Clark's heart was racing from rage and anticipation. He gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles. Clark had always assumed he was safe from Lionel's evil games, but how could he been so stupid to think that? Of course he would be at the top of Lionel's list. Months ago he realized that Lionel was never going to let him go, that he was indeed Lionel's weakness, so why hadn't he seen this coming?
Clark knew... his emotions always found a way of blinding him. In the back of his mind, a nagging thought entered his mind. He was being blinded again. But he had to stop Lionel... he had to die. Clark was trying to mentally brace himself for what he had to inflict upon Lionel... not only for himself; but for every other life Lionel would destroy. But he couldn't do it. Clark had been at the climax of his anger when he left the farmhouse, and although he was still venting with anger, it was slowly calming inside of him, but not going away. No, it was all settling in him, clearing his thoughts.
Clark was Lionel's son, and he had learned so much from Lionel. Time to put that knowledge to use. Clark had no doubt that he could get away with Lionel's murder, especially without Lionel there, but he couldn't even bring himself, even in his mind, to pull the trigger. Clark knew if he killed Lionel he would become him, and wherever the thought came from, it reeked with truth.
But Clark had to stop him; there was no room for doubt.
Clark didn't know whether to feel relieved, scared, or happy that Lionel's car was parked in the garage. Clark quietly stepped out of his car and shut the door, as he made his way inside the mansion.
Without having to look, Clark knew Lionel was in his office. But Clark went to his room; though it was just a pit stop. Clark threw the clothes out of his closet, making room for him to see the safe in the back of the wall. With shaky hands, he punched in the code, and opened the safe, pulling out a gun.
Break my bones
Increase the pain
Piece By piece
Clark pulled out 2 bullets and loaded them into the gun. Two was all he needed. Clark was sitting on the floor, his back leaning against his bed. Clark mentally scolded himself, he was ready; why was he just sitting here? But he couldn't move... he was mentally preparing himself for what was going to happen.
He knew exactly what he was going to do... yet he felt so nervous that he was dangerously close to vomiting. What if he messed up and things went terribly wrong?
Clark couldn't help but over analyze everything in his mind. He wished he could see Lana and Lex before...
You break me
Pick up the cross
It's killing time
Clark took a deep breath as he stood up; gathering his strength, and putting on the cool façade he had used all his life, as he stepped outside his door. This was too important for his emotions to get in the way and for him to wreck everything. Clark held the gun tight within his hand, close to his hip.
Clark walked into Lionel's office, taking mental note of the security cameras that occupied the corners of the room. Lionel hadn't noticed Clark yet; he had his back turned. Clark reached in his pocket and speed dialed Lex's phone, and as soon as Lex picked up, Clark hung up. He sent a text message to Lex, just before discarding his phone.
"Clark, I didn't notice you there." Lionel carefully surveyed Clark.
Clark didn't say anything, not yet.
"What are you-" Lionel's eyes caught sight of the gun in Clark's hand, "What are you doing?"
Clark didn't know how to start the chain of events to set his whole plan off. Clark took a step closer, twisting the gun I his hand.
"Clark, what did you do?" Lionel guessed by Clark's expression that Clark had already used the gun.
Hey! Hey! Hey!
How can I scream when
The pain is such a relief
Clark suppressed his rage, "I didn't do anything."
"Give me the gun." Lionel reached for it, and Clark moved it out of his reach,
"No!"
Lionel didn't know what Clark was doing, "Alright, Clark." He took a step towards Clark, and put a hand on Clark's shoulder.
Clark pulled away, "Don't."
Lionel didn't back off, but gripped Clark's wrist; it was the hand with the gun. Clark pretended to struggle as Lionel ripped the guns from his hands.
"Now tell me what you are doing." Lionel said, holding the gun at his side.
"It must be hard having two sons who hate you." Clark gave the tinniest smirk.
Lionel just stared at him, without words.
"I only wish I could remember the look on your face when I revealed my knowledge of your past..." Clark's smirk grew bigger, "You are cunning; I'll give you that. But no matter how much I hate it, I'm your son. You always taught me it was survival of the fittest, but I never believed you would try and kill me."
Kill me! Kill me! Kill me, ya!
Kill me, heal me!
Kill me, heal me ya!
Kill me, heal me all along
"Clark, are you on drugs again?" Lionel knew he wasn't.
"Sure, Lionel. I'm high." Clark said sarcastically, "Judy told me what you've been doing to me... making me weak."
"Clark, I know you trusted her, but she wasn't sound of mind. I was notified not 20 minutes ago that she killed herself." Lionel said calmly.
"Lair!" Clark shouted, "You had her killed!" Clark lunged towards Lionel, who moved back.
"Clark, I think you should just leave, before you do something you will really regret." Lionel said, moving so that his desk separated him from Clark.
"Why? Anything I do I can always cover up, just like you do. But you're still losing Lionel, because the two people who are supposed to love you, hate you." Clark said it with conviction. He saw the glimmer of anger in Lionel's eyes, and continued to antagonize him, "Even with your billions of dollars, you are still a failure, Lionel."
Clark smiled internally as he saw Lionel's anger grow, "Mom saw you for what you were! She hated it so much she killed Julian to protect him from you."
Lionel couldn't hide the look of anger and surprise on his face, "Don't talk about things you know nothing about. Your brother was the one who ended Julian's life. It was an accident."
"No it wasn't. Lex covered for her, because he knew you'd destroy her. It's true Lionel, and in the back of your mind you know it's true." Clark mentally pushed him, "You are responsible for his death; you drove her to it!"
"No!" Lionel shouted it, but Clark was so close to getting what he wanted.
"Your parents didn't love you either! They treated you like shit, like you treat me. So you killed them! You can't hold any relationships except out of fear." Clark said it with the hatred he was feeling inside, "and no matter how much you try and hide it, you are weak!" Clark used tactics he had heard Lionel inflict on Lex so many times growing up. He knew they were working by the fury he saw in Lionel's eyes.
"Shut up!" Lionel bellowed.
I get the courage to
Pick up the nails
'Cause it's killing time
Clark was immensely surprised how little it was taking to infest Lionel with rage towards him, but then again it hurts most when the people you love, hurt you. Clark was scared to continue with the final blow, but he reached deep inside himself; pulling out the strength and courage he needed, "I hate and-"
Clark let out a gasp, and a grin covered his face, as he grabbed his stomach and stumbled backwards.
Breathe in your love
You're ferocious
You're in my lungs
Necessity, craving
You're electricity
Hey hey hey!
Feature my pain
Ya! You kill me
With ways of fear
Without peace
Ya! Your love is poison
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Lex pulled his vibrating cell phone from his pocket, and opened the text message.
Lex,
Come to the mansion. Emergency. Make sure you get security tapes
before Lionel. Hurry!
-Clark
He stopped his car outside the mansion and slammed the door as he jogged into the mansion.
He immediately heard shouts from Lionel's office, and raced up the stairs, and slammed open the door. The shouting had stopped, and the only person Lex saw in the room was Lionel, and he was smoldering and an expression of satisfaction and shock covered his face.
Lex had never felt a sense of tragedy so much in his life, and yet he didn't know why.
"Dad, what are you doing?" Lex tried to sound casual, but it was hard. Lionel's eyes were locked on the floor. Lex panicked, as he smelt the familiar aroma of gunpowder, and saw the gun at Lionel's hip.
Kill me! Kill me!
Kill me, heal me all along!
KILL ME!!!
I can't live without it
I can't live without it
I can't live without it
Lex quickly moved closer, and saw what the couch had been blocking, from his previous point of view.
His brother was sprawled out on the floor, one hand over a large spot of blood, which continued to grow.
No, this wasn't happening. It was impossible. Lionel wouldn't shoot Clark... yet he had.
Kill me! Kill me! Kill me, ya!
Kill me, heal me!
Kill me, heal me ya!
Kill me, heal me all along
"What did you do?" Lex thought he had screamed it, but it came out as less than a whisper, in his panicked state. Lionel again was silent, as Lex dropped to the floor over Clark.
"Clark." He nudged Clark's head, provoking Clark to open his eyes a slit.
"Lex?" Clark was breathing hard, "I stopped him." Lex thought he saw Clark try to smile, but it was twisted into a look of pain.
Lex ripped open Clark's shirt to reveal two bullet wounds. One was in his lower abdomen and the other was in his chest, not quite as high as his shoulder, it was placed directly on his chest, opposite to his heart.
Lex removed Clark's hand from the wound, but Clark let out a gasp.
"Clark, hold on." Lex had never been so panicked like this. It was hard just to think. It was only a miracle that he managed to make a call for help, as he held his dying brother in his arms.
"Clark, stay awake." Lex couldn't help but notice that Clark's blood had increased double already. He had to stop the bleeding if Clark was even going to have a chance.
When Lex finally broke his gaze from Clark, to look for something to stop the bleeding, he saw Lionel was gone; for how long, he didn't know.
Lex pulled off his shirt and wadded it up, as he set it on Clark's stomach and applied pressure, trying to stop the bleeding.
Clark let out the most painful scream Lex had ever heard. Lex's instinct was to stop pressing against Clark's wound with his shirt, but he couldn't, Clark would die. So Lex tried not to cry as Clark cried out in pain.
&
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&TBC...
song lyrics by skillet "kill me, heal me"