What Fools We Women Can Be Part 3

JAG: Mac/Harm…Shipper…not really Webb Friendly

Summary: This is set to take place in the days that follow the whole Sadik debacle and all that not so fun stuff. Yeaper…

Disclaimer: I don't own 'em…are you happy!

­­

POV: No one in particular.

She sits at her desk. She has a small smile on her face. Something she hasn't been seen with in a long time. Yes she has smiled in the past year, but any of her friends would be the first to tell you that those weren't real smiles. They were simply smiles for the sake of smiling. This smile is different. It's a true honest to God Sarah Mackenzie smile. As to what put that smile on her face—well that is a mystery to those close to her. Well all except for one and he isn't telling a single soul.

"Ma'am?"

"Yes Coats, how can I help you?"

Sarah Mackenzie looks up from her work and listens to what the Petty Officer has to say.

"You have a visitor. I told him you were busy with case files, but he was a bit persistent. Said he needs to see you today because he is going out of the country and doesn't know when he will be back. I told him that you had a lunch date with the
Commander, but that didn't seem to phase him."

Normally, Sarah's face would have lost the smile she had been sporting all week, but not this time. It was Friday and her and Harm had big plans for the weekend. And she was looking forward to their lunch date since he had been TDA starting Monday. The Monday after they both decided it was time to throw caution into the wind and just listen to their hearts. No her smile did not fall, it only got bigger and brighter if that was humanly possible.

"Send him in and please tell the Commander to come on in when he gets back from court. Tell him not to worry about knocking."

This is it. The moment she hadn't really been dreading, but to say that she was looking forward to it would be a gross understatement. She knew it was something that would have to be dealt with. Something that she would have to own up to. The least she could do was let the poor fool know that she wasn't in love with him. She had never been in love with him and that it was wrong for her to let him think that she had such feelings for him.

"Sarah?"

Sarah Mackenzie's attention was now focused on the man standing in her door way.

"Webb, please come in and sit down. I owe you an explanation."

"Webb? Since when do you call me Webb and not Clay?"

Ummm…good question. Did I ever really see him as Clay? Or was that just me trying to convince myself that I wasn't settling again. That he was the one that I really wanted to be with?

"You have always been Webb. You will always be Webb. I was trying to fool myself and in the process I lead you on and that was the last thing I wanted to do. I am sorry for leading you on. I am sorry for ending things the way I did. But I will not be sorry for finally admitting to myself that I am in love with Harm. I will not be sorry for finally going after what I want. I will not be sorry for finally being happy. I know you thought you could make me happy and give me what you thought I wanted. But you can't. We both want very different things out of life. I am sorry, really I am. I hope you find someone who wants the same things from life that you do."

To say that Clayton Webb was shocked would be a serious understatement. Any observer could tell that he was hurt. Some might say broken. One observer could also tell that Sarah Mackenzie was a bit uneasy.

"Commander Rabb"

The tall naval officer diverted his attention away from the two people in Sarah Mackenzie's office and focused his attention on the petty officer standing in front of him.

"Yes Coats"

"Col. Mackenzie said that you could just go on into her office when you got back from court. She said not to worry about knocking."

"Thank you Petty Officer. Could you please put these files on my desk and take any messages I might get?"

"Sir Yes Sir"

Harm handed off the files to the Petty Officer and headed straight towards Sarah's office. He didn't knock or even let his presence be known. I quietly slipped into her office. She looked up in time to see him enter but she didn't let it show on her face.

"So you love him and you think that he can give you what you want?"

Clayton Webb is not one to lose without a fight. Deep down he may really love this woman or he may not. But one thing is for sure; he is not going to lose the girl to Harmon Rabb.

"Yes I love him. And yes he can give me what I need and what I want. I know he wants a family, children, and hell even a dog. You don't want any of that. But I do. And it's more than just him being able to give me what I want. He loves me. I love him. I don't have to pretend to be someone I am not when I am around him. With you it was always like that. I hated being drug from one function to another. It was like dating Dalton all over again. You love your job. The travel, the mystery and the danger. I want to settle down and get far away from that. But you seem to be running towards it with arms wide open. I can't live like that."

Harm just watched. What she had just said to Clay wasn't new to him. She had told him as much this weekend. But it was nice hearing it again. Clay just blinked. And Sarah just stood there and watched the two men. She realized that Clay's spook powers must be fading with age because he still hadn't noticed Harm standing behind him.

"Fine. Go with Rabb. If that is what you want, then so be it. I'll be out of the country and don't know when I will return. When I do return don't come crawling back to me because this thing with Rabb blew up in your face. I will not be a warm body to sleep with."

For the first time in a week, Sarah Mackenzie's smile vanished. It was replaced with a slight frown and paired a look of pain that came complete with tears. Harm knew he needed to stop things before they got very ugly.

"Umm…Mac…it's time for lunch and the Admiral said we could secure early after we give our weekly reports to him. You ready to go?"

Mac straightened up and started collecting her things and securing her desk. It was then that Clay slowly turned around only to find Harm casually propped up against the door frame with his arms loosely crossed across his chest.

"Clay. Good too see you."

Harm's tone was cool and level. Mac was grateful. Now if only Clay would be the same towards Harm.

"Umm…Clay I have to go. Good luck where ever you're going and try to stay safe."

Clay simply nodded his head and exited the office. His shoulders were slumped but his head was still held high. Guess he finally got it. Sarah Mackenzie's heart belongs to one man. He was not that man.