Day Nine

For what felt like the thousandth time, James pulled at the restraints holding his hands behind his back. When he'd been dumped on the floor in the cell the night before, he'd looked up to see Rabastan Lestrange bending over him.

"Since I already went to the trouble of dragging your wet hide back, I thought I'd bring you a welcome home gift." Before James had the chance to react, Rabastan had flipped him over and snapped the shackles on.

"We're family here, James. Family doesn't let beloved members run out and drown themselves, you know. It was quite the flight following you out. You're a good swimmer. I thought you'd lose it long before you did. Thought you'd at least hesitate before jumping in the water."

"You... saw me from the time I left the grate..."

"Since long before that. Thought I'd let you have a nice swim. But just the once, James. Sleep well. And pray that Sirius doesn't. From what I heard Bella was doing, if he goes under now, his soul is on the line." He paused to smile. "Sweet dreams."

The shackles were certainly effective; there was no comfortable position that James could find. But most noticeably, he could not transform. He'd spent the first several hours of the night desperately struggling against the restraints, thinking only of getting to Sirius' side. His wrists were bloody from the effort, but the shackles held fast.

He could hardly think of himself after what he'd seen Sirius endure. James had seen men driven to suicide from having a wand broken in the heat of battle. James closed his eyes and tugged at the restraints again, unsurprised when they once again did not give.

Of course, not every broken wand had such effects on its wizard. Nevertheless, one destroyed in violence... it was disastrous. James shuddered to think what the effects of a slow and sadistic destruction would be. Worse than terrible, he was certain. He tried not to think about it, but that proved to be utterly impossible.

How much longer? His mind turned over and over. Human activity meant morning meant another day meant where were they? Why would they leave him? Why weren't they coming for him? James held onto the hope that the inaction meant that all was relatively well. Surely, they'd delight in telling him if it wasn't, wouldn't they? Wouldn't they?

He tried to flip himself over, mostly for something to do, to quiet his mind down. Every muscle was still leaden from the day before, and the effort it took to do so was enormous. Even the sudden mental image of himself flopping around like a fish after it had been plucked out of the sea could not make him smile. Somehow, he suspected that the smile he had felt during his few moments of freedom was the last one he'd smile for a long time. If ever. Simple treasure that no one thinks of, that.

James landed hard on his other side. The spot he'd been occupying all night was dark with salt water. His robes, especially the side that had been underneath, had not dried. Shivering, he tried to coax his stiff muscles into curling up ever tighter as the wetter half of his robes settled on top of him.

Where were they? James had thought he couldn't get colder, but his teeth started to chatter as new waves of ice started to seep through his skin. When would they come? He pulled in tighter, wincing as he did so. Why had they not come yet? Salt water dripped off his hair into his eyes. Was Sirius even alive? James cursed himself for the mistake of moving. Why was he even thinking about any of this? He had other things to concentrate on.

Where were they?

More than anything, the waiting was killing him. Sirius needed a friendly presence. At this point, James didn't know whether Sirius would even know if he was there. But he had to be there. Especially now, when every hour, every minute, every second could be fatal. Footsteps passed outside. And yet they did not come. The minutes dragged by like hours. Footsteps passed again. And yet they did not come.

James didn't know how long it took him to cry out with frustration. But he was shocked when the passing footsteps stopped, and changed direction at it.

"James is awake, look at that." The door opened loudly. Rodolphus came in with Rabastan behind him. "We were wondering when you'd wake up. Master decided that you needed your rest this morning. Did you enjoy your morning to sleep in?" James looked up, incredulous.

"No answer? For shame. He treats his servants well; you should appreciate it."

Through clenched teeth, James finally spoke. "I am not his servant."

"Of course you are. You just haven't admitted it yet. Up you go. Rabastan, a hand if you would?" The brothers lifted him with surprising gentleness. James was extremely disconcerted at the tender touch; he eyed the pair suspiciously. "Besides. An hour here or there doesn't make a difference. They've been at it all night. They'll be at it all morning and probably into the afternoon. You'll have plenty of time to watch. You should find this interesting. Most people don't get a chance to see this close up. And if you're well rested, you'll be able to better appreciate it."

James had a horrible feeling that he knew who they were. He noticed the conspicuous absence of Dementors. Perhaps that was why the Lestranges were being so... sociable. But James doubted it. He was wary of the sudden change, and he was frightened by it.

Rabastan laughed. It was the same warm and hearty laugh that James remembered from the week before. He had privately hoped that he'd imagined that laugh. "Come, James. We have places to go, people to see." Leaving the shackles in place, he took James by the upper arm, leading him down the corridor to the Interrogation Room. This was the first time James could remember the trip clearly. He knew where it was by now, from his mad dash, but this was his first calm walk there. He would have laughed if he were capable.

Rodolphus opened the door, and James' stomach dropped out. He hadn't seriously imagined that there were only three Dementors in all of Azkaban prison, but truth of the matter was that he hadn't put a lot of thought into the subject, really. In a tight mass in the dead center of the room were what looked like a hundred Dementors. In the middle of the pack of robes and hoods, on a table, was Sirius. Weak though he was, his strength to scream was not diminishing with time.

"Amazing, isn't it?" Rabastan whispered in his ear. "They don't get a chance like this often. In fact, I don't think they've ever had it this good." James thought that if he weren't restrained in shackles, he would have tried to hit the man. As it was, he stood still.

The swarm rippled and undulated so that those on the outside moved to have its turn on the inside, and so on the procession went again and again. A white haze was lifting off Sirius, and the centermost Dementors were inhaling it with almost orgasmic ecstasy. James wanted to turn away, as if the mere action of closing his eyes would make it stop happening, but he was transfixed.

Only once the shock started to pass did James notice that the wave of cold had not hit him. The Dementors were ignoring him completely in favor of their delicacy. Disturbing though it was to look at, every Dementor was clear as day. James had never seen them look like that before. The cloaks were in precise detail, the skeleton hands in crisp sharpness. James thought he could even make out faces under the heavy hoods. Somehow, he wasn't sure which was worse: Dementors attacking him, or Dementors ignoring him. The sheer clarity of vision with which he could see their tall forms possibly frightened him more than the memories they brought.

Bellatrix was already in the room. "Jimmy! You're awake!" She beckoned to Rabastan and Rodolphus to bring James over to where she was perched on another table. James winced. Somehow, he could stomach the brothers, and he thought he could even wrap his mind around Dementors that were clear as day, but not her. How was he supposed to deal with what was happening to his best friend if she was here? He sighed internally as he was pushed along.

"There's a better view up here. Sit him up here with me, would you?" She would pick the spot with the best view, wouldn't she? James bit his lip not to make a snide remark as he was bodily lifted onto the table. He knew that no good would come of it.

"Been a while since we watched the show together, Jimmy. I've missed this." She didn't tear her eyes away from the spectacle. "Just look at that. Usually you only get a thin mist, but they'll have a feast today."

James remained silent. His feet didn't quite reach the floor, and his legs swung unconsciously, despite his best efforts to stop them. It somehow seemed wrong to him that he should be sitting on a table with his legs swinging while Sirius was screaming his soul out. No matter how still he tried to keep them, still they swung. Looking down, he saw that Bellatrix was swinging hers as well. He sighed.

"Oh, don't sigh like that. Cheer up! Look on the bright side." She nudged him lightly on the shoulder and laughed. "He's alive, isn't he? It's not like we left him alone all night."

James finally turned to look at Bellatrix. "No, you just tortured him without break. Should I be grateful?" He was exhausted, and he sounded it, but there was a bitter edge on his voice.

"Yes," she replied simply. "Besides. Once they caught scent of him, they came from all over the island. That one over there," Bellatrix pointed to one of the Dementors, James couldn't tell which one, "actually came from off island. Couldn't pull them away if I wanted to. This is their due. They serve, and thus they are served. It's a cycle. You see?"

James unfortunately could see. It sickened him. Bellatrix continued. "Useful, actually. Gives us a heads up when someone gets seriously suicidal. Don't usually get a response like this, of course." She smiled to herself.

James tried to shift discreetly away. Inching along, he tried not to let his legs swing too much. He winced and felt the blood rush out of his cheeks as his feet made contact with Bellatrix's legs.

Bellatrix's reaction was lightning fast. Her hand snaked out, catching James by the wrists. "Trying to get away, are we?" She had yet to turn to face him.

"Of course not. Where would I go?" The pressure on his arms was starting to become painful.

"Then you kicked me deliberately?" Amusement was creeping into Bellatrix's voice. James froze like a deer in bright lights.

Sliding her hand under James' arms and up his back, Bellatrix pushed him off the table as she stood up. Leading him along, she walked to the edge of the mass of Dementors and pressed the both of them into the edge of the throng.

"You want a place to go? I have a place to go." Even if they hadn't been aiming for it, the Dementors were sweeping them forward, swirling inward. It was too late to try to get out now. James' ears started to ring and echo with Sirius' screams as they were drawn closer.

Bellatrix caught hold of the table as they reached the centre so the pair would not be swept outside again. "Look!" She steadied herself, let go of the table, and swept a hand through the white mist rising off Sirius, causing it to ripple. The reaction of the Dementors was immediate. Whichever way she directed the mist, the swarm shifted in that direction. Laughing at her game, Bellatrix let her hand fall, catching hold of the table again.

Even here, the Dementors ignored James completely. He had never seen a Dementor up close before with such clarity. His stomach turned continually. He tried to bend over Sirius, to try to let his friend know that he was there, at the very least, but Bellatrix would not let him; the hand on his back held him firmly upright.

"You're only a spectator here, James. Me, they're used to. You, you're just food. It is only through my influence that you can get so close. You don't want them to notice you, do you?" All amusement fell from her voice as she spoke. It was a genuine warning. A shiver ran up James' spine at how deadly serious her whisper was.

Standing as still as he knew how, James felt as though he were dying a little at a time as he stood over Sirius' screaming form, able to do nothing. "Can I talk to him? Will he hear me? Will they notice?"

"They won't notice, but he won't hear you." It was disconcerting to hear Bellatrix sound so gentle.

James tried nonetheless. "Sirius, I'm here. It's me. James. I'm here for you." The shrieks did not subside, nor did Sirius make any indication that he knew James was there. James persisted.

"I know you can't hear me, but I'm here for you." His vision blurred, and at first he thought that the Dementors had taken notice of him until the tears spilled over. "Take me out of here, Bellatrix."

"What's the magic word, Jimmy?" The playful mockery had returned to her voice. He felt her hand reach farther up his back and felt delicate fingers curl in his wet hair. James closed his eyes and clenched his teeth. Not now. Gods. Any time but now.

"Please."

"Not the one I was looking for."

James became frantic. Not what she was looking for? What did she want? He could barely think. This was neither the time nor the place for games. "What do you want me to say?"

Bellatrix's eyes gleamed. "Beg me."

With a feeling like he was already selling his soul, James whispered, "I beg you." The words were hardly audible. He was too exhausted to fight, and the playing field was too dangerous.

"It's a start." Bellatrix giggled as she maneuvered the two of them into the swirling tide that carried them out of the mass of Dementors. James hardly registered anything anymore. The whole world phased out around him as the words I beg you rang through his head over and over again.

Nothing existed. Only the three words that had torn open his very being, leaving him empty, leaving him not whole. Over and over, the words rang through his head.

I beg you.

I beg you.

I beg you.

James was only grateful that he had not slipped far enough to speak a different set of three words, but it was little solace.

Authors' Note: The rudiments of this chapter (and please don't kill us upon finding this out) were written long before the PoA movie came out. We claim glee rights for predicting the white mist. In that light, however, we apologize for the slow rate at which we've updated this story. It was always meant to be a backburner project, but even we never anticipated it to be this slow. It's a difficult story to write, and some interesting things are in the immediate chapters ahead, which slows it down even more. However! Reviews do motivate us wonderfully. (Subtle? Us? Never.)