"Isn't it ironic, that after all these years, we've turned into insomniacs?"
Ever the practical one, Kaddar Iliniat sighed deeply. "Kally, we're far from insomniacs."
Kalasin raised one eyebrow at him. "Oh? All right, then, explain to me why we haven't been able to sleep for the past week, despite the onslaught of situations that are enough to bore and exasperate us into a state of semi-comatose exhaustion normally?"
Kaddar opened his mouth, waiting for his mind to supply the customary pithy comeback. Nothing came, and Kalasin smirked at him. He glared at the wall, as if it was somehow responsible for the stresses of ruling a country.
Pulling herself out of her catlike position, curled up rather uncomfortably on a too-small armchair, the empress stretched and walked over to him. Without further ado, she collapsed into his lap, knocking the wind out of him, and waking up his stiff muscles in a rather unpleasant way.
"Ow!" In response to her laughter, he pulled a lock of her hair firmly. "That was quite unnecessary, I'll have you know."
"Fine. I apologize," was the haughty reply. The fact that her shoulders were shaking from repressed laughter quite ruined the effect.
After shifting to a position that didn't crush his arm, Kaddar promptly captured her wrists and pinned her to the back of the couch, ignoring her yelp of protest. "Talk fast, my lady."
"Why, what are you going to do to me if I don't?" Kalasin managed to gasp.
"Oh, I'll think of something. I could lock you in the dungeons, use you for the army's target practice, pull out your fingernails…I have a very active imagination."
Kalasin tilted her head to one side. "Hmm. You do know that we don't have dungeons, correct? And that the soldiers would openly rebel if they were forced to harm one hair of my lovely imperial head? As for the fingernails, well," she trailed off, regarding her fingertips thoughtfully. "I'm not sure about pulling them off entirely, but they do need a bit of a trim. Would you consider nibbling the ends very gently?"
Kaddar laughed in disbelief, releasing her. "You win, without a doubt."
"I've always been better at these games then you," she pointed out with a grin. Resuming her place in his lap, she wrapped both arms around his neck. "As the victor, I order you to help me fall asleep."
"How exactly am I supposed to do that? Force some sleeping potion down your lovely throat?"
Kalasin attempted a hurt expression. "That's…not what I have in mind."
"Then what do you have in mind?" he asked suggestively.
Kalasin pulled him up by one hand with a wicked smile. "Use that active imagination of yours, Kaddar." Pausing at the door, she turned back and looked at him flirtatiously. "I wouldn't be adverse to a few techniques of torture, either, if you would be so inclined."
"I think that I'll gladly take you up on that invitation."