I originally wrote this as prose about a certain someone... (coughseparationanxietycough) But then I felt like rewriting it into a poem. When I was writing it, I realized it was something that Erik could have written about Christine. This goes against everything any musician has ever been taught about tranferring their emotion into the music, because if you are depressed and the song you're playing is happy, you're afraid to play it because you'll spoil it with your depression so then you get frustrated. I suppose I should say 'I' instead of 'you' because I don't know how it is for the rest of you. So here's the poem, hope you don't come after me with torches and pitchforks...
When the music achieves
That heavenly chord
That melts my heart
I think of you
I think of you
And all your goodness
That warms my soul
And fills my dreams
My dreams of you
Are like fuel to my soul
They keep me going
Keep me thinking of you
And when that chord is played
That melts my heart and warms my soul
And I think of you and your brilliance
I am in agony
Pain so swift and strong
I stagger back in shock
That there can be pain
Among such beautiful song
This pain because I cannot have you
Because of this restraint called my body
Because of my undying love for you
Even as you crush my spirit
Also because of my frustration
That I feel such pain
While the song is so good
Like you
So as the music rises
I fall rapidly down
To my inner selfishness
That I cannot have you
The tears I shed
For these mixed emotions
And longings for you
And this despair
Oh, what I would give
To experience that bliss
Once more and be looked upon
By you with your loving eyes
Those bright and shining eyes
That both love and pity
That give me life and crush my soul
That I adore