"Hopeless"
By: Lost Soul
Disclaimer: yawn yawn the same thing over
and over again... I don't own Sailor Moon, or
any of its characters... okay? Good...
AN's: Hey! I'm back again, with the third chapter of Hopeless. I would like to thank every
one who reviewed this story so far. (gives big hug to the computer hoping reviewers will get it)
heehee...
LoL.. and ffgirlmoonie don't worry bout it,like I said before, 'its all gud'.
Enough of my rambling.. on with the story..
! Chapter 3- Unbelievable !
"Well... Darien kind of went to her house,
pushed her up against the wall, and kissed her"
Amber said in one long breath.
I was shocked to say the least. Again tears
formed in my eyes, "I don't care, I DON'T CARE...
he doesn't belong to me, he's not mine... I
don't care" I yelled as I started to cry.
"Sere? Are you ok? Sere, come on, don't cry!
He's not worth your tears..." Amber said, trying
to make me calm down.
I ignored her, I didn't want to hear anything,
I grabbed the closest thing to me, my teddy bear,
and threw it across my room. I was so angry.
After when I calmed down a little, Amber told me
that she would talk to me later, and hung up.
I was still so hurt, I cried so much, I didn't
know why it bugged me so much though. He was
just my first boyfriend, and I knew it wouldn't
last anyway.
I looked outside from my window, it was midnight
but I saw so many people walking outside. Those
people were so happy looking, no care in the
world... and I wondered, 'Why can't I be like
that? Why can't I understand that he never ever
loved me to begin with?'
With all these questions running through my mind,
I finally fell asleep after awhile, thinking 'It's
going to be alright tomorrow... I'm not going to
show him that what he did hurt me...'
The next day, I went to school in the morning
andI saw Michelle. I didn't even want to look
at her, that's how disgusted I was. Then I saw
Darien walking towards the school. So I walked
up to him.
"Hi, Darien" I said with a tone of uncharacter-
istic sarcasm that I never knew that I had.
'Um... Hi Serena,' he said cautiously.
" Darien, I can't believe you... You know that I
still love you!" I exclaimed, fighting to keep
my tears inside.
'How could I what? What are you talking about?'
he asked, trying to look innocent.
"Forget it! I have something to give you...
close your eyes" I said.
He looked at me as if I was crazy, but he still
didn't look me in the eye, and said 'No way,
you're probably going to slap me.'
I couldn't hold in my smile. He knew what normal
girls would have done in my place. I looked up at
him, laughed, and said, "Why would I want to slap
you? You know what, never mind. I hope you're
happy with her." Then I walked away.
The next few weeksdidn't goso good, I always saw
Michelle and Darien together. At the basket ball
games, the school trips, after school... everywhere.
Days... Weeks... Months passed slowly and I was
feeling better. I successfully avoided Darien for
about two months and I was slowly getting over
him too.
I was starting totalk to a few other guys,
like Josh and Shawn. Oh my gosh, they were the
sweetest guys that I ever met! But some how I
found some sort of flaw in them.
The end of December and the beginning of January
came around, andout of no where Darienstarted
talking to me again. At first it was just 'hi' and 'bye'
and then actual conversations started happening.
A week into January, he called me. I thought he
needed help with some work or something, so I
picked up.
"Hello?"
'Hey Sere, what's up?' answered Darien's sweet voice.
"Hey Darien, nothing really, you?"
'Nothing... Sere, I have to tell you something,
but once I get started, you can't stop me ok?'
This was unexpected and I didn't know what was
going on, so I just said "Ok."
I could hear him take a deep breath, then he
started, "Sere, I'm so sorry for what I did, I
wasn't thinking. Every night, when I close my eyes,
I can see your tear filled eyes. It haunts my
every thought. I'm so sorry, Sere. When I was
younger, I always wished that I'd find someone
just like you, and when I finally found you, I
treated you so badly. If I could, I would turn
back time and take back what I said, and take
away all your pain and tears. You are my heart my
soul, my everything. I know I made a huge mistake
by letting you go, but I promise I will never make
the same mistake twice. Sere, I want tosay
something to you, but I'm afraid that you
might get mad... but I'm going to say it anyway...
I Lov... never mind, I can't say it. Sere, you
have something special, that's what made me fall
in love with you, I hope you never lose it.
Whoever you end up with in the future is really
lucky to have you. I'm sorry, please forgive me,
but I'd understand if you didn't."
I was speechless, no words came out of my mouth.
He probably thought that I was angry and he said,
"Well yeah, that's all, bye..." I still couldn't
make words come out of my mouth, so I just said
"Uh-huh". Then when I was about to turn off the
phone, I heard, "I Love You Sere" then click.
I couldn't believe what I just heard. He still
loves me... he apologized to me... HE STILL
LOVES ME!
Just like the night I found out about Michelle
and Darien, I couldn't sleep, I kept thinking
about what Darien said. He thought I had
something special...
'There's nothing special about me though.' I
told myself. 'Does he really mean what he said?
But it sounded so planned out... Arg! Why is this
happening to me? Can't he just stay with one girl?
First Raye, then me, then Michelle, and now me
again?' I sighed and looked up at my bed room
ceiling, which was adorned with glow-in-the-dark
space stickers. I stared at the cresent moon shaped
sticker right above me and thought,'What am I
going to do?'
The next day at school, I wanted to talk to him so
badly.My morning classes seemed to be taking
forever to finish.
My last class before lunch was science, and for
some odd reason, the second hand seemed to be going
EXTREMELY slow today. Finally whenthe lunch
bell rang,I took my stuff and put it in my locker
and went upstairs to where his lockers were. He was
standing with Andrew and Marques. I went up to
him and askedif I could talk to him alone. He
was kind ofreluctant, but he came.
We walked out the school doors in silence. There
was a very uncomfortable silence between us.
Even in the freezing cold weather of January we
went to the benches outside on the field and sat
down facing the school.
The uncomfortable silence remained for a little
while longer, then I turned to him and said,
"So...About yesterday..."
He quickly turned away, avoiding my eyes, again,
andsaid, "Yeah, I'd understand if you don't
forgiveme..."
I looked down at my hands, hoping that maybe
something, anything, would just show up, telling
me what to say. I wanted to tell him that I was
still hurting, and that my heart was still in
pieces. But I looked at him again, and it looked
like he was ready to get up and leave, so I just
said whatever came to my head.
"I never said I didn't forgive you, it's just
that... It's just that I'm still hurting Darien!
My heart is STILL in pieces because of the past!"
there I finally said it. Now things just popped
into my head, things to say, and images of the
past two months. "You hurt me so much, do you know
how many nights I've cried because of you? Do
you have any idea of all the pain that I've gone
through? No, Darien, the week after we broke up
you went to Michelle, you think that I didn't know?
I have friends all around here, did you think that
you could keep that away from me? Darien, that day
when I found out about you and her, I cried so much.
No matter what I do, I can't forget what happened
in November. I'll tell you something that I've
Never told anyone. Darien, I knew that you were
going to break up with me, I had a dream about it,
but I didn't want to embarrass you. And that day
when you told me it was over, you didn't just say
it to me, you told some younger kids to tell me.
By that time, not jus our grade knew, but all of
the younger ones knew too. I would have NEVER done
that to you. You made me look like such a fool. That
hurt even worse. But I believe in second chances...
and I still love you, so I forgive you..."
By the end of my little speech, my eyes were pouring
with tears, but not tears of sorrow, tears of joy.
Darien got up from where he was sitting and took me
by the shoulders and gave me a long hug. Then he
moved back, and looked me straight into my eyes and
asked, "Will you go out with me...?"
I looked down at the muddy/snowy ground... I didn't
want to get hurt again, but I was so happy when I was
with him. 'Just one more try' I told myself. Then I
looked back at him and said with a smile, "Of course
I will."
He took me by my hips, and kissed me so deeply... I
felt as if everything in the world had disappeared
and it was just me and him... Me and him... against
the world... against all hard times. I felt so safe
again, with his arms around me... but there was
something in my heart that was telling me to slow
down, before I give him back my heart, my soul, and
my love.
To Be Continued...
AN's: yes yes yes.. another chapter done.. well you can't rele count it as DONE cuz
well.. i had it done since last summer...now i have to start writing again. Well
i hope you liked it...
OH.. and to answer the question about Darien's age.. um.. he's going to be
the same age as Sere cuz.. well i said so! heehee..
Basiclly this story takes place from the middle of grade7 till.. im not sure.
I will put up the "How It Started" intro part-thing soon tyme. Right now, they are in
grade 8.. yup yup.. they are... im sorry if its confusing.. its like one of my first stories.
So.. soo... now its time for me to sleep good night.. be good.. (beggz on knees)
and review pleasee! But if you dont, i guess its ok.. (sniff sniff)