Disclaimer: Don't own YYH, as usual…

Chapter 8: The Shock

Kuwabara, of course:

Is it just me, or is this girl really fat?

I mean, I'm supposed to be strong, at 7 feet tall, but this girl weighs a whole ton.

I feel kind of bad about knocking her out, though. It's like kicking someone when they're down. And that person was down. Her arms and legs were scratched, fractured, bruised, torn, and otherwise mauled. She looked like she'd been through a war.

But I guess my major problem now is people are staring at me. I would too. It looks like I've just killed her. And this Kara girl does look dead.

I turn her over while walking and study her. She's got medium looks, kind of resembling Keiko only with long hair. But the green tips don't suit her at all. That probably takes away from her facial value.

And why am I considering her looks, anyway? She is just a hostage.

Oh. There's the alley where Kurama should be.

I walk in, and find him. I've never seen him looking so freakishly ecstatic when he sees my parcel.

"You found her!"

"So it would seem."

"Lay her down."

"Why? Surely we aren't going to experiment on her, right?"

"No. I just need to see her to make sure."

"I already made sure. She's got that Rose Whip thing in her leg."

"Okay. Just lay her down anyway."

I grudgingly oblige.

He watches her with pride.

I'm silent for a moment. "Um, I don't suppose anyone is going to tell me why she's so important."

"Correct."

"WHY?"

"Because you can't be trusted to handle these kinds of things."

"WHAT? I CAN TOO!"

"You sound like a child. Shut up."

I'm taken instantly aback. Kurama was never like this before.

"All right, all right. But shouldn't we be going?"

He checks his watch. "Yes, you're probably right – for once. Pick her up and let's get out of here."

"No, you pick her up."

"PICK HER UP."

"NO, YOU pick her up."

"Why are you being difficult, Kuwabara?"

"Cuz she is so unbelievably heavy!"

"I'm not touching her. I can't. Just do it."

"Why can't you?"

"CUZ I CAN'T! JUST PICK HER UP, YOU APE!"

"Okay, okay…" I lift Miss Bowling Ball Butt in a piggyback position, and follow him out into the sunlight. Less people stare. That's good. Now it only looks like I'm taking her to the hospital.

After a few minutes of Kurama's speedwalk, I run to catch up, jostling Kara.

"You do know there isn't a portal for miles, right? And we can't exactly take a bus."

"I know! I know what I'm doing! Now will you hush?"

I mutter, and he ignores me. I rehoist my charge on my back. It's seriously like carrying a bag of bricks.

"Then what are we doing with her?"

I guess he's fed up. Now he's just ignoring me, with his nose in the air.

"Kurama, you are such a pain."

Silence.

"You think you're so cool."

Silence.

"Stupid pretty boy. You aren't even athletic! Your voice isn't deep!"

He spins around and glares at me. "Just where is this coming from?"

"You ignoring me!"

"Listen, you have to stop your whining. I need to focus on this mission, so I am being short. I apologize in advance for the beating I will undoubtedly do you if you don't shut up."

"What mission? We're capturing a filthy little street urchin!"

At this, Kurama snaps, and whirls around to look me in the eyes. "This – girl – is – the – most – important – thing – we – will – ever – find – in – our –lives."

"I don't suppose you're about to tell me why?"

"Correct."

Great, I'm right back where I started.

Oh well, maybe Yusuke will know something.

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Finally, after I'm ready to die, Kurama and I reach this shabby little shack far from town. It's actually very close to Kara's house, which we searched already. It's made of wood, and very cheap stuff. There's no windows, except for a lopsided mud-brown door, which we enter through.

"Are we stopping here?"

"Just do what I do!"

Ugh, he's cranky again. Better shut up. I don't want a taste of that Rose Whip. Frankly, I'm surprised it didn't snap this girl's leg in two. This heavy girl.

We enter, and I see no one is there.

"Perfect." Mutters Kurama.

"Where are we?"

"This little area Yukina made. Below this mess is our headquarters." He gestures around at the empty beer cans that litter the floor. "No human in their right mind would come and stay here. There's not even a piece of furniture. We'll meet Hiei here later."

"What do you mean, below? There's nothing to suggest anything's underneath."

"That's the idea, you oaf! We don't want anyone finding us, right?"

"I guess. But let's just get there."

Kurama crosses the room. From there he picks up the beer cans in a sequence. I notice that they are all lined up neatly on each side of the room. I see. He lifts one, puts it back, and goes for a random – or seemingly random – can on the other side. I wonder what he's doing.

Finally, he picks and sets the final one, and something dramatic happens.

The floor in between the cans suddenly turns on its side, dropping Kurama down miles.

Just before he falls, Kurama waves for me to come too.

He's crazy. Mad. The whole lot of the people I hang around. Koenma, Yusuke, Yukina, and whoever else. Oh yeah, Shorty. All completely insane. And I'm stupid enough to hang around 'em.

I walk over, wincing at Kara's weight, and look down. There's nothing but darkness. I guess I do have to jump.

It's like diving. Just like diving.

I hold my breath for no reason, probably just because of the diving analogy, and jump.

I fall for what seems like hours.

Then, with my spirit awareness picks up something radiating from my hostage.

Spirit Energy?

Suddenly, I hit the ground hard, totally breaking my concentration. I drop Kara somewhere before I hit. My god, if this keeps up, I'll look just like Kara when I get out of here. If I get out of here.

Something raps me hard over the head.

Oh. It's Hiei. I see the remains of his fire dragon uncoil Kara's still body and disappear, dropping her on the ground.

"Baka. What were you thinking, dropping it?" Kara is the 'it' here, I guess.

I stand up shakily, and start yelling. "YOU IDIOT! YOU SAVE THE GIRL AND LEAVE ME TO FALL AND BREAK MY NECK! AND WHAT'D YOU DO TO HER? BURN HER UP?"

"Shut it. You didn't break your neck because of the girl. Her energy cushioned you. And of course she isn't dead, she's just like she's always been! My dragon prevented her from breaking her neck."

"What energy of hers saved me? That couldn't have been Spirit Energy! And if she was doing all right on her own with her "powers" why did you need the dragon to help her out?"

"Just in case," he says evasively. "As for her energy – it might have been nothing at all. Who cares? Let's just go. And carry her."

"Oh, are you too delicate?"

"No, I just can't touch her. Like everyone else. That's why you were called into this."

"But – why can only I touch her?"

He's silent; he only walks on.

Damn, I wish I had a light.

I pick up the girl, and continue onward.

Hiei is quiet, like always. He only says that we are getting there every now and then, as if afraid I'm about to start complaining about how badly my feet hurt. I hate it how he looks down on me!

Oh well. Bitchy evil midgets will be bitchy evil midgets.

As I walk onward, I notice a faint beam of light. Good. That'll signal the end of the tunnel, or so I hope.

Again, getting off topic. Just focus on getting there. I grit my teeth and put on a spurt of speed, and I make it there faster than I thought I would.

Hiei is right behind me.

I look around at the room in front of me. It's like a hospital extension. Bright white everything. It makes my eyes hurt. It has a glass dome with a cushion in the center, as well as 3 desks and swivel chairs. The walls and floor are tiled in a bright white.

Hiei comes around behind me and watches me. "Well, this is where the ningen is staying."

"Why here?"

"Because we wanted you to ask such stupid questions." He says very sarcastically.

"It's not stupid! And it looks like a pediatric office!"

"Ooooh, big word."

"SHADDUP! I kinda imagined a dungeon, for obvious reasons. And where the hell is Kurama?"

"He'll come around soon. You don't need to know where he went, you buffoon. For now, just put her in that cage over there."

"Cage?"

"IDIOT. The CAGE."

"Oh." I see a glass box over in the far corner that I didn't notice before. "You mean the glass box?"

Hiei slaps his forehead in frustration. "I don't know, you tell me." He moves closer to it.

"Yes?"

"Wow, and that takes you to an IQ of 3 and a half! Get over here, and put her in!"

I walk over. "I don't see a door."

"Of course you don't. It's only visible to people who have an intelligence."

"Hiei, I'm warning you…"

"Or you'll what?" He asks coolly. "Here…" He goes over to a plate in the wall. The wall seems to be made up if these entirely immobile tiles.

But the one he touches with only a finger presses itself in with ease. It wriggles through the gap, and a panel just melts into place in its spot. I watch in amazement as Hiei types in a 6 letter code with the alphabet buttons, and then I finally see something happen in the cage. The front of it molds away, and as little as I know about science, I know that isn't supposed to happen. But then, anything can happen here, right? And what is with the melting stuff, anyway?

"Well, what's the matter?" Put her in!"

"All right, all right…" I take her off my back (whew!) and throw her in gently. I'm glad there's at least a cushion. I don't want her to be in any more pain than she already has been through.

As soon as she is in, the door melts back into its original spot.

Okay. Gotta pick my words carefully if I'm going to get any information.

"Is that it?"

"Yes."

"So…"

"So what?"

"Can I go now?"

"No."

"Why?"

"You might be needed later."

"Why?"

"Nothing a buffoon like you needs to know.

"Hiei, I won't ask anything too specific, as you seem to be mentally incapable of answering." I say nastily. "But how long is she staying here?"

"As long as necessary."

"Which is…" I wave my hands circularly.

"YOU IDIOT! What would be apparent to most ningen imbeciles just slips right by you! Jeez, you are so friggin' slow sometimes! Until someone from the Spirit World comes to pick us up, we stay here and monitor her behavior!"

I sigh. "And how long will it take for them to pick us up?"

"It'll be at least a few weeks to a month. The other hideout isn't safe as of now."

"Which means…Oh no. Oh NO!. I'm going to be stuck with you for at least a few weeks!"

The same thought seems to have struck Hiei. "No…no, this cannot be happening!" He uncharacteristically holds his head in his hands. He walks and sits down on a chair in front of a desk.

I crack my knuckles for show. Heh heh heh. I'll be able to squeeze every drop of information out of Shorty in a few weeks. Piece of cake.

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A/N That was kinda weird, I know, but review anyway!

And I wanted to know who wants to join the Kurama x Hiei Flame Club. I'm advertising for the author Jak Stark and his chairwoman RebelWriter. It's basically where you must flame any stories where Kurama and Hiei go way off the deep end, and have kids or something randomly weird like that. You can ask Jak Stark for details.