Hi, my name is Agent M. You may know me from Fire and Ice Equals Slush's story "Don't Touch My Popcorn." If you don't, I am a secret agent/fanfiction writer/titan kidnapper/ HIVE infiltraitor/OC. That means I don't own the Teen Titans, until I get down to kidnapping them in a correct manner (much paperwork to fill out).
I broke into the academy about the same time that Cyborg did except that I carefully avoided Rob Hoegee at all costs.
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AgentM: Testing 1-2-3 Testing (clears throat) HIVE Academy – August 5 – 7:55 am. I had just broken in to the HIVE Academy by taking the guise of a milk carton and stowing away into the school. Class is about to start so I better get on with whatever I am here for. Confidential. AgentM out.
Jinx: Hey hurry up whoever you are. Bell's about to ring.
AgentM: Yeah, I'll be right there!
Jinx: Brother Blood told me to come and take you to his office before school started.
AgentM: Sure! I'll just follow you then…
Jinx: 'kay. It's this way (both walk to Bro Blood's office)
Bro Blood: Hello, you must be the new student. I am the headmaster. My name is Brother Blood.
AgentM: Well, my name is really Sister Sweat but you don't see me advertising…
Bro Blood: (clears throat) Well, then. I called you here because I wanted to know more about you. What school did you transfer from again?
AgentM: The WASP NEST Academy. But that's not really important. I'm just glad to be here at such a fine school with such an esteemed headmaster. (Halo ding)
Bro Blood: Might I ask, what sort of evil power do you have?
AgentM: I am a fanfiction writer, the most evil of evil villains. I hold the evil power of IMAGINATION!
Bro Blood: (clears throat again)
AgentM: Here I'll show you! (grabs a lab top and types in " …and then Beast Boy slowly came closer to Raven in her room. She stared at him. He stared at her. They were both staring at each other. Then Raven leaped onto Beast Boy. She kissed him. He kissed her. They were both… kissing each other!")
BB: (somewhere on Earth; grabs Rae and starts kissing)
Star: Oh my X'Hal! Friend BB and friend Rae are both making with the out…
Bro Blood: You are most powerful indeed.
AgentM: And most vile and evil… like all the deranged sorceresses and sorcerers who publish fanfiction to torment cartoon/anime/book/video game characters.
Bro blood: Very well, I will see you after class.
AgentM: (exits stage left)
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Everyone: (looks at AgentM)
AgentM: Yum! Sloppy Joes! Just like the ones the mad lunch lady at WN used to throw at me!
Gizmo: It's not really meat, it's barf! Or stewed pig toenails! Or the leftover stuff that Raven used to resurrect Malchior in that Spellbound episode mixed together!
AgentM: That one's especially gross!
Jinx: Yeah, I mean, that Raven girl put her hair in it. And it's purple, like she never washed it after Plasmus vomited on her!
AgentM: Yeah, well your hair is pink and defies the laws of physics!
Jinx: grrrr….
Mammoth: That new girl's right, Jinx. It's like you never combed it down after you electrocuted yourself as a child.
AgentM: She what? (snickers)
Jinx: Grrrr…Whatever. C'mon, headmaster said I had to introduce you to people (takes AgentM's hand).
AgentM: (is led to other table).
Jinx: That girl over there is the top student in the HIVE Academy.
BBee: I'm BumbleBee, nice to meet you.
Mammoth: Now, she has diseased puffballs on her head
BBee: Aw, stow it! What's your name, hon?
AgentM: I'm AgentM. I'm not an undercover secret agent/Raven fanatic writing a documentary on how easy it is to infiltrate the HIVE Academy.
BBee: Good, me neither. Except for the Raven fan part and writing a documentary thing.
PriHive: Atten-shun!
AgentM: (stands straight, a bit scared)
BBee: Take it easy, Private Hive. Home girl's new here.
PriHive: I'm Private Hive.
AgentM: I'm scared…
PriHive: That's NOT the kind of attitude needed here IN HIVE ACADEMY!
AgentM: Eeeeek! (passes out) guhg…
S-More: I'm See-More.
Jinx: (blows the sloppy joe on AgentM like Raven did to Malchior)
AgentM: (is revived) I like Smores!
S-More: No, it's See-More…
Jinx: He can see through stuff
S-More: (adjusts optic lenses)
AgentM: (punches S-More's lights out)
S-More: guhg….
Billy: Howdy, pretty lady. I'm Billy Numerous.
AgentM: okay…
Billy: Tarnation! What's ol' See-More doing all over them floors?
AgentM: (is annoyed by Billy and punches his lights out)
Mammoth: Hey, you punched See-More and Billy!
AgentM: I bet all the people who watch Teen Titans felt like it. I just happened to have the chance!
BBee: Right on, girl!
AgentM: And so ends my really crazy day infiltrating the HIVE Academy. Tomorrow, Class will be in session. Hehehe, they suspect nothing. Hehehe, suckers… This is so easy. Hehehe... AgentM out.
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R&R
Yeah if you like me, AgentM, or sugar high random crossovers, go check out "Don't Touch My Popcorn."