Staring at the Sun
Integra gets caught up in a memory from the past that helped define who she is today. One shot. No romantic pairing, yet.
Rating: K+
Origional A/N: This is my first fanfiction, so please Read and Reveiw!
I tried to keep Integra as in character as possible, and I'd appreciate feedback on how I did. This is a one-shot for the moment, but I'm working on a second chapter from Alucard's POV. If you all like this one, I'll put it up... heck, I'll put it up even if you don't. : )
New A/N: This is actually my favorite of everyting I've written. Gasp However, no one was seeing it, so I decided it would fare better in the Collection. Maybe. We'll see. In any case, Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing or any of the characters therein. It goes without saying I wish I did. hence, my writings are FANFiction.
Smoke swirled in the soft darkness of the office. So sweet. The papers that were usually stacked neatly on the right-hand side of her desk had all been transferred to the left, signaling to Walter that they were done. The Lord and Master of Hellsing pressed the 'off' button on her computer with the gentle touch of a gloved finger. She raised her other hand to steady the cigar in her mouth as she took another long drag. My only vice… or so he tells me. A smirk graced her lips as the thought of her vampiric pet, fairly growling as she blew the smoke in his face, flashed through her mind. Not only was tobacco her refuge, but the look on his face only added to the pleasure. If only he knew.
The smirk lingered as she put it out, lazily smashing it onto the tray. She tossed the cigar in the garbage, and leaned back into her chair. The clock on her computer had read Six-thirty A.M. In her opinion, it was the perfect time of morning. Walter did not come into her room until about seven, and Alucard retired long before five. These were her hours. Her reward. True, she enjoyed Walter's careful parental concern, and Alucard's incessant baiting kept her on her toes. Alucard's own little pet, Seras, was too afraid of Integra to speak to her, much less come into her office.
Peace. I can be a glutton for it.
Integra simply sat in her chair, breathing in the smell of the morning she had come to anticipate. How lovely… It was early, however, and Integra could not remember the last time she had closed her eyes in sleep. Whenever it was, it was too long ago. As she scooted her chair out, and prepared to stand, the morning light fell on her hand, and she stopped dead in her tracks.
It was golden. Integra had always imagined that Angels had hair that color…
It sent her into thoughts of long ago.
She opened her eyes, and the canopy of her bed filled her vision. She sat up, still shaking from the nightmares. She hugged her knees to herself, trying to reassure her own soul. The specters of her dying father and a power-crazed man were gone now. They couldn't hurt her. She was safe.
Her hands traveled to her face, and she wiped the tears from it. No need to cry.
She groped around her nightstand until her fingers wrapped around her glasses. She placed them on her nose, and frowned. Dirty again. The spots obstructed her vision, constant annoyances. She climbed out of bed, and found her cleaning-cloth, polishing them single-mindedly. Her father had always said- Her father…
She shook those thoughts out of her head.
She wondered what time is was, and the clock answered her. It was 6:34. Funny, after all these years, she still remembered the exact number. Integra left her room, hoping to maybe find Walter. Alucard wouldn't be up… Not until that night. Then he'd come to tease her again. She sighed, and screwed her 13 year-old face into a grimace. He could be nice sometimes, though. Like the time he'd told her that her icy blue eyes were beautiful. She frowned as she recalled the rest. Then he'd stolen her glasses and hid them in order to "Get a better look at them." That jerk. She wandered down the halls, aimlessly, almost.
She turned a corner, and there it was- the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.
The square of light on the wall was not the pale yellow she was expecting, but a deep gold. It called to her in its innocence, asking her to touch it. She did. The wall beneath was still cold from the night's chill. The rich radiance had no time to warm it yet. Integra put one hand in the light, smiling at the way it framed her delicate fingers, then added her other. Her face lit into a huge grin, and she pressed her cheek to the chilled plaster.
The joy in her heart seemed to overflow, and she closed her eyes and rolled against the wall, so her back was to it, and her hands slid down to her sides. She opened her eyes, and met the glow of the sun with her stare.
Ice on fire.
Alucard had offered her eternal life once, but she guessed he was kidding. She'd say no anyway. She knew that, right as she stood there glaring defiantly at the sun. She could not compromise her duty to her family, or to the Queen she barely knew.
But most of all, she could never stop staring at the sun.
She forgot all about the nightmares that plagued her, and simply thought of nothing but the glow, and a little bit of sorrow. For the child who ruled the monster felt pity for him, and wished he could stand here beside her, in this little square of heaven.
Integra slid her hand over the square of light lovingly, and then removed her gloves, carefully, almost as if she were removing a layer of skin.
She took off both gloves, and set them neatly aside. She spread her hands in that little patch, and her usually grim lips contorted into a smile. She then stood up, and turned to her heavily curtained window, and threw the drapes back with a violent motion. She put both bare hands on the glass, and raised her eyes to the flaming orb in the sky.
She stared at the sun, like she was born to do.
Soon, the light faded to a clean whiteness, and the moment was gone. Integra wearily sat down in her desk chair, and put her gloves back on, slowly as before. She sighed, stood up, and scooted her chair in, bidding a goodbye to the portrait of her father, which was always watching. She closed the doors to her office with a soft thud, and then all was quiet.
She slept soundly, for no nightmare would dare touch a woman with blue fire in her eyes.
Deep in the darkness, below the foundations of the house, twin crimson orbs closed. My Master.