Got the Life

Elizabeth woke to the sound of soft talking; having no idea about the time or even if another day had passed. As she slowly opened her eyes, she felt like she could handle anything given to her. She felt stronger than the last time she'd been awake. She immediately tested her newly found strength and sat up straighter, holding the edge of the bed with one hand, making sure she wasn't going to tumble out. Thankfully there was no-one around, in particular Carson, for she felt her head spin like crazy. She carefully tested her legs and got on her feet, swaying only a little still holding the bed firmly.

She wondered why she had thought John had turned back to his normal self. It was weird since he had had in fact tried to kill her, though when he was choking her she had seen something in his eyes, something she had recognized before she had blacked out. Maybe the reason was that he had brought her back to Atlantis, not leaving her to the mercy of the Genii, and he had killed Kolya.

Elizabeth took a small step forward, her feet tingling from the cold floor. She steadied herself and took another step until she suddenly heard Carson's stern voice behind her, and she hadn't even made it to the curtain yet. "Where do you think you're going?"

She managed a small reply, though her voice was till hoarse. "I need to see him!"

Carson stepped up next to her, catching her arm as she swayed again. "I'm sorry, Dr. Weir, but I cannot allow you to go anywhere but back into your bed."

Elizabeth pulled away, "I'm well enough, Carson," she moved forward, away from him. She so desperately wanted out of the infirmary that she was more than willing to risk a chance to get sedated again. After all there were memories, feelings and facts that needed her attention; she was the only one who could do something about them.

Carson wasn't just going to give in and stepped right in front of her, effectively blocking her way.

"Please Carson, I have to see him. I need to speak with him."

Carson felt his heart sink at Elizabeth's pleas. He had never seen so much pain in her eyes as he saw now. She was so badly trying to convince him while he and the others had yet to figure out what had happened between her and the Major when John had taken her.

Since her verbal pleas didn't seem to be working much she once again tried to walk passed him, but Carson stopped her. Elizabeth knew Carson meant well, but she knew that if John was really back she would be the one person who could convince him that the atrocities he committed as Ignatius weren't his fault. She was positively sure that the reality of what had happened to him and what he had done while being Ignatius were going to be a severe shock.

Elizabeth knew that if that were the case, then John Sheppard would never forgive himself. And they hadn't come this far to loose him in the end. Elizabeth pulled her final card as she looked straight at Carson, "Carson, please, I just need to see him. I'll be down at the brig for only a few minutes. Please?" She kept staring at him, wondering briefly what was going through his mind. "Please, say something? If you want, you can sedate me until the end of next month but please, just let me see him."

"Elizabeth, as much as I would want to le you go and see him. We don't know how Major Sheppard is doing mentally right now. We don't know how he will react to your presence. Ignatius may not like it," Beckett tried his best to persuade her it was better to wait a while longer, so Kate Heightmeyer had a chance to see him first. And since she was going to need some time to recover, Weir would get some well-earned rest too.

"But that's the thing Carson, there is no more Ignatius. You have to believe me!"

Carson seemed to be thinking about it, though he was still against her going down to the brig. Elizabeth wasn't fit for anything right now, but before he could form a reply, Rodney walked in, "I'll go with her."

Elizabeth and Carson were both startled, but before Carson could give Rodney a solid reason to restrict Elizabeth from seeing the Major, Rodney tackled him with a reason she should see the Major. "Ever since he came back, he hasn't had any outbursts, no threats, not even a request. Nor has he talked in anyway like Ignatius."

Carson threw Rodney a skeptical look, "What if he's faking it? He's done it before."

Rodney shook his head lightly, "I don't think so, not this time."

"What makes you think that?" Carson asked.

"If he was faking it, by now he would have gotten tired of the show. Instead, if you go talk to him, Sheppard will only say how much he deserves to be where he is now."

Carson nodded almost unnoticeable, "Ok, but no longer than ten minutes, got it?" He turned to face Elizabeth again, "After that I want you back up here."

Elizabeth nodded eagerly and Rodney helped her into a wheelchair, wheeling her out of the infirmary and straight down to the brig. They moved in silence, though Rodney wanted nothing else but to ask her what had happened when John had taken her. But he decided against it, since it wasn't the time or the place to ask her, not yet anyway.

When they arrived at the cell, John was still sitting on the floor, still staring off into space. But once he caught sight of Elizabeth out of the corners of his eyes, he got up and stared at her. There was no anger in his eyes, but sadness and guilt.

Elizabeth had colorful bruises on her face and in her neck where his hands had made contact. Her nose was still a bit swollen and he had been right assuming he had broken it. John whispered, "I thought you were dead," he looked around the room and lowered his head, repeating even more softly, "I thought you were dead."

Elizabeth didn't say a thing but her face was set. She looked up at Rodney and broke the silence, "Open the cell!"

Everyone, including John, looked at her in surprise. Rodney grabbed her shoulders, "What are you doing? Have you lost your mind? We're still not sure about his..."

Elizabeth pulled away from Rodney, "You're not, but I am. Now..." She almost glared at the guards, "...I order you to open the door."

Her order went through this time and the airman in charge opened it up. Once the door was open, John stayed frozen on the spot. He just stared at Elizabeth, amazed that she would take such a risk when he couldn't even trust himself.

She didn't move at first, but after a moment she slowly got up out of the wheel chair and walked inside the cell, not even swaying once. Rodney kept close behind her just in case her legs suddenly decided to give out from under her. Elizabeth walked straight towards John and slapped him in the face. Everyone was stunned by her actions. But no one even dared to move when she did it again.

John didn't react in any sort of way.

When she was done slapping him, Elizabeth continued, "That is for what you did." She waited a moment, "Who are you?"

John stared at her, a bewildered expression on his face. When she noticed he wasn't going to answer, Elizabeth slapped him again, "I asked you a question! Who are you?"

John didn't know what she was doing but if he wasn't going to answer quickly, he would be receiving another slap. He could still feel her hand on his cheek, and when he saw another slap coming, he grabbed her wrist halfway. Not too hard, as not to hurt her but to stop her. Within seconds every soldier in the room had its gun pointed at John.

Elizabeth's heart-rate doubled in speed and she had to admit that she felt pretty scared for a moment. But when he spoke, she relaxed. His words came out softly and there wasn't a sign of anger or confusion in his face, "Major John Sheppard, United States Air Force... do you want my serial number too?"

Elizabeth relaxed and for a moment she felt like she could accomplish anything until she felt Rodney's arms steady her. "I should get you back to the infirmary. Don't want Beckett to sedate you again to force some rest onto you." Rodney started pulling her back out of the cell and into the waiting wheelchair.

She looked straight into John's eyes, and then addressed the guards, "Take him to his quarters and place a guard in front of his door."

With that Elizabeth allowed Rodney to fuss over her and wheel her back to the infirmary and the warmth of her bed and a few hours of rest. Before they left she looked at John one last time. "You won't be punished for what happened, but... I hope you understand, John. The guards will be with you for a while, and I hope you're up to it. There's a job to be done in Atlantis, a job that you're meant to do."

As the words sank in, she and Rodney left, leaving a very confused John Sheppard in her wake.