Chapter 3
Obi-Wan awoke alone mid-morning. He stretched lazily and was glad that it had not been him to leave Qui-Gon to wake up alone. The morning sun was high in the sky and he relished its warmth as it bathed the bed in light. He snuggled into the blankets, glad of a soft bed and clean sheets.
'Are you ever going to get up?' Qui-Gon's amused voice sounded in his mind.
'I was considering it.'
'I don't know, a perfectly good knight spends five years from his master and he goes soft.'
Obi-Wan snorted and struggled up from the bed. He went to the fresher for a quick shower, grabbing his travel pack as he passed. He had left it by the front door when he had seen Qui-Gon in meditation the night before. His old master must have moved it as he slept. Part of Obi-Wan was pleased to know he felt safe enough to sleep through Qui-Gon's movements, but the Warrior part of him was faintly disturbed by it.
'What are you doing?' he asked through the half-formed bond as he stepped into the shower.
'Showing Anakin around the Temple. Then I have to meet with the Council.' Obi-Wan could sense Qui-Gon desperately trying not to think of Obi-Wan naked, in the shower, alone, as he spoke. 'Do you have plans?'
'I'm going to see Mace and then Bant later and then will probably join you for your session with the Council.'
'Do they know that?'
'No.' Obi-Wan grinned, enjoying being able to share his humour with someone else. 'Don't tell them.'
'Wouldn't dream of it.'
Obi-Wan dressed in his last clean uniform, deliberately catching a glimpse of his naked body in the mirror and allowing Qui-Gon to see it.
'Anakin is calling, I'll speak to you later.' There was regret and relief in Qui-Gon's voice.
Obi-Wan ate a quick, late first meal and then he made a request to stores to send him some new tunics, leggings and other clothing as well as to send up his personal belongs that would have been put into storage upon his 'death'. They would be delivered by evening meal. He then turned to other matters, which included that shadow that still hung low on the planet.
"This everything?" the Shadow asked Mace, glancing through the data pad the councillor had completed of the events on Coruscant within the last week. Mace had been a little surprised when Obi-Wan had come to his office; face-to-face meetings were not their usual way of exchanging information.
"Right down to the times of maintenance repairs."
"Good."
After leaving Qui-Gon's quarters, Obi-Wan had sought Mace out in his office, knowing that the master would have gathered the information he had requested. The office was light and airy, like much of the temple. Mace's window faced westward and Obi-Wan wondered if that was my accident or by default. He knew Mace liked to work from dawn until dusk; was the sight of the sinking sun a sign to the master of a day of hard work done?
"What do you hope to find?" Mace looked at the Jedi that sat before him. To the untrained eye he looked like any other Jedi, but to Mace he was cast both in Darkness and Light; a physical joining of the two side of the Force.
"I don't know… a reason?"
Mace nodded, even though the answer given meant nothing to him. He had learnt quickly, as had the rest of the Council, not to push Obi-Wan. He would speak when he was ready or simply act first and report to the Council after. There were millions of details on the list and Mace hoped amongst them was the something that would aid his friend.
"How's Qui-Gon?" he asked, hoping to catch the knight unawares as he skimmed through the data pad.
"Subtle, Mace, really."
"I wasn't trying for subtle."
"Mind your own business."
The whole time they had been talking, Obi-Wan's mind had been entirely focused on the information he was reading, not on what Mace was saying.
"It is my own business." This, as last, got Obi-Wan's attention. The young man looked at the Council member incredulously.
"How?"
"Two dear friends of mine are hoping to bond, one of them happens to be a maverick field agent and the other is a rogue."
Obi-Wan nodded, conceding the point.
"On top of that," Mace continued, "one of them has recently taken a new padawan who happens to be the Chosen One."
"So, just to clarify," Obi-Wan said, looking at Mace in such a manner that was not designed to put the older Jedi at ease, "Are you asking as a friend or as a member of the Council?"
"Force damn it, Obi-Wan."
Usually Obi-Wan would take great delight at being one of only a few people who could rile the usually unflappable master, but the subject of Qui-Gon and himself and their bond was too serious a matter.
"It's complicated," was all he would admit to.
"Funny, he said exactly the same thing."
Obi-Wan lifted his brows in question.
"I bumped into him and Anakin in the library when I was down there loading your data."
"Oh." Obi-Wan put the pad down and steepled his hands in a mirror image of the other Jedi; a side effect of being connected in such a way to the other Jedi was that he found that he picked up the mannerisms and personality traits of those he was physically close to or in tune with. This, in part, was why he fought so hard to maintain his own dry humour and tormented the Council; he knew these traits were his own and that with their presence he knew his personality was not being swallowed up by the other Jedi. "As a friend then…"
A moment of silence followed as Obi-Wan thought how best to tell Mace.
"The love part, that's easy," he explained. "That part was always easy, but Anakin, myself and the bond are not things that merge very well together."
"How so?"
Obi-Was was lost inside his own mind as he thought out the future he would share with Qui-Gon.
"I worry I will lose myself in Qui-Gon; he's so strong. I worry that I'll get myself killed or won't be there to save him or Anakin. I worry about the cloud that still lingers over the boy."
He paused to think on other fears.
"I am afraid for the Jedi and the Republic. I am afraid that I'll have to choose between duty and love and that I do not know if I am strong enough to choose."
"Are these fears of a man or the Jedi protector?"
"I don't know, and that is what scares me the most."
"That is a lot of fear for one Jedi."
"I know, and mostly I don't notice it. My senses drown out any reservations I may have and I follow the Force's guidance, but when I am alone and have nowhere to go, I am left wondering at what the future will be and my part in it."
Obi-Wan looked into Mace's eyes and for the first time Mace saw the anguish hidden beneath the Jedi's cool veneer.
"What if the bond becomes a hindrance?" Obi-Wan whispered and Mace was instantly reminded of when Obi-Wan had first discovered his destiny and the uncertainty he felt and the assurance he has sought in his master's old friend.
"Do you really believe that it will?"
"I feel," dizziness swept though Obi-Wan's mind. The future of the bond was hidden from him; too much lay between for any real truths to emerge. "I feel joy within it, but I think somewhere there is great sadness; pain worse than death."
"You have no idea what it is?" Mace prompted, hoping to gain further insight into what was burdening his friend's thoughts so severely.
"None."
"Obi-Wan, the Force gave you a gift, you and Qui-Gon both. You trusted the Force all your life, followed the path it lay before you, are you really going to desert it now?"
Obi-Wan looked shocked and insulted.
"No, of course not, I just wonder is all."
He rose from the chair and walked from Mace's office, absent-mindedly scrolling though the data pad once more. Mace watched him go, his feelings of unease growing.
'At least he used the door like normal people,' he thought, although, truth to tell, he would have felt more reassured if the young knight had done his usual appearing and disappearing act.
"Mace?"
"Yes Obi-Wan?" he replied to the knight who had stealthily returned, though he had still used the door.
"I told you as a friend."
"And if I asked as a member of the Council?"
"Then you'd be removing the hilt of your lightsabre from your throat." As he left, Mace was not entirely sure if he was joking, however the meaning was clear: the bond was off limits to the Council. Mace cringed at the thought of the confrontations that were sure to follow.
"Bant."
"Obi-Wan!" Bant shrieked in greeting, throwing her arms around her oldest friend. She had been resting, recuperating from her most recent mission, when her door chimed. She opened it to find a familiar face smiling a little uncertainly at her.
As Obi-Wan felt Bant's arms go around him he automatically returned the embrace. After only an instant he relaxed into his friend's arms and simply held his friend who he had not seen for five years. Qui-Gon had been right, there had been no need to worry, being with Bant was as easy as it had been when they were children.
"Come in, come in."
Obi-Wan followed the other knight into her quarters, glancing around as he did so. They resonated with his friend's life force, and her calming presence was abundant within the apartment's walls.
"I should call the others, let them know you are here."
"No," Obi-Wan quickly objected, not sure if he could managed all his old friends at once. "I am not sure I am ready for Garen and Reef yet."
Bant nodded her understanding, seeing the momentary flash of uncertainty in Obi-Wan's eyes.
"I'm glad you are here," she told him as they sat down. "Where have you been, Obi-Wan?"
Obi-Wan did not want to lie to his crèche mate; they had been through so much together, however he could not tell her the whole truth either. So, instead he settled on telling her nothing at all and hoped she would understand.
"I'm sorry Bant, I can't talk about it and even if I could, I don't think I'm ready to."
"I understand." And the Calamarian Jedi did. A Jedi's life was difficult and at time harsh on those sent out to fight for the innocent in a galaxy that was unforgiving. Instead they spoke of other things, Bant taking pleasure in being able to impart to Obi-Wan five years worth of gossip. When it came time to leave it was Obi-Wan that pulled Bant into his arms.
"Thank you," he whispered into her ear.
"I'm your friend, Obi-Wan."
"I know," Obi-Wan said, thanking the Force for the gift of his friend. "I will see you later."
"Settling in you are, little one?" Yoda asked Anakin.
"Yes, Master Yoda."
This Council session was more to do with procedure that any real need for a debriefing; most of the Council had been on Naboo and the defeat of the Trade Federation and the Sith had all been discussed while still on the planet. As far as Qui-Gon could see, the point of the audience was to check up on him and his new charge. His irritation was moderated by the knowledge that they did it out of concern for him and the boy. The presence of the young man who stood at the back of the Council chamber did not hurt his patience any, either.
Obi-Wan had not spoken since he had entered shortly after the master-apprentice pair. He had not said anything, but his presence was felt nonetheless. He stood, not really focusing on any one thing or person. He glanced at all those gathered, spent some time studying the polished marble floor and staring out the large glass windows that offered a panoramic view of the city's skyline. There was, however, no doubt that he missed nothing.
"We have learnt no more of the mystery of the Sith," Mace told them solemnly.
"Knight Kenobi is certain that it was the apprentice he killed."
"I concur," Qui-Gon said.
"Know nothing of this creature we do, or its interest in the Naboo. Be wary we must."
Qui-Gon felt as though they were going over old ground. He knew Obi-Wan felt the same when a picture popped into his head of the entire Council taking part in the solstice games, which were traditionally used to train padawans to not fret on things that were out of their control. Obi-Wan's version, however, had all twelve members in various compromising positions.
'Bored, Obi-Wan?'
He did not get an answer. He did, however, feel a wave of anger from his bondmate. He tuned back into the Council's conversation and realised they were discussing their relationship; his and Obi-Wan's and their still incomplete bond.
"Padawan Skywalker?" Obi-Wan spoke for the first time. "Please kindly wait outside for your master."
"Yes, Knight Kenobi," the boy dutifully answered and left the mature Jedi alone, unable to help glancing behind him as he left, curious as to what Obi-Wan did not want him to hear.
"Well?" Yarael Poof prompted after his departure.
Qui-Gon was ready to answer their questions; had expected them. The bond not only affected the Jedi's Warrior, but also the master of the newly discovered Chosen One. For a long time the Council had known what Obi-Wan meant to the Order, the implications of Anakin were new.
"Well, what?" Obi-Wan jumped in before Qui-Gon could speak. He turned slightly to find the other Jedi standing next to him; his equal.
"Have you completed the bond?" Poof prodded.
"Which part of 'none of your business' did you have trouble understanding when you asked me earlier?" Obi-Wan's voice was cold and hard and there was no doubt he was furious.
Qui-Gon was amazed. He was known to defy the Council, but Obi-Wan was downright belligerent.
"Obi-Wan," Yoda called. Qui-Gon was further surprised to hear it was not a reprimand for his behaviour. It was a plea for co-operation. It was good to be the Jedi Warrior he decided.
'You may think that now, give it a couple of cycles and I doubt you'll find me deliberately baiting the Council as amusing,' Obi-Wan told him straight to his mind, not ceasing to glare at the Council as he spoke to his bondmate.
'Deliberately?'
"Obi-Wan and I have not discussed it yet ourselves," Qui-Gon said diplomatically.
'Spoil sport.' Obi-Wan told his master, faintly annoyed at Qui-Gon for defusing the situation.
"Discuss it you should, then come speak to us you will."
Obi-Wan opened his mouth to argue, but this time Qui-Gon beat him to it.
"Yes, Master."
"Remember, Obi-Wan, you may be the Jedi Warrior, but in other matters you still answer to us."
Obi-Wan growled at Mundi.
'Careful, Mundi,' Qui-Gon thought to himself. 'Push too hard, try to hold him back in any way and he'll leave us all.' Qui-Gon thought back to when he had first felt the presence back on Tyron and then Naboo; he remembered thinking of it as a shadow. He could not think of a more apt description of what Obi-Wan was. Although he was ablaze with the Light, he was not completely without the Darkness; he is neither and both… a shadow.
'That is always as I have thought of myself,' Obi-Wan said, seeming to be able to have more than one conversation at once.
Obi-Wan bowed to the Council and Qui-Gon followed suit. They turned and left together.
"Of all the insufferable, stuffed up, arrogant…"
"What do you expect if you 'deliberately' bait them?"
"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon." The fight left Obi-Wan as quickly as it had come.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't know," he said truthfully. "I feel shadows all around me and underneath it all I feel an itch as if I should be doing something, but don't know what."
"Come, lets all three of us," Qui-Gon nodded to Anakin who was quietly waiting up the hall. "Go to the training salles. Anakin can watch his new master be beaten into the ground by his predecessor."
"I'd like that."
The three Jedi walked together through the Temple halls and if they noticed the whispers or furtive glances or heard the gossip of the Chosen one, the Sith or Obi-Wan's return from the dead or Qui-Gon's latest resistance to the Council's wishes, they gave no sign.
The Jedi found an empty training room, wanting to escape some of the more obvious stares. Anakin sat quietly, but excitedly on one of the benches that lined the enormous room. The whole Temple was on a scale he had never been able to imagine and even the private training areas boasted vast spaces with high, sawing ceilings so that any Jedi intent on practice and training was not limited by the size of the room.
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood at the room's centre. They had shed their cloaks and ran through a number of warm up exercises, but now they were ready to begin. Qui-Gon studied his opponent, noting the similarities and differences in his stance. He knew that if Obi-Wan fought as the Shadow he could not hope to win and in truth even without his added senses, Obi-Wan was a formidable opponent.
Obi-Wan in turn studied Qui-Gon, happy to be once again indulging in the simple pleasure of sparring with his master. Judging from Qui-Gon's faint smile, Obi-Wan thought that he was not the only one taking pleasure in the anticipation. He gripped the borrowed practice sabre, feeling its weight and balance. He had yet to build a new one to replace the one lost on Naboo, so for now he had to make do with the less powerful training weapon. Answering Qui-Gon's smile with one of his own, Obi-Wan leapt at Qui-Gon, choosing to attack low, instead of using his usual aerial style.
Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan too well and had expected his old apprentice to try and disconcert him by breaking his usual habits and had Qui-Gon been any less of a swordsman, the ploy may have worked. But even if Qui-Gon was not an equal to the Jedi Warrior, he certainly was a worthy adversary.
The battle raged and Anakin watched its fast turns and lightning kicks almost breathlessly. He had only seen the Jedi fight with their 'sabres a couple of times; once on Tatooine and the second time on Naboo in the hanger. However, both times his viewing had been interrupted. Now he watched the magnificent dance and deep in his mind where he kept his fears he pictured himself, lightsabre in hand, fighting against injustice and freeing the galaxy from tyranny.
The duel ended, Obi-Wan neatly knocking Qui-Gon's weapon from his hand, and both Jedi bowed to each other in respect for each other's abilities.
"Wow," Anakin said to them both as they walked over to him to put their cloaks back on. "That was wizard."
"Thank you, Padawan."
"Will I be able to do that one day?" Anakin asked, treasuring the image he had created in his mind.
"In time, my apprentice. In time."