Warning: Spoilers for Chapter 10 of "The Shadow over Middleton." Don't read this until you've read that chapter, or unless you don't care about potential spoilers.
Author's Notes: Chapter 10 was probably the hardest chapter to write of all of TSOM to date; there are a couple of key ideas and concepts that needed to be gotten across, but it also contains an awful lot of dialogue, and is ultimately a side note to the main plot thread. And, silly me, when I was plotting out the story, that section was described only as "Ron in cage examined by GJ" - with everything else about it left blank and to be filled in as needed. Oy... I didn't know what I was getting myself into.
When I scrapped the first draft, it was approximately 30 pages, single spaced, in my word processor. The second draft, which I cannibalized and used to provide the flashback sections in the final draft, was at around 32 pages when I realized it wasn't working either - very, very talky. Which is sort of inevitable given the information that needs to be imparted if you're following the events linearly - which is how I write most of my stuff. The final tally was 26 pages, with about 14 of those cannibalized and modified to reflect the different structure (flashback format) to comprise the final one.
These are some of the scenes and such that almost made it into the final version, or earlier versions of scenes that did get included. They are not "official" for the storyline or anything, nor do they really contain spoilers for the story beyond anything that's already in the "official" chapter 10, but considering the amount of time and effort I put into the multiple versions of this chapter, I didn't want them to go entirely to waste. In any case, each is followed by a brief note, either explaining why it was cut, what was different from what it ended up being, or something else about it.
Even though these aren't as polished as the final releases, hopefully you'll enjoy them anyway.
Segment 1: Ron's captivity
First draft: The Cube
Version B - Twos
As they walked, Kim blinked madly while her eyes recovered from the dazzling glare. After a few moments, Kim abruptly realized they were approaching the center of the giant hanger that the hoverjet had entered. And as they neared, the sheer scale of the operation became apparent.
Harsh white light filled the center of the hanger, the radiance coming from more arc lights of the kind that had blinded and disoriented Kim and Ron when they had disembarked from the jet. Diffusers were mounted on most of the lamps, so the light was brilliant and all-illuminating, but not truly blinding - unless you looked directly into the undiffused lamps.
In the center of the hanger, bathed by a full dozen undiffused lights, a huge, transparent half-cube (the height was approximately half the length and width of the structure) was the focus of the activity. No reinforcement could be seen at the seams of the cube, nor could Kim guess the thickness of the walls, but it held an impression of stability, durability, and impenetrability, despite a degree of transparency that made it all but invisible even in the harsh glare of the lights. A metal box rested atop the center of the cube, and a number of pipes, conduits, and wires were tied into the walls at various spots.
The cube structure was flanked on two of the sides by parked GJ hoverjets. The planes' cargo doors were braced open, and a yellow glow from an unknown source inside each bathed the area immediately surrounding the jets in a pool of yellow light, despite the white radiance of the arc lamps.
Wires, cables, and conduits snaked everywhere, leading from inside the aircraft and from what Kim thought must be portable generators to arrays of computers, sensors, lights, speakers, transmitters, receivers, cameras, and a host of other machines of unknown purpose, as well as back forth between the machines. The machines were organized into scattered pockets of activity around the enclosure, each with its own group of attendants and technicians, the pockets in turn forming a ring surrounding the cube, with the parked hoverjets anchoring the circle. An inner ring, near the actual walls of the half-cube, consisting of cameras, sensors, and microphones promised complete coverage of everything that happened inside the enclosure.
Armed GJ agents stood watch from behind the ring of activity around the central structure, and formed the exclusive population of an outer ring beyond the machinery. They carried a variety of weapons including the same shock sticks that the guards outside the hanger had carried, rifles or sidearms of every description from conventional projectile weapons (such as the Walther that rested in Dr. Director's shoulder holster) to more advanced devices that Kim recognized as being lasers, blasters, and stunners. A few even carried things that looked like crystal tipped wands and devices that looked like a fusion of a blaster with a parabolic dish that defied identification as to the exact function or capability.
Although there were a number of guards, the sheer number of scientists working in the area made the armed agents' numbers minuscule by comparison. Some Kim recognized from the Ron Factor fiasco, but the majority were unknown to her - and the sheer quantity of them was mind-boggling. They milled about, some servicing the machines, while others worked at unknown and probably incomprehensible tasks.
The small army of men and women - scientists and guards alike - created a tense and expectant air in the hanger. They watched the central cube with tense, but eager eyes.
"What's going on?" Kim repeated, her feet halting as she tried to make sense of the colossal undertaking. It was frankly astounding the effort and attention to detail that must have been involved in setting up an operation of this scale - and it had all been done in an aircraft hanger at the Middleton airport, not a more permanent facility.
Version A - Threes
Harsh white light filled the center of the hanger, the radiance coming from more arc lights of the kind that had blinded and disoriented Kim and Ron when they had disembarked from the jet. Diffusers were mounted on most of the lamps, so the light was brilliant and all-illuminating, but not truly blinding.
In the center of the hanger, bathed by a full dozen of the undiffused lights, a huge, transparent half-cube (the height was approximately half the length and width of the structure) was the focus of the activity. No reinforcement could be seen at the seams, nor could Kim guess the thickness of the walls, but it held an impression of stability, durability, and impenetrability, despite the transparency that made it all but invisible.
The cube structure was surrounded on three sides by parked GJ hoverjets. The aircrafts' cargo doors were braced open, and a yellow glow from an unknown source inside each bathed the area surrounding the jets in a pool of yellow light, despite the harsh white radiance of the arc lamps.
Wires, cables, and conduits snaked everywhere, leading from inside the aircraft and from what Kim thought must be portable generators to arrays of computers, sensors, lights, speakers, transmitters, receivers, cameras, and a host of other machines of unknown purpose, as well as back forth between them. The machines lay in scattered pockets of activity around the enclosure, the pockets in turn arranged into three distinct rings surrounding the cube.
Each discrete island of activity had its own group of attendants. While pockets within a given ring occasionally exchanged personnel, the rings remained discrete, with movement restricted to moving back and forth within a ring without leaving it.
Notes: A whole lot of effort and labor, and it was just too complicated and cumbersome. The original version is the one with 3 jets, and 3 rings of equipment. Why are they included in reverse order? Frankly the second polishing flows better, so there's more of that version here, with just the major difference included of the real initial draft for comparison.
Another reason it was simplified is that the armament listed might have created the wrong impression. GJ is the bastion of science; the wands and weird gizmos are more along the lines of the experimental weapons in Godzilla movies - a lightning rod (so to speak) and a heat ray, rather than anything to do with magic. So, rather than potentially confuse the issue, it was cut as well.
Based on the complexity of the setting, you can probably get a fair idea of why the first draft went on much too long.
Segment 2: WEE in Turmoil
"The Worldwide Evil Empire has had a very bad day," Dr. Director explained, as she came to a stop beside Kim. "After the destruction of their undersea lair, and thanks to the Navy's rapid interdiction of the area for search and rescue operations, we managed to capture nearly the entire lair's staff, as well as a pair of rescue vessels that had been dispatched by WEE to recover the survivors.
"After following the registration back trail of the captured ships, interviewing the prisoners, and tracing serial numbers from both the recovered escape pods and debris from the destroyed lair, we were then able to trace WEE's funding and procurement process back through a number of very highly placed and almost undetectable facilitators and financiers - upper level personnel in the evil organization, in other words. We also found a number of bank accounts that we were able to get frozen almost immediately.
"This is, quite literally," she explained, "a once in a lifetime opportunity. One that is nearly unprecedented in the annals of law enforcement: taking down a criminal terroristic organization entirely, root and branch alike. If we're lucky," she continued, "WEE will be dealt a death blow. Even if it somehow manages to survive, it will have received a serious setback - and major funding problems - that will impair its ability to operate for years to come."
"That's great," Kim enthused, and meant it. "But what does that have to do with Ron?" she demanded.
"Regardless of my... personal feelings on the subject," Dr. Director explained coldly, "I must concede that Sheldon is rarely completely stupid. Either we have gotten very, very lucky - meaning no criticism of either yourself or anyone else involved in this operation, you understand - or this is... something else entirely.
"Global Justice is frankly overextended at the moment as we take advantage of this opportunity. We're snapping up every part of WEE's organization that we can, as quickly as we can. We have to act quickly before they can go underground - and they will, when the scope of what's happening and what we're accomplishing becomes clear."
Kim glanced around the hanger, and took in the numbers of the personnel, and the array of mechanical devices set up inside the hanger. "If you're overextended, then...?" she began, then gestured vaguely towards the hum of activity, seeking an answer.
"This operation is to prevent the 'something else,'" Dr. Director explained. "Sheldon's motives are personal, and vicious, and he would think nothing of sacrificing nearly everything if it also served to achieve his goals. He cares nothing for his underlings, seeing them as mere tools to use and discard after they've served his purposes."
"So the fact that you're dismantling his empire... is a bad thing?" Kim asked curiously.
"It is if it was sacrificed as a diversion to keep us occupied instead of interfering with his real plan," Dr. Director admitted. "Not that we won't reap some rewards from the operation even if it is only a distraction - which is why we can't and won't ignore the opportunity we've been handed."
"But what plan could he possibly have that would justify... this?" Kim asked incredulously. "Without henchmen, or money, or... or... an organization to control, what kind of a plan could it be?"
Notes: Some of this entered the final draft - in greatly reduced form. Again, it was too much on something that was ultimately irrelevant to the main plot. While the subplot of WEE needed closure, this was a bit too definitive. Not to mention the small matter that if they were this overstretched, the operation in Middleton was just way too big to justify when they could simply "disappear" the putative Ron and stick him in a cage for later while they were dealing with WEE. There was going to be a justification for the size of the operation, but it might have been too big of a hint of a major plot point that will be coming later. Plus, from a purely objective perspective, it just felt a bit too X-Files-ish - and in a cheesy way.
Segment 3: Dr. Director's Threats
When Ron had regained control of his stomach, and had carried Rufus away from the remnants of his illness, the GJ operation limped slowly into action, the planning and anticipation having not foreseen Ron's volatile and dramatic reentry into the chamber. As the scientists regained their composure, Dr. Director walked up to the outer wall of the cube and explained, "Hello, Ronald. I regret the necessity, but as I've already explained to Kim, we need to verify your identity."
Ron still looked pale and sickly as he approached the wall near her. Leaning his forehead against the inner wall of the cube, he whined, "I don't care. I feel awful. I just want to go home."
Dr. Director glanced over her shoulder, and saw that Kim was distracted by a thermal image of Ron that was being displayed on a monitor, and seized the opportunity. "Approximately eight hours ago," she informed Ron, "I had to tell your parents that you were, in all likelihood, dead, and your body was unrecoverable on the bottom of the ocean."
Ron's eyes widened in shock and horror, her words washing everything - even thoughts of his roiling stomach - from his mind. "What?"
"I will not put the Stoppables through the torment of thinking their son has returned, only to face the heartbreak of learning that it was just a synthodrone or a clone pretending to be their son," she relentlessly continued, as Ron's face blanched whiter and whiter. "Cooperate, and it will be a quick, and relatively painless process. Refuse to cooperate, and we will still verify your identity - I owe the Stoppables the chance of Ron's survival, at least - but it will be much more lingering and far from painless."
"My mom must be going crazy," Ron whispered, his eyes tearing up as he pictured the scene. "Dad..." He blinked, but his eyes remained wild as he ran the hand unburdened by Rufus' limp weight through his hair, disordering it further. "Just do what you have to do," he ordered.
"Very good," Dr. Director responded, ignoring the undertones of Ron's agreement. "First, remove the jumpsuit, and place Rufus, your jumpsuit, and the Kimmunicator in the drawer immediately to your right."
Ron blinked, and found the transparent handle that was nearly invisible on the wall. "I'm not wearing anything other than the jumpsuit," he protested.
"I'm aware of that," Dr. Director informed him bluntly.
"Aw, man," Ron looked like he wanted to protest further as he looked around at all the people in the hanger, but the thought of his parents thinking he was dead loomed heavier than his limited modesty. He pulled on the handle, and a hatch opened, revealing a sealed compartment located inside the wall of the cube.
He gently placed the limp body of his naked mole rat inside the compartment, then put the Kimmunicator next to him. As Ron released the handle to reach for the zipper of the jumpsuit, the door to the compartment swung shut. Rufus and the Kimmunicator immediately sank through the wall, dropping out of sight below the level of the floor.
"Rufus!" Ron screamed in protest.
"He's fine," Dr. Director coldly informed him. "Once he's been checked out by a veterinary expert, he'll be released into Kim's custody. Now strip," she ordered.
Ron scowled thunderously, but Dr. Director had too much leverage on him to even argue the matter - his parents, Kim, and now even Rufus. He stripped off the jumpsuit, and without a word, shoved it into the opening. As soon as the door had shut, the jumpsuit too, sank into the floor.
He covered himself with his hands as he stood naked near the wall of the enclosure, the harsh light revealing every line of his body, every bruise and scratch on his skin, and the yellowish stain Rufus had left streaked across his shoulder. "Done," he announced unnecessarily.
"Very good," Dr. Director informed him, unaffected by both his nudity and his obvious disapproval of the process. "You will be given a number of instructions by GJ scientists, and you will obey them all without question."
Ron winced, and as he shifted his feet, his muscles shifted beneath his skin, the edges and the motion brought into stark highlight by the lights. "I understand."
"Good," Dr. Director waved a waiting scientist forward to begin the process as she walked away from the enclosure.
"Now Ronald," the scientist informed him, "there is a shower head located in the ceiling in the far left corner. Please go..." the quiet instructions faded to inaudibility as Dr. Director retreated and Kim stomped along in her wake, her expression a mask of sheer rage.
When she was beyond the ring of scientists, Dr. Director turned and allowed Kim to catch up. "You know why I have to do this," she informed the angry teen.
"Of course I do. That doesn't mean I have to like it. Or agree with it," Kim retorted. "But the way you were talking, you made it sound like I wanted this, too."
"Naturally. And Ronald will be more obedient because of it - whether he is who we think he is, or he isn't."
Kim blinked. "If he's Ron, he'll obey because of me, and if he isn't, he will because Ron would have?"
Dr. Director nodded, and picked up a folder from a nearby console and handed it to Kim. "Here's the arrest report. You'll find it... interesting reading. Now come along. The process is just getting started, but some results should already be available."
Notes: Dr. Director is much more cold-blooded and threatening than her "devil's advocate" role in the final draft, and Ron's family was informed of his probable death - which also didn't make the final cut (they know he was missing, but that's a much less dire - and probably more normal, for them - condition). Kim's anger is also replaced with a wary uncertainty based on GJ's sneaky modus operandi. The original chapter title was going to be "Rage in the cage" but following the 3rd rewrite, and the reduction in hostility, it was no longer suitable, and I chose a more meaningful one to replace it.
You might also note a certain parallelism between some elements of this story and some of the other released chapters in "The Shape of Things Yet to Come." Since I work on unrelated stories in between polishing passes to give myself fresher eyes for editing, there's a certain amount of cross-pollination between stories that inevitably takes place. Which is also one of the reasons why some sentences, turns of phrase, etc. show up in several places.
Segment 4: Analysis Begins
Dr. Director led Kim to the ring of research stations, and while at the first few, the scientists were too distracted and enmeshed in their work to react to their presence, they found some willing and able to answer as they proceeded around the ring.
"Dr. Williams?" Dr. Director asked. "Are you ready?"
At his nod, she explained to Kim, "When Ron was found, he was covered in an unknown and foul smelling substance. Dr. Williams has been analyzing it." Turning back to the scientist, as Kim flipped through the report trying to find the part referring to the substance, she asked, "Your findings?"
"It's organic," he answered, looking away from the eyepieces of his microscope. "Amino acids, proteins, some esters - which are the source of the smell - some long chain molecules - the closest analogue I can think of for those are the excretions of some deep cave fungi. It's what gives the fluid it's... mucilaginous texture."
Kim blinked, "He was covered in snot?"
"A substance with a mucous-like texture," Dr. Williams clarified.
"Is it mucous? Syntho-goo?" Dr. Director asked. "Something similar?"
"It's neither of those. Similar? Well, all three substances are organic, so they do share certain characteristics, and atomic elements in their composition and such, but this appears to be unrelated to either beyond those basic levels. As to what it is? I don't have the foggiest."
"Could it be waste product from a cloning experiment?" Dr. Director asked.
"I doubt it," Williams mused thoughtfully, "there's no genetic material in the sample, and it doesn't conform to any of the components or remainders from any of the cloning procedures I've ever heard of - in either the reputable or disreputable ones."
"Thank you doctor," Dr. Director nodded. "Forward the report to my attention when your analysis is complete, or page me if your findings are radically altered." She led Kim away, steering her with one hand on the teens arm as she tried to read the section describing the material.
Dr. Director led Kim to the next station, where Dr. Michaels was examining the remains of Ron's mission shirt with an illuminated magnifying glass.
Notes: You should have an inkling of the justification for the ring structure now; each node in the rings working on a different piece of evidence or theory, each ring working on a different aspect of the case, and Dr. Director leading Kim around all of them collecting the evidence, and making a determination. It just would have gone on much too long since I wasn't even half way around the first ring when I halted the first draft.
Segment 5: Ron's Explosive Entry
Inside the enclosure, the floor abruptly opened up and Ron rocketed out of the floor, looking distinctly green as he was ejected from the transport system. It looked especially nauseating compared to the orange of his jumpsuit.
"Uh oh," Kim winced, covering her eyes with one hand.
Ron's jumpsuit made his body's arc through the air plainly visible inside the "cube." The spray that erupted in front of him was not orange, but was no less visible as it splattered across one transparent wall of the box. He landed in an ungainly heap at the base of the now noisome wall, heaving and gasping as he struggled to regain his breath while his body struggled at the same time to eject anything and everything else it could find in his empty stomach.
Perhaps even worse than the sight was the sound. Hidden microphones designed to catch every whisper within the cube for ease of interrogation recorded everything, while the banks of speakers that surrounded the GJ operation magnified and broadcast every liquid heave and every panting gasp Ron made for all to hear.
"Prone to motion-sickness," Dr. Director noted as her lips curled in distaste at a particularly gruesome hacking groan. "I'll add a notation to his file."
Even though she had been anticipating the result, and had missed the full glory of the event by averting her eyes, Kim still sounded nauseated as she remarked, "You think?"
A sudden chittering from the speakers reminded Kim that Rufus was in there with Ron, too. Ron made a sound that merged a cough and a laugh at Rufus' comment, and held his roiling stomach with both hands as he tried to quell his nausea. "Good one... But don't make me laugh, Rufus, please," Ron's anguished whisper pleaded.
"What did Rufus say?" Dr. Director asked, "Can you understand him?"
Kim laughed, shaking her head in rueful humor. "Any more I can understand Rufus most of the time - a lot more than I used to. I definitely got this one. He said, 'Smell my stink spray.'"
Dr. Director blinked in confusion, not understanding the reference.
"It's from 'the Fearless Ferret'?" Kim tried to explain. "The wicked White Stripe?"
Curled up in misery on the floor of the enclosure, Ron chuckled through his disgust as he coughed and hacked, trying to get the taste of bile out of his mouth. "Fear not, my furless friend. While we were winded and wounded with wily White Stripe's wicked and woeful weapon, we will..." A renewed bout of heaving brought his oration to a halt
As he knelt, heaving as his empty stomach knotted and roiled, a pink blob erupted from the top of his jumpsuit. Rufus uncoiled, and added his own contribution to the thoroughly befouled wall.
"Lovely," Dr. Director murmured distractedly. She turned to a nearby scientist and instructed, "Pass the word; watch for cross contamination from the naked mole rat."
Notes: This one's probably the closest to the final draft, barring the change in prison setting. It's a tinge more gruesome in a few spots however.
Segment 6: Dr. Smith
"Are you ready, Kimberly?" Dr. Director asked.
"I guess," Kim admitted, rising to her feet and stretching before following her away from her isolated chair.
A hitch momentarily entered Kim's step as she noticed a red- haired woman in a lab coat talking quietly with Ron - the only one still close to him. "Mom?" she wondered briefly.
As the woman glanced over her shoulder though, Kim realized that she didn't know her, and that the resemblance was coincidental. "Or not," Kim's eyes narrowed as she realized the woman's hair color was too uniform to be natural; her appearance had been altered to appear closer to Kim's. "They don't miss a trick, do they?" she scowled in irritation.
"Don't worry," Dr. Director soothed, seeing Kim's steps falter, but misinterpreting the reason. She held one of Kim's arms and guided her towards a conference table somewhat removed from the circle that delimited Ron's freedom - and well away from the woman currently talking to him. "Let the GJ scientists do most of the presentation. However, if you disagree with their conclusions, or can expand on one of the points they bring up, or can clarify an issue, please speak up."
Dr. Smith walked up to the table as Dr. Director was recovering her composure. "Is this a bad time?" she asked as she claimed the last vacant seat.
"Not at all," Dr. Director answered. "We've been eagerly awaiting your report."
Smith pulled the red wig from her head, revealing the short cropped blonde hair beneath. She ran her hands through the scant locks, fluffing them, then sighed. "When I read the psych profile, I didn't believe a word of it. I'm frankly astounded it was completely accurate. But that's neither here nor there."
Notes: Dr. Smith is the psych professional who examines Ron, and she was added starting with the second draft. She's dressed and made up to resemble both Kim and her mother in order to further play on Ron's subconscious trust and willingness to talk; this isn't as explicitly spelled out in the final, but the hints that this is the case are there. She's still in the final draft, but not nearly as much, and this was originally her introduction.
Segment 7: Late Night Monologue
Initial Notes: This doesn't really fit the mood of TSOM (even the lighter parts), so I won't be able to include it in the actual work, so just think of this as a side story. The setting is part of the opening monologue of a late night talk show after news leaks out of Ron's recovery; you can cast it as whichever late night host or show you prefer. Bear in mind, I'm not a comedian, but the celebrity name dropping in the jokes should be right in line with jokes used on any of the network shows; I sort of rattled these off in another window while working on TSOM somewhat late at night as lack of sleep started getting to me.
The late night talk show host smiled across at his band leader, then rose to his tiptoes as he announced, "In other news, there's been a happy ending to the search in the South Pacific; John Stropgable - sidekick to teen heroine Kim Possible - has been found."
He paused for the cheers and applause that greeted the good news, then continued, "True story - I kid you not; he was discovered later that same day passed out on a beach... without any pants." He let that information sink in, raising one hand in a "halt" motion as the audience reacted with a mix of surprise and good humor to the news. He waited another tick, then added, "Sounds more like my honeymoon than crime fighting."
"Ba dum bum," he chortled as a quick rimshot came from the drummer. He grinned over the audience's laughter.
"All kidding aside, we're all very glad for his safe recovery." He paused and clapped a few times, and the audience eagerly joined in. "I'm not sure if you'll have heard this yet - but when he was found, he was arrested for indecent exposure, lewd conduct, and suspicion of public intoxication." He counted off each charge into one hand, then held up a finger as a mixed reaction came from the audience. "Feel free to insert your own joke here about Billy Joel or the Kennedy compound," he instructed to a few titters.
After a beat, he continued. "Any-who, the police didn't recognize him, and he wasn't carrying any ID. Hard to believe from a guy without pants, right?"
After the laughter, he continued, "Now, we managed to get a copy of John's booking photo; Bill, can we see that please?"
Ron's mug shot was displayed on the studio monitors so the studio audience could see it, and it was broadcast to the home viewers as well. In it, Ron was visibly listing to one side, his hair was utterly disheveled, and his eyes were staring vaguely and glassily somewhere over the camera. He was holding a steel-framed black matte card listing his arrest number and "Doe, John #234" in block white letters. A hint of drool was pooling in one corner of his mouth as his jaw hung slackly.
As the titters and hastily muffled laughter rose again, the host raised his hand again, and gently shook one finger. "Now, now, I know what you're thinking. 'Who could ever believe that a guy looking like this wasn't wearing pants when he got arrested?'"
He paused as the laughter continued, then made a segue. "In other news, Michael Jackson held a press conference to announce his pleasure at John's safe rescue." He held up his finger again as some anticipatory groans came from the audience. "Wait for it..." He grinned devilishly as a few chuckles replaced the groans. "He's pleased because John has displaced him from his number 3 spot on the 'Most Embarrassing Celebrity Mug Shot' list."
A split-screen overlay displayed Jackson's Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department mug shot beside Ron's on the monitors. After the laughs faded away, the host continued, "John was, however, unable to displace the reigning champions on the list, Paul 'Pee-wee' Reubens, and Nick Nolte." The two named mug shots replaced the other two on the monitors.
Amid the laughter, the host flashed a thumbs up as he concluded, "All I can say is nice job for a first attempt, son. Better luck next time; I know you'll be able to make it to number one if you keep trying."
"We have a great show for you tonight... Our guests are..."
Notes: While writing Ron's booking scene (and later, while writing the GJ interrogation, because it was so dry and factual), I kept flashing to the inevitable jokes that would be made about Ron's mug shot, given his predictable pattern of rapid rise and equally rapid fall - and since word leaked out of what he had done (saving Kim), the coming fall is all but inevitable. All three of the other referenced mug shots are still readily available on the internet if you're interested in viewing them, but I must confess that I'd love to see an artist's version of Ron's mug shot based on the descriptions if anyone's feeling especially artistically inclined. You'll see a bit of this in a later part, but in general that's about all that will be needed.
Segment 8: Dr. Director's Suspicions
Version A - Assassin
Kim blinked. "What does that have to do with..." she suddenly halted as the light began to dawn. "Ron."
"Precisely. Still flushed from victory, having dismantled WEE, a heroic survivor feared dead is miraculously found. Naturally, he is brought to headquarters. And, when he and I are together, either immediately after his rescue, or at some future date, after he's collected sufficient intelligence to suit Gemini's needs..." she trailed off, letting Kim fill in the blanks.
"It makes a certain... bizarre kind of sense. But we're talking about Ron," Kim insisted.
Version B - Elaborating on a Theory
"Precisely. Still flush with victory, having dismantled WEE, a heroic survivor that was feared dead is miraculously found. Naturally, he is brought to GJ headquarters. And, when he and I are together, either immediately after his rescue - or possibly at some future date, after he's collected sufficient intelligence about GJ and Team Possible to suit Gemini's needs..." she trailed off, letting Kim fill in the blanks. "Or perhaps my death is too simple a motive. What if instead, Gemini places a completely trusted agent in the heart of both his primary enemies' organizations - one who is beyond reproach and with impeccable credibility. What better way to foment evil and avoid reprisals than a pipeline into the planning and operations of the very people tasked with bringing him down?"
Notes: A bit of Dr. Director's paranoia explained, then elaborated on in the later draft. This was cut in favor of leaving it more or less up to the reader to fill in the nature of Gemini's plot, since much of it is implicit in what they are looking for while examining Ron.
Final Notes: Well there you have it... Hopefully you've found these excerpts interesting, as an exercise in the creative process if nothing else.