Forever and Ever
~FHB~
Chp 2- The shock…
A home to be in…
A face to come home to…
Your arms to fall and melt in…
Your heartbeat to sing with me…
Your unconditional love to enjoy and call mine…
Your body, which is my shelter…
You… my home, my everything…
I long for you…
I long for you…
I long for only you…
And I still miss you…
…I miss you…
So bad…it hurts…
That I never got to say…
I love you…beautiful Kaoru…
Merry Christmas
Love…
Soujiro…
________________________________________________________________________
December came in a flash. Hustle and bustle was everywhere. School was finally over and many children had gone out into the streets with their parents or love ones to enjoy the special holiday. After so many months of Kaoru's burial, Soujiro and the small gang had gone out to buy some decorations. Maybe it was understand that the children were young and could mature over time about their sister's death, but to Soujiro he was already grown, and he could not erase the pain she had left him with.
Choirs sang in full blast, and little children squeal with delight watching the world with so much carefree. He smirked when he was reminded of Kaoru's eyes. Those artistic blues, haunted him in his dreams and at any time he shut his eyes. Part of him was happy that she lived in him, and part grieved that he could only mop he let her go. So much to say to her, but the time was then, and the regrets are now. Patient blues watched over to the young child as she watched the angel spin in the show glass.
"Sou---sou! Look, it's an angel" Suzume pointed out.
Soujiro smiled. Stooping on his two feet, he was brought her height, where he watched the angel.
"Isn't she beautiful?" he hugged her when he saw sparkles in her chocolate depths…
A small smile came, and she slowly nodded.
"Would you like her for Christmas?" he asked…the cold mist escaping his lips.
Suzume stood their watching the angel… and then turned to Soujiro.
"Why would I need her Sou, when Kaoru's watching me?" she asked her voice soft…
Soujiro looked at her and had to admit she had a point.
"I dunno, just thought you wanted---" she shut him off by a hug.
"Christmas is not about gifts…it's about---being together…at least Kaoru made it sound so" she buried her face in the crook of his neck.
Yahiko stood looking at the Christmas tree, feeling all his emotions spin. Christmas came, and she wasn't here. Sunsets came and went, yet, he was left in the foreground always soaking himself in grief that she did not stand at his side to embrace it, together…and never would.
Could life be anymore unfair. Sanity was maintained thanks to Soujiro and not to some cross which he religiously placed his all in.
The cross, he watched the sparkling object on the top of tree.
(an: their can be angels, stars or even crosses at the top of trees)
Where are you my savior? Is this the salvation you give to your believers, am I left to fend on my own with nothing but gruesome agony and empathy which rocks my soul into worlds I can only scream and never be heard in. Why ? Why not punish a rich man who has too much instead of punishing men who did not need to withstand your wrath. Is it that you choose to test belief, of chose to make us say the hardest words in life, "good-bye" he whispered. A lonely tear fell in the snow…
'I wish you here, Kao' he smiled, remembering the times they were together. The times they fought, how he teased her about her cooking, how she looked--and what was it did he call her…
"I miss you chokes a sob b-busu…" he smiled and walked away. In the distance he could see Soujiro hugging his little sister. Poor kid thought Yahiko. She was left here at the youngest age to withstand it all. A burning reverie which could not die in her mind…
Soujiro hoisted his eyes seeing Yahiko coming from in the distance. Yahiko scooped some snow in his hand and molded it into the perfect snow ball. Feeling joyous for some whack reason, he pelt the ball in Soujiro's face. Soujiro got it bullseye. Suzume screamed when she felt the cold snow on her hand. Soujiro let her go, and spoke, : "what you do that for?"
"I dunno! Oh c'mon Soujiro, what's the matter a lil snow gonna make you sick?" Yahiko teased
"No…but it is gonna be war! WAR!!" he picked up some snow in his hand and shaped it. Pelting it to Yahiko, who got it straight on the back. From then on the two indulged in a snow fight while Suzume grew giddy and joined in. Yahiko flung his snow ball straight into Soujiro, whom ducked and was rewarded to the owner of Tokyo's flea market.
"Opps…??" he muttered.
"OUT!!" the man shouted and everyone ran out laughing…
"Woohoo! That was fun!" Yahiko laughed.
"Yeh, it was! Lets do it again" Suzume spoke
"I don't think so, I think I ate too much snow!!" Soujiro spoke and everyone laughed…
"So whose up for some hot chocolate, my treat" Soujiro spoke
Yahiko placed a hand on Soujiro's back, "Good, coz I wasn't paying!" Yahiko spoke jokily.
Suzume turned away and heard a lady speak.
She was lead to the woman's voice. Following the drowning and very familiar voice, she was shocked at what she saw…
~~~
"Yahiko, I know that" Soujiro spoke
"Good! So why did you say my treat?" Yahiko asked
"Because--(sou looks on the floor and sees no suzume) because Suzume is MISSING, again" he spoke.
"Oh shit, didn't this girl have enough of pretend-running away…?" Yahiko spoke
"What's that?" Soujiro asked
"Long story" Yahiko and Soujiro took off into a run and began looking for Suzume…
"And they are really nice" Suzume spoke from behind a curtain…
"Are they?" the fimiliar voice asked
"Yes, they are! And Yahiko and Soujiro really loves to fight!" she spoke
"Hahah! I'm sure they do" the female voice spoke
Yahiko and Soujiro turned to one another and then pulled at the curtain. Eyes were huge at what they saw.
Yahiko fainted and Soujiro was left to adrenalin of the woman in front of him, "Kaoru" he whispered…before joining Yahiko.
~~~~
An: Seriously, if I didn't place any humor in the fic, the fic would just be read as pure angst. I am hoping you guys get back into the grove for this fic. This is the continuation I spoke of in my bio. Thanks to **Thunder sister **for being an inspiration with her Soujiro and Kaoru fics. They are great and she is expected to write an upcoming lemon! The first on ff.net.
Please read and review her work, because it's so good.
Fhb quote © 2003: write for joy, write for pain, write for relaxation, write for life!
Please review.