FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE: A NATURAL BORN WORLD SHAKER
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Sheppard sat up straight in the saddle, ignoring the pain in his back and the throbbing in his skull as they entered the main part of the city. He felt Elizabeth lift her head off his back when he shifted, telling him she was alert again. The meeners were moving much more slowly now, making their way with an almost stately gait up the cobblestone streets back to the Citadel.
The citizenry had all come out to watch the procession, and children ran ahead of them, calling out to whomever would listen that "They've got 'em! They got the escaped criminals!"
A smile formed on his face, and he waved gaily at the curious people. They looked back, a little puzzled.
"What are you doing?" Elizabeth hissed in his ear. "Are you nuts? These people are here to see us hang!"
"Then we may as well give them a show," Sheppard replied, his smirk widening on his face. "Because I'm not about to give them the satisfaction of seeing us beat." He glanced at her over his shoulder, "Are you?"
Elizabeth looked down for a moment, considering this, and, slowly, a mischievous smile grew on her face. When she looked up again, something sparkled inside her eyes. "No," she agreed, the strength returning to her voice, making her sound more like the Doctor Weir he knew. "Not by a long shot."
Brushing back some of the hair on her face and straightening it a little, she started waving as well with her good arm.
The guards bringing them in glanced at each other, surprised by the actions of the prisoners, but did nothing to stop them.
Some of the people actually began to smile back, and a few even waved.
"Have fun at the hanging!" one smart-ass yelled.
"Thank you!" Sheppard yelled back. "Care to join us? It promises to be a real neck-stretcher!"
Elizabeth's eyes widened, but she didn't stop her waving, especially when the crowd around them gave a few half hearted chuckles. It was oddly neat.
"Neck-stretcher?" a different man yelled, brow furrowed. "You're kidding, right?"
"I never kid about necks," Sheppard said solemnly, "or stretching. Or about stretching before you neck, because you never know where it's going to lead!" He grinned wickedly, and the men in the crowd guffawed while a few of the woman gave mock gasps of horror. Elilzabeth just gave Sheppard an incredulous look.
"You mean, you want to be hanged?" the woman next to the yeller called, crossing her arms as she walked to keep up with them, as most were.
"No," Sheppard replied, "Wanna take my place? You know, I know the Governor--I bet he could get you in!"
More of the people laughed, and soon they had a solid complement of people following them up the cobblestone broadway, a large number of them smiling.
"Why'd you try to escape!" someone else yelled.
"Because we were trying to get away!" Elizabeth answered back, getting into the game. In front of her on the meener, Sheppard grinned.
"Yeah, but where did you think you were going?" another person yelled.
"Somewhere other than here!" Sheppard replied. The crowd was laughing heartily now.
"Did you really think you'd get away with it?" a woman shouted snippily, crossing her arms. A massive, oversized blue bonnet on her head bobbed when she stuck her nose in the air.
"Did you really think you could get away with that hat?" Elizabeth challenged back.
The crowd burst into laughter, and several people tried to steal the woman's hat. She squealed and ducked inside a nearby house. The guards looked at each other uncomfortably, not sure if they should put a stop to this or not. The crowd filled the street from edge to edge now, some climbing over steps and through flowerbeds to keep up
"Will you try again?" someone called, a sly look on their face.
"Do meeners smell?" Sheppard yelled back. The crowd loved that, and they tried to get closer. The guards started having to pay more attention to keep them back.
"I bet you smell great," a woman called huskily from a balcony, leaning suggestively over the metal railing.
"You're not sitting behind him," Elizabeth called back, rolling her eyes. "Believe me. It's not pretty."
The woman laughed, joining in the mirth of the people below, and the crowd got even closer. The guards started trying to hurry their progress up, especially as more people were arriving on the street ahead of them, coming to see what the fuss was.
"How you gonna do it?" a man yelled. "If you try to escape, how you gonna do it?"
"He can't," a different person answered. "They ain't got nothing! Look at 'em. How they gonna escape?"
Sheppard grinned at the two arguing men. "Nothing?" he said back. "I've seen folks win many a game of skill with nothing," he said airily. "'Cause sometimes nothing can be a real cool hand."
That got some "oohs" as people appreciated the self-confidence of the statement.
Elizabeth leaned closer to his ear, "Did you just quote Cool Hand Luke?"
"I'm feeling kinda Paul Newmany right now, yeah," Sheppard replied over his shoulder. Then he waggled his eyebrows. "And I guess that makes you Dragline." He felt Elizabeth's soft chuckle at the ridiculous comparison of her to big George Kennedy. Around them, people were practically cheering for them now.
They came around a corner, and found themselves being greeted by another passel of guardsmen. Sitting in the middle of them was Teyla, Travis and...a groggy looking Ronon. The big man was half slumped over his saddle, as if he'd only just woken up and was trying to remember how he got there. He was the only one actually tied to his saddle as well. Teyla arched her eyebrow at Sheppard and Elizabeth and their following, then gave one of her trademark knowing smiles.
"Colonel!" she called genteelly in greeting. "Doctor Weir."
"Teyla!" he called back. "Good to see you." He then gave Travis a quick two fingered salute. "I'm even glad to see you, Travis. How's things?"
The young doctor lifted his eyebrows "Seriously?" he asked. "Not good. I think they're planning on hanging us."
"Yeah," Sheppard agreed, "I got that impression too. I might be jumping to conclusions though."
"You should really stop doing that," Elizabeth chastised the colonel, a smile on her face. "It just gets us all into trouble."
"Ah, but he is very good at it," Teyla noted.
"A natural born world-shaker," Elizabeth quoted, her eyes narrowing a little. Sheppard glanced at her over his shoulder again, eyebrow arch in full regalia.
The crowd continued to laugh at their antics, ignoring the guards as they tried harder to push them back. The two contingents joined together, attempting to continue moving their captives up to the Citadel together, despite the now very solid human traffic jam formed around them.
Teyla glanced around at the audience, then back at the colonel, raising her eyebrows. Sheppard just grinned back. She inclined her head at him, impressed.
And they continued their now inching progress up to the Citadel, and to the gallows they could see set up on the roof of the top floor.
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TBC...for those who are curious, "a natural born world shaker" is also from Cool Hand Luke.