Title: The Greatest Love Of All
Author: Nodakskip
Rating: PG-13
Beta by: Theo
Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Buffy and Angel. And I'm poor, so please don't sue me over any of this.
Author's Notes: This isn't a Hercules/Xena crossover, although I guess some of the material mentioned could come from those shows. Also this may seem odd, but I like the odd ones. It's no fun if I just add to the countless fics like everyone is in a band on Fanfiction ( dot ) net. AU for Buffy season 3, after 'Amends' but before 'Gingerbread'.
Summary: A desperate Greek god, and a pair of scheming Oracles.
---
Sunnydale High Library, Sunnydale, California
Friday, January 8th 1999
4:35pm
"Good Lord!"
Both blonde and red-haired girls that were in the school library heard the Watcher's shout. "Giles!" Buffy Summers called out, as she and Willow Rosenberg ran to the door of the man's private office. "Are you okay?"
Rupert Giles looked up from his paper, and was surprised to see the looks of concern on his pupils' faces. "What?"
"You yelled," Willow stated with a gesture of sorts.
"Oh...OH!" he said with a bit of chagrin. "Terribly sorry..." Giles added, as he got up and took his papers to the main table. "It's only that I've just received the newest email newsletter from the British Museum in London..."
"How does that rate a 'good lord'?" Buffy wanted to know.
"Buffy, he's British. And that's what they do, remember?"
Giles just sighed, and laid the paper down to show the two girls what had caught his attention.
"Oooh, pretty!" Buffy said in delight, as she looked at the picture of the diamond-encrusted gold necklace. The large diamond in the center was what caught both girls' eyes, though.
"Wow," Willow whispered. "That's...27.12 carats? Oh yeah, that's one humongous diamond..."
"The necklace of Aphrodite?" Buffy asked Giles. "Never heard of it."
"If it is the Necklace," Giles told her, "then its worth to the culture of Greece is...well, incalculable."
"Aphrodite was the Greek goddess of love, right?" Willow asked, remembering the information in the Watcher's books from years ago.
"Love, beauty and sexual rapture," Giles told her. "The necklace is a very important piece of her mythology. Again, if it's the real artifact, then it could prove that the gods in some form...really did exist..."
"You mean, other than some crazy blonde lady saying she was a god?" Buffy joked. "No offense Giles, but back in LA, I saw quite a few people who claimed they were God...or Bob Vila, or whoever on the streets!"
"Yes, well, I doubt it will ever be proven now," Giles commented parathenetically. "And you're right, Buffy, several nefarious people back in the olden times were, were con men, and fooled the people to think they were gods or servants of the gods. However, the tests on the Necklace show that the diamonds and the gold are quite real. And it was found near one of Aphrodite's until-recently-lost temples."
"Is there a story behind it?" Willow wondered, thinking this was definitely better than her Spanish homework.
"Quite an interesting one, actually," Giles said, as he sat on the table edge. "Legend says that there was once a battle for control of Mount Olympus. Possibly with the Titans, but either way - during the battle, Aphrodite was badly hurt. Now since those so-called gods weren't mortal people, they-they couldn't do as we would and just go see a doctor. Even though they took human form, they were theoretically based on, well, different sorts of energy."
"Energy?" Buffy asked, not getting it.
"Yes," Giles explained. "As I said - she was the goddess of love, beauty and sexual rapture. For every couple that was in love, or shared in the act of sexual pleasure...it, it gave her strength. And so to help her recover from her terrible wounds a more direct supply of, 'love' if you will, was needed..."
----
The Chamber of the Oracles, Mount Olympus
Over three thousand years ago
The goddess Artemis held in her hands the Necklace that Hephaestus, husband to Aphrodite, had created. "It has to be done," she told the twin Oracles.
"What you ask-" the female Oracle started.
"-will not be viewed well by those in positions of higher power," the male Oracle finished. "They value the mortals..."
"As do I!" Artemis said.
"When they do not incur your wrath, which is a rather frequent occurrence," the brother stated shortly.
The Greek goddess shook her head. "That matters not for the moment, now I need a mortal couple for this...act. And surely there must be some suitable mortals, somewhere on the face of the Earth?"
"There is one mortal couple that does fit your needs..." the sister said, as she waved her hand over the gazing pool in front of them.
When the image took shape, the three celestial beings watched a pair of young mortals talking. "Their surroundings and dress are unfamiliar to me," Artemis said, as she watched the two young people appear to argue.
"They are from another time," the male Oracle informed her. "Thousands of years into the future."
"Then why show them to me for this?" the goddess demanded.
The female didn't react to Artemis' tone. "Because they can be removed from their time, and brought here for what you need - with no damage to the world as it is now."
Artemis shook her head. "What of the damage to their world and time?"
"Taking them away for what is needed, may in fact save their world and time," the male Oracle said.
Artemis was intrigued. "And how is that?"
"The female is the one to give birth to the Destroyer - that is a rogue member of the Powers That Be."
"The Powers That Be?" Artemis said in disgust. "Even Ares despises them and their tactics!"
The female Oracle again ignored the goddess's outburst. "The couple was destined for greatness, and perhaps the greatest love of all; however the dark forces of the Destroyer separated them, so that-" A whistling, windy noise was heard, "-could be born a few years later and claim the mortal world for herself."
The Greek goddess now felt disgust to the depths of her very core, but shook it off. "If they're broken up," Artemis then asked, "then how could they be what I need?"
"Your sister goddess IS love," the male stated. "When the couple is given to her, her dominion will restore them to each other - and they will then restore her strength, ten-fold."
The Greek deity was in no mood to further argue the point. "Very well," Artemis said shortly, as she left to prepare herself for the journey. "And if they still sleep in the halls of time, here and now? Then I must go to them - at once..."
After the goddess had gone, the two Oracles looked at each other. "You choose a dangerous path, this may alter so many destines..."
"Indeed it may, brother," the female said. "But it will also insure that one day, we are not casualties of Vocah. And that is our only concern, for the moment."
"Agreed," the brother Oracle responded. "Then let us be about our business..."
---
Sunnydale High parking lot, Sunnydale, California
Friday, January 8th 1999
4:45 pm
"Oh, just leave me the hell alone!" Cordelia Chase yelled at Xander Harris. "I gave up everything for you, and you couldn't even keep it in your pants with another girl?"
"Hey!" Xander yelled back at her. "I never had sex with Willow!"
Cordelia spun on him. "Oh, right! I'm just supposed to take your word for it that you didn't sleep with that SLUT, while you spent all those research sessions alone together!"
"You two will indeed be a challenge."
Xander and Cordelia froze mid-argument. Even after their nasty breakup over a month ago, one thing stayed the same. Both hated it when someone else tried to jump into the fray, during one of their insult contests.
"And who the hell are you supposed to be?" Cordelia demanded. Seeing the way that the women was dressed in a flattering outfit, she pointed to Xander. "If you're looking for the town's resident man 'ho, then he's standing right there!"
"Hey!" Xander yelled.
Artemis held up the large wooden box she carried, and silently opened it.
"Wow!" Cordelia said in amazement, despite her still-angry mood. "That's one heck of a..." She didn't get any more out, because the large diamond in the center of the necklace started to glow - and sucked them both into it.
"That was almost too easy," Artemis said with a shrug, as she closed the box and vanished back into the past.
---
The Chamber of Hephaestus & Aphrodite, Mount Olympus
Over three thousand years ago
Hephaestus looked up from his sickly wife, to see her sister appear holding the box. "Were you able to succeed?"
"Of course, Hephaestus," Artemis told him, as she took out the necklace. "Be at peace. Your wife will soon be restored."
She slipped the mystical necklace around her sister's neck. And when the female deity did so, the large diamond containing the souls of the two fighting teenagers glowed a light red. "Ah, good. Her love has spread to them already; it will not be long before they begin to heal her..."
---
Inside the mystical diamond, all thoughts of terror or hate had quickly left the non-corporeal human couple. For when the overwhelming god power of Aphrodite hit them, their base emotions took hold - and true love was born between them.
"I forgive you Xander, my love," Cordelia said, as she kissed him passionately.
"I love you, and I promise..." Xander said as they came up for air, and he removed his shirt. "I will only have eyes for you - for the rest of my pathetic-ass life..."
"I know..." Cordelia responded, as she started to remove her clothes as well.
Soon, the teen couple had their lust and passion increased in greater amounts, as the mental energy of Aphrodite washed over them. And in turn the energy of their lust, sex and love washed over the wounded goddess - restoring her strength, cleansing her chakra and healing her mystical body.
---
Sunnydale High Library, Sunnydale, California
Friday, January 8th 1999
4:52 pm
Buffy looked at her Watcher, shocked, after he finished the tale regarding the Necklace. "This god's sister sucked a couple of human beings into that thing, to serve as some kinda sex battery?"
"Essentially, yes," Giles responded.
"That sounds awful!" Willow said, upset at the mere thought. "That's like, like a vampire draining the blood from a person! To just suck them dry..."
Giles held up his hand to stop her. "According to the legend, the mortal couple did not even notice the passage of time. For them, it would have seemed like a day or less of sheer pleasure - not pain."
"How long did this chick need that grody love necklace, anyway?" Buffy demanded.
"It varies according to the individual," Giles admitted. "However, m-most accounts say that Aphrodite kept it well beyond the time it took to heal her. Around say, ah, 300 years."
"Three hundred..." Buffy asked, shocked - and not being able to believe it. "You're saying that that couple was in her necklace, and were constantly boinking their brains out - for 300 years?"
"Well, no-" Giles started.
"Thank God!" Buffy said.
"It has been said," Giles finished. "That she gave the necklace to a mortal daughter of one of her high priestesses. Then it was passed down through the women of her temple, for over a thousand years. Before it was lost..."
Giles decided to add some stuff, since the looks on his students' faces were not of the good. "And as I said before, it wouldn't have been more than a day or two for the man and woman in question. If they ever existed, in fact, which is quite a bone of contention in certain circles. Still - the point is that the gods needed their love, and killing them wouldn't have brought about any of that emotion at all."
"So, whatever happened after the couple was released?" Willow wondered.
"I'm honestly not sure," Giles said with a shrug, never having been all that interested in that part of it. "Some say they were so full of love after realizing what had happened, that they never doubted each other again. And that they went on to live full and happy lives, with many children. Uh, I-I-I think some families in that part of the world claim to be their descendants? Again, that is if they ever existed-"
RING, RING
"I'll get it," Willow said, as she got up and went to the counter to pick up the phone. "Hello?"
#We have a ship to shore telephone message from one 'Xander Harris', do you wish to accept the reversed charges?#
"Xander?" Willow asked, not understanding. "Well, I - yeah...yes, I accept..."
#One moment, please,# the operator's voice said, before Xander Harris came on the line. #Hey, Willow!#
"Xander!" she yelled, causing the other two in the room to come over.
"Wil?" Buffy asked.
"Alexander Harris," Willow said, in a voice normally reserved for wayward children. "Where the hell are you?"
---
The luxury yacht "Atlantis IV"
Forty miles off the coast of Greece
Xander Harris grinned, as he held the phone back at Willow's predictable screech. "Calm down, Wil!" Xander said, as he watched Cordelia stretch in her new black bikini on the deck as she suntanned.
#Calm down?# Willow demanded. #The operator said you were on a ship somewhere! Where are you?#
"Ah, well, exactly? Somewhere in the Mediterranean sea," Harris said, and then flinched as a new yell came.
#WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, ALL THE WAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD?#
"I'm on my honeymoon, actually..." Xander said happily.
#HONEYMOON!# the redhead yelled, in a louder voice than Xander had ever thought possible.
"Yeah, see, I just thought I'd give you guys a quick ring and tell you we'll be back, before Buffy's birthday rolls around," he told her. "And if Snyder makes any trouble, tell him we'll explain everything when we get home."
#We?#
"Yeah, me and my wife," Xander told her, very happy. "Sorry you guys couldn't be there for it, but I married Cordelia on the island of Santorini two days ago..."
He was expecting another yell, and one came - but not from Willow. It was Buffy. #Xander! What the hell is going on! Willow just fainted! And what's this about a honeymoon?#
"Long story short, Buff," he filled her in. "Cordy and I tied the knot in Greece a few days ago."
#But that's impossible, Xander!# Buffy said in shock - and horror.
"Why?" Harris asked in perplexity. "Cordy turned 18 two days ago, and my 18th birthday was last week, so I promise you - it's all perfectly legal..."
#No! I meant - I just talked to you here, in the library, last night! So how can you guys have been in another country two days ago?#
"Yeah, I know Buffy, but the thing is-" Harris started to say, but stopped when he saw Cordelia motioning to him. "Sorry Buff, but the wife is calling. I've got to go-" Xander hung up the phone, ignoring her shrill yell in response to that.
He walked out on deck, as his new bride rearranged her towel. "So, honey? How'd they take the news?" Cordelia asked.
"Just like you thought, sweetheart," Xander told her with a sigh. "Willow fainted."
That brought a tiny smile to his wife's lips. "Exactly like Daddy did! Huh..."
Mrs. Harris then reached back and unclipped her bikini top. But despite her magnificent chest the ship's crew hardly noticed, since they were very used to women stripping topless to tan in this business. "Could you please, baby?" Cordy asked, as she handed him the tanning oil.
"Of course," Xander responded. He waited for her to lay back on the large beach towel, before he slowly and lovingly started to rub the oil onto her back.
The day passed quickly, as the ship went around in circles - more or less. But then the passengers on this sort of trip never seemed to care, as the newlywed couples definitely had other things on their minds.
And from what the grizzled old captain could see, this particular couple was no different to any of the rest of them...
---
Later that evening
The new Mr. and Mrs. Harris stood on deck at the rear of the yacht, close to the railing and watching the stars. It was the perfect night for it, too, despite it being in the middle of winter here. "What are you thinking?" Xander asked, as he held his beloved tightly.
Cordelia smirked. "That we have school on Monday, and yet neither of us will get a tardy slip or a red mark on our permanent records."
"Well, it is nice to have friends in high places sometimes..." Xander said, before he kissed his woman. Long, slow and lovingly; knowing exactly what she liked, after two days or 300 years together.
"But still, Xander," Cordelia had to say, as oxygen became an issue. "What with everything the Oracles told us...aren't you the least bit concerned?"
"Nope," her husband reassured her. "I mean, so what if your parents have been cheating on their taxes for the last 12 years? You're a legal adult as of two days ago, so the IRS can't touch a thing in the Swiss bank account that's now in your name. And what with everything we got from the temple, before we leaked out the news of its discovery...you won't ever have to worry about money again!"
"I hope so," Cordy mused. "Because I know it's pretty shallow of me...but I don't think I'm cut out to ever live poor, that way."
"You could if you had to," Xander said reassuringly. "I know you, my love. And there's nothing you can't do, if you ever put your mind to it!"
They smooched again, before Cordy leaned her back against Xander's chest as his arms quickly enfolded her. She asked softly, "So, Mr. Harris...any plans for after we graduate high school?"
"Well, Mrs. Harris," he replied with a grin, "I was thinking of asking you to stay with me, for the rest of your life; but that's pretty much already on the cards. So I was thinking, I'd get some sorta job after we graduate; love, honor and cherish you always; and help you raise all the rug rats you wanna have with me..."
Cordelia stiffened, and Xander instantly felt it. "What is it, Cor?"
The young woman prepared herself for saying something that she didn't exactly want to admit. She then turned around and said, "Xander...I don't want to raise our children in Sunnydale. For obvious reasons..."
The married couple looked into each other's eyes, and Xander knew exactly what it was that she wasn't saying. He thought about it and eventually said with a twinge of regret, "Then when the time comes...we'll raise them wherever the hell you want."
Cordy stared at him in momentary surprise, before a look of ecstasy hit her face.
Because for the first time EVER...her husband had put her wishes ahead of his. Or Buffy's, or Willow's.
Cordelia Harris instantly dragged Xander back to their bedroom in the honeymoon suite...and quickly shut the door behind them, as the two young people began a very long and wonderful life together.
The End