Rudy Can't Fail 12
Jess handed Luke another nail as he watched him put up another shelf in the bathroom.
"Trust me, my friend," Luke said as he worked diligently. "You will thank me for this."
"I already do," Jess replied. " I hate tootie-fruity toothpaste."
"Tootie-fruity?" Luke asked. "Lorelai uses cinnamon."
"Count your blessings."
"So, did I tell you that Lorelai fixed my oven?" Luke asked.
Jess nodded. "You did."
"Did I tell you that I bought a TV for my bedroom so she wouldn't be bored?"
Jess blinked, and then shook his head. "That's just far too easy."
Luke glared. "Ha, ha." He sighed continued to work on the shelf. "Did I tell you that I got roped into going to Richard and Emily Gilmore's vow renewal?"
"No, you did not."
"They're renewing their vows," Luke repeated. "Lorelai is the maid of honor and Rory is the best man."
"She'll make a very lovely man," Jess commented. "You can tell her I said so."
"Who renews their vows?" Luke asked, ignoring his nephew. "It's just a stupid excuse to have a party."
"Any excuse to have a party is a good excuse," Jess pointed out.
"If my mother wanted to have a party she would just walk into Doose's and say 'Hey! I'm havin' a party!'"
"You do live in Stars Hollow," Jess said.
"Man, my mother could throw a party," Luke reminisced. "Nobody threw a party like Susan Danes."
"Didn't know her," Jess told him.
Luke nodded. "I know. She was a great lady. She woulda loved you."
Jess gave a slow nod.
"You woulda liked her, too," Luke added.
Jess paused, and then kept the conversation going. "I don't have a TV in my room."
Luke took the hint. "Yeah? Why not?"
"Better sex without Charlie Rose in the background," Jess nodded. "Nadia gets nightmares when they start talking about Nazis."
"Huh," Luke commented.
"Lucy! I'm home!"
Luke blinked at Jess. "She calls you Lucy?"
"Hi," Nadia said, swinging into the bathroom.
"Hey," Jess replied, pecking her on the lips.
She smiled. "Whatcha doin?"
"Nothing," Jess replied.
"Whatcha doin?" she asked again.
"Nothing," Jess repeated a little harsher.
"Whatcha-"
"Making a shelf!" Luke yelled. "Jeez! Stop asking already!"
"A shelf?" Nadia repeated. "Would this be a shelf for my tootie-fruity toothpaste…so I don't wake up in the morning to my boyfriend growling about 'god-damned, disgusting tootie-fuckin'-fruity toothpaste?"
"Yes, yes it would," Jess replied.
"Happy," Nadia grinned. "How are you, Luke?"
"Fine," Luke nodded. "You?"
"I'm good," Nadia replied. "How's Lorelai?"
"Also fine," Luke nodded again.
"And Rory?"
"She's gonna be a man," Jess told her.
"Well, that's exciting," Nadia replied, obviously a little confused.
Luke shook his head. "How are you, Nadia?"
"Good," she replied, wrapped an arm around Jess. "We're going to a concert tomorrow night."
"Yeah?"
Nadia nodded. "The Violent Femmes."
"The who?" Luke asked.
Jess smirked. "Just build the shelf."
"Sounds good."