They walked into the squad room side by side, but they couldn't have been farther apart if they'd tried. He'd held the door for her, just like he always tried to do, but not a word was spoken. She'd expected awkwardness between them, but this surprised her. Perhaps she had made the mistake of thinking their friendship was stronger than it really was.

The room went silent when they appeared. Olivia made eye-contact with her, Stabler, Sledge and Munch eyed Bobby like he was still something of a suspect, and the rest stared at their shoes. It didn't take a detective to know what they were thinking.

"You got something you want to say?" she asked quietly, her gaze flicking to each one as they looked to see who she talking to. "Questions? Comments?" Nobody spoke. "No? Then I'm going to go get changed and then we're going to get back to work, if that's okay with everybody." There was that hard-ass again, but right then, she was grateful. Murmurs of assent drifted through the room as they turned back to their computers, their paperwork, their discussions - or at least pretended to. She could ignore the covert glances in her direction as she made her way toward the restroom, but the waves of pity that washed over her were harder to deal with. She wanted to turn and ask them, What has happened that I deserve pity? I'm not cursed, I'm not fighting for my life, I'm not the victim here, so what the hell are you pitying me for?

Once she reached the restroom, she closed the door behind her, leaned against it, and cried.

The room was quiet when Alex emerged, but it wasn't the heavy silence that she'd left. Munch, Olivia and Stabler were conversing quietly, with Sledge and Fin sharing a stack of file folders at a nearby desk. Cragen was in his office again and Dr. Huang sat against the wall behind Sledge, unobtrusively observing the other side of the room, where Bobby was working all alone on her laptop.

She hadn't expected them to welcome him with open arms, but the severity of his exclusion surprised her. Did anyone even try to talk to him? She glanced at Dr. Huang, who had turned his attention to her now. He nodded at her, then picked up a white Styrofoam cup and disappeared down the hall. Alex stared after him, then draped her coat over the back of an empty chair and made her way over to Olivia.

"Please tell me you have coffee brewing somewhere," she said, trying to smother what started out as a fake yawn. Munch chuckled.

"What, Major Case never pulls all-nighters?" he asked.

"Not without coffee," she replied with a smile. "Now, don't make me ask again."

"Down the hall," Olivia said, "past the Captain's office, third door on the left."

Alex thought nothing of their friendly banter until she turned and caught Bobby watching her. Their eyes met for just a moment, then he went back to staring at her computer screen.

He had friends; she'd even met a few, and women seemed to love his little quirks and shy smiles. He got along fine with the other detectives at Major Case, except for Sledge and maybe one or two others, those that thought his methods a little too much like assault and battery of the mind. No, he didn't go out with the guys for beer and a ball game, and she couldn't remember if she'd ever seen him shooting the breeze around the coffee maker; he just wasn't that type of guy. He was too ... much, for most people.

She cast a backwards glance as she headed down the hall, but he was lost in his research again, only the small frown on his face marking this as a day unlike any other. He usually reveled in research.

The bitter scent of brewing coffee teased her nostrils as she entered the break room. Dr. Huang was seated at a small round table, waiting for her. Neither spoke as she poured herself a steaming cup and took a seat across from him.

"He isolated himself, didn't he?" she asked quietly.

"As soon as you left the room," he said. The doctor was very casual about it, but she could tell she was being evaluated, carefully checked over for any cracks or breaks. She took a drink of her coffee. He could search all he wanted; she was fine.

"Will he be all right?" Leaning back in his chair, Dr. Huang gazed off toward the ceiling as he considered.

"I don't know," he said at last. "I've seen hundreds of victims of sex crimes, but nothing like this." He shook his head. "Detective Goren is a very ... unusual man. How he deals with what has happened, I wouldn't be comfortable even offering a guess, but - " He paused and sipped his coffee. " - I can say with some degree of confidence, that right now, he's suffering terribly."

"And they actually pay you to state the obvious?" Alex said blandly. He gave her a small smile and took a deep breath.

"You and Detective Goren are close; more than partners, more than ... friends, - " He was watching her closely and she tried to keep her face perfectly neutral, with just a hint of annoyance in her eyes. " - but not lovers. Do you think he ever considered taking your relationship to that level?"

"I don't know," she said with a slight frown. Bobby wasn't exactly an open book, not one written in any language she could read, anyway. Sometimes, she'd glimpse passages, phrases, seemingly random letters that could mean anything ... or nothing. Dr. Huang cleared his throat.

"He needs someone to understand him, support him, anchor him, and affirm him. That's what you do, and if he thinks that he's lost that, lost you, it's going to make it very difficult to heal." He lifted his cup to his lips, then lowered it without drinking. "You were the last person he wanted to see in that cell." Alex nodded mutely. She glanced up as Munch stuck his head into the break room.

"Knock knock," he said, his acerbic voice dry with some secret joke. "I'm not interrupting anything, I hope."

"Just talking," Alex said with a shrug. Munch peered at her over the tops of his glasses.

"Well, watch out. The dear doctor can't seem to keep his hands out of your head."

"It's not just something you turn off, Detective," Dr. Huang said with a laugh. Munch crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the doorjamb.

"That's why you're so much fun at parties." He turned his attention back to her. "How much longer do you think you're going to need, 'cause your partner's already acting ... I don't know if incensed is the right word, but he's not acting normal." Alex raised one eyebrow. "He's talking to himself - " Munch elaborated, " - loudly, and gesturing. And pacing. Olivia's afraid he might hurt himself." She shook her head and stood up.

"That's just what he does. It's when he gets quiet that you have to worry." She grabbed her cup and headed back to the coffee machine.

"That's not decaf, you know."

"Thank God for small favors," she said with a laugh. She warmed up hers and then poured a second cup.

"You think that's a good idea?" Munch asked when she turned around, a cup of coffee in each hand. "I would think giving Detective Goren caffeine would be like throwing gasoline on a fire."

"Not tonight," she said. She glanced at Dr. Huang, who nodded slightly. "Are you going to join us, Doctor?"

"Well, somebody has to maintain an impartial opinion," he said with a smile as he stood up and pushed his chair in. Munch walked beside her as she made her way down the hall, Dr. Huang following a short distance behind them.

"You know," Munch said quietly, "I didn't specifically mean you when I suggested - "

"Who, then?" Alex interrupted. "Olivia? I'm sorry, I know she's your friend and you know her better than me, but I don't think she could have handled it. I'm barely handling it."

"It was that bad?"

"Not that it's any of your business," she said with a crooked grin, "but no. Being helpless, completely at the mercy of the incubus was horrible, but ..." She remembered that moment, that brief second where he'd held her so close, as close as two people could be. He had felt so good. "... no, the rest of it wasn't that bad." She paused as the sound of his voice drifted down the hall to them. "The worst part," she confessed, "is thinking I might lose him because of it." Munch nudged her with his elbow.

"He'd be a fool to give you up."

Disclaimer - Law and Order: CI and SVU, and the characters protrayed therin, are the property of Dick Wolf and Assoc., but Detective Sledge is all mine, Mwa ha ha ha! Er, ahem ... please don't sue.