(A/N: Yo! 'nother chappie up! Kikyo got eaten! Kikyo got eaten! Ha ha ha ha ha-ha! I've always wanted to do that! Read on to see what other madness my mind came up with at 12:56 at night!)
"So…what's his deal?" Kagura asked, looking at Bankotsu who was currently in a sparkly, blue tube top and poofy fairy-princess skirt, with fake-o angel wings strapped to his back as he made conversation with a tree. "Who? Banpyon? He's high on Benadryl and rum!" Ayane smiled. "What and what now?" Kagura queried. "Well ya see, it appears that lil' Banny has an ickle allergy to kitties, so we gave him some Benadryl to make it better, which it did, but it also made'm loopy." "But not enough for our tastes!" Ayaki snickered, "So Ayakkun's been giving him rum with each dose and this is the result." "AUGH! AUGH! GEDDOFFA ME EVIL RADISH! GEDDAWAY!" Bankotsu shrieked, running around in circles and slamming into a wall. "I see…" Kagura said, "Whaddabout him?" she asked, pointing to the psychiatrist/dog walking around on all fours in a dog costume. "He wanted to know what I did to Renrin." Ayane said, taking on a look of absolute calm that was reminiscent of Kanna; she turned her gaze on Kagura, who noticed her eyes had an insane light to them, "Do you…want to know…what I did to him?" she asked, a huge, unnatural grin filling her face. Kagura got seriously freaked, "Nuh-no! No! I-I'm fine! Thanks!" Psychiatrist/dog jumped up on the sofa and Ayane started beating him over the head with a remote, "BAD DOG! BAD DOG! BAD DOG!" Psychiatrist/dog yelped and ran out of the room, "Yea! You better run!" Ayane yelled, "Next time, I'm feeding you ta Captain Happy!" Kagura watched this with amusement, remembering fondly how the lamb had dispatched the claypot, Kikyo.
Shaking her head to clear it, she pointed to Jakotsu, "What's his damage?" Jakotsu was currently eatinga shoe and smashing his feet into guavas, saying, "Yes, the service has been superb so far. I never knew what purple sounded like before! It's fantastic! And I never knew sweet sounded like that! Cool! "Oh…Jakotan? He musta gotten into my stash." Ayane shrugged. "You don't mean…" Kagura started. "Hey, I try everything once." Ayane smirked, "From the looks of it, He got into my Shrooms and Acid." "AUGH! AUGH! GEDDAWAY BRITNEY SPEARS! AUGH! AUGH! GEDDAWAY YOU WHORE! GEDDAWAY! GEDDAWAY!" Jakotsu screamed thrashing about wildly, causing a huge vase to fly of a high shelf and onto his head, knocking him out cold. Ayane handed Kagura and Kanna sticks and walked over to Jakotsu's body. The three started poking him and Kagura noticed Renkotsu, rocking back and forth, whimpering, "What's wrong with him?" she asked. Smirking, Ayane dropped her stick and went for something under the sofa. After pulling out the Playskool Popcorn Popper, she carried it behind Renkotsu and then ran with it.
POPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPPOPOPOPOPOPOPPPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOPOP!
"YYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! STAYAWAY, ENMADAIOH!" he howled, "IT'SNOTMYTIME! TAKEGINKOTSU! HEONLYSAYSONEWORDFORTHELOVEOFGOD! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" he ran shrieking from the room as Kagura, Ayane and Ayaki rolled on the floor with laughter and Kanna's smile grew bigger and lasted a bit longer this time. "Truh-traumatized?" Kagura gasped. "Traumatized." Ayane replied. "Whaddabout him? What's his deal?" Kagura asked, pointing to Suikotsu, who was rolling around in a pile of ice cream, getting more of it on him than in his mouth. "I turned him into an ice cream addict!" Ayane grinned, "Gwon! I dare ya ta take a spoonful! It'll be the last thing you'll ever do!" A fly flitted over head and landed on the ice cream; there was a flash of steel and Suikotsu's claws sliced the unfortunate creature to bits, causing a small Chunky Monkey Tsunami. Suikotsu then sighed contentedly and snuggled down in his ice cream nest, saying happily, "Mine…mine…mine…"
Ginkotsu rumbled by, gave Kagura and Kanna flower wreaths, made happy horseshoes with his eyes and continued on his way, scattering flower petals in his wake.
In the well house, there were several loud thumps, crashes and screams and Naraku dashed out, tape worms and leeches flying off him, covered in feathers, a rubber glove on his head, looking like an overgrown chicken. Bankotsu took notice and cried, "HAVE AT THEE, FOWL OF EVIL! I KNOW OF YOUR INSIDIOUS COLLABORATION WITH THE VILE TELETUBBIES AND THE ONE KNOWN AS…" he paused, looking like he might throw up, "BARNEY!" "Who is this…Barney? Teletubbies? Bankotsu, come to your senses!" Naraku snapped, looking a little afraid. "EN' GUARDE!" Bankotsu shouted, rushing Naraku with a carrot. Naraku, knowing how strong Bankotsu was, screamed and ran the other way.
Later, while everyone was eating dinner, Kikyo came in. "Eww…you smell stinky!" Ayato cried, pinching his nose, "You need a bath!" He grabbed her wrist with a dish towel and dragged her along to the bathroom, "Buh-bath? NO! I can-I mean, I don't need a bath!" Kikyo cried, struggling frantically to get free. "You're not kiddin' anyone, Queen Cow-crud!" Ayato cried, turning on the bath water, "In!" "NO!" "NOW!" "NO!" "Not an option!" Ayato said brightly, heaving her into the water. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH! I'M MELTING! MELLLLLLTING!" Kikyo shrieked as she disintegrated. Ayato ignored her and poured soap into the clay filled water, humming to himself. He used her clothing as a strainer to keep her from going down the drain (not yet! She'll die later!) and said down to the lumpy mass that was the almighty miko, "When ya dry out and pull yourself together, come out and join us for dessert, kay?"
(A/N: ((spinning in office chair, gets dizzy, falls off, hits head)) Owwie...woo...lookie at the room spin! Sowwy it was so short but your authoress was dizzy! Don't forget to send in your suggestions for torture methods! I know what I'm doin' to Kanna next chappie but the others, I'm open to ideas! R&R PEEPS! I'm outtie yo!)