
With Shippo
Shippo walked in a room that looked somewhat like an interrogation room, except it wasn't one. There were a lot of tables, a chair on each side and all these people who were wearing white. Some were reading, others chatting or playing cards.
"Where am I?" Shippo asked Bob.
Bob said, "Shippo, you are a chosen one."
"What kind of chosen one?" Shippo asked, curiously.
"A man in white, in your case, boy." Bob said.
"Join us. Join us." Everyone said, chanting.
"Umm……. Okay! What do I do?" Shippo asked cheerily.
"First make patients insane, and then you treat them. If your patient runs away, THEY will do something." Someone said, shuddering and shivering.
"Did it just get cold?" Shippo asked.
Everyone ignored him.
The next day
"Hey everyone! They just posted who will be our doctors!" Inuyasha said, excitedly.
'I think the insanity got to him.' Kagome said, sweat dropping.
The list showed this (Oh my God, that rhymed:D):
Patient: Doctor
Kagome: Lucille
Sesshomaru: Jaken
Inuyasha: Jakotsu
Miroku: Bob
Sango: Sheila
Kikyo: Naraku
Footnote: While you were asleep, we put an electric shocker on your ankle so we can stay together forever!
Schedule: (A/N: If the schedule doesn't make sense IDFC!)
9:15: Breakfast
9:20: Therapy sessions
10:00: Arts and Crafts
10:30: Math
11:00: Science
11:30: Lunch
11:35: Recess
12:00: Nap time
3:00: Therapy sessions
5:00: Arts and Crafts
6:00: Music appreciation
7:00: Dinner (Special menu: Last week's dinner)
7:05: Quiet Reading
8:00 Bed time
(A/N: See what we meant by the schedule not making sense?)
"Who's Bob?" Miroku asked (Remember only Kagome saw the nametag.), "And how come I get a male doctor?"
"Bob is the man who took Shippo away, and who cares you stinkin' pervert!" Kagome said, a little pissed off.
"Jeez, it was just question. Don't get so pissed off. You're not the one who likes me." Miroku said, smiling.
"So? I have Jakutso. I KNOW he'll be hitting on me." Inuyasha said.
"You're not alone. I think Jaken likes me." Sesshomaru said, whispering the last part.
"What time is it?" Sango asked.
"It's- shit! It's 9:19! There's no time to eat!" Kagome said.
Everyone hurried to their first class: Arts and Crafts.
"Hello, hello hello." A man with one eyebrow said, "My name is Olaf, but you can call me daddy!"
All the students had the same thought. 'What the fuck?' (I believe that's the first time we used that word. Hmmmmmm)
Olaf 'daddy' went on, "Today we will be painting a banner that will say: 'Patients Wanted'! Everyone get a paintbrush and some paint and we will start the fun day!" Olaf went over to his desk and started plotting 'something'.
But someone was lurking in the shadows.
With Shippo (I didn't forget about him)
Shippo was lurking in the shadows, (Well that wasn't plotful) with Kirara.
"Give the paper to Kagome. I have a plan!" Shippo said happily.
Back to the Gang
Everyone was doing fine with the painting, except Inuyasha. Poor Inuyasha. He didn't know how to hold a paintbrush. Everyone tried to help. They really did. But they got to nowhere. So (sniff) he was sent to the Naughty Corner! ((bursts out sobbing) Inuyasha you're too good for the Naughty Corner! Or bad…….) Inuyasha ended up talking to himself.
"Why do I have to go to the Naughty Corner? Just because I can't hold a paintbrush, I'm sent here!" Inuyasha muttered.
"This place is REALLY getting into Inuyasha." Sango whispered to Kagome.
"Well anyone could hold a paintbrush if they believe! Inuya- OW!" Kagome screamed.
"I see you have been shocked. That's what you get for believing." Olaf said, snickering. (Persnickety! Um, what does that mean?) Little did he know, no one was paying attention because Kirara was with Kagome.
"Kirara! Where were you? Ooooh a note!" Kagome said. (Okay, perky moment)
And the note said this:
I know a way out:D Isn't that amazing? I know a way out! Use the backdoor marked EXIT. But you'll need a distraction. Give Kikyo a beach ball and she'll pretend she's pregnant. Tell Olaf to call the ambulance and run to the backdoor. Good luck!
Shippo.
"Who taught Shippo the word pregnant? Miroku?" Kagome said, gritting her teeth.
But Miroku was already doing what the note said. He was giving Kikyo the ball, and she, being stupid, starting screaming "Call the ambulance I'm having a baby!"
Kagome thought 'Maybe I should give him credit since this is a VERY effective way to get out of here, and have Inuyasha!' Kagome grinned evilly.
"Kagome, why are you grinning evilly?" Inuyasha asked.
"Let's leave her alone. I don't want to know what she's thinking." Miroku said.
And so, our heroes (well Sesshomaru technically isn't but feh) ran away.
Later
"Please, I'm begging you I didn't know they were planning to escape!" Olaf said.
"And how was I supposed to know dead people can't get pregnant? It felt real so I thought it was real!"
"You workers have failed me for the last time!" A hooded person said.
Silence.
"SILENCE!" The other hooded person screamed.
"But-" Bob started.
"SILENCE! YOU SHALL PAY DEARLY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE! Koga get the chainsaw." The first hooded person said. (You had to know he'd be in the story.)
Koga brought the chainsaw, but noticed Naraku was there. "Can I kill Naraku? Please?"
"Sorry, but he was very naughty so we'll have to do it. But you can watch."
"Fine, I never get to do the killing." Koga muttered.
The chainsaw was turned on and it revved.
Halloween
Outside a certain someone's house there were lots of jack o' lanterns. But what's this? They weren't pumpkins!
Phoenix: Ahh finally finished.
Crystal: Yup it took days.
Phoenix: I was the one writing it. What are you talking about?
Crystal: It took days to finished eating the giant pixie stick.
Phoenix: You had a giant pixie stick! DIE (takes out bazooka and shoots at Crystal)
Crystal: Ah! (Runs away screaming, 'REVIEW')