Forever and Ever
FHB
Chapter 3- One night with my angel…
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"Hello Soujirou…" she spoke softly, her face pale and her eyes, those eyes were as blue as heaven could be.
"Wha-whattt" he whispered frightfully. Stepping back, he stumbled to the floor. "You're dead" came that frank statement.
"Don't say that Sou-chan. Kaoru-chan has ears you know. B'sides, I like to remember her as an angel." Suzume said, holding the spirit's hand. Soujirou was deeply shocked, right now he wanted to freak out but it seems Yahiko did the honours for the both of them.
"Kaoru" Soujirou whispered softly, the cold mist seeping from his lips.
"Soujirou. My dearest Soujirou, it's Christmas and somebody's wish on a star came true. Guess who?" she smiled.
"Oh my, who cares who! I have the world to tell you. I-I-I really never imagined this, b-but, it feels so real. Am I sleeping?" Soujirou really didn't want this to be a dream.
"If it's a dream, I really don't want it to end." Came her voice.
"W-What exactly are you?" Soujirou asked dusting his clothes off.
"An angel." She whispered.
"Where's your wings Kao-chan?" Suzume asked.
"Tucked away until it's time for me to fly away" Kaoru spoke
"Fly away?" Suzume repeated innocently.
"Hai. Fly, fly, high in the sky. Go home to heaven…where one day it awaits all of you" she whispered, "so lets have the last night to ourselves. To remember it for all time." She mused, "who's up for some adventure?" she asked in her same excited agile self.
"I am" Suzume roared, jumping up and down.
For a moment, Soujirou spaced out. Part of him really didn't understand this. One minute she's gone and the next moment she's there. In front of you. Smiling with you. That's the sort of paranoia that happens to make people freaks, but right now she was here. While the other part of him was really eager. He never got the chance to say the words he longed to say, but tonight, where the stars stilled peeped through, and the air was warm with hope, he would confess to her what his heart cried to say.
"Sou-chan…" Suzume shook the tall boy.
"W-ha? What happened?" he asked looking around interestedly.
The both girls giggled. "You spaced out Sou-chan, again"
Soujirou blushed, his eyes focusing on the floor.
"Come on, lets wake up this log" Suzume said, looking over the fainted Yahiko, "some man you are" she spoke aloud shaking him lightly.
"Wake up Yahiko" she shook gently, "come on, we have to go" she shook a little harder, "I know you're pretending so you better stop it" she smacked him solid across the face. Both Soujirou and Kaoru exchanged shocked gazes.
"A-hhehe, um, Suzume, honey, that's not how wake up people" Soujirou pried the small child from Yahiko.
"Who says he's people. He's an animal" she flatly said.
"You know what, how about you go stand next to Kaoru. You know, tell her the things thats happened to you. I'm sure she'd just love to know. Whatcha' say?" he asked, his blue eyes looking back at her intense hazel orbs.
"Alright then"
While Suzume and Kaoru spoke to each other. Soujirou did his best to wake up Yahiko. About fifteen to twenty minutes later, Yahiko was awoken. For most of the time, he kept silent. As if he was under a spell or trance. He barely did anything except looked at Kaoru off and on. Inside, he was broken. Lost. The sister he loved so dearly, now stood so boldly walking with his family. It's strange he thought. Everything becomes normal again, and then, its not so normal.
He sighs when he sees her laugh with Soujirou. For sure, this was Soujirou's night, but to Yahiko it was a night of heartache. He didn't want to let her go again but he knew all good treasures are soon washed away. And its not like he ever took them for granted, it was the saying, good things come to pass. Feeling the hurt, the torture, of being the one to feel this undesirable pain, made him shudder within. Inside everything was falling apart. What was left was only shattered memories.
Suzume, who was drawn close to Kaoru's side, listened to the older girl speak. Suzume loved every moment she spent with her sister. Her sister was an icon of most precious beauty, and goodness. She emanated something so real that Suzume swore she would become.
Thinking about it now, Suzume missed her sister dearly. Even though she's small, she feels it's a dream, one she doesn't want to wake up to. She doesn't want to wake up alone, running to her sister's empty room. She could remember everything clearly, as if it was yesterday. The pages flip from the old text-books and the hanging uniform nestles softly on the hanger by the open cupboard. The spilt pen that leaked, is now dried up, the memories left are so vivid and painful. It scars with dark life on the heart and it never seems to disappear. Suzume could remember the days her sister use to quarrel with her mom. They'd argue for hours until a resolution was made. She remembered the way Kaoru stomped down the hall, gritted her teeth and fumed like no end. Thinking about it, its pretty funny to see a lot of these things grew on Suzume.
But the good memories, like those where they use to brush each other's hair and sing at the moon or bask in the fields at night, were precious memories never to fade in the vault of the heart. Some things could not die and memories were such things.
The icicles dripped from the trees, while children ran about making snow-angels in the cold snow. The snow flakes, still falling on Suzume's nose, became something magical when everything perfect was readied about her sister.
"Is it beautiful in heaven Kaoru?" asked Suzume curiously, looking up at her sister.
"It is. You know everyone envisions heaven a different way and I guess that's how heaven is. Heaven is perfect. Nothing is wrong. There are animals and blue lakes that shimmer like diamonds. And sands that are soft like pillows. The grass and flowers all smell sweet and alike. Everything up there is perfect, even the human-beings there, they don't fight and kill each other like back on Earth, they're better than that. Someday, the heaven you envision will come to you, in its most sincere form of great wonder." She paused, "but heaven awaits for us and so does God. He expects us to do our best to be deserved of his home…someday you'll see the light behind the black curtain Suzume. That you will" she trailed off into a whisper.
"You must really like it there huh Kaoru-chan?" Suzume asked.
"Its my home Suzume. It's where I belong" she smiled.
Soujirou saw Suzume sadden. "What's the matter Suzume?" Soujirou asked.
"It's just, well, perfect. Why would an angel come back to this?" Suzume asked.
"Because angels are protectors. We are sent to make few happy. You and Yahiko and even Sou, being my family, makes me entitled to protect you with a light of goodness and its in my duty to make you three feel happy" she said…
"But we wont" came a cold voice.
"Yahiko" Kaoru whispered.
"It cant happen Kaoru. I mean you're dead. You're not real…" he paused, "you'll be there one moment in our lives and the next you're gone. Where will you be tomorrow morning? Yeh, that's right, at your home, in heaven not giving a damn about us. I don't want to hear it Kaoru, it isn't real, angels aren't real, heaven isn't real and God certainly isn't real" he shouted out. She could see tears falling down his face.
"Yahiko she whispered sympathetically.
"No Kaoru it's the truth. He isn't real…" he paused, "coz he took you from me when I needed you the most. I cried for you, I cried for him to take my pain away but he didn't…I can't believe in this thing called life anymore." He paused, "I'd do so much Kaoru…so much to have you again alive with us" he cried, "but some things can't happen" he trailed off into a whisper.
"Oh Yahiko" Kaoru stopped, going to him she held him to her, "Yahiko, my Yahiko, don't let the heart's pain blind you from the life you should live. God listens to you, but you denying him in your heart that he isn't real, that angels aren't real and that this thing call life isn't real, contradicts the reason you cry. When you cry Yahiko, angels hear you. All around your cries travel and we moan in pain to your soft cries. We hear it and what we try to do is comfort you. We sing you soft tunes in your ear and slowly we rock you into a sleep. We care Yahiko, we really do. So please little brother, I haven't forsaken you and so has God, we're there, just call us and we're alert anytime, any place. Got it?" she asked softly.
"Yeah, I got it" he looked up at her.
"Good, now lets go play some games" she smiled.
"Alrightt!" the group ran off to the parade.
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"Hit it Soujirou, hit it really hard" Suzume cheered Soujirou who was holding his painful knuckles.
"Suzume, this is a lot more painful in reality you know. I mean punching the target as hard as you can, for some stuff animal is such torture" he confessed.
"Men, such wimps these days" Suzume confessed.
Soujirou gathered his strength looking at the red and white bullseye. Taking a deep breath, he pulled back his hand and then went forward in a mighty speed. The weight flew up the vertical meter hitting the bell at the top of the game. Soujirou swore he broke his hand, 'oh the tortures from five year olds…'
"Congratulations son, you win a prize" he handed Soujirou a huge stuffed animal. A puppy to be exact. Soujirou humbly collected the animal giving it to the eager Suzume. The stuffed animal was probably bigger than her, so it was a bit humourous seeing her toll the huge animal.
Tonight was a night of wonder. To Soujirou he would make everything he ever wished come true. Tonight was his night to show the woman he loved how much he cared.
Yahiko and Kaoru stopped at the site of the café. Licking his lips, Yahiko felt his stomach call for the hot chocolate. "Could we you know, indulge in some hot chocolate?" Yahiko asked, eyes stuck to the café.
"Sure Yahiko, why not. Last one there is a rotten egg" Soujirou said.
Yahiko and Suzume ran for the door while Soujirou and Kaoru stayed back. They stayed close feeling the warmth of the moment. Soujirou would every now and then look at Kaoru, the way she'd fix her hair, the way she'd smile. Her smile, the one thing that he loved so dearly, always seem to give him minor heart-attacks.
"Is something wrong Sou?" she asked softly, the cold mist escaping her lips.
"No, of course not. Everything is perfect" he smiled. "Lets go inside" he smiled.
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The night was moving swiftly. The sounds of happy people were heard, as everyone remembered the smile and the face of their angel, Kaoru. She did quite a bit of talking, but they listened. It would be the last night they would have with her, so they might as well listen to her. From the café they headed off to the circus. Yahiko and Suzume got fairest-wheel tickets for the crew who was now waiting in line.
"Ughh! This is so boring" complained the little girl.
"Patience is a virtue" Kaoru said with a smile
"But this is so boring Kao-chan" the little girl fussed.
"Aww, well soon enough we'll be on the fairest wheel."
A couple of minutes waiting in the line, a sigh of relief was given off when it was their turn.
Kaoru sat in the center with Yahiko on her right, Suzume on her left and Soujirou next to the little girl.
As they went up, Suzume covered her eyes.
"Scary" she screamed.
"Shh, nothing will happen honey, I'm right here" Kaoru reassured, prying her sister's hands away. "Look Suzume, the world. The very beautiful world." She whispered.
"Is this how its feels in heaven?" Suzume asked
"It's as close as you could get." She whispered. "Angels see the world so clearly, so untainted and if you could see the world like this everyday, maybe you're a little angel too" she smiled.
Suzume looked up at her sister innocently.
Kaoru felt the little girl's stare.
"Something wrong sweetie?" she asked softly.
"I love you ane-chan" she hugged her sister, breathing in her scent of wild lilies. "So much" she whispered.
"I love you too koishii, so so much" she held her close to her.
"Kaoru, look!" Yahiko pointed off.
The both girls looked up. "It's a shooting star" Kaoru whispered.
"Wow, I never saw one" exclaimed Suzume. "It's beautiful…"
"Yeh, make a wish everybody" Yahiko said.
Everyone closed their eyes and wished upon the dying star.
"Amazing huh?" Yahiko looked at the heavens.
"Yeh, it is" Kaoru hugged her bro. Her brother and sister were soothed with her angelic wonder as they all looked up at the stars.
All the while Soujirou watched his beloved comfort her brother and sister. Even as an angel she was still her good ole self. Probably the greatest part about Kamiya Kaoru was the heart to never stop loving. Even in the afterlife she did her best to soothe her family's pains. Though the scar can't be cleansed with ease, she was trying nonetheless.
Her enchanting sapphire eyes averted slowly at Soujirou. He blushed.
"Everything okay Sou?" she asked.
"Yeh, everything's fine. Say, how about we do some dancing after this?" he asked.
"Sure, why not"
The fairest wheel completed a revolution with everyone laughing on their way down.
They were let off the contraption, running off to the Dance Cabin. A cabin where anyone can dance as they feel.
The entered the Cabin, people already dancing and boggying.
Soujirou pulled Kaoru by the hand, as they slow waltzed together. Imagining his own perfect Spanish mandolins playing with the violins and cuatros racing note after note, Soujirou focused his eyes on the beauty in front of him. Spinning her around in a perfect circle, he leaned her back into his arms before holding her once again.
Even Suzume and Yahiko danced some funky sixties music, everyone laughing and enjoying themselves.
The time, still cruel was counting down on the angel. The snow began to fall again, settling on the floors in white fury. Yet it didn't stop the partying inside. Everyone enjoyed themselves, loving the moment and sticking it in their memories for years to come. Soujirou could see Kaoru had the greatest night. Imagine, she never smiled like that in life. But now she is…
Kaoru and Yahiko danced while Suzume and Soujirou danced. They shook their bodies, giggling and laughing the night through.
Hours seem to go in just dancing and giggling. Suzume had stopped and so did Yahiko. They yawned going to the chair near the table. Suzume leaned her head against the table, her eyes slowly closing. Yahiko followed her suit, taking his night's nap.
Kaoru and Soujirou were left alone, dancing and still eager.
It was then Kaoru heard the huge bell on the clock. It was time to go.
"Soujirou" she whispered frantically.
"Yes, whats the matter?" he held her hand looking her in the eyes.
"I have to go" she whispered.
"No. Not now, no Kaoru, you just got here, don't leave us…" he begged.
"I have to go" she breathed.
With that she pulled away from his hands exiting through the door. Soujirou followed her, seeing that she was going to a tree. Standing there, she closed her eyes where two enormous misty white wings came out.
"You're leaving too soon. Your siblings would want to see this" Soujirou spoke.
"No, they've been through enough. Another departure is like another wound I inflict on them" she said
"What makes you think not telling them wont upset them?" he asked
"I have no choice Soujirou. This is the law of God" she spoke.
"Why can't you stay? Everything was going just fine" he started to raise his voice glaring at her. Hurt and pain was in his eyes.
"Soujirou, angels don't stay forever on Earth. Tonight was the night I chose to come to Earth and be with you all. Not all angels come to Earth, and in a sense I'm pretty lucky, so please, keep the memories we had alive" she whispered.
"But, you going…makes us alone again. How will everything work?" he leaned against the tree very distraught.
"Soujirou, oh my dearest Soujirou" she placed her hand on his cheek. "Please forgive me, but I have to go. I never leave you intentionally, but home calls. Besides Sou, I'll be always here, in your heart" she placed her hand on his chest.
"But you still don't know Kaoru, you still don't know" he whispered, his eyes trickling tears.
"Know what?" she cocked her head to the side.
"Th-that I love you?" he sounded so hopeless. "All I ever wanted Kaoru was to be with you and I never got it…" he turned away. "What am I suppose to do, just forget it, pretend you never existed in my mind? Noo, I loved you Kaoru I still do and I just can't kill the emotion like that" he whispered huskily.
Kaoru placed her hands around him, holding him to her.
"You are with me always Soujirou. I took the memory of you to the afterlife and I never forgot it. I don't think there's one possible way I can forget you. When I'm gone, I haven't really left you, because as I said, I'm here, in your heart." She paused, "I'd never do anything to hurt you Soujirou. I love you Sou…but I can't take you with me" she looked up at him.
"But I want to be with you" he looked down into her eyes.
"I know Sou, but there is a boundary between our worlds and we can't cross them until we have higher authority." She whispered, "let me go Soujirou" she whispered again
"No…" he held her tighter.
"It is time you do the right thing Soujirou. Let me go, I can't stay here anymore my love…heaven is calling all its angels, so please my darling, just let me go" she begged.
"I-I love you" he cried, "don't…d-don't do me this" he wept.
Wiping his tears away she kissed him softly on the cheek. "In the arms of an angel, fly away from here, from the stark cold winter, and the endlessness that you feel, you are born from the wreckage, of your silent reveries, in the arms of the angel..may you find some comfort here" she sang in a whisper.
She began pulling back.
Holding onto her hand, she smiled, her eyes glistening.
"May you find some comfort" she trailed off…
"I'm letting you go Kaoru, because I love you…and because I will have you again…" he paused, "thank you Kaoru, for everything" he whispered, tears still falling.
She cried.
"Good bye Sou, tell everyone I love them and I'll miss them dearly. For now my love, let the light be with you." She said. Her wings began ascending her, her hands still connected to Soujirou's own. They fingers pulled away to their last.
He looked up to see her going higher and higher…
"Good bye, my angel" he whispered.
And before he knew it, she disappeared under the snow of that late December night.
Looking down at the snow, he pocketed his hands in his pants before returning to the Cabin both Suzume and Yahiko remained. Opening the door, he looked up at the sky just one last time. There in the sky, a single star shone in all its beauty for him.
"Good night, angel" he said before heading in.
'May you find some comfort here' she whispers going to her home…
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Owari…
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An: a very bittersweet end huh? Yeh! Anyways, I hope you guys like it. There aren't much Soujirou and Kaoru fans but I happen to be one. I think they are rather cute. Anyways, thank you so much for reading and um, hope to see you guys some other time. Very sorry for the long wait, and go ahead, scream at me for it…I don't mine.
Thanks to all who've read. Please take care and God bless.
A blessed day to all.
…..Plz review….