Chapter 10

A walk in the forest with Lupin...

"It really sucks that my broom is like totally screwed up", said Harry.

"Have some chocolate!" Lupin asked.

"What's in those chocolates? Like anti-depressants?" Harry asked.

"Who told you—I mean, Harry! Do you really think I'd drug students?" Lupin asked.

"I don't know...anyway why are we taking a walk in the forbidden forest?" Harry asked.

"It's not like students aren't allowed in the forest!" Lupin said laughing.

"Well the word 'forbidden' in forbidden forest kind of sends that message!" Harry said annoyed.

"What? Oh yes! I thought it was named that for the sake of coolness!" Lupin said.

Harry grabbed Lupin's chocolate and threw it as far into the forest as he could.

Another Hogsmeade day...

Harry tried sneakily to wear his invisibility cloak to sneak into Hogsmeade but forgets that when you walk on the snow you leave footprints (and this guy is the top of his defense against the dark art class and has defeated the most powerful dark wizard in the world once or twice?)

Suddenly Harry gets grabbed by two hippies!

"Leave me the hell alone, tree huggers!" Harry screamed.

"Harry, it's us, Fred and George!" said Fred and George.

"Oh hey...leave me alone!" Harry said, trying to punch them.

"We have a present for you; it's kind of like a payback for saving everyone from Voldemort! It's a map that tells you where all the secret passages are!" said the twins.

"Why do you really want to give me this?" Harry asked, "The Voldemort gratitude thing is too damn fake to believe!"

"Okay, well...we already know all the passages anyway and that map is actually stolen so...if it was found...better you then us, right?" they asked.

"Oh...okay", Harry said, pocketing the map in his hand, "now leave me the hell alone!"

Harry followed the passages on the map which led him to a trap door, in a cellar, on Hogsmeade. "Score!" Harry said.

At Hogsmeade...

"Ron, that's the shrieking shack! Shall we come any closer?" Hermione asked.

"No way you promiscuous slut! Back off!" Ron screamed.

"I mean near the shack!" Hermione screamed back.

"Oh right! Ha ha!" Ron laughed.

Malfoy suddenly comes with his usual follower and the random kid. Malfoy is all-black attire which adds a spooky and homosexual atmosphere to the movie.

"Mudblood and poor boy are in love....how extremely disgusting! You're poor and you're a mud blood! I shun you forever!" Malfoy joked.

Suddenly Malfoy gets snowballed by snowballs! "Hey! I'm H2O intolerant! Arghh! Let's go and get my daddy who will fight the snowballs for us!" Malfoy yelled as he ran away.

Whoa! What a cool 'action' scene! (Yes, that was a sarcastic comment!)

Harry reveals himself!

"Hey Harry that was damn cool, lets go to a pub and get wasted now!" Ron said.

The Three Broomsticks, Hogsmeade...

"That's Madame Rosemerta", said Hermione, pointing to some hooker, "Ron fancies him".

"Yeah, but I could never get her...I can't afford to waste 60 sickles...I don't even have a sickle!" said Ron.

"Hookers nowadays!" scoffed Harry, "charging too damn much!" Harry said, shaking his head disapprovingly.

Harry and co. are getting wasted when Harry suddenly heard his name! Madame Rosemerta, McGonagall and Cornelius Fudge are talking about him!

"Yeah and that Sirius Black guy betrayed Harry's parents and he's like an evil bastard!" said Fudge, "he was James Potter's best friend!"

"And Peter Pettigrew is such a hero and stuff, even though he was a sneaky suspicious loner wannabe", said Fudge.

Harry suddenly ran out, followed by Hermione and Ron.

Harry sat down on some big boulder and began laughing...no wait...crying...

"OH HARRY!" Hermione says.

"Oh my god, he was their friend! I'm going to kick that bastard's ass!" Harry yelled.

"Well he is a lot more powerful and dangerous than you...but...go Harry!" Ron cheered.

"Ron, are you encouraging Harry to fight Black, so he might die, making you my closest male friend, since my closest male friend at the moment is Harry?" asked Hermione.

"Whoa, this is such a try-hard dramatic scene!" said Ron, to himself.

"The emotion is so believable!" said Seamus, suddenly appearing out of nowhere, wiping a tear from his eye.