Hope
The jewel that cannot be stolen
The next 48 hours were chaotic. Several dead officers were found in the holding cells and in 'interrogation' rooms. The injured were beamed to sickbay and the converted shuttlebay, the ship's medics performing emergency surgery under intense pressure. No one was willing to take any rest, instead using rather strong stims to stay awake and alert.
The Ambassador class, USS Exeter was overcrowded. 493 survivors were found, 107 in critical condition. The Aurora left Earth, six months ago with 581 onboard.
About nine hours they were beaming onboard, Alice was separated from Stryker when they went in for their own operations. The last thing he remembered hearing was, "tempature twenty-eight point two, pressure ninety over fourty, pulse one-thirty three, severe dehydration. He's in bad shape." followed by the soft hiss of a hypospray. The need to sleep was suddenly overwhelming.
Some time later, he sensed a soft presence all around him and opened his eyes. An old lime-haired man looking utterly exhausted, stepped around his biobed. "Doctor, he is coming to."
A woman approached him. "How do you feel ?"
Stryker sat up. "Numb ... and confused."
He shivered involuntarily. "And cold, the room tempature is too low."
"You've been unconscious for almost nine hours, and I had to revive you to ask you some questions. You have some medical ... anomolies I can't figure out."
"I tried contacting your homeworld, but we are out of comminications range with Deep Space Nine." she told him.
He was slightly confused, "Something wrong with me ?"
"My name's Penny, by the way. Doctor Lehne, actually, but don't bother with formalities." she said as handed him a small hand mirror.
Stryker took the mirror and looked into it. His reflection showed his usual bold scaly green head, but a dozen silver scales now graced his forehead, the rogue scales also running along his 'hairline', down his neck and around his ears and eyes. Looks like a creepy infection, or insect bites.
He was a little shocked. "I am not sure. Might be an allergic reaction of some kind." he finally said.
"Do you know how to deal with it ?"
"No."
His vision blurred and he tried blinking again to clear his vision. "mmm... Penny, something wrong with my eyes."
She put her hand into her lab coat and pulled out a medical tricorder. "This appears to be related to your silver scales. I need to check your medical files again. I will be right back."
She returned a few minutes later. "I found the underlaying problem. You are allergic to Retinox and otherwise immune to similiar medications. So we have to resort to some old fushioned solutions." She walked over to the replicator, ordered something before returning.
"Here, drink this." she handed Stryker a cup of yellow, sickly looking liquid. He took it gratefully, enjoying the mug's warmth in his hands before taking a sip, then made a face. "It's bitter," he said.
"I know, but it's also good for you," Penny replied. "I know I sound like someone's mother. Next thing you know, I'll be telling you to eat your vegetables."
"I don't mind." he replied, taking another sip of the bitter liquid.
"Its a joke only humans would understand, I guess."
"No, I get it. I too had a few adventures in babysitting."
"I guess some things are truly universal." she laughed.
Ice water had settled in the pit of his stomach when he thought about her, he was worried. "How is Alice doing ?" Stryker asked.
"Who ?" she asked.
"Alice Sharon Brangwin."
Penny ran a mental checklist of patients named Alice. She remembered the red haired one, Moderate injuries and two concussions. "She will make a full recovery, but needs a lot of rest in the meantime." she paused. "Speaking of rest, you need it too."
"I will take it easy."
"Promise ?"
He nodded. His stomach felt upset. Penny picked up his discomfort somehow, "Your stomach is feeling a little upset, isn't it ?"
He nodded again. Penny smiled, "We injected everyone with Purge, to clean the foreign drugs out of your system. So you might feel a little disorientated once in a while. Sorry I can not sit and talk. My work is far from over. I got to get going." she sighed. "And before I forget. The captain scheduled a meeting for the Aurora's crew. Tomorrow at 1900 hours."
"What is his name ?" he inquired.
"Captain Lore Drakon. Very tall, can't miss her."
Semper Fidelis, Alice
That night, he had been up all night sitting here, waiting for Alice to wake up. Her hair was now combed and her appearance less fatigued.
It was not until about midnight that she finally stirred, and at first Stryker was excited, but then watched in dismay as she turned in fitful delirium for the rest of the night. Many of the things she said in her sleep were incoherent, and Stryker could not make out what they meant.
Being awake for twenty hours straight gave him too much time to reminiscence. The damn orange lights on the walls is giving me a headache, he decided.
Seven hours later, the dimmed lights indicating the night side shift, lit up again to normal strength. Another hour passed when the intercom chirped, "Ensign Vallance to Stryker."
He walked over to the wall panel and touched the appropriate button in the top left corner. "Yes sir ?"
"Please come to Surgery Suite two, its urgent."
Brooding
Stryker returned to sickbay two hours later. He nodded to Juliet and MRess, talking to each on the far side of the room. I wonder how much she'd eventually remember. He had to correct himself. Stryker learned earlier her name is Jessie, not Juliet.
He'd quickly become self-conscious about the silver scales on his head and started wearing a purple bandanna. He briefly stared at Alice sleeping on a biobed. Feeling queasy, Stryker sat down at the window, staring blankly out into space.
Alice had been awfully quiet since this whole thing ended. It bothered him. What has going on inside her mind ?
He knew the last few days took an immeasurable toll on everyone. Captain Holden was on the war path, talking on subspace nearly every waking moment, crusading Starfleet's admirals to take measures against the Romulans for the brutality they laid down on her and her crew.
He mentally brushed aside what he remembered about the torture. The pain, anger and the madness proved very persistent though. Councilours be damned, these memories that needs to be buried deeply and hopefully forgotten.
He considered himself fortunate. Although 'losing' her brought him to the brink of deep despair, he simply wanted to die, but she also saved him in the end. She is his only anchor to reality and sanity. Every moment she was out of his sight was another instant his life hung precariously balanced between happiness and painful oblivion.
After a while, he noticed movement reflected in the glass. She sat up slowly, rubbing her forehead with one hand, trying to clear her blurred vision. Finally, her eyes cleared and she looked around.
He turned around. "Alice!" Stryker scolded, "You should be resting."
"Quiet you, " she said playfully, a strand of hair drifting across her forehead. He walked over to her and sat down on her bed. She lightly placed her hand over his. He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "See, I told you not to worry." Alice smiled.
"Since when have I ever listened ?"
"True..." she laughed. "Hey what's with the silver spots ?"
"Some kind of allergic reaction." he said. Alice had a feeling he felt ashamed of his silver spotted appearance. Stryker picked up a bandetta and fit it over his head.
"How are you feeling ?" he asked.
"Mmmm... sort of... muddled," she said, touching her head with her other hand. Her expression softened somewhat as she met Stryker's troubled gaze. "I am not the only one who needs to take it easy for a while," Alice teased.
He did not reply; his thoughts were elsewhere. Alice touched his face, he looked at her. "Brooding again ?"
He nodded in response, his face solemn. "Wiuen is dead."
The other three shared a collective gasp and the room fell silent. MRess was the first to speak. "Well, I'm certain the Great Light is enjoying his wit now."
"Groaning at it would be more like it." Stryker said, trying to smile, but failing. "He was a great friend ... "
A nurse entered the room and started checking the readouts on everyone's biobed. "How I am doing ?" Alice asked when he reached her bed.
"Recovering nicely, if not a little slower than excepted. Please do not get up until tomorrow."
"I will try." Alice told him.
Tortured Soul
She pulled herself back into the corner, drawing her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them protectively, beginning to rock back and forth in the darkness, sobbing.
Make it stop... make the hurting stop... please... I'm sorry ... I'm sorry ... I'm sorry. Make it stop... make the hurting stop...
When he returned to sickbay, MRess and Jessie had already left. Alice sat bolt upright in bed, annoyed by an odd feeling, sitting in her gut. "Where is Mouse ?" she inquired.
"Mouse is in private quarters."
His expression shifted and he sighed to brace himself. "She had some problems during surgery." Stryker explained. Alice felt dread and near panic. Her best friend was nowhere to be seen. "She should have stayed in bed longer, but sometimes I think that she is more stubborn than I am." he said.
"If that's possible." she smiled at him. He knew where this was leading to. The doctor told her to stay in bed until tomorrow, but he knew this was more important to her. "I must see her."
He nodded. Alice and Stryker exited the sickbay and took the turbolift on deck ten.
They walked down the corridors toward the guest quarters where Mouse was staying. Alice pressed the door chime button.
No response. She noticed the door was not locked and pressed another button to open the door. Alice stepped forward cautiously, "Hello ?"
"Go away !"
The first thing Stryker noticed, when they entered her quarters, is the room was a mess, in complete disarray. Everything including pieces of furniture was knocked over and the lights were dimmed. Stryker whistled, noticing the devastation. "Temi Shrint, what did you do to your quarters ?" Alice asked, concern showing in her voice.
"What do you want ?" Mouse asked crossly. His eyes scanned the room, the source of the voice come from a grey silhouette in the darkness. Mouse deliberately kept her back to the door. It did not matter what Alice said, Mouse is not listening.
Alice nodded for him to follow her. They walked across the room towards Mouse. Just behind Mouse, a hoverchair was on its side, several dents present on its dull silver panels. Mouse's face was drawn, pale; dark circles beneath her dark pink eyes.
"Come out, Mouse," Alice said softly, walking ahead of Stryker. They sat down on the opposite side, now face to face with Mouse. "Come out of the dark."
"I ... " Mouse faltered, for the first time. This set off alarms in Alice's head. "I ... I thought I was doing okay with all this ... I was holding out hope that I just dreamed it, what they did to me never happened."
Mouse paused. "I looked in the mirror, and... I couldn't take it anymore. I was violated. VIOLATED !" Mouse went on and on, ranting and cursing. That explains the devastation, at least. Stryker thought.
Mouse lowered her voice, "I started having these dreams. Every time I sleep, I was back there, and I was hurting, and I couldn't... I couldn't stop them. Everytime I close my eyes, they were waiting for me, just picking up where they left off ..."
Stryker realized Mouse was being driven insane by memories of what happened during her ordeal with Tal'Shair interrogators, and might be thinking of taking her own life. He had to help.
Alice sighed, her face pale, concerned. "So you stopped sleeping."
Mouse didn't answer, gaze dropping as her shoulders slumped. She drew a hand over her face. "I think... I think I am going insane."
"Oh, Mouse. I can relate, even though you are a pain in the ass, because... " Alice faltered, only now feeling the wetness on her cheeks. Alice wavered, "Because ... You're the best friend I ever had, and crash it, I'm not going to let you give up on yourself over this!"
Mouse stared at Alice for a second, then found herself breaking eye contact, trying to take what she just said in. For a while, the only sound in the room was Mouse's shaky intakes of breath. "I'm scared, Alice... " She bit her lip. "I hate myself," she finally said. "Look at that they did to me. I might never walk again."
Mouse was crying, her lips moving, but she was no longer talking. Stryker learned earlier that the Romulans crudely operated on her spine in an attempt to understand her strong telepathic abilities. The Romulan scientist she mindbrushed was trained to resist a full Vulcan mindmelt, but Mouse broke through the 'barrier' effortlessly.
Alice felt devastated, the tears blurred her sight, and she sniffed, wiping her face with the back of a hand. Stryker was not sure what to do or what to say. Alice was at a real loss of words too. He thought hard and fast before speaking up "We will get through this, Mouse."
Stryker tried to smile, but feared its not nearly as comforting as he hope it to be. "These things will all pass, and though we bear their scars."
His voice tone changed, "None of us deserve what happened to us over there. We have just got to learn to deal with it. Easier said than done, though. You have friends, and we are here for you." Now, he spoke as clearly as Niero, carrying calm wisdom in his assurances.
Alice noticed a very small change in Mouse's demeanour, a look of hope settling in on her marred features. "Thanks. I did not know you cared." Mouse said.
"Anytime." Stryker smiled weakly. Alice wiped some of her tears and looked at Stryker, and their eyes locked. Thanks Stryker.
He nodded slightly and returned to Mouse. "Does this mean you will stop calling me, lizard breath ?"
Mouse paused to consider something, then smiled, "I wouldn't dream of it."
Earthbound
The Exeter's captain, Lore Drakon met with the gathering of able bodied crew from the Aurora. "What is going to happen to us ?" one of the engineers asked.
Captain Drakon addressed the crowd, "The Exeter is heading back to Earth, we will reach it in just under 28 days from now. Anyone who has family in Sector 001, who will be in communivations range in two days. Starfleet is unable to send another ships."
"But this ship is overcrowded." someone in the crowd mentioned.
"I know." Captain Drakon answered. "For the time being, most of you will move into crewquarters, shared with my officers. The quartermaster will soon have everyone assigned to a room."
"What have the Romulans done to us ?" a Betazoid woman asked.
Captain Drakon looked uneasy, but answered the Betazoid's question, "From what we gathered so far, they first injected everyone with psychotropic and brainwashing drugs, then suspended in Total Sensory Depravation chambers. Some kind of mind programming was created, with the goal of causing nightmares. Once the psyche is broken down, mind-probes is used."
Drakon fell silent for a few seconds, "My staff is trying to undo the damage. My CMO tells me less than 20 of you can remember what happened over there in detail."
Stryker stood up, was he feeling tired and headed to the quarters, Doctor Penny shared with him and Alice.
Relapse
With her shift over, Deanne pressed the button to summon the turbolift to the bridge.
When the doors opened, she saw Stryker lying on the floor, his eyes still open. She tapped her combadge, "Medical emergency! Turbolift two. Deck seven." Deanne said, entering the lift and sending it down to sickbay on deck 7.
Penny scanned Stryker. "Dammit, I cannot explain this, but the Memory-Beta in his system has not dissipated like it should." Further medical scans revealed new brain damage. "Nurse put a cortical stimulator on him!"
Penny desperately tried to understand the cause, but nothing come to her. "Sickbay to bridge."
"Is there something I can for you Penelope ?" Commander Wrenner responded.
"Benjamin, I have a stubborn patient in critical condition down here. Contact Deep space Nine for me please, I need them to relay medical files from the Edenian homeworld."
"What are you looking for ?"
She sighed to recollect her thoughts. "Inquiry all data threads on healing, head injuries and foreign chemical neutralisation."
"Task me and you shall have it."
Penny looked at her patient, "Thanks. Sickbay out."
Eight hours later.
The medical crew finally got their urgently needed sleep after five very long days. Only two patients were left in sickbay. The Mark three EMH cheerfully greeted Penny when she entered sickbay. "Good morning doctor."
"Morning Demi." Penny noticed a vast number of data and images flashing past on the monitors. "What is this ?"
"The file you requested. Its a really big one too. I am analysing it now." she said.
"How long will it take ?"
Demi comminicated with the computer. "About an hour. There is a coffee on your desk. I had a feeling you needed it."
"You're an angel Demi."
Long road to recovery
Penny helped Mouse sit up and swing her legs over the side of the bed, then attached motor assist bands on Mouse's legs. Alice was standing nearby.
She put both feet flat on the floor and stood up. Then Mouse could feel it - a nauseating twist in the bottom of her stomach. She felt dizzy - which was not helped when the floor lurched beneath her feet and she staggered, giving a small cry as she fell.
Penny picked her up and helped her back onto bed. Mouse shallowed hard, fighting down a wave of nausea. "Take it easy." Penny said.
Her progress was slow going. Everytime she stumbled, or fell, her newfound temper flared. "Dammit! I'll never get this." Mouse said as she slowly struggled to her feet.
"You will get it. Just take your time." Alice watched as she tried, failed, then tried and failed again. "I will be back in a bit, " Penny said as she left the room.
A minute later she returned and handed a walking stick to Mouse, "Here you go, this may help."
"I can't believe this; using a walking stick at my age." she shook her head but accepted it nonetheless.
"You will only need it for a few days." Penny reasurred her.
Alice, Penny and Mouse spent many long hours in the therapy room. Sometimes Ray would come to help, but mostly it was Penny and Alice. The medical staff was scared of Mouse and refused to help work with her. Amazingly enough, Penny put up with Mouse's rages, her cries of frustration.
The next day they had left Mouse in the room alone for a few minutes. Unknownest to the doctor, Mouse became so frustrated and angry that she proceeded to completely destroy the physical therapy room. By the time Penny and Alice arrived, three members of the security team was standing guard inside, two more outside.
Captain Lore Drakon arrived next and looked at the damage she'd done. Equipment was everywhere. The wall mirrors had all been smashed. Mouse had taken a ten kilogram freeweight and heaved it into a therapy machine. The captain should have been furious with Mouse, but she wasn't.
She must have realized how frustrated Mouse was because she just ordered security to leave. When Mouse saw the captain, she felt ashamed. "I'm sorry sir." she felt drained at the display of anger. The captain said nothing and left. From then on, Penny never left her alone in the therapy room.
In the still Darkness
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"Semper Fidelis" means "Always Faithful (to you)" in Latin.