Disclaimer: I don't own Severus Snape or any other characters from the Harry Potter universe. They all belong to JK Rowling. I'm not making any money off this story, just weaving my own tale for one of her brilliant characters. The only person I own is Amelie.

A/N: Definite HBP spoilers towards the end of this chapter!



Chapter Two



Allowing his impregnable guard to fall, Severus relented and felt hot tears stinging his face as he said, "Yes, alright, I loved her. Big deal."

"It is a big deal," Amelie whispered.

Severus held his head in his left hand and murmured, "She was everything to me. The only thing that made life in that hell hole worth living. She was so kind, so beautiful…so perfect." He could feel his tears dripping off his chin and running into his mouth. "And then my pride got in the way. As did Potter and Black. I never, ever did anything to them. All that was wrong with me, in their opinion, was that I existed. That somehow they were better than me."

"Everyone has their own talents," Amelie shrugged, and pushed the still steaming mug of cocoa closer to the young man.

"And theirs was making life hell for the rest of us," Snape said bitterly. "And the damn werewolf…"

"Ah, yes, Remus." She smiled at Snape's look of astonishment, and said, "It was pretty obvious after a while. Anyway, continue."

He sighed. "They made a spectacle of me in front of half the school that afternoon. I was so angry with them, so fed up with their constant nagging, I lost it. I didn't even realize what I had said until James had used that Scouring charm on me…I felt…"

Felt like he should have killed himself right then and there. Why he was pouring his heart out to this woman he hardly knew was beyond him, and yet, for some reason, he felt like he could trust her. Like she had been sent there to help him past his demons.

"What? What did you feel?" she pushed.

"I felt sick for the rest of the day. She found me sulking over by the edge of the forest. Her eyes were so bloodshot she could have been bleeding out of them. She obviously knew I had been crying as well…she broke it off. Said it was getting too difficult to feign hating me when she was around Potter and his friends…" his voice cracked and he wished that the shadows would swallow him whole.

He felt her warm hand rubbing his arm through the black fabric of his cloak and robes, and found himself feeling rather hot. He struggled for a moment and peeled his cloak off, placing it in a heap on the seat next to him. Amelie replaced her hand on his arm and smiled at him.

"I was the only one she ever told," she whispered. "She knew she couldn't tell any of her Gryffindor friends, because they would loyally report it to James or Sirius, or Remus even. She made me swear not to tell anyone…like I was going to."

Snape pulled a white handkerchief out of his pocket and wiped his nose, still sniffling. "What did she tell you?" he asked.

"That your bitter exterior was only a shield to all the taunts that the Marauders threw at you," she replied sweetly. "Granted, I was still a bit wary at first…you being a Slytherin and knowing so much about the Dark Arts…" Severus grinned at this comment. "But she would always come back with some remark about how kind you were to her, and how intelligent you were…naturally I trusted her judgment."

They sat in silence for a moment, each of them sipping intently at their cocoa and watching the shadows from the fire dance across the walls.

"I didn't think she would ever date someone who was evil," she said in a hushed voice.

Snape nodded his head in agreement. "Some in Slytherin were – still are – pure evil. I can safely say that I wasn't born to be one of those people."

"You think people are born evil?" Amelie asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"But of course; how can you explain someone as terrifying and powerful as Lord Voldemort?" he answered; she did not wince at the name. "How can you believe that someone like that wasn't born with all that hate…all that prejudice flowing through their veins?"

"Nobody is born evil, Severus!" she exclaimed. "It's a corruption of the soul, evil is. I believe everyone is born pure, and their experiences in life and the people they encounter are the reasons for the corruptions."

"You're very naïve," Snape whispered. "There is no happy medium, where you're free to choose what you can become. You're born with a destiny, you're born without that power to choose."

"I would say you're the naïve one, Severus. There's always been that happy medium, and always will be!" Amelie stared at him, incredulous. "I see you sitting there, drenched in shadow, haunted by memories of people that saw you for nothing more than a fleck of lint on their robes. And I feel all the hate in you, quietly waiting for the time when you choose to let it out and give in to evil." Her gaze was piercing.

This is insane, Snape thought as he again tore his eyes away from her to stare down at the floor. Nobody had ever taken such an interest in him before, and now, tonight of all nights, a person he didn't even know decided to point out each and every one of his flaws. As if he didn't know them by heart already.

"Am I right?" she asked.

Snape blinked and muttered something indiscernible.

"Sorry?"

"Yes!" he hissed through a veil of stringy black hair.

"Severus," she cooed, moving her chair so she was next to him instead of across from him. "Severus, look at me." He refused to budge; next he knew, he felt her long, tapering fingers lightly grasp his chin and pull his face back up. Her smile was full of compassion, something he rarely felt or received. "Life is not drawn in black and white. There's plenty of grey in it, and it is our choices and the people we surround ourselves with that pull us into the darkness or bring us back into the light."

"Then explain Voldemort," Snape whispered. "Explain a man who tortures and kills Muggles for sport; tell me how he wasn't born that way."

"He too was born into the happy medium; this grey area. The people that cared for him and the decisions he made were what shaped him into who he was…who he is," she said calmly. "And as I recall, you weren't the nicest of people in school, either."

Snape rolled his eyes and sighed. "I may have been an ass to people at Hogwarts, yes, but that was because I couldn't trust anyone! They were all so stuck up, so arrogant. Even most of the Slytherins had empty pride," he explained.

"You see! You were molded into who you are now because of the people around you! Cold and impersonal because of the Marauders, proud because of your talent…" her voice faded as Snape continued.

"It's not like you can rely on anyone else in the world anyway! If your argument is true, then everyone is corrupt in some way or another; nobody is that pure. You have yourself and nobody else to depend on," he ranted.

She stared at him, golden eyes wide. "That's a very dismal perspective on life," she said in a hushed voice. "Can you not see the beauty in it at all?"

"Where is this beauty you speak of? I see no proof of its existence!" Snape exclaimed, throwing his hands up.

Amelie shook her head and smiled. "But you do, Severus. You find beauty in the potions you brew, and you find it in the spells you work. You see it in the shadows that you lurk in and in the dungeons you called your home." Her voice sounded almost melodic as she spoke the words.

Snape blinked at her, his face blank and his mind working in overdrive. This woman…this woman was speaking the honest truth about him; honest truths that even he had never been sure of.

"Why do you feel the need to isolate yourself?" she asked quietly, her hand still resting gently on his arm.

"I told you! One can only rely on oneself; you cannot trust anyone anymore," he answered, annoyance lacing his words.

"And yet you seem to have no difficulty trusting me."

Snape felt himself blush. "Yes…well…" The truth was, he couldn't explain why he trusted her at all.

Amelie smirked, triumphant. "As I remember, you were one for the Dark Arts. Always buried in a book no doubt taken from the Slytherin common room. You knew more curses as a first year than anyone I know," she said nonchalantly.

"Your point?" Snape bit.

"It's very impressive," she said with a charming air.

Snape was sure he had just melted into the seat he was in. A compliment about his talent for the Dark Arts? He had never received one from someone like her until tonight.

"Well, I did create a few handy spells when I wasn't being heckled by those insufferable Gryffindors," he said in a rather haughty tone. "The one they used to flip me over? Mine, as I'm sure countless others they used to impress other Gryffindors were. Funny how none of them wanted to challenge me one on one, isn't it? They were probably too worried I would curse them straight to hell."

He laughed at the thought of fighting Black in a duel. It would probably be over very quickly, with him, Severus, as the victor.

"And you were probably the greatest Potions student Professor Slughorn ever had the opportunity to teach," Amelie added as she magicked a new cup of cocoa onto the table.

"Yes, if I couldn't curse them, I could poison them," Snape hissed, a devilish grin playing across his pale, youthful face. "If given the proper equipment, I could probably come up with my own, more deadly and accurate than those in possession of the Ministry."

"More potent, too," she slipped in.

Snape nodded and took another sip of his own cocoa as she beamed at him, impressed beyond words. His stomach tightened and he squirmed about in his chair; something wasn't right. She had suddenly become far too interested in his talents for anyone making innocent conversation.

Oh please, you're probably nervous because she's taking an interest in you, he thought.

But –

Don't ruin this for yourself, you git!

The uneasiness was pushed to the back of his mind, lurking in the dark recesses to spring back at him.

"Is something wrong?" she asked, concerned.

"No, nothing. Why?"

"You just looked…oh, never mind." She sighed and looked out the window; the snow continued to fall outside, even heavier than before. She turned and looked back at him with a playful smile on her face. "Do you want to go for a walk?"

"It's freezing out," he whispered in response.

Amelie giggled. "And are you not a wizard?"

Snape was confused. "Yes…but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Oh, come on," the young woman sighed, taking his hand gently in hers. "You have your Apparition license, right?" He nodded and quickly pulled his black traveling cloak back over his shoulders. "Right, well, Apparate to St. James' Park." And with that, she was gone.

You really don't have to follow her, you know, a little voice said. You could just go up to your room, crawl in bed, and sleep. You really could.

He sighed and shook his head. I know. But something is telling me to. He closed his eyes and focused on the park, anywhere in the park, and stepped into uncomfortable nothingness.