Title: Baby Love
By: Nodakskip
Beta by: Theo
Rated: PG 13 if that.
Disclaimer: All Buffy/Angel belong to FOX & its bumbling sidekick Joss.
Category: Buffy/Angel Crossover
Summary: A weird fic that is my take on one of the popular themes that have been done a lot on FF Net in the last few years.
---
Los Angeles, California
January, 2002
Xander Harris waited, while Cordelia used his cell phone to call in her vision to the vampire Champion called Angel.
It had been several months since he'd left Sunnydale, a.k.a. the Hellmouth. Harris had gone on a new voyage of discovery - after his life reached a...a turning point, of sorts.
Anya had decided that while he was a Viking in bed, he did not have the potential to make her lots of money. That in and of itself wouldn't have been so bad, but the building his crew had been working on had been finished - and the bidding for the next job had gotten stuck in bureaucratic hell.
So Xander had ended up without a job, the key thing needed to keep Anya happy as it turned out. They'd had a huge fight about it, with her accusing him of getting cold feet about their upcoming marriage - and him accusing her of never being able to stop threatening him, with her demon past...
In the end, Anya had thrown his ring back at him and told Xander they were through. He did have some money stored up, and after he'd found himself to be pushed so far on the outs with the Slay-gang that even SPIKE knew more than him about what was happening lately - the carpenter had simply hit the road, and not looked back.
"Thanks for waiting," Cordelia said, as she returned his phone and Xander snapped back to reality. "At least this vision didn't hurt that much!"
"No problem..." He gave her a look. "You need to go in?"
"Hell, no!" Cordy said quickly. "My entire life is that damn office! So I like doing non-demon-y things, every now and then!" (And I want to enjoy my life while I still can,) she thought pessimistically, as Cordy walked to the driver's side of her jeep. "Well, now that we've had dinner, any ideas on the movie?"
"Not sure what's come out in the last-" Xander started to say, before they both heard a scream in an alley across the street.
----
Unknown heavenly dimension
One day later
The Powers That Be, contrary to popular rumor, manifest similarly in their pan-dimensional reality as we do in ours. And at that moment the female Power named Julien sat observing the earthly plane tiredly, while she skimmed the scrolls of what was to come. When she came to one item, that was something she couldn't believe that she was reading. "This can't right!"
"Mistress?" one of the Powers' underlings asked at her outburst.
"This scroll!" Julien said, getting upset. "It says that Jasmine will be reborn on Earth soon!"
"Jasmine?" the servant asked, confused - having never heard the name before.
"I meant..." An unpronounceable whistling, windy sound issued from her mouth. "Jasmine is what the humans will call her, anyway," the Power added. "It's that no-good piece of trash that we exiled ages ago, to that damned insect world!"
Understanding still eluded the lesser being. "I thought she was never to be allowed to return to Earth? She almost destroyed it, the last time."
"I know! How could my husband have missed this?" Julien asked, amazed. "Jasmine must not be allowed to come to being!"
"Whatever Mistress wants," the servant responded. Inwardly, he was just glad she had found something to occupy her time. For he had been instructed by her mate, to keep her occupied. Lord Ternar did not want his wife interrupting the 'guy' trip to the dimension of heavenly pleasures, AGAIN.
"I'll just bet this is all that lowlife Belinus's idea!" Julien suddenly said, as she thought about her husband's leech of a best friend. "He was involved with that Jasmine bitch, the last time she was on the human plane…"
Before she could speculate more on her nemesis, one of the new Oracles appeared. "Forgive the intrusion," the multi-colored male said as he bowed his head.
"Yes, yes, what do you want?" Julien asked him impatiently.
"Your ensouled vampire Champion has come to mine and my sister's domain," the brother Oracle responded. "He begs an audience, with you and yours."
"My husband made it clear long ago, that the half-demon seer would not be brought back to that particular lower being," Julien said with a sigh.
"He has not come regarding his old seer," the Oracle said. "It is a fact that his new seer is performing satisfactorily-"
Suddenly, Julien actually found this interesting. "His new seer? The human female called Cordelia?" she asked, recalling the scroll she'd just read.
"Yes," the Oracle humbly told her.
(Hmmmmm. Maybe I can use this,) the female Power thought. (Many things for Jasmine's arrival have been put in place. But there must still be a way to stop it...)
---
The new domain of the Oracles, Los Angeles
A few moments later
Angel stood waiting, with the new replacement female Oracle. "So, were you related to the last two…?" he asked, trying to make small talk.
"Yes," the female in the toga answered. "They were my kin."
"You're siblings?"
"Not in the way you would understand it, lower being," was the calm reply.
Angel might have pressed further but in a flash of light, Cordelia and the bed the hurt Xander lay on appeared. "Cordy?" he asked at once, going over to his friend and seer. "What are you two doing here?"
"Don't ask me," the long-haired woman said, as she checked her feverish ex-boyfriend.
"You are here, because we have agreed to help you," said the male Oracle, as he reappeared next to his sister.
"You will?" Cordelia asked, very happy. "Well, thank God! So just-"
"He will not be with you today," another female voice spoke from nowhere. "Will I do?"
"Ah… hello?" Angel said, looking around.
A tall, curly-haired blond woman appeared in a very ornate toga. "Greetings, lower beings. And know that I have decided to aid your friend."
"And, you are?" Angel asked, not liking the fact that he didn't know the woman Xander's life might be hanging on.
"I am one of the Powers That Be," she told him regally. "And that is all you need to know."
"You can heal Xander?" Cordelia asked. And a quieter voice she asked, "And maybe me?"
"You?" Angel demanded, turning sharply to his friend. "Why do you need to be-"
"Because, Champion," Julien said cutting off his question. "The visions have been slowly destroying her brain, over the last two years."
"WHAT!" Angel roared.
"Be silent, in the presence of your betters!" Julien said cuttingly, at Angel's outburst. "She knew there was no way for earthen magic to heal her, so she vowed to help until she could do so no longer. She is a Champion for it, as you are." She looked at Xander on the bed. "As is he, in his own way."
Julien kept looking at Xander, who was shaking slightly in his fever delirium. "The caster of the curse is dead?" she asked.
"Ah, yeah," Cordelia replied, avoiding Angel's gaze. "Xander was able to take him out, but only after he did the magic mumbo-jumbo-"
"Then you have a problem."
"What kind?" Cordy demanded.
Julien slowly walked around the bed in the center of the large temple. "If your enemy was still among the living, I could undo the curse with a merely a thought. But now? It cannot be undone, with his shade in the pits of Hell..."
She stopped moving when she came around again to Cordelia. Looking the human woman in the eyes, she said, "There is one way. I may not be able to remove the curse, but I can get around it."
"How?" Angel and Cordelia asked at the same time.
"Be warned from the outset. It will require a great sacrifice on your part, seer," the Power told the human. "Only you can get your friend through this."
Cordelia looked back at Angel for a moment, before she sighed, "Of course it'll require pain, sacrifice and all that crap. That's how our lives work!" She looked at the bed, as Xander started to convulse a little. "It's going to be major, isn't it?"
"Yes," was the Power's reply. "Your life will not be the same."
Cordelia sighed heavily. "Well, I know that despite all the bad stuff between us… Xander would do whatever it took to keep ME alive. I just hope he knows that I'd do the same for him..."
"Do not ever doubt it," Julien said with pompous grandeur. "You are both Champions, after all."
---
The Hyperion Hotel, Los Angeles
Two and a half weeks later
"Hello?"
Wesley and Angel came out of the office at the sound of the familiar voice. "Hello, Buffy..." Angel said softly and then stopped.
His eyes instantly went wide, as he smelled something very familiar. Both from Buffy, and elsewhere.
Angel's gaze finally settled on his grandchilde. "Spike," he spat with cold hatred. "Why are you here?"
"Oh, come on mate!" Spike laughed. "Can't I come 'n see how my magnificent poof of a sire is doing, every once in a while?"
"Why is he here?" Wesley asked the Slayer and the redheaded witch, for Willow Rosenberg was also present. And the fact was the former Watcher had no love for the other vampire, either.
"He insisted on coming," Buffy shrugged. With a look to Angel she asked, "So. Will you two be able to play nice?"
"And THAT'S why he's really here," Angel said, annoyed. "He knew I wouldn't dust him, because you were sure to ask me not to. And he wants to rub my face in it."
"Hey, now!" Spike said, amused, as he threw up his hands. "I'm just 'ere to meet the new member of the family, is all. Little Conner is my kin as well, ya know. He's got a bit of me swimming around in his veins-"
"There is nothing of you within Conner," Angel said very harshly. "And just for the record. Go within 10 paces of him - and chip or not, Buffy or not, I'll stake you myself..."
"All that aside, Conner is not here right now," Wesley said, as the two vampires stared each other down. "Fred and Gunn are watching over him."
"Okay," Buffy said. "Then what's the what? End of the world?"
"No," Wesley told her, as he motioned to the two couches nearby. "If you please?"
The two female Scooby gang members sat down normally. Spike just leaned on the arm of the couch. "We called you here," Wesley started. "To inform you of something."
"Fire away," Buffy said simply, as she sat back on the couch cushions.
Angel sat across from her. "Thing is, Xander's been in town recently. For quite a while too, to be honest."
"He has!" Willow said happily, having missed her friend. "Is he here now? Can I see him?"
"Yes," Angel answered. "However, before he comes out, I've got to tell you - there was...an incident."
Spike started to chuckle. "Old Droopy Boy got stuck 'imself in another mess, did he?"
"What Xander did was actually very brave, I'll have you know!" Wesley scolded the blond vampire.
"Don't tell me. He jumped into a fight without thinking and got himself hurt, didn't he?" Buffy asked with a groan.
"Buffy," Angel said sternly. "Xander's not the hindrance you seem to think he is. Never has been, never will be-"
"Oh, come on Angel!" Buffy said in annoyance, as she sat up straight. "He's a great guy, yeah - but he can't fight his way out of a wet paper bag! He should just stay out of this sorta thing!"
"Hey!" Willow called out. "Come on, he's not that bad Buff!"
Angel just looked to his former girlfriend. "Has sleeping with Spike really changed your attitude about him that much, Buffy?"
There was a terrible, ghastly silence. Then Willow and Wesley, who were both unable to believe it, started bombarding the room with loud exclamations...
Angel put his fingers between his teeth and let out a loud whistle. "Enough!" He then gestured to Willow. "You both get one question, and that's it. Ladies first."
The redhead looked freaked, as her best friend cringed at her expression. Spike just smiled though, having nothing to hide or feel ashamed about. "It's true? And if so, how long?" the witch finally asked.
"Yeah. And a month, nearly two," Buffy answered dully.
Wesley just shook his head. "Why?"
The Slayer shook her head. "You wouldn't understand it. No one who hasn't been torn out of Heaven could."
There was another uncomfortable silence, before Spike of all people changed the subject. "Well, anyway, we were discussin' the Donut Boy - weren't we?"
"Yeah. And let me just say if he wasn't a good fighter when it counts, Buffy, then how was he able to stay alive when the Anointed One had everyone else kidnapped? I fought side by side with him to free Willow and the others, back then. And the fact that even Angelus backed off from fighting him twice, should tell you something-" Angel said
"And let's not forget the time he stopped those zombies from blowing the Hellmouth open, with that bomb," Wesley said from his spot.
"Oh, please!" Spike snorted. "Don't tell me you actually believe that bloody cock 'n bull story?"
"Over anything that you would ever say, yes," Wesley replied coldly.
"You got a problem with me, Percy?"
"Tell me, Spike, does Vienna during 1963 ring any bells for you?" When the vampire shrugged, the British man added, "You were slaughtering people at an orphanage then, when a team of Watchers led by my father found you. You killed two of his squad members, before you escaped - and the funny thing is, I went through the Watcher academy with the sons of those men. Granted, we're not close or anything, but I can't help wondering what they'd do - if I rang them up, and told them where the killer of their fathers is based nowadays..."
"You wouldn't 'ave the stones to do that," Spike said at once, but with less certainty than he would have liked.
Wesley took off his glasses. "And the downside would be what, exactly?"
"Shut up, both of you!" Willow suddenly yelled. "Angel, just tell us what happened with Xander. Everyone else can make insulting comments later!" She looked at Buffy and added, "When I'm not there to hear it!" The Slayer looked at her in slight surprise; she'd thought her redheaded friend shared her views about this.
"Alright," the Champion started. "The thing is, about two and a half weeks ago Xander and Cordelia were leaving a restaurant - when they heard a scream in an alley. A demon warlock was attacking a young teenage couple-"
"The young woman had rejected the demon's advances, as it were," Wesley added.
Angel nodded. "So, the demon tried to kill the boyfriend in a very painful way. It cast a curse on him, however Xander was able to knock the boy out of the way in time."
"It hit Xander, didn't it?" Willow demanded. "The curse… it nailed him instead!"
"Yeah," Angel responded. "He was able to kill the demon, unfortunately, and it wasn't till they got back here that the curse start to take effect."
"What kind of curse was it?" Buffy asked, not really wanting to know. She already knew it was bad, or the Fang Gang wouldn't have called them here to LA.
"We don't know the name of it," Wesley said. "We just discovered what it did."
"And that would be?" Buffy pressed.
"Keep in mind, the curse was meant to be cast against the boyfriend of the girl that the demon desired," Angel said. "Basically, it works on males that have - gone through puberty."
"Oy! You're saying it hurt his little…" Spike said, with a large grin as he held up his pinky finger.
Angel ignored his grandchilde. "It would have killed him within a few days. And those particular magicks haven't been used in so long, that no one we knew had any idea how even to treat it. Let alone, cure it."
"Xander's dying!" Willow asked, horrifed.
"He was," Wesley said. "Until we sought help from the Powers That Be."
"The people that Cordy gets visions from?" the Slayer asked.
"Doesn't matter," Willow said quickly, after Buffy's question. "Did they save Xander?"
"In a way," Wesley replied uneasily.
"In a way?" Willow yelled at him. "What the hell does that mean?"
The ex-Watcher just pulled a small short-range walkie-talkie from his pocket. "Cordelia," he said into it. "We're ready for you now."
After just a few moments, the doors to the hotel's outdoor garden opened, and Cordelia walked in carrying something in her arms. The Sunnydale trio watched, as she wordlessly came over and sat next to Angel.
When she repositioned the bundle in her arms to show what she had, Buffy looked at Angel in complete confusion. "I thought you said Connor wasn't here today?"
"That's not Connor," Angel said gently. While Cordelia just spoke bluntly, "This is Xander."
Not a word was spoken, for a full minute and a half… before Spike almost fell down laughing. "Oh bleedin' heck, this is too bloody good for words! I musta been staked, and gone to vampire Heaven!"
Not taking her eyes off the baby in Cordelia's arms, Buffy spoke harshly. "Spike, shut up right now. Or I'll oblige and stake you myself!"
The blond vampire looked at her, still amused, but as he saw the look on her face -William the Bloody quickly shut up. "Right then, this is serious..."
Willow came over, and bent down in front of Cordy and the baby. "That's… it's… you mean, that's really Xander?" she finally got out.
"Yeah..." Cordelia told her. She looked down to the baby. "Oh yeah, you're my little Xander aren't you?" she cooed. "Yes you are! Yes you are!"
Willow reeled back in shock at that, almost so that she nearly fell on her rear. "Why are you talking to him like that?"
"What, am I supposed to yell at him?" Cordelia scoffed. "I mean, do I look like a drunken Jessica Harris to you?"
"What is going on here!" Buffy demanded.
"They don't know? Tell them everything, Angel!" Cordelia commanded, as she started to play with Baby Xander.
"Well, you see…" Angel started to say. "Okay, the curse would have slaughtered anyone male, that had gone through puberty. And the only way to prevent it killing him, was to revert him back to this…"
"Well, revert him back! This is ridiculous!" Willow demanded.
Cordelia hugged Xander tight at that suggestion. "Are you nuts? I'm not gonna let you kill him that way!"
"Well, I-I-I didn't say kill him!" Willow said, upset. "Just revert him back, now that the curse has dissipated!"
"Willow, you obviously don't get it. Those magicks are still in place, the curse hasn't gone anywhere," Wesley told the young witch. "In fact, that particular death mark could stay active on Xander for years, we have no way to tell. At least this way… he lives."
"Lives?" Willow yelled. "You call this living?"
"Keep it down!" Cordelia hissed at her. "You're upsetting him!"
The seer then gently rocked the baby in her arms. "Hey, it's okay Xander. It's all right, mommy's here..."
"Mommy?" Buffy and Willow yelled at once, causing Baby Xander to cry a little.
"I already told you two, shut your holes!" An upset Cordelia got up, and carried Xander over to the round couch in the middle of the lobby. She glared at Angel and Wesley, "Now finish telling them already!"
Angel decided to simply go for broke. "The Power that we met reverted Xander back to day one. Or rather, a week before that." Before Willow could demanded to know what that meant, he kept going. "Cordelia was impregnated with Xander… and gave birth to him in the hospital, last week. And as you can see, mother and child have...bonded."
"Oh my God!" Buffy whispered as Willow could only blink, a blank expression on her face.
Wesley took over the story. "No one knew the truth, of course, and thus as soon as the birth certificate was filed - Cordelia was automatically made Xander's guardian. She is technically his mother, after all. And in the eyes of the law, the older version of Xander Harris is now missing, presumed dead."
"Mother?" Willow managed to eek out.
Cordelia spoke, as she adjusted the blanket little Xander was wrapped up in. "That's right. He's now Alexander Noah Chase." Thinking it might be asked, the new mother added, "He always hated the name Lavelle."
"This is just..." Buffy tried to say, as she was still in the grip of shock. Willow didn't seem to even be breathing at this point, but Spike was still just all smiles and happy faces.
"Bottom line, there's nothing you or anyone else can do about it," Angel told them with a pseudo-sigh. "Xander's just going to have to live here, and grow up with Connor."
"Yeah, and you're just going to love playing with your older cousin, aren't you?" Cordelia said teasingly, as she let Baby Xander try to grip her finger. "And now that Mommy's little brain trouble has been fixed, we'll all be one big happy family, won't we?"
As if in answer, the baby Xander giggled a little.
---
The realm of the Powers That Be
The same time
"What in the name of all that is good and holy is this?"
Ternar looked towards his friend. "What upsets you so, Belinus?"
The upset Power held up the scroll that he was reading. "It's changed! Jasmine's birth mother-to-be has had a child already!"
"How can that be?" Ternar asked, amazed, as he looked over the scroll.
"I do not know. But this is not right!" Belinus said, very upset. "The Cordelia human was created to be host for Jasmine... but in a very specific way. She had to be the firstborn! And now, the plan is ruined!"
"Someone must have changed things," Ternar surmised. "That is the only answer. It even says here that the demon Sahjhan will no longer be involved with that human..."
"Who could have done this?" Belinus demanded to know.
The other Powers nearby all shook their heads, all except one. "I had some free time to take care of that Sahjhan character, days ago."
"It was YOU?" Belinus yelled in shock. "But why would you change that which was preordained!"
"You know why!" Julien said hotly. "Jasmine was banished, never to return… ever! An opportunity arose to make sure that would remain the case, and so I took it." As she sat in her place in the Great Hall, she shrugged. "And for the record, had the humans looked harder - they would have found a cure for that curse. But this way… I get what I want."
Belinus looked to his old friend. "Lord Ternar, surely you cannot permit this transgression to remain-"
Julien just laughed, as Ternar got that 'deer in headlights' look that all males got - when asked to pick between their wives, and their best friends.
In any case, the female Power wasn't worried. She knew that her husband would never want to sleep on the cosmic equivalent of a couch, for the rest of eternity...
---
The Hyperion Hotel
Some time later…
Buffy sat by herself on the round couch, as she tried to get the new information she'd learned today to be fully accepted by her brain. She wasn't having much luck, when Willow came storming down the stairs - looking very freaked out.
"Get out of my mind!" Willow was saying to herself, as she rubbed her eyes.
"Willow?" Buffy asked her. "What's wrong… besides the obvious?"
"I… I…" Willow tried to say.
"Deep breaths, Wills," Buffy commanded. "Now, tell me what happened."
"Well, I… I went to talk to Cordelia…" the witch stammered. "I went into her room, and…"
"And what?"
"And she had her top off!" Willow yelled. "She was breast-feeding Xander!"
"Oh, that is just… EWWW!" Buffy gagged.
At that moment Anya came out of the office, where Wesley had just informed her of the news. She had driven to the city after she closed the Magic Box for the day. "What's wrong?" she asked seeing both girls freaking out.
"What's wrong!" Buffy said amazed at Anya's calm tone of voice. "For god sakes, Xander is a little baby! That's what's wrong!"
Anya just shrugged. "I've seen what that kind of curse can do to a male. Wesley is right, this way he lives."
"How can you be so cavalier about this!" Willow demanded of Xander's ex-love.
"There is nothing I can do to change it." Anya said simply. "Xander was a good man, and he will be again. Now is his new mother upstairs?"
"Oh yeah!" Willow said wincing at the image burned into her brain.
"Good." Anya said as she started for the stairs.
"What are you going to talk to her about?" Buffy asked.
"Xander informed me Cordelia lost all her money to those IRS people." Anya replied. "I'm going to help set up a good college fund for my ex. It's never too early." She started to climb the stairs but stopped at the third step. "I wonder…"
"You wonder what?" Willow asked still not liking how easy Anya was taking this.
Anya gave an amused look. "I can be the 'mature' older babysitter that helps him become a man when he is a teenager again."
"What?" Willow asked in shock.
"Oh I admit it will not be years yet till he's re-reaches his sexual peak…" Anya said. "But now one of the role playing games we played in the bedroom can be real!"
Willow just looked at the former demon in shock, while Buffy just shook her head. "Will you please stop talking?"
THE END