Author's Note: For all those who tried to muddle through Kannon and her/his/itsmoods and forms, Ibeg your pardon. In researching her/he/it,the authors and scholars couldn't decide on it being male or female so that bled intothe story. I think it's oddly fitting that the closest thing you'll seeto Sesshoumaru's mate in my stories is a God. A little fyi, Kannon is the Japanese God/Goddess of Compassion, motherless children, childless mothers, and the ocean, specifically the storms. His/her/its name translates into "She who hears the cries of the world."

"Omnia mutantur,

Nihil interit."

- Neil Gaiman's "The Wake"

Chapter Three: Sparrow

Sesshoumaru awoke to the silent movements of a Japanese maid. He didn't know which part was more comforting about the woman; the fact she was a form and appearance that he was familiar with or the fact that she was quiet and behaved in such a way that was suitable when in presence of her betters. She glanced up through her hair at him, (she had been kneeling by his bed), blushed and returned dutifully to picking up his discarded robes and obi. He inclined his head and watched her from through the fur of his mantle as she tended to his clothes.

She ran her hands over the fine silk lovingly and with all the professionalism of one of her trade, and he almost smiled to see the way her eyes gleamed when she touched the fabric. Despite being in Kannon's service, the girl was still awed at such a beautiful thing.

And then, when she smiled softly at it, Sesshoumaru was struck with the feeling that he knew this human somehow.

She was somewhere just out of childhood, but not yet truly considered an adult even by her own kind. Her chin still held some of childish weight that all children seemed to held no matter the upbringing (indeed even Rin though he somehow doubted she had been well-kept in that village she had first stayed.) Her hair ran down her back as she worked; cut at several angles that framed her face. She was still blushing. He wanted to smile again. She was sweet.

He pushed up from the bed and let the covers fall from his body. He heard a small yelp from the maid and out the corner of his eyes saw her staring at his chest and stomach. Her eyes danced for a moment to his arm and he thought he saw compassion her dark eyes. She stood suddenly then, clothes folded under her arms and hurried to a place near the door where Kannon it seemed had laid out a fresh set of clothing for him.

He grimaced at the sight of the dark blue robes spilling out from the woman's hands. She held them to her chest and pushed out the sides holding it up for him. She met his eyes, blushed and looked upset with herself for doing such a thing before finding a corner of the floor to study and keeping her eyes fixed there.

He considered for a moment letting the woman attend him then dismissed the idea as vanity overtook his senses. She was human. He was Sesshoumaru. He pulled away from the bed and turned, displaying his back to the girl and ignoring her then as he cracked his knuckles and shook his head one side to another, letting his hair shag. He resisted the urge to push his arms over his head and pop his back. He was Lord of the Western Lands.

"Leave them." He told her.

The girl's expression passed between disappointment, fear and gratitude. She folded the robe again, let it rest against the chair before stepping away and walking to the bed. She pushed the covers and began to snap them crisply as she soothed over the bed. She leaned across the bed, tucking the opposite corners into place, putting herself in a very interesting position.

Sesshoumaru arched a brow and decided to take back his thoughts. "Leave."

She yelped again, turning and frowning. She didn't seem understand the word and he would not repeat himself. She looked frightened for a moment; she must have been concerned about upsetting him. Instead of balking or attempting to correct her actions, the maid nodded and bowed deeply before turning the corner of the bed again and pushing pass him towards the exit.

As she passed, her fingers lingered around his missing limb. She looked awed at his wound before continuing pass. He turned and watched her leave.

She was wearing a flower in her hair. He hadn't noticed before.

TC l2 "

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It was early when Rin awoke, and found a fresh bath waiting for her with a young woman waiting to dress her. The woman was human, though she was of a kind Rin had never seen before. The woman was as fair as Sesshoumaru, but flushed and freckled. A cascade of bright red fell in curls around her face, framing her wide green eyes. She had tattoos and a marking adorning all of her ivory skin, blue curls and swirls that dotted her arms, face and legs. She spoke to Rin in a voice all lyrical and kind, and kept referring to her as "colleen."

She had told Rin that when she was about Rin's age, she had been the daughter of a proud chieftain. He was murdered in war, and she and her mother had been taken as captives. She spoke of a harsh life that followed, until her lady Epona appeared to her one day and brought her to this palace. She had been there in faithful service ever since.

Rin smiled at the way the girl glowed. She laughed when the maid tickled her and splashed bubbles in her face. She scrubbed Rin till she was flushed and white, and then folded her into a crisp brown robe before smoothing Rin's hair out with an ivory comb and knotted it onto her head. She gave Rin a small mirror. Rin looked like the lady from the plains all sweet and delicate.

"Now," The woman said, as she turned Rin around, kissed her forehead and patted her behind towards the door. "The courtyard and palace are free to you. You will find many children your age who are eager for a new face. Should you need or desire anything feel free to ask anyone and you will not be denied."

"Thank you." Rin whispered, bowing deeply.

The woman smiled at her and inclined her head again. "I do have one request, little one."

"Anything, you've been so kind, I won't say no." Rin chirped and meant it.

The woman walked with Rin out into the hall and pointed one finger outside; pass the courtyard towards the deep green forests beyond. "The forest belongs to our lady's darker whims. I ask that you do not travel those paths unless your Master accompanies."

Rin looked up and fought down the urge to correct the woman. She had never considered Lord Sesshoumaru her Master; her patron, guardian and companion of course, but she was not his slave. Sesshoumaru himself had told her many times she was ruled only by what she desires. Do as you will, he told her, and expected her to follow. She had too. There was no reason to do otherwise.

Except now. She found herself thinking again of her Lord Sesshoumaru and found she felt cold and alone. She missed finding warmth in his memory, finding security in knowing that he would come for her, wait for her, watch for her. She was accustomed to him, and perhaps even submissive to him by her own consent because she had trusted him.

Now, because of Four Creeks, Rin found herself terribly alone.

There was never a time when she wanted Sesshoumaru more.

The woman's hands found Rin's cheeks as she gave Rin another kiss, soft and sweet on her forehead. The woman smiled sadly. "Don't worry, colleen." She purred. "You're home now."

Rin walked into the courtyard and watched as the people bustled around in daily activities. She saw women as black as the night in dresses of bright red, yellow and green that made their serious ink eyes gleam. There were those who were as fair and flush as the washing woman: some tattooed in similar blue, others clean and white robed. She saw girls colored like bronze with long sloping foreheads walk around in leather and blue stones.

"Where are all the boys?" She asked to no one in particular.

A brown skinned girl stopped and smiled. "When our lady desires men, they will come." She eyed Rin in a way that made her feel like she had said something foolish. "Why, dear one, so eager to fall backwards for a pleasing smile?"

Rin felt blood rush to her cheeks and she quickly skirted away from the woman, towards the edge of the courtyard. She had meant to find the stables and perhaps Ah-Un. They were really the only ones she felt she could trust. And then she heard it.

A flute.

The tone was slow but not sad, and sort of drifted through the air like a lazy summer. Rin pressed her ear to the wall to hear it.

It was coming from the forests.

She hadn't meant to wander off, Rin had had every intention of doing exactly what the lady and Sesshoumaru had wished for to do. But the music was low, somber and entrancing and quite by accident, before she knew what she was doing, Rin found herself deep within the forest in a clearing that where she found a young man sitting crossed leg on the floor, playing his flute.

He was young and Youkai. He was vaguely familiar, someone Rin had seen before perhaps in a dream or a cloud. He wore thick leather, something like armor and under it a robe of burnt gold that fell over his frame gracefully. He had long brown hair that whipped in a ponytail around his face and over his shoulder. His face was narrow and angular, with a small upturned nose and wide eyes hiding behind his bangs. The only thing truly compelling were his hands. Long, thin fingered, they ran up and down the length of the flute, weaving his melody. When he had done, he looked up from the flute and smiled at Rin.

"He's right." The man spoke. "You have my eyes."

Rin didn't answer. For a time, Rin and the man held each other in silence before he expelled a soft sort of laugh and inclined his head towards her.

"Hello." He greeted, softly. She again didn't move. The man seemed to hesitate then, searching for the proper means to continue on this course. "Hello there. Don't be afraid. I won't hurt you."

"Then why assure it?"

The demon seemed impressed and amused, he bowed his head in her direction. "You're right. I'm sorry." He patted his knee with his flute. "My name is Ryuhoji."

"Rin." She returned politely because she remembered that she should always be polite. Odd, how much she seemed to remember her mother's words here.

Ryuhoji nodded thoughtfully. "You have my eyes."

"What?"

"It's a compliment." He assured her, waving his hand. "It's just…unusual. I wonder if that's why he keeps you."

"Who keeps me?"
"Sesshoumaru." Rin inhaled sharply and looked away. Ryuhoji caught the action and lifted his chin. "He scares you." It was not a question nor a rebuke, just an observation that struck true and Rin nodded a little. The demon seemed to understand that. "Why does he scare you? He will not harm you."

"Can you promise that?"

"It is not mine to promise."

"You don't know Lord Sesshoumaru." Rin felt suddenly very guilty of thinking so coldly of her Sesshoumaru but fear overpowered her wisdom. Despite everything she tried to think of Sesshoumaru all she could see was Zen and Four Creeks. "He's a murderer. He's killed people."

"Yes, I know." Ryuhoji agreed softly.

"You know? About Four Creeks? About all those terrible things he did with Tama? He's done so much…"

"He is capable of much cruelty."

It was like a dam had broken over Rin's heart and all her fears and tears had suddenly burst from out her small frame. She fell to her knees, sobbing as the words spilled from her till she wasn't certain she even made sense at all. "He's supposed to protect me!" She shouted. "He wasn't supposed to do such evil things. He was supposed to be different! He's not like Tama. He's not like those evil men! He's my Lord Sesshoumaru! He's stronger then that. He's supposed to be my hero…"

Ryuhoji pushed up and took Rin into his arms. "I'm sorry, but he cannot do that, Rin. We are all slaves to our nature. Neither sword, nor victims' eyes can change that."

Rin pulled away from him. "I'm not his victim."

"Yes. You are. You know that too. Zen told you long ago."

"Zen tried to kill Sesshoumaru!"

"And you killed Zen to protect him." Ryuhoji returned calmly. "In that, you became Sesshoumaru's victim."

Rin stared at him. Everything in her was screaming to rebuke him. She just could not find the words. "Sesshoumaru was going to die. Tama wanted to kill me. He wouldn't let him. Sesshoumaru was going to die because he wouldn't let me die. He…"

"He was trying to protect you?" Ryuhoji drawled. He was giving her a searching look, as if trying to understand what all that made of her up and thus, maybe understand Sesshoumaru.

"He wouldn't let me die." She repeated forcefully, because that's all she knew and her mother told her never to exaggerate. "I couldn't let him die."

"Why?" Ryuhoji demanded. "After all, he was the butcher of Four Creeks. He killed for sport, for a whim and a dare."

"I couldn't let him die."

"Why?"

"I…couldn't."

Ryuhoji let his flute fall from his hands as he continued to stare deep into Rin. She shifted under his graze for a moment, but never retreated. "But you wish to leave him?"

"I have too." Rin said sadly. "I don't want to leave him but I'm so afraid. He's not my Sesshoumaru any more. I want to understand again. I want my Sesshoumaru back. I want to see him again. I don't want to be afraid anymore."

"Then don't."

Rin stopped, sniffled and rubbed her nose on his sleeve. Ryuhoji didn't seem to notice. She looked up at him expectantly.

"You really have no idea, do you?" Ryuhoji whispered. "Oh mortal child, I am so envious of you. You succeeded where I and others have failed. You are so important. Sesshoumaru invests so much in you, sacrifices so much in your name. Do not throw that away."

"I don't understand."

"You will." He told her. "In time." He seemed to smile then, like Jomei did when he was up to something. He reached over and put his hand over her cheek. He was cold, and reminded her of Zen. "Very soon, mortal child, Sesshoumaru will be face with a terrible cruel choice. He will have much need of you then. You must be strong, Rin."

Rin shivered then and looked away. "I don't want this…I just want it to be over." She moaned quietly.

"It will be." He promised. "For good or for bad, this will all be over soon."