Disclaimer: I, of course, do not own Gravitation, Murakami Maki has that honor.

AU My take on what might have happened if Shuichi had not managed to get there in time to save Reiji from Yuki. Manga Vol. 9.

animegirl12182--Thank you again for the review. You were the only one this time.
LEMON WARNING This Chapter

Found and Lost

Chapter 10

By the time his plane finally landed in New York, Tohma was feeling a keen sense of frustration. His plane had been delayed in Los Angeles for two hours for some sort of security problem. Everyone had been forced to remain inside of the plane until takeoff. Now that he had finally made it to New York he was anxious to get moving. He had made the decision on the plane that he would go after his child first. No one else would be going anywhere for a while and it was almost certain that Mika would run again. So destination one was Brooklyn General Hospital. Grabbing his overnight bag, he ran to hale a taxi.

Everything seemed to be conspiring against him lately and today was no exception. The traffic was horrible this morning and the trip to the hospital took over an hour. Tohma tossed the driver a US hundred dollar bill without even checking what the fare was and dashed into the hospital.

Once again he had to wait in line at the reception desk.When he faced the stern looking woman he had made the mistake of asking for Mika Seguchi and had to correct himself.

"I'm sorry, that would be Mika Williams now." He gritted his teeth at speaking the name.

:"I'm sorry sir," the woman didn't even bother to look up, "We did have a Michelle Williams but she and her daughter checked out a little over an hour ago."

Tohma was floored. Daughter, he had a daughter. Mika had given birth without him. What was worse he had missed her, she had already checked out.

"Excuse me sir," the receptionist had finally looked up at him, "If you would like to take a look there are pictures of the newborns for the past week on that board over there," the woman pointed to a pegboard across the hall, "it's the new arrivals wall."

Feeling defeated he strolled over to examine the photos. Nearly at the bottom of the board he found one photo labeled Anna Williams. Mika hadn't even given the baby his name.

"Goodbye Mika and Anna," Tohma whispered. She had gotten away again and there was no time to find her again nowhe had bigger things to do. He fully intended on coming back to Mika later. He carefully pulled the picture off of the board, clutched it to his chest, and left the hospital.

Ryuichi had actually enjoyed himself on his shopping trip. Now that he no longer had to worry about finding Shuichi he was able to really look around. And, since he had never been allowed into the city by himself before, he was enjoying his new freedom. He visited nearly every store and by the time he was ready to leave he understood why everyone had always been so cautious. He had spent a fortune and needed a caddy just to get everything out of the mall.

He bought himself a few new things including a huge cowboy hat, a box of crayons, drawing paper, a can of artificial snow, silly string, a lacy nighty, and five pounds of jelly beans. Most of his other purchases were for Shuichi.

The other singer had so few things when he arrived. There could not have been more that one change of clothes, besides the leathers. Ryuichi had tried to be picky and choose things that he thought Shu might like, but he couldn't resist buying some things that he wanted to see the other man wearing. If he was uncomfortable with the gifts, Shu could always pay him back later. But, he had really needed the clothes. Just as he was getting ready to leave he happened to think that Shu would probably need luggage to carry all of the stuff back so he bought that too.

Ryuichi grabbed a taxi and it took him and the driver several minutes to get everything packed into the car. The trunk and the backseat were both completely full. He had to ride up front with the cabbie. Once back at the hotel they had loaded a luggage trolley to the stuff in.

Everyone was supposed to be back in the hotel by 6:00 pm. Checking his watch, Ryu was delighted to see that it was only 4:45. He let out a giggle, he would have some time alone with Shu.

Only with a struggle did he finally manage to get the overloaded trolley into the elevator. At first he had gotten it stuck in the door on the way into their suite. He had been forced to climb over the pile to get out and then pull the trolley through. Since Shu didn't come out to see what all the noise was he assumed that he must be asleep. He unloaded everything in the sitting room, pushed the trolley back into the elevator, closed the door, and just left it sitting there.

He carried everything back into his room and quietly put things away. Sticking his new cowboy hat on his head, he crept into Shu's room to check on him. He had only taken on step into the room when he felt the cool metal of a gun pressed to his temple.

"Don't take another step."

He instantly froze and at the same time realized that he recognized the voice, "Dammit K, how many times I told you not to pull that gun on me?"

K grabbed him by the arm and tugged him back out of the room. The man looked furious. "I see that you found him Sakuma, now I want you to tell me just what you plan on doing with him. How do you plan on keeping him alive?"

He roughly snatched his arm back. "K, don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" the gun was put back in its holster and Ryu felt some of the tension leave his body.

"It means that intend on protecting him." He shoved his hands into his pockets and tried to maintain a confident stare.

"And you think Seguchi wouldn't kill you too?" K looked amazed at his audacity.

"I've known Tohma a lot longer that you K and I know that he would not hesitate to kill me if I got in the way." He finally dropped his eyes to stare at his feet, "it doesn't matter how good of friends we were in the past, I know that he only thinks about Yuki now."

"So tell me what you really intend," K's voice had softened somewhat, "you can trust me when I say that I will help all that I can."

"I have a couple of options. The first and best choice is that I make Tohma see that Shuichi is no longer any sort of threat to Yuki. The second is to run with him, and I will run K."

His agent started to argue but they were interrupted by Shuichi coming out of the bedroom. His eyes were still sleepy looking and his hair was tussled. Ryu thought he looked absolutely adorable.

"Are you guys arguing about me?" the words were muffled because Shu was talking and yawning at the same time.

Giving K a defiant look he went over and wrapped Shu in his arms. Tilting his head up he gazed into the violet eyes for only a second before capturing the perfect lips in another kiss. By the time he had finished he was supporting Shu's weight. With a smirk he turned back to K. "Do you understand now?" Before the blonde could say another word he scooped Shu into his arms and carried him back into his bedroom this time.

K had only a couple of minutes to digest what Sakuma had just said and done. 'What the hell was that all about?' he wondered, 'as if I didn't already know.' He was about ready to burst through the door to demand another explanation when Sakuma came back through.

This was the mature Ryuichi he was dealing with right now and he wanted him off guard. He asked the one question he knew would lower the other man's defenses. "Where is Kumagorou?"

"I've had to put him away for a while." It was true the pink bunny was nowhere in sight, "don't worry K. He'll be back." The man gave him a big grin.

Actually taking step back and getting a good look at Ryuichi's face he realized that his initial assessment was wrong. This was not the mature Ryuichi that he had known in the past. This was someone else altogether. The man before him now actually even looked 'different' or maybe slightly altered would be a better description. There was a certain maturity to his face and determination. His alarm must have shown on his face. "What's happened to you Sakuma? You have changed all of a sudden."

"Let's just say that I finally discovered that not all of life is a fairy tale and you can't always have the happy ending you want."

"Looks to me like you got something you wanted." He nodded towards the bedroom.

"You're wrong K he's not mine, not yet. There are still too many issues that need to be settled."

"Any fool can see that he wants you and you've wanted him since the moment you first saw him."

"Wanting is one thing loving in another. I intend on making him love me," the singer's voice dropped to a whisper, "as much as I love him."

"Ryuichi, I have seen this before you know. You cannot make someone love you."

"I'm not that stupid K, although sometimes I act like it. But, you saw for yourself, there is something there. I plan on working with that."

"Have you slept with him Sakuma?"

"No, I plan on waiting until he comes to me. Besides, Hiro beat me to it."

"Nakano! He slept with Nakano? And, you don't care?" He had to suppress the urge to strangle both men on the spot.

"Of course I care. But, Shu doesn't love Hiro, not in that way. It was more of a comfort thing although Hiro might feel differently." Sakuma was also speaking to him in a tone of voice he had never heard before, " we have already had all this out K. Everything might not be fully settled but at least everyone knows where the other stands."

Finally accepting this new version of Sakuma he sighed and took a seat. "The way I see it you have several major problems and their names are Hiro and Yuki. And, have you forgotten Tatsuha?"

"Tatsuha and I broke up last night and I'm afraid that Hiro will have to deal with his own problems." Sakuma came to kneel in front of him, "that does leave Yuki. As far as I'm concerned, Yuki is the only real problem."

Sakuma got back to his feet and started back towards the bedroom. "I do have one more question. Why don't you let Shindou come out and speak for himself?"

"Because he almost ran again earlier due to Hiro and Tatsuha fighting, he really can't take too much stress right now. And, I intend on protecting him, even from you."

Sakuma's words echoed in his head as the man exited the room.

WhenRyuichi pulled open the door he found Shuichi standing there staring at him wide eyed.

"I was going to come back out, but I couldn't, I heard what you said and I couldn't move. Is it true?"

"I'd ask which part you meant but I don't need to. Everything I said was true."

"You would give up everything and go with me, if we have to?"

"Consider it a threat, if you decide to run again I'm going with you. If you go without me then know that the entire time you are gone I will do nothing but search. So please promise that you won't run, not from me."

Shuichi took a step forward and reached out his arms, "Just hold me for a few minutes Ryu."

Shu snuggled his head onto his shoulder as he pulled him close, "I'm not even going to try to promise much right now. But, I will agree not to run again, not from you." The younger singer pulled back enough to look him in the eyes, "And, you're right, there is something between us. I can't tell you if it's love right now. I'm sorry, things are still too confused. I am glad that you are willing to wait."

Tatsuha and Hiro arrived back at the hotel room only to find K standing guard.

"Can't you ever leave us alone?" Hiro demanded at the same time he spoke, "I suppose you already know?"

The American grinned, "Just protecting my interests. It is my job to ensure that everyone gets where they need to be. I came to make sure that you and Nakano make it to the trial and that Sakuma makes it back to Japan by Wednesday for his concert." The grin slid off of the man's face and a serious look replaced it, "And, yes I have seen Shindou, and no I don't know what I'm going to do about it yet."

"Where is he then?" Hiro asked in a tired voice.

K pointed back to the bedroom he had been sharing with Ryuichi and Tatsuha felt his stomach turn. Afraid of what he might find he pushed into the room. What he saw when he entered was not what he had expected and feared, but somehow what he did find was even worse. Shuichi was sitting on the bed eating jelly beans and watching television, Ryuichi was lounging next to him, head on the other man's shoulder and Shuichi's arm was casually wrapped around Ryuichi's waist. It was a very cozy little scene.

"You two seem to have made yourselves right at home." He couldn't keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

Neither man jumped nor even seemed embarrassed and only Shuichi turned his head to look. "I suppose Hiro is back too?" He nodded in response. "Then why don't you all come in, K too, we need to talk."

Once every one was in the room K took the only chair, he and Hiro sat on the other bed. Ryuichi finally sat up straight but did not leave Shuichi's side. He must not have known what the other singer was going to say because he looked as interested as everyone else.

"First I do want to thank everyone for your efforts in trying to find and protect me. I have made a promise that I will not run without letting someone know first," Shuichi gave Ryu a sweet smile, "and I intend on keeping that promise. Also, I understand that Yuki's trial is Monday morning at 9:00 am and that there is a subpoena for me to testify, I intend on being there."

People's reactions were about what he expected. Ryuichi smiled at the news and nodded agreement, K looked determined, and Hiro immediately began to argue.

"Shu what are you thinking! You can't go. You could get yourself killed. You know that Seguchi will be there and if he sees you, he will probably kill you himself. And, I don't think you are anywhere near ready to face Yuki yet."

"Hiro, I understand your concern. I am going to trust K to protect me and to make the arrangements. I may not be ready to face Yuki but it is something that I need to do. I have put it off for months. There are a lot of things that I need to start facing up to." There was a maturity and determination that he had never seen when Shuichi had been his brother's lover.

"Are you really sure you want to do this? If you're sure, I won't fight any more." Hiro was sounding like the whiney one now.

Shuichi nodded his head and turned to K. "Now I need to you to do some things. First, telephone Yuki's attorney, Mr. Sugiama, I believe his name is, I have his number on a card sitting on the bedside table in the other bedroom. Just let him know that I will be at the trial but don't give him any other details. I do not want him to tell Yuki either. Secondly, I am leaving the security up to you and to ensure that you don't get out of line, I am pulling a punch. I don't think that I need to remind you of wife's involvement in past activities, yours also."

It was funny to see someone get the best of the overconfident blonde for once and K didn't seem too happy about it. "OK Shindou, I'll do it. I would have even without the blackmail."

"Then I will leave all of the arrangements to you. Oh! One more thing Winchester, please arrange the tickets for the trip back to Japan as soon as possible after the trial has ended. I want to go home."

"Now, since I am being so bossy tonight Tatsuha could you please go and get us some pizza? I'm starving." He received nods from Tatsuha and Hiro, "Oh! And, maybe Ryu can pick up some beer." The other singer gave him a surprised look probably wondering why he wanted him to leave also, but he did nod that he would go.

Before he left, Ryuichi leaned to whisper in his ear, "You need to talk to Hiro right?" Shu gave him a small smile and got his ear nipped in return. He had to suppress that shivers that sent down his spine.

Once Ryuichi had left the room he turned to see that Hiro was looking upset, "What do you need for me to do Shu?" his tone of voice showing that he was miffed.

He quickly went over to sit next to his friend, "Hiro I need for you to talk to me."

"What else is there to say Shu? You make love to me, you tell me you love me, and then partner off with Sakuma. You know that I love you. And, yes, I'm hurt. It hurt like hell seeing you and Sakuma so comfortable on the bed together." All of the anger seemed to drain out of his face at once and only pain remained. "Did you…sleep with him too?" There were tears standing in Hiro's eyes and Shu realized that had never seen him cry before.

"I know that are expecting to break down and apologize. I'm not going to Hiro, not this time. You've always known how I feel about you. I do love you and there are times that I wished things had turned out differently between us. But, the past is past and cannot be changed. I have grown to love you as the truest, deepest friend that anyone could ever have. My only excuse for my behavior this morning was that I had been so lonely for so long. I was scared and wanted security and comfort."

"You used me?" The anger was back on the red-head's face now.

"If you really think about it, you used me too. You knew how I felt and you knew how Ryuichi felt." Shuichi growled out his anger now matching what he was seeing on Hiro's face. "At the very least you took advantage."

"Yeah, I did take advantage. Can you blame me? I saw that as the only chance I'd ever have to get you to see me as something other that just a friend. The opportunity was there and took it. And, I enjoyed it. I will always hold it in my heart. You can't stop me from wishing." He tears had stopped and Hiro was looking at him with crooked smile.

"I will always remember too," Shu answered softly with a small smile of his own, "You know, they say never to sleep with your friends, it ruins the relationship. I don't want this to ruin what we had. I still want, no need, you as my friend Hiro. If you can forgive me, I can forgive you." He offered his hand and his friend took it and pulled him into a hug.

"I still love you Shu."

He relaxed a little onto Hiro's chest and sighed before pulling back, "I love you too Hiro."

In less than an hour Ryuichi and Tatsuha had returned with dinner. He and Hiro were sitting comfortably on the bed eating jelly beans. Tatsuha gave them both a deep scowl and couldn't resist a final jibe. "Now he's on my bed. I've never seen anyone do so much bed hopping as you Shindou!"
Mika and Alex checked into a hotel room just outside of Washington DC using the names Mr. and Mrs. Ted Northern. The place was a dive but no one asked any questions. Alex had borrowed his brother's car for the trip. The original plan had been for Mika to take a bus from here to Miami where she would be able to blend in and try to get a new identity. By the time they were checked into the hotel, Alex had changed his mind. There was no way he could leave Mika and Anna now.

He had known from the first minute that he had laid eyes on Mika that there was going to be something between the two of them. He feelings were too strong for him to just walk away.

"Alex," Mika's voice interrupted his thoughts, "I really do want to thank you for everything. You have done far more than out original bargain called for. The payment for the clinic is nowhere near enough to pay you back."

"You're right Mika, it's not." Alex knew he was taking a big risk here but couldn't just her walk away. "It's not enough, not anymore. It's not even what I want anymore. I want to stay with you and Anna. I don't care about the money for the clinic. I don't think I ever did."

"You want to stay with me?"

"With you and Anna, yes. I don't know where it will lead, but I want to give it a try. I like you Mika, I may even be falling in-love with you. I think I see things in you that you don't even see in yourself. I don't think that you have been able to live a good life. You've been surrounded by people who constantly take advantage of each other. I think you have forgotten who you really are. And, I think that with help from Anna and I, we can help you find yourself again." He allowed his arms to slip around her waist and gave her the briefest of hugs. "We can talk more about this later. Right now, I want you and Anna in bed."

After stuffing themselves with Pizza and getting pleasantly buzzed on the beer everyone decided on an early bedtime. Tatsuha decided to move into the other bedroom eventhough both Shuichi and Ryuichi had both agreed it wasn't necessary. After a small discussion the teenager went to get his things from the closet, only to find it packed full. "Wow! Ryu what did you do, buy out all the stores?"

The singer at least had the grace to blush, "They're for Shu."

"Oh great!" Tatsuha huffed, "you're going to make him as bad as you," before stalking out of the room.

Shuichi snuggled down into Tatsuha's old bed and he couldn't resist going over to give him a small kiss. "Goodnight Shu-chan." Ryuichi could tell Shu was already falling asleep and barely heard the low, "Night Ryu."

After lying in his own bed for several minutes, Ryuichi realized that sleep was not going to come easily. He badly wanted to go over and crawl into Shu's bed. He knew he couldn't do it though. That would be doing nearly the same thing that Hiro had done, with a bad result. After tossing and turning for nearly an hour he found himself on his side staring at the small curled up form on the other bed.

"Damn!" he cursed himself. If Shu wasn't so sensitive and seemed to melt anything he was touched. He really hoped this only happened with him. Imagining what Shu would be like in bed and found a certain area of his body getting very uncomfortable. There was no way he was ever going to be able to get any sleep without some relief.

As quietly as possible he began stroking himself through his shorts, thinking of the way Shu's bottom moved in those tight leather pants he wore. Groaning softly at the picture, he allowed his hand to slide into the loose boxers. He was as hard as he had ever been and nearly throbbing. His pace increased as he continued to picture the other singer draped over him. Eyes squeezed tightly shut he realized it wasn't going to be enough.

He was so wrapped up in his own fantasy he didn't even feel someone getting into the bed with him. His eyes flew open in shock when he felt another set of hands join his. "Shu!" he gasped out trying to cover himself and back away at the same time.

Shu just gave him a smile and placed a finger over his lips telling him to be silent before lowering his head to give a small lick over the tip of his now painful erection. His moan only brought another motion for silence. The dark head lowered again and began licking him from the base up. When Shu's hot mouth finally took him in there was no way he could control the moans now and didn't even try. Heaven and Hell all in one place, Shu's tongue and teeth were a delicious torment.

As his love began to gently bob his head, Ryu felt shivers all the way to his toes. Right now he really regretted Shu not having much hair, he would have loved to curl his fingers in raven locks as he plunged to the back of Shu's throat. A small hand was running up his thigh to press the sensitive area under his sack causing him to cry out fully as the waves of ecstasy rolled through his body. He felt himself finally reaching climax. The loss of Shu's warmth nearly made him lose his mind.

"Shu, please," his entire body was begging, "I'm hurting, don't stop now."

"Tell me what you want," Shu's voice was a seductive whisper.

He was already gasping for air and could barely speak, "Please want…need you in me. Make love to me Shuichi."

"Do you have anything, lube? I don't want to hurt you." For the first time he noticed that Shu was panting as well.

He pointed to the nightstand and watched as Shu reached for the strawberry flavored lube he had bought earlier today. He saw Shu's smile as he opened the tube and noticed the scent. With one hand still stroking him gently Shu warmed the gel before spreading it on himself.

"Please hurry Shu," he heard himself begging.

As many times as he and Yuki had made love, Yuki had never once offered himself. Ryuichi wanted him and badly. At first he was frightened, unsure of what to do. Once he was started everything seemed to come naturally.

As he grasped Ryu's erection and began gently stroking, his new lover raised his knees and spread his legs, not seeming at all embarrassed the way he would have been. Shu allowed his other hand to trace the cleft before pressing a finger into the tight opening. A gasp escaped the other singer's talented lips and Shu felt the muscles tighten at the pressure.

Shu continued his slow stroking until the muscles relaxed and Ryu began rocking against his hand. As soon as he added the second finger he began working until he found Ryu's prostate. A slight brush nearly caused him to arch off the bed. The small cries and whimpers coming from his idol's mouth were intoxicating.

He increased the pressure and pace of his strokes while inserting a third finger, instead of tensing, Ryu only pushed back onto his hand. "You're driving me crazy Shu, love me now please."

"Are you sure Ryu?" Shu asked pulling out his fingers.

"Aren't I begging enough? I want you so badly."

Ryu actually wrapped his legs around his waist and pulled him forward. Grasping his own hardness he began to press into the tight opening. Ryu used his legs to back onto him and Shu clearly heard the gasp of pain.

"Ryu," Shu himself had to gasp out trying to penetrate the passion controlled mind, "Let me control it, I don't want you to bleed." It was either his voice or the pain the finally got through and it seemed that Ryu's body relaxed all at once.

He started at a slow pace, enjoying each and every new sensation. The gentle rocking of Ryu's body was adding to his pleasure. He could feel Ryu shiver every time he hit his pleasure spot and tried to control the pace. He wanted this to last forever.

As the pace of their lovemaking increased he could now hear his own low moans. "Gods you feel so good Ryu. I've never felt anything so good." He knew he wasn't going to last much longer, the man was too tight and hot. It was Ryuichi who increased the pace again moaning loudly and another set of hands covered his increasing the pressure of his strokes.

"SHU!" his name was called in a gasp of breath and Ryu's entire body seemed to tighten and sticky warmth covered his hands. The feeling drove him over the edge and buried himself one last time allowing his own orgasm to consume him.

Ryuichi had enough presence of mind to catch his new lover before he fell, allowing his own legs to lower. Shu was still panting and staring him straight in the eyes.

"Don't pull out yet Shu," he panted out when his partner tried to move. He managed to work his way up onto Shu's lap without dislodging the now softening erection. Ryu took the beautiful face into his hands and kissed his love until he was breathless again.

"I need to tell you just how much I love you Shuichi. I have loved you since I first saw you. But, I don't want you to say anything, not until you mean it. Not until you mean it the right way."

Shuichi stared into the deep blue pools of Ryuichi's eyes and felt like he was falling into space. This was a place he could stay in and be happy forever. This wasn't the desperate obsessive need he felt with Yuki. This was a calm still pool where he would find peace and comfort. He gasped with the revelation.

Ryuichi was watching every emotion that passed across Shuichi's face. When Shu's eyes locked with his and he heard the small gasp, he that he finally had him.

"I…love…you Ryuichi," the voice was hesitant at first but he repeated with conviction, "I really do love you."

Only then did he allow Shu to pull out. Without a word of his own he pulled Shu into his arms and vowed never to let go."

Next Chapter: Ryo and Dee from Fake make an appearance.

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