Chapter 6
Obi-Wan woke before dawn's light could touch the horizon. He opened his eyes to see the city beyond the window still cloaked in darkness. He gazed into the night and felt oddly comforted by its presence. He drifted in this feeling for a time, enjoying his moment of peace. He sank further into the darkness of night only to brush against another kind of Darkness. Hidden in the folds of the Force, Obi-Wan once again felt the Darkness that persisted in lingering over the capital. He tried to follow it, but it was as a phantom; immaterial and lacking any substance for him to grab hold of.
It was looking for him now though, searching for the source of the change in the currents of the Force.
"Good," he whispered to it. "Know that I am here."
"Obi-Wan?"
The young Jedi turned his head to see Qui-Gon lying on his side, head propped up on one arm, gazing at him through the darkness as he had been gazing out over the cityscape.
"I'm sorry, Qui-Gon, I did not mean to wake you."
"It was not your words that woke me, but your silence here," he tapped his temple. "You disappeared Obi-Wan, retreated from the bond."
"I was distracted by something."
"I understand that you must shield yourself from me at times, my Shadow, but not tonight."
"I'm sorry," Obi-Wan repeated his apology.
"Sh, my love." Qui-Gon leant forward and kissed his soul mate gently. "It matters not now."
Obi-Wan surrendered to the kiss, burying his hands in his lover's thick mane of silver hair, pulling him closer until the larger man lay atop him.
"Qui-Gon, love me please." There was a desperation in his voice and for an instant Qui-Gon felt it too, knowing that their time together was fast running out.
The Jedi Master trailed his fingers over the hard muscle beneath him, his feather light touch causing a groan to escape Obi-Wan's lips. His mouth followed their path, sucking and biting gently as he moved down Obi-Wan's body. He took his time, learning the contours of his lover's body, as he had been unable to earlier in their haste. He noted every mark, every mole and every scar, those from Obi-Wan's apprenticeship mixed in with news ones, all with their own unique story. He lavished attention on the velvety smooth skin and delighted to hear the moans and gasps for breath that he managed to entice from his bond mate.
"You're beautiful, my own," he breathed out between kisses. "More so than I ever imagined."
The Jedi master ignored Obi-Wan's straining erection, carrying on his investigation of the young supple body all they way down to his toes.
"Force, Qui-Gon, what you do to me," Qui-Gon heard above him as he retraced his journey back up one leg. This time when he reached Obi-Wan's penis he did not ignore it. His tongue flicked out causing a startled groan from his lover. He gently blew on the moisture left behind by his tongue and smiled wickedly at feeling Obi-Wan tremble beneath him. He moved forward and this time took Obi-Wan's length into his mouth.
The Jedi savoured the feeling of tasting his lover for the first time, drawing out the moment as long as he was able. He stroked Obi-Wan's thigh with one hand while the other inched beneath the gently writhing man to stroke lightly over his entrance.
"Oh, stars."
There was no doubt about Obi-Wan's tenuous control, he was fast descending towards orgasm, but Qui-Gon was not done with him yet. He once more kissed his way up Obi-Wan chest, forestalling any word of protest from his lover by carefully inserting his finger into Obi-Wan's anus. The loud, desire filled moan that this enticed was almost enough to send Qui-Gon into his own oblivion, however he was not a Master for nothing.
"Obi-Wan," he gasped, allowing that to slip past his control. "Tell me what you want, my love."
"Damn it, Qui-Gon, you know what I want." Obi-Wan rose up slightly from the bed, shifting, trying to impale himself further on Qui-Gon's finger. "Please, don't make me beg."
Qui-Gon did not waste time in pointing out to his lover that he was already begging, however he complied with the demand. He reached out for the oil they had used only hours earlier, coating himself with the sweet smelling fragrance. Obi-Wan was still loose from their earlier activity, but the Jedi master had no desire to hurt his young lover and so took his time in preparing Obi-Wan. Finally, for it seemed a lifetime to the knight, Qui-Gon was happy with his preparations and positioned himself at Obi-Wan's entrance.
"Are you ready, love?"
"More than, please… please…please." Obi-Wan's words dissolved into a mindless stream of nonsense as he at long last got his desire. Qui-Gon pushed into him and both men could not help but gasp and moan with their joining. They moved together, already in perfect sync with each other, body to body, mind to mind and heart to heart. They came together for the second time that night, releasing themselves to the bond that lay between them, binding them.
"It's an insult and disrespectful," insisted Mundi. "They were obliged to inform us if they intended to bond."
Morning had come to the Temple and with it so did politics and duty. The Council met, all knowing the events of the previous evening.
It was Yoda's soft chuckle that drifted over Mundi's angry words and not murmurs of agreement.
"Knew we all did what they intended, blind not to see we would have been."
"Still…" Mundi tried again, not mollified at Yoda's soft rebuke.
"Peace, Councillor," Mace interrupted, not wanting to have another debate on the impetuous nature of a certain Jedi Warrior. The Force had chosen and no argument was going to change who their Shadow was. "They deserve this time to be together without the scrutiny of the Temple bearing down upon them. Both of them have always followed the Force and I trust them both to 'inform' the Council in due time. The Force separated them for five years, and when the Shadow leaves again it could be for another five years. Will you begrudge them this time granted to them?"
Mundi shook his head, silenced finally by compassion for lovers kept apart for too long.
"Difficult road lies ahead of them I see, wise it would be to let them walk it unhurried." Yoda nodded to himself as he saw something only he could see. "Time, time is a treacherous thing; betray you it can by passing too quickly and too slowly. Treasure this time, we all should."
Morning found the lovers in blissful contentment even though both knew it could not stay so for long as both had things they must attend to.
"I am teaching philosophy this morning with the first year apprentices," Qui-Gon told Obi-Wan as he dressed for the day.
'Lucky first years,' Obi-Wan thought, although not quietly enough because the other Jedi heard him through the bond
"Does that mean you want to join us?" he inquired, ignoring the sarcasm that had laced Obi-Wan's mind voice.
Obi-Wan gave Qui-Gon a look that the master interpreted to mean he was not being funny.
'Especially considering the hour of the morning.' Was the thought that closely followed from the other side of the bond.
"We are Jedi, Padawan," Qui-Gon reminded his lover, enjoying the argument, the same argument that they had had for years before Obi-Wan had been knighted. "We can not stay in bed all day."
"I bet I could find a way to convince you to stay." Obi-Wan had the look of the Sith in his eye, the one that told the master his old padawan was up to mischief. He decided to pretend he had not seen it and ignore the comment, another characteristic left from Obi-Wan's apprenticeship.
"Anakin has sabre drills with his class as well."
'Spoil sport,' Obi-Wan thought at him as he too dressed, forced to put on his tunics from the previous night.
"I'm going to go back to my quarters for some clean clothes."
"While you are there you could pack your things and move them back here," Qui-Gon suggested casually, pausing to see Obi-Wan's reaction.
"Of course."
It seemed to be a morning of old behaviour, and Qui-Gon should have known that Obi-Wan would surprise him; it was an annoying habit that also remained.
"Is that all?" he asked, slightly incredulous at Obi-Wan's apparent indifference to the sudden change within their lives.
"We said it was temporary for me to live elsewhere."
"Yes." Qui-Gon could not think of anything else to say.
The knight, who had finished dressing, flashed him a wicked grin.
"You should be kind to your old master."
"I am kind to you, Master." Obi-Wan moved to stand by his bondmate, his hand snaked up over the master's broad chest and up behind his neck so that he could pull the taller man down for a sweet, slow, morning kiss. "Things would soon become boring if I did everything you expected."
"True," the older man conceded, holding Obi-Wan to him for a hug.
"And if it makes you feel any better, your habit of being cryptic still frustrates me." Merriment and the tingle of humour flowed over the bond, which met Qui-Gon's own amusement as he remembered the conversation on the ship from Naboo.
"You said you missed my cryptic words."
"I did, doesn't mean that it isn't annoying."
The Jedi master stared at his young love and was once again struck by the joy he felt at having his apprentice returned to him, back in his life and his mind.
"No more than I."
Qui-Gon looked puzzled at Obi-Wan's apparent non-sequencer words.
"No more joyful than I to be back in your life… and mind, Master."
"And you say I'm cryptic," he said and kissed the source of his joy on the mouth. "I am happy to be with you, Obi-Wan."
Before he could speak further, Qui-Gon was interrupted by a query through a different bond, the training bond he shared with Anakin.
"I must go," he said, having no need to explain further, knowing Obi-Wan had felt the padawan's presence through the soulbond.
"I will see you later, beloved."
"I love you, my own, my Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan returned to his temporary quarters to change. He packed up his few belongings and had them moved to his master's quarters by a droid. The Warrior was restless with inaction, he had never been one to remain still long, even as a child, and as an adult and defender of the Jedi he had never been idle. The Darkness lurked, it was true, yet the Force was not calling him to it; it remained out of reach of his questioning sense.
He went to his workbench where his two lightsabres rested. He had only just finished the replacement for the one lost on Naboo. He had tested it the previous evening, but had not tried it while fighting. The other sabre, which sat so innocently next to it, was something entirely different. It was longer, sleeker somehow and emanated a sense of history. It was the sabre of the Warrior Jedi and had been carried by countless Jedi before him. He brushed a finger against the cool casing, seeing brief flashes of battles centres old, fought by all those gone before. With this lightsabre he was linked to all those who had carried the burden before him; it was an honour, but it was also daunting.
Obi-Wan had carried the weapon with him since he had clamed it as his own five years ago, but he had never used it. In all his time alone in the galaxy he had never reached for it and its reassuring memories of battle. He had always used his old 'sabre, and now he had built a new one, still not ready to wear the mantle of his responsibility.
'It's one thing to do your duty, another thing entirely to advertise it to everyone.' Which was the other reason why he had yet to fully claim the sword; other than his own personal hesitation, was the quiet whisperings in the Force that counselled discretion and subterfuge. Returning to Coruscant and finding such an obvious taint to the planet, that the other Jedi seemed totally unaware of, only reinforced his conviction that it was not time to claim his right; corruption was everywhere and at times it seemed unclear who could be trusted.
'Except Qui-Gon, he can be trusted.' He was thankful for the whispered voice in his mind, smiling at the memory of the night before and the new feeling of the completed bond.
Obi-Wan reached out for the new lightsabre, feeling its familiar weight in his hand. He smiled. When he had been a padawan at moments like this, moments of barely constrained energy, there was only one place he would go. He grabbed the second sabre, securing it in the pack he rarely left behind, and his cloak and left the empty rooms heading for the great arena and the training halls. The Shadow grinned at the thought, for he knew exactly what he was going to do with his morning, and in truth it had been far too long.
"You look pretty good for a dead guy."
"Siri," Obi-Wan greeted casually, as though his friend had not thought him dead for the last five years. "You are looking well."
"Don't be like that, Obi-Wan." Siri clearly looked angry. "Tell me what happened."
Obi-Wan looked longingly at the training area and sighed, he could see the he would have to wait for a space to open up anyway, so he may as well spend time with an old friend, once more repeating lies that he had the Council had agreed on.
"I was on a mission for the Council on the rim," he explained, "My ship was attacked and I was captured, injured. I escaped, but was stranded and unable to contact the Temple."
"For five years?"
"More or less."
The two young knights stared at each other for a while, neither willing to concede. Obi-Wan knew he would win, he had the advantage of patience taught to him in his time as predator to those who would threaten the Jedi.
"Fine, keep your secrets."
Obi-Wan could see in the vibrant young woman who stood before him that time had done nothing to temper her passion, nor had knighthood it seemed.
"Not all things are the business of others, Siri, and not all things that happen on missions are the business of other Jedi."
Siri seemed to accept this as an explanation. She seemed not to notice Obi-Wan's gentle rebuke and if she did she did not find anything odd about it.
'Perhaps,' Obi-Wan wondered, 'the other Jedi can sense part of what lies within me and respond to it.'
The conversation turned to other matters, including Qui-Gon's new padawan and Siri's desire to take on one of her own, but Obi-Wan did not find it as easy to relax around the other Jedi as he did around his dear friend Bant. She told Obi-Wan some of what had happened in his absence, and Obi-Wan was willing to listen, even if he was fully aware of the Temple goings on in his absence.
After a time a space opened up on the floor and Obi-Wan gratefully bid Siri good day.
"Don't you want to spar?" she teased. "Afraid you are rusty?"
"Another time, perhaps." He smiled at her in fond affection, remembering all the times they had clashed as children and all the times she had been there for him. Obi-Wan had missed Qui-Gon, as he was part of his heart, but it was Bant and Siri that made the young knight realise how much he had missed the other Jedi and how relieved he was to once more stand among them. As he left her side he said over his shoulder, "Congratulations."
"For what?"
"Your knighthood," he replied and then he was gone, joining in the flow of Jedi training and exercising.
He discarded his cloak and outer tunics in order to move more freely and then began some warm ups. He used the time to adjust his senses to the arena, so full of Jedi, each with their own distinctive aura and each connected to Obi-Wan, buried deep beneath the layers of the Force most Jedi could sense. When he was ready in body as well as mind, he ignited the new lightsabre, blue just like the one before. He flew seamlessly through the first forms until he settled on a kata that best suited his mood.
The Night Kata, a kata of flickering shadows and doubt, was a form learnt only by the most skilled swordsman, not for its difficulty, although its dazzling jumps and flips could put the most confident of padawans off, but because of the lost tale it seemed to tell. It was a kata of sorrow, breathtakingly beautiful and both painful and joyous to watch. Few knew the tale that the kata told, for only long hours of reading in the Temple archives would have revealed the mysterious dance's origins. Obi-Wan knew, and he had not needed to go looking, for he had known the moment he saw it, the moment he performed it, the moment he felt it, what the kata was telling its audience.
The Night Kata was the tale of the Shadow Jedi, protectors and warriors, assassins and killers, who it seemed, were all doomed to die as they live; in fierce combat, fighting for those they guarded.
Obi-Wan disappeared into the Force and immersed himself in the feeling of battle he could always sense. He lost his identity to it, becoming a weapon from within. He took some comfort that at least here he could be seen, that he could perform the dance of the dead Warriors for those who never saw them, only ever sensing their quiet passing as they delivered them from death.
The Jedi that were closest to Obi-Wan stopped their own exercises to watch the magnificent display. Masters stopped their apprentices to watch, drawing their attention to the detail with which the form was performed. The other Jedi watched and saw one of their own at one with the Force. They all smiled to see such a display, despite the innate sadness of the performance. They all smiled, except one.
Anakin watched with his class; he saw the sadness and grief in the lines of Obi-Wan's body as he told the silent story of the Night, but he was not awed by what he saw. Once more he was gripped by fear, terror even, of the man who was bonded so intimately with his master. Most of the time he could forget what Obi-Wan was but other times, like now, he saw all too clearly the danger that lay at the heart of the Jedi's Shadow.
The Kata came to an end and Obi-Wan stopped. He was staring straight at Anakin. The young apprentice felt the gaze sweep though him, seeing what he could not fathom. Then the intense regard was gone and Obi-Wan left the training area without looking back.
We must tell the Council tomorrow, Obi-Wan."
"Hmmm," was the only response Qui-Gon received. He looked at his bondmate and saw worry lines around his eyes and a deep frown upon his brow.
"Obi-Wan?"
"Sorry, Qui-Gon, I was light years away."
"We must inform the Council of the bond, Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon repeated himself, choosing not to call Obi-Wan on his distraction just yet, fearing that it was the need of another that drew his lover away from him.
"Yes, of course." Qui-Gon joined Obi-Wan on the large double bed, relishing the ease with which Obi-Wan reoccupied his life. 'Although they'd have to be blind and stupid not to already see it.'
Obi-Wan smirked.
The master caught the fleeting thought that flitted across Obi-Wan's mind.
"They are not stupid, Obi-Wan, they are the wisest of our order," he reminded the young man as he lay down in the bed. Obi-Wan sat up at his side. "Even if they do not always appear so."
That caused Obi-Wan to snort in amusement; he was not the only Jedi to have clashed with the Council and was all too familiar with Qui-Gon's history with the Council. The man had made a career of going against their collective wishes.
"All the same though," Qui-Gon continued. "We must tell them, it is only right."
"I wasn't arguing, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan pointed out, as he snuggled down into the bed and Qui-Gon's warmth. "I just like messing with their minds."
"Why?" Qui-Gon's hand made lazy circles on Obi-Wan's back as he held the smaller man in his arms.
"Something to do?" Obi-Wan stretched into Qui-Gon's touch. "I think they need someone to make sure they do not become too dissociated from the Jedi in the field. I argue with them for that reason, just as you argue with them for the sake of the Force over their concern with politics."
Both were silent for a time, enjoying their time together.
"That feels nice."
"What, this?" Qui-Gon repeated the caress to Obi-Wan's back and chuckled at the semi-purr he received.
"Is it time for bed now, Master?"
"Soon, but I had plans for you first." So saying, he leant forward to kiss Obi-Wan, only to be met halfway by his very willing bed mate.
After night had long since crept upon them, Qui-Gon lay sleeping in a deep dreamless sleep, however Obi-Wan once again lay awake, staring at the night-time city. His thoughts dwelled on what he had felt at the end of his training session. He had thought of nothing else since; it was what he had been thinking about when Qui-Gon had brought up the bond and the Council, until Qui-Gon had managed to distract him with a few hours of tender love making.
The boy felt fear, that much was obvious, however he had seemed to be terrified of Obi-Wan, terrified beyond all logic or reason. Why then did he stir up such fear in the child?
'Why?'
'Because you are dangerous,' the part of him that was nothing but shadow whispered in his mind. 'The boy is right to fear you, you are vengeance and justice concealed in death.'
' He can see what you are.' The last was almost a taunt.
Obi-Wan did not sleep that night, not a moment did his mind rest, unconvinced that the shadow voice was wholly correct.