Disclaimer: To add to the long list of things owned/not owned, I do own Hans, Anja, Jeramy, and any of the four other children Hans and Anja have had. Everything else is the same.

Author's Note: I speak no German. Sara is the one who translated everything Hans said into German, because she's proud of her heritage. I speak English and limited Italian and even very little Elvish, but nothing as fluently as her German. I feel bad about that, really. sighs I'm sure I'll get over it.

Chapter Fifteen

Germany is for Large Families

ON THE PLANE

"Sara, you can't speak German."

To prove Kurama wrong, Sara began singing in German.

Mary hotle ein kleines Lamm

Kleines Lamm

Kleines Lamm

Marry hotle ein kleines Lamm

Sein vlies war weib als Sohnee

Four or five other peole joined in singing. The rest of passengers cheered.

"Wow."

"Impressive."

Sara smiled. "Danke." She looked at Kurama. "Any more questions?"

"No."

Faythe groaned. "How do you say 'peanuts' in German?"

Sara looked at her. "Why?"

"I'm starved!"

Sara rolled her eyes. She called for the flight attendant and asked for a bag of peanuts. The flight attendant quickly returned with a bag of pretzels, saying that they were out of peanuts.

Faythe didn't care. She tore into the bag, mumbling "Danke" with a mouth full of food.

The others watched her with morbid fascination. "Jesus Christ."

Faythe swallowed. "Delicious!"

Sara grimaced and turned to Hiei. "I'll be right back." She ran to the back of the plane.

Faythe looked at Hiei. "What's the matter with her?"

"She isn't feeling well."

Faythe thought for a moment. "Is she-"

Hiei glared at her. "She isn't feeling well."

Faythe's eyes got wide. "Ohhhh…" She tapped the side of her nose. "I get it."

Hiei started to say something, thought better of it, and turned forward in his seat to watch the in-flight movie.

Faythe tried to get him to talk again, but to no avail. He was zoned out. "Now who's going to talk to me?" she muttered. Her face brightened. "Hey! I know! Aragorn! Aragorn, guess what?"

Aragorn moved a headphone speaker off one of his ears. "What?"

"Sara's ill!"

"She's 'ill'? What do you mean she's 'ill'?"

"I mean," Faythe said, humming "Rock-A-Bye Baby," "she's ill."
Aragorn shrugged. "Whatever." He thought about what "ill" might mean. A thought came to him. "Faythe," he whispered, "is she…pregnant?"

"Yep! Isn't it cool? Our kids will be mere months apart! And they'll be best friends, just like me and Sara are!" Faythe sighed and sat back in her seat. "Yeah…this is gonna be so cool."

Sara came back and sat down. She looked at Faythe and Aragorn, who were staring at her, and blinked. She turned to Hiei. "Why are they looking at me like that?"

Hiei glared at them. "Stop staring at her." They continued to stare. Hiei shrugged. "Ignore them. They'll stop."

Sara tried hard to ignore them. Finally, she glared at them. "Stop staring at me! Don't you have anything better to do?" The other people began to stare at her. Sara screamed in frustration and slumped down in her seat. "Fine. Go ahead and stare. It isn't strange or anything. Freaks!"

Faythe looked hurt at being called a freak, but continued to stare anyways.

Sara tried to ignore her, humming loudly and tapping her fingers on the armrest.

The guy next to her looked over and whispered, "You're on my side of the armrest. We're not going to have problems, are we?"

"Me? Cause problems? Never."

The guys leaned back in his seat. "Good." Just to be rude, Sara poked him on the arm. When he turned to her, she smiled at him and laid her head on Hiei's shoulder. Hiei rubber her head and she sighed.

Kurama turned in his seat and smiled at them. "She's like a dog," Faythe said, laughing.

Sara was suddenly glaring at her, her eyes purple. "I am not a dog!" Hiei scratched her behind the ear. Instantly, she calmed down. She lay back in her chair and tapped her foot absentmindedly.

Hiei smirked. "Such a cute puppy." Sara didn't protest-the ear scratching had put her in a semi-trance.

Faythe sighed and laid her head on Aragorn's shoulder. He smiled and put his arm around her. His CD player started playing "Moondance," the good Van Morrison version, and he began singing along loudly.

"Can I just have one more moondance with you, my love?

Can I just make some more romance with you, my love?"

Faythe sat up. "Why are you singing that in the wrong key?"

Aragorn stopped singing and looked at her. "I was?"

"Mm-hm. That key change in there doesn't happen until measure 113. You were only at 47," Faythe informed him.

"You memorized the measure numbers?" Aragorn asked, a note of awe in his voice.

Faythe crossed her arms over her chest. "Why? Is that weird to you or something?"

"No! I'm just saying, not a lot of people do that," Aragorn explained.

"Oh, now you want me to conform to your views! Well, guess what, mister? I'm an individual! I have my own tastes, my own views, and my own way of doing things! And if you don't like it, tough shit!" Faythe shouted. She stood up and yelled for dramatic effect. "And I don't deserve your criticism!"

A few women on the plane cheered and clapped. One shouted in broken English, "You go, Liebchen!"

A voice came over the loudspeaker. She said something in German and Faythe looked at Sara. "What did she say?"

"'Thank you for flying on Flight 361 Italy to Germany. Please buckle your seat belts. We will be landing shortly.' Pretty much what they always say."

"Ah." They all buckled up.

AIRPORT

"What do you mean you can't find your luggage?" Sara shouted at Legolas.

"Your luggage, too," Jake reminded her. "The baggage guy said he never saw it."

"How do you know what he said? You don't speak German!" Sara yelled. "Did anybody else leave their luggage in Italy?"

Faythe and Aragorn raised their luggage off of the ground so everybody could see they still had it. "We carried on," Faythe said smugly, grinning.

Sara hit her. "Quit showing off! Everybody else is left with nothing but the clothes on their backs and you want to make us feel worse about our luggage!"

"Sorry," Faythe mumbled.

"You should be." Sara looked around for her German friend. "He should be here by now," she muttered to herself.

"He?"

Sara whirled around. "Yes, Hiei. He. Is that a problem?"
"No. I was expecting a girl"

Sara sat down and began talking to herself. "I shouldn't have to deal with this. Why me? Why is it always me?" She said something in German and then something in a language no one understood. Except Kurama, who clapped his hand over his mouth.

"Who isn't here yet?" Faythe asked.

Sara sighed and looked at Faythe. "My friend isn't here yet. He's supposed to pick us up and show us around town," she explained. "But he's not here, and now we're stranded at the airport."

"With no luggage," Legolas reminded her.

Sara screamed in frustration. "Thank you for reminding me, Legolas! We also have no luggage! Isn't this fun?" She went into hysterics, crying and laughing at the same time. "We have no money, no clothes, nowhere to stay, and nowhere to go! What could be better than this?"

A man with very blonde hair walked up behind Sara and said, "Boo."

Sara jumped a mile into the air, turned around, and smiled. "Hans! I wondered when you'd get here!" She hugged him. "What kept you?"

Hans gestured behind him. "I had to grab your luggage," he said.

Jake stared at him, shell-shocked. "Is-is that why our luggage was gone when I went to look for it?"

Hans nodded.

Sara sighed and hugged him again. "Oh my God! I love you!"

Hiei's eyes widened. "What!"

"Not like that."

Hans smiled and grabbed the luggage. "Let's get you guys to the car." He winked at Sara. "There's some chocolate with your name on it."

"Danke."

They began talking in German. Kurama and Hiei were talking in Japanese, and the others in English. Legolas looked at Faythe and said something in Elvish. Faythe screamed. "Don't do that! I don't want to study!" Everyone stared at her. "What? You don't stare at Sara when she has an outburst!" No one knew how to respond, so they went back to talking.

Legolas said something in Elvish again. "Sè ban perrenon, gli torèth?"

Faythe screamed at him. "I don't want to learn! I don't care if that's part of who I am! I reject you and all the elves I'm unfortunately related to! So get off my back!" She stormed off into the terminal's main counter area.

Hans looked at Sara and asked her something in German. Sara responded in German and Hans laughed.

Aragorn looked at Legolas. "That was uncalled for," he said. "She's had enough problems with her heritage, she doesn't need your help in making them worse."

Hans turned to the group and said something in German. Sara put her hand on his shoulder. "You'll have to excuse him. He's just leaning." She turned to Hans. "English."

He nodded and, in a heavy accent, "What iz thess elf?"

"Huh?" Sara slapped her forehead. "He doesn't know what an elf is."

Legolas smiled. "Well…I'm an elf. And…I'm immortal. And…I do magic."

Hans still looked confused. "Magik? Saw-in-half-girl magik?"

"No, no, no, not that fake stuff. I can make things happen." Legolas looked around her zeroed in on a clock. "Okay, see the clock?" Hans nodded. "Watch what happens to it." The numbers on the dial became letters and the hands spun around wildly. People stopped and babbled about the amazing feat they were witnessing. No one connected the guy with pointy ears, blonde hair, and tunic as the one behind the phenomenon.

Legolas grinned. "See? Magic."

Hans nodded. "Magic. You…all elf?"

They others shook their heads and Hans looked confused. Sara smiled. "I'll explain later. Now, we have to find Faythe."

They caught up to Faythe, who was staring at the signs. "I don't know where to go!" Hans smiled and led them to a bus. He opened the door and loaded in the luggage. "You drive a bus?"

Hans turned to Sara, who translated. "Yes. I drive bus."

"Cool!"

Once again, Sara translated. Hans smiled again. "Danke."

When everyone was on, Faythe turned to Sara. "He smiles too much."

"Oh, leave him alone."

"He does! It's creepy!" Faythe looked at Hans through the mirror in the bus that pointed towards the passengers.

"So he's a happy guy, you'd be, too," Sara said in Hans' defense.

Faythe cocked an eyebrow. "What do you mean, 'you'd be, too'?"

Sara sighed. "In Germany, life is simpler and better. He gets to drive the Audobon, he tests beer for a living, and he's married to a beautiful German woman, who he has five children with."

"Five children! And he's happy? Well, his wife probably isn't! Rearing five children. It's un-American!"

Sara hit Faythe. "Of course it's un-American! He's German!" She sighed. "You don't get it."

"And you do?"

"Duh! I'm German!"

The bus slowed to a stop. "Wir sinhier."

Everyone got off the bus while Hans grabbed their luggage. Just as they were walking to the door, the door flew open and something launched towards them. It hit Sara and sent her sprawling on the ground. "Sara!"

Sara wrapped her arms around the child. "Jeramy!" She tickled him and the kid collapsed into fits of laughter.

Hans picked up the child high over his head and spun him around. "Where's your mother?"

"Inside." Jeramy ran inside and yelled for his mother. A pretty blonde woman carrying a pretty blonde baby stepped outside and smiled at her husband and the guests.

"Hallo zicklein. Bilden sie sich zu hause."

Faythe stared at her. "Huh?"
Sara rolled her eyes. "Danke." She turned to the rest of the group. "This is Anja."

"Hello, Anja."

Anja blinked. "Hallo."

Sara walked up to here and took the baby. "Wurd sie moyen etuas Hife?"

"Kein danke."

"Stop using German!" Everyone turned to Faythe. "I can't speak German! Stop it!"

Legolas scoffed. "You can't speak Elvish, either. They can speak their native tongue, let them speak it!"

"If I don't understand them, they should converse with me in a language I do understand! Is that so wrong? Why wouldn't I want to understand something someone's saying to me!"

Sara looked like she wanted to hit her and translate at the same time. Instead, she shook her head and followed Anja inside the house. Hans followed and Hiei followed Hans, muttering about not letting Hans and Sara in the same room alone.

Aragorn put his hand on Faythe's shoulder. "Sweetie, I sympathize with you. Really, I understand. But you have to not spas so much. People don't like being yelled at so much, you know."

Faythe sighed. "I know. I know."

A little girl came over and looked up at them. Aragorn was about to say something when Hans came out. "Mary Ellen!"

"Papa!" she cried, running to him.

Faythe smiled. "Isn't that cute."

Hans looked at them. "Abendessen. Dinner."

"Good! I'm hungry!"