The Reason

Author's Note: This next chapter will have music lyrics combined with the narrative. Couldn't resist, after all, I am Luverofsong. This is my first attempt at music fanfiction, so, please be gentle with any criticism. Also, fare warning. There is some fluff in this chapter, but it is reasonable for the moments contained. RiannaShadow, thank you for your review.

Disclaimer: The song: "The Reason," does not belong to me. It belongs to Hoobastank.

Sam rolled over in bed and faced the sunlight, only this time without blinding pain. She glanced at her clock, which read 12 pm. She had only been asleep for two hours, she felt like it had been several. She rolled out of bed and walked to her vanity. After glancing at

her disheveled appearance and red, rimmed eyes, she glanced down at her family photo.

She traced it with her finger, as if fixating it in her mind. Mixed feelings of confidence and uncertainty washed over her.

With a determined look in her eyes, she straightened her hair and smoothed out her clothes. Dang't, if she could face the Goblin King, she can face her family. With those final thoughts, she walked out of her bedroom and down the stairs.

I'm not a perfect person,

there are many things I

wish I didn't do

Toby looked up to find Sam entering the living room. He put down the phone he had in his hands for the past hour. He threw her a concerned look as she sat down next to him on the couch.

"Feeling any better?"

"Yeah, but, there is something we need to talk about."

but I continue learning

"Shoot, shrimp."

"Toby, do you remember that first kiss you had with Chelsea Knett?"

"Yeah, that girl gave a whole, new definition to the word french kiss. Then I remember a little pest broke it all up before I could round second." Toby's face went from playful to guilty when he saw his sister's sad eyes.

I never meant to do those things to you

and so I have to say before I go

"Sam, you do know that I never meant what I said to you that day."

Sam looked at him with a shocked expression on her face. "You actually remember that!"

"Yeah, I felt really guilty after that happened. But, you were a smart kid, I mean, you knew I was lying, right?" Toby's eyes widened when he found the obvious answer in his sister's eyes. "Oh, Sam. I forgot how naïve you were then. We were so proud of you, Sam. I can't count how many times I heard Sarah bragging about you to her friends. She told me that she knew you would be someone. She said that you were a determined, spunky, loving, talented, little girl, who reached for her dreams. And I had to go and mess it all up for you."

and I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me

to change who I used to be

a reason to start over new

and the reason is you

"First of all," Sam said, eyes flashing. "Don't you dare blame yourself for my problems. We were kids, Toby. What you said to me that day was not the cause of my problems, it was just a part of them. I was your younger sister, I believed everything you said. Neither one of us should take the blame for that moment. The blame should be set on the fact that we were young and didn't know any better." Sam paused for a moment, looking intently at her brother. Toby was quiet for a second, his mind whirling over the events that had happened over the past few days.

"Shrimp, I am sorry." There, he had said it. Nothing fancy, no flowery words, just fact.

"I am sorry too, string bean," Sam smiled solemnly. Seconds later she threw her arms around him, her eyes watering.

I am sorry that I hurt you

it's something I must live with

every day and all the pain I put you

through, I wish that I could take

it all away and be the one who

catches all your tears

"I promise you, Toby, things are going to be a lot different." Sam said, clinging to him. "I lied to everyone, even myself. I want to change. I am trying to find my way back to myself. I need you Toby. I need all of you."

Toby pulled away , wiping the tears off his sister's face with the back of his hand. "Sam, you will never be alone. We all love you and will be there for you. But, as far as figuring yourself out, that's up to you. You've taken the first step, now all you can do is move forward."

Sam smiled to herself and whispered, "The way forward is sometimes the way back."

"What?"

"Nothing, Toby. I just understand now."

That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me

to change who I used to be

the reason to start over new

and the reason is you

"Whatever that means," Toby replied, somewhat irritated. He patted her hand and glanced at the phone.

"Toby, what is it," Sam said, noticing his sudden change in mood.

"Before you came down I was on the phone, with Nancy."

"Ohhhh."

"Yeah, we had another fight. I mean, sure, I gave her an espresso machine on our anniversary. Yeah, we broke up three times last year, because supposedly I ignored her. Okay, we still date other people, though we have been going out for three years. But, we are both still young, we have plenty of time for commitment, right?"

"Toby, call me crazy, but it sounds like you have a fear of commitment."

Sam and Toby turned their heads toward Sarah's voice, who had entered unnoticed.

"Okay, you're crazy." Toby stood up from the couch and turned his back away from his sisters. He sighed aloud and said, "What am I going to do?"

"Do you love her, Toby," Sarah asked, coming up behind him.

"I don't know," he replied hopelessly.

"Could you imagine your life without her," she prompted.

Toby didn't reply for a moment, then he replied, bitterly, "Sarah, you have never had a steady relationship in your life, you are not qualified for love advise." Toby glanced at the hurt expression on Sarah's face and instantly regretted the comment.

"I am sorry, Sarah. I didn't mean it."

"Oh, you didn't. No, Toby, you were right. But, believe it or not, I do know what it is like to give up a dream. I don't want you to end up wondering about what might have been." "Trust me, I know," she added under her breath.

Sam eyed Sarah curiously at her last statement, amazed she actually heard her sister's quiet comment. She got up from the couch and walked toward them. She reached Toby and said quietly, "The way foreword is sometimes the way back, Toby."

Sarah's eyes widened, wondering if she had heard her sister's words correctly. Her brother's next action, however, made her forget the pondering statement. Toby began to walk toward the door, grabbing the keys to his car on the lamp table.

"Guys, tell Mom and Dad that I will call them to let them know when I will be home."

"Toby, what are you doing," the girls asked in unison.

"I am going to catch a dream." With that he grabbed his jacket and walked out the door, leaving his sisters alone.

Sarah looked at Sam, clearly wanting to be everywhere but near her sister.

"Well, I have to go wash my hair."

But, before Sarah could even move Sam threw her arms around her, hugging her tightly.

"I am sorry, Sarah, for everything."

Sarah held her sister tightly, like a child who needed comforting. Whatever anger Sarah had left in her had faded away to that of sudden relief.

"Me too, Sam."

I' m not a perfect person

I never meant to do those

things to you and so I have

to say before I go that I just

want you to know

I've found a reason for me

to change who I used to be

the reason to start over knew

and the reason is you

I've found a reason to show

a side of me you didn't know

a reason for all that I do,

and the reason is you.