Disclaimer: yea yea, don't rub it in...

A/N: Okay, so I'm not sure if I'm thrilled with how this chapter unfolded. I'm seeing some serious plot holes in how this situation will work out... So I don't know if I like it. I'm rather annoyed with this fic right now so let me know if you like this chapter of whether I should rewrite it. Anyways, I posted an extra-long chapter since I made you wait over a month (Sorry about that). Thanks to Kiki,a, loveconquers ( I LOVE your fanfiction, btw, your updates make my day, Traveling Souls is AMAZING: D ), bohemianbabe (mxangel, read some of ur old stufff, liked it lots), and Mxfan214. You guys rock, thanks so much for sticking with me. And really, seriously, let me know if you like where this is going, cuz I really don't think I do... Anyways, here it goes:

SIX WEEKS POST-NEILSON…

"You alright, Shal? You look kind of pale?" Brennan rubbed her shoulder gently. She leaned her back against his chest as the sat at the booth in the night club. Jesse and Lexa were on the floor, dancing and laughing. Jesse leaned down and kissed her neck; she giggled and ran her fingers through the hair at the base of his neck.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just tired." She reassured him.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, Bren, I'm okay." She smiled.

"You wanna dance?"

"Not right now. Could you just maybe sit here with me for awhile? Could you just hold me in your arms and listen to the music with me." Another flare of concern erupted within him at her words. Something was off with her, he could feel it. But he nodded and kissed the back of her head, pulling her closer to his chest.

"I'll never let you go," he whispered in her ear. "You're safe with me. Just lay back, close your eyes. I'll take care of you." She sighed and snuggled into his arms.

"I know you will."

"Hey, man, is she okay?" Jesse asked as he and Lexa came back to their booth. Shalimar was asleep in Brennan's arms. He stroked her soft curls affectionately.

"I don't know. She says she's fine, but she looks pale to me."

"Well, we can't force her to tell us when something's up. We just have to wait for her to come to us." Brennan nodded at Jesse's words.

"Are we ready to go home, guys?" Lexa asked. The guys nodded and Jesse held Shalimar up with gentle arms so Brennan could get to his feet and stretch before picking the feral up in his arms. She mumbled something and laid her head on his shoulder, arms slung around his neck.

"Alright, Shal, let's get you home."

"Good morning, Shalimar." Brennan announced cheerfully. She groaned and threw her blankets up over her head. The world kept spinning and she was freezing. She felt like she was going to be sick.

"Brennan…" she groaned, leaned over the edge of the bed, and vomited.

"Shal!" He exclaimed and ran to hold back her hair. He rubbed her back in slow circles, helping her stomach calm. He snatched a tie off of the bedside table and slipped it around her hair, then ran to grab a bowl for her to get sick into. She took the bowl in shaking hands and sat up on the bed. Her face was pale and drenched with cold sweat. She shivered and he wrapped a blanket around her shoulders.

Shalimar laid down in a curled up lump beneath the blankets, feeling foolish, embarrassed, and nauseous as Brennan cleaned up her mess. He mopped up with paper towels, then took out the carpet cleaner vacuum and washed the rug. When that was done, he sprayed the air with a bit of her perfume to get rid of the smell of puke.

He nimbly jumped over the wet spot in the run and sat on the bed beside her shivering lump. He rubbed her back gently, knowing where it was by the curve of her back. "Shalimar?" She eased the blanket off of her face and looked up at him pitifully.

"I'm sorry," she croaked, eyes welling with tears. She hated being sick.

"It's okay, really, but are you?"

"I'm okay…well…for the most part; it's probably just a stomach flu or something."

"Maybe we should go see Jesse? Get a scan done?" She shook her head weakly.

"No, Bren, it's okay, really. I'd kinda prefer to just lay here awhile." He eyed her with concern still prominent on his dark features.

"Okay," he stood to leave her in peace so she could sleep, but she tugged at his arm gently.

"Stay with me, please?" Her wide eyes pleaded with him and he smiled warmly before laying down beside her and rubbed her back gently until she fell asleep, snuggled against his chest.

"Bren?" Jesse's voice questioned over their COMlink connection, worry evident in his voice. Brennan gently disentangled himself from Shal's sleeping form and padded silently across the room before answering.

"Yeah, Jess," Brennan silently cursed himself for not comming Jesse to let him know what was going on. It was terribly inconsiderate of him.

"You alright? What about Shalimar?" He sounded like he'd been getting progressively more nervous for them all morning.

"We're fine, Jess, Shal's sick though. She's sleeping. But she wanted me to stay with her and I didn't have the heart to leave. Sorry I didn't COM you, we didn't mean to worry you."

"It's alright." He paused. "Wait a sec. Shal's sick? Really? She never gets sick." Brennan could almost see the disbelief on the younger man's face.

"I dunno man; she woke up and vomited. She says she doesn't need a scan though, so I guess that's her choice."

"Guess so, just let me know if she feels any worse, alright? Or if she pukes again?"

"Will do bro, hey would you mind slippin' me a sandwich or something, or at least a drink. Just 'cause she's not hungry, doesn't mean I'm not."

"No problem, Bren, be there in a few."

"You rock, see ya!" Brennan cut the connection and went back over to perch beside Shalimar on the bed. His loose tie in her hair and long since fallen off and he brushed a lock of hair away from her face. Her skin was kind of clammy to the touch. Brennan frowned, hoping she was okay.

Jesse showed up a few minutes later with a plate of breakfast for Brennan, who thanked him quietly, and stepped out into the hall to eat so the smell of food wouldn't wake Shal and make her stomach more upset. "How's she doing?" Jess asked, leaning against the wall beside him.

"She's sleeping and hasn't thrown up again, so better I guess."

"That's good. Wonder what's actually wrong with her," Jesse pondered. Brennan's eyes snapped to his face.

"You don't think it's a stomach flu?"
"Bren, you know as well as I do that Shal NEVER gets sick." Jesse paused. "No…it's something else."

"Like what?" Brennan frowned. What was he thinking?

"I don't know, but if she gets worse or doesn't improve, bring her to the lab for a scan. Kicking and screaming if necessary." Brennan nodded.

"Kicking and screaming."

SEVEN WEEKS AFTER THE NEILSON AFFAIR….

Shalimar leaned over the porcelain toilet bowl weakly and vomited again, face pale and covered in cold sweat. Brennan came into the bathroom just as she threw up once more. Concern flashed across his dark features and he knelt beside her, holding back her long tresses and rubbing her back gently. She ran an arm across her lips, hands shaking as she turned to him.

"Shal? Are you okay?" Brennan asked softly, stroking her back.

"Yeah," She replied unconvincingly. "I think it's just a stomach flu or something."

"I think it might be more serious than that. You've been sick like this for the last week. I think it's time we took you to see Jesse so he can check you out."

"No, Brennan, I'm fine. I'll be good as new in a few days."

"Please Shal? Please do this. For me?" He looked at her pleadingly, concern still prominent in his dark eyes. She melted under his gaze.

"Okay. Okay…Let's go." She agreed. She tried to stand but her shaking legs just wouldn't support her. Brennan picked her up gently and carried her to the lab, comming Jesse to meet them and spending several long minutes assuring him that she wasn't hurt, just sick.

Jesse arrived at the lab a few moments after Brennan had laid Shalimar down on the examination chair. Jesse patted her arm in concern. "How're you feeling?"

"Crappy," she replied honestly. "Let's just get this over with so I can go sleep and Brennan can stop pestering me."

Jesse smiled and strode over to the computers, tapping a few keys. The scan started and a light played over her skin. Jesse waited for the results and printed them to show the others. He scanned them, eyes freezing about halfway down.

"Jesse?" Brennan asked upon seeing his face.

"Hang on." He said, going back to the computer. "One more scan." He added to Shalimar and the scan began. When the results came back he stared at them for several long seconds before letting out a soft, "oh my God," before turning to Brennan and Shalimar.

"What is it Jesse?" Brennan asked, frowning in concern.

"Shal…I don't know how to tell you this." He began quietly. He truly looked at a loss for words.

"Just tell me Jess. What's wrong with me? Is it serious?" Shal asked.

"Uhhh….not serious, I guess….depending on how you view things….medically, no, it's not serious…"

"Then what is it Jesse, come on, tell me." Shalimar stood from the chair and started towards him.

Jesse took a breath and swallowed hard. "You're pregnant Shal." She stopped in her tracks, eyes wide before her legs buckled and Brennan caught her as she fainted.

"I'm WHAT?" She exclaimed when she awoke several minutes later after Jesse confirmed what she'd heard. "Oh my God." She buried her face in her hands. This couldn't be happening. She felt Brennan's hand on her shoulder and looked up at Jesse, eyes burning.

"Whose is it?" She asked quietly.

"What?" he frowned, not understanding her question.

"Who is the father of this baby?" She asked calmly, even though her mind was screaming in panic.

"I don't know. I'd have to run some tests."

"Then run the damn tests, Jesse. If it's his, I don't want it." Her hands shook and tears welled in her eyes. "A baby borne of that is evil and I don't want it."

Brennan sat down beside her and wrapped her quaking body in his arms. She leaned into his chest and buried her face in his shirt, sobbing. She clutched at the fabric desperately, as if it were the only thing keeping her up. Brennan kissed her hair and stroked her back, making soothing noises in her ear. His eyes filled as he looked at Jesse over her head. Jesse closed his eyes and rubbed his face in frustration; there was nothing he could do to help her through this. He couldn't heal pregnancy. He couldn't just computer it away.

"Shal," Brennan whispered, cupping her chin in his hand and turning her face up to his. Tears streaked her pale face and she refused to meet his eyes. She was overwhelmed with shame and hatred of herself for letting that scumbag to touch her, violate her the way he did. She didn't want Brennan to see the shame in her eyes, the guilt. "Come on, Shal, look at me." His voice caught as her eyes met his as steadily as she could manage. Her eyes were so…hollow…her true feelings deeply shadowed.

"I should've fought harder," she whispered brokenly. "I let this happen. I let him do this to me. Let him take me and abuse my body…God, why didn't I fight harder? I should've fought harder. I'm so sorry Brennan. He took me and dirtied me. I'm not worth anything anymore." A sob tore from her lips and the tears began again. "I'm just a body now. A raped, beaten, filthy body. I don't deserve your love and your devotion. I should've fought harder for you. I'm sorry…I'm so so sorry…I don't deserve an-anything…"

With that she fled the room, covering her face with her hands to hide the tears. "Shalimar!" Brennan shouted, taking off after her, Jesse at his heels. Looks of concern flashed between the two team mates as they searched Sanctuary to no avail. Where was she? They would've heard if she'd started her motorcycle. Then they noticed the door to the mountaintop ajar.

The first snow had fallen the previous night, blanketing their world in a sheet of white. A crisp wind whipped around the two men, both thankful for their long-sleeved shirts and Brennan for the leather jacket he'd grabbed before running outside. It was at least five below outside Sanctuary and the guys shivered as the cold enveloped them in its' relentless arms. Worry flared in Brennan as he realized that, in her haste, Shalimar may have run out here with nothing but a tank-top on. She'd freeze to death before she went back in to face them.

"SHALIMAR!" Brennan cried out, the wind whipping the words back in his face. "SHAL! COME ON SHAL, ANWER ME!" He turned to his companion. "God, Jess, we've gotta find her, she could die out here."

"I know, but where the hell'd she go?" He shouted over the growing wind. It was as if nature was working against them. Brennan shouted back that he didn't know and they continued their search. The wind picked up and snow swirled around them, reducing visibility to just a few feet in front of them. "Maybe we should split up?" Jesse hollered.

"No! It'd be too dangerous in this weather! We have to stick together!"Brennan replied. I just hope we can find our way back to Sanctuary, he thought.

"SHAL!" They shouted together, combining their voices to make them louder. "SHALIMAR!"

"BRENNAN!" Jesses cried, pointing to a dark lump in the snow. Brennan's heart froze in his chest and he rushed over to Shalimar's shivering form.

"Oh God, Shalimar!" He tore off his jacket and wrapped it around her. She blinked at him through the icicles that were forming on her long eyelashes. Her lips and cheeks were blue with cold. Brennan enveloped her in his arms and lifted her, Jesse walking in front of him to help block her from the fierce wind.

They managed to get back to Sanctuary without incident and rushed Shalimar to the lab. Brennan laid her on the bed while Jesse ran to get blankets. Brennan got a bowl of warm water and gently sponged her bare arms and face. Shalimar shivered horribly beneath the blankets and the guys couldn't seem to warm her. "Her heart rate is slowing. She's too cold." Jesse announced and he punched keys rapidly.

"Damn it! I always miss Emma, but it's times like these that her mutation was especially helpful."

Lexa strode into the room and immediately sensed the frantic air. "What's going on? What happened to her?" She asked, taking Shalimar's freezing hand in her own.

"She ran outside in nothing but a t-shirt," Brennan replied, trying to keep the irritation from his voice. "Now we can't get her warm."

"Move back, let me try something." She requested. Brennan eyed her suspiciously but stepped away. Anything was worth a try at this point. Lexa lit up her fingers and began tracing a hot outline around Shalimar's body, carving her shape into the fabric. "Get something reflective and hold it above and beside her." She instructed and Brennan ran to comply. Lexa shot light at both of the metallic pans and they heated instantly, forming a make-shift sauna-type-thing.

"Her body heat's rising," Jesse stated. "Keep it up, Lex."

Shalimar's shaking slowly subsided and she was able to sit up and wrap just a single blanket around her shoulders. Brennan hugged her gently and kissed her forehead and hair. "Why do you insist on scaring the piss outta me, huh?" He whispered to her. She laughed hoarsely.

"Nice job, Lexa," Jesse smiled. "Never would've thought of that."

"Yeah, Lex, thanks. You probably saved her life." Brennan said gratefully. Shalimar locked eyes with the other girl and Lexa nodded in understanding. She didn't have to say the words for Lexa to know that Shal was grateful.

"Guys, could we have a sec?" Brennan asked, nodding suggestively at the door. Lexa and Jesse smiled and obligingly left the room. Brennan walked over to the bed and sat beside Shalimar, rubbing her back gently. "Shalimar…"

"I'm sorry, Bren," She began, tears welling again in her eyes.

"You ran out there in a T-SHIRT, Shal! A T-SHIRT! IN THE MIDDLE OF WINTER! What the hell were you thinking! You could've frozen to death out there before Jesse and I found you! We got lucky! I love you, but that was really, really stupid! If you had died…" He shook his head and racked his fingers through his hair in frustration. He walked away from her and kicked at the steel door of a cabinet. "Dammit Shal!" Silence descended on the room as she stood from the bed and placed her hand on his shoulder.

Brennan sighed and turned to face her, cupping her cheeks in his hands. He leaned down and pressed his lips against her forehead. "I'm sorry, Brennan. I just, I panicked and the room seemed too small. I had to get out. I know it was stupid."

"Shal…I'm just upset because, yeah, it was stupid, but you didn't even stop to consider the other possibility in this situation. " She raised an eyebrow at him questioningly. "Shalimar, I could be the father. It doesn't necessarily have to be his. You and I have…so it could very well be mine. It's a fifty-fifty chance. Why don't we wait for Jesse to run that test and get the results before you go panicking again? If it turns out to be His, then we'll figure something out. If it's mine…well… we'll figure it out."

Shalimar took a deep breath and nodded slowly. "Okay…" She exhaled. "Okay…" She let loose a shuddering sigh. "You're right. The baby could be yours. I don't know why I didn't consider it before." Brennan rubbed her arms gently.

"Shock, fear, it's going to be okay, Shal, really."

"I know…It's just…I'm not an asset to this team pregnant. How can I help take down the bad guys with an extra life inside me? I would only put you guys in danger."

"I told you, we'll figure it out. Until then, try not to stress about it, okay?" He tilted her chin up, forcing her to meet his eyes. When she did, she smiled, love radiated off of him in waves, his eyes shone with it.

"I love you," Shal whispered as she leaned her head against his chest.

"I love you too." He placed a kiss in her hair.

TO BE CONTINUED...

A/N: Review please and thank you!