Full Throttle Chapter 39: Promises to Keep, a jag fanfic

A/N: Uh, okay, I know this was technically supposed to be the last chapter, but then it got too long so I had to cut it off and I was just like, "what the heck, I'll make forty chapters." So . . . um, sorry for the inconvenience, but here you are anyway!

Thanks go out to: Bite Beccy, Bail's Other Daughter, Steelo, Starryeyes10, Kitty X, martini1988, QueenOfAces, froggy0319, alix33, mjag, moonlight, nursejay80, AnMaDeRoNi, snugglebug, jaggurl, Anne, ficchic, dansingwolf, Radiorox, cbw, wishwaters, Rocket Rain, sgcgirl52, tlk29, JJScottishGirl, Blueangel, aj, French-navy girl, Marge, Jane, Tina Frank, highplainswoman, mac AND harm fan, Ali Baba, super ducky, tumblebuttons, AB, Abigiale, macandharmlover, jazzy, vhosek malacath, Britainy, MartiniMac, HighHeel Shoe Lover, Sirus 745, Fan, Pissed off Poet 1, southernqt, BrittanyLS, sugar230, K, Ilovemyselftoday, eggy weg, xobabygurlxo, Reni-Maniac, Cille, ForensicsFreak1988, HMtogether4ever, MaritzaCarmichael, Lara783, janessab, tizy, June, vrbinkaCZ, Cherise, DD2, Bekka, Lani-LoveNPain, Dessler, mommie, daisymh, Laura, confused, basketball babe8, Strawberry Kittens, rainydays502, S, Broesel, ady, Kristie, writingismything, TV Angel 711, TaTe.ArI.Obsessed.Writers, MiDushiNoSushi, Basketball Babe8, Alex, Angie, Toplesslemon, Jules, prinnie, CJKS, ninjagirl987, Brontesgirl, Jules, Angie Capriatti, lance corporal boils, freezepops, FoxyWombat, Lauren, Syraë, Acer-127, Concrete Angel, Lullaby, Fran, Judy52sa, kd, BelovedOne, fic chic, disneygirl1962, and Mackenise Jackson, for your wonderful reviews! If I left anyone out, please let me know.

Flashback to 'Frozen Fear' (Mac's POV)

"Hurry up!" I screamed hoarsely to Vera. "We've got to go!"

Vera was crying, her face screwed up in agony. "I can't do it, Mac! It hurts!"

Jake was close now, pulling me up from the ground and throwing me away. "RUN!" he screamed, pulling on Vera's arm and wrenching her up to her feet. "It's going to BLOW!"

And with that startling statement, the entire opera house blew as chunks of stone and rock and wood crashed down above us from the air, as Ballando il Teatro dell'Opera Leggero was no more.

Promises to Keep

1042

What used to be the theater

Clay's POV

"Jake! Vera!"

I'm screaming hoarsely, detachedly, and I'm running, my legs a blur of motion. Somewhere in the back of my mind I register the fact that I can barely breathe, that my body is racked with pain I can only compare to that which I experienced in Paraguay. But I ignore it. My mind's going a mile a minute as I race through the ruins, my scratched voice screaming their names. Please god, let them have lived . . .

Lights are blazing, sirens are wailing, explosions attract a lot of attention. Through my blurred vision I can see Harm's unconscious form on one of the stretcher, and Mac who suffered nothing but a light scrape to the forehead trying to get through to the Italian police what happened. But it's useless, and we both knew it. Abbas was gone again. The air was layered heavily in the smell of burning wood and concrete, it was stifling. Thick grey smoke obscured my vision as I smashed my way through the debris, my body aching for me to stop, but my mind refusing to do so.

"Jake!" I screamed shrilly, pushing myself under the broken beams. "Vera!"

From behind me one of the police officers screamed, "Uscire da lí!"

I didn't need to be Italian to know what that meant. Get out of there. The debris was unsafe. At any moment piles of concrete or wood or metal could come crashing down from what used to be the roof. But I don't care, I thought savagely as I ploughed through anyway. Not without Vera and Jake . . .

"Holter!" I called out to the open air, my body lost within the smoke. "Azhad!" I felt a nervous sob shake my body as I imagined their bodies lying buried beneath the rubble. Don't think about that! I mentally screamed. Don't think about their voices dampened by the debris. Don't think about their bodies crushed by the planks of the roof. Don't think about . . .

A groan. Quiet, barely audible, but there it was. A groan. I pushed myself through the rock, my heart pounding madly within my chest. I felt a distant rush in my ears, but I was too dizzy to think much of it. I could just see Vera's and Jake's faces loom in front of my mind, and I kept driving through, my hands plowing madly. "Vera! Jake!"

I heaved a breath, my chest aching. I rotated my head in every which way. My vision was obscured, the smoke was stifling. I felt lost. My legs were shaky, threatening to give in at any moment. My back hurt, and my skin was scraped. Collapsing looked so good right about now . . .

"Clay!"

The cry was distant, so far and so quiet I barely heard it against the pounding that resounded within my own ears. But it was enough to get me going. I sprinted in the direction of the voice, my skin stinging against my own flesh. The smell of heating metal filled my nostrils and throat. And then I saw them, caught under wooden roof beams, sheets of metal pinning them under. Jake was on top of Vera, his arms outstretched so as not to put his weight on her. Both where ghostly pale.

I ran over to them, my legs suddenly feeling like jelly that could no longer hold itself up. I collapsed beside them. "Vera . . . Jake . . . are you okay?" I gasped in between my ragged breaths.

Jake couldn't speak a word. His lips were white and his skin paler, but Vera cried, "Help!"

I stood up from my crouched position, my eyes scanning the ruins frantically for the police officers. "I've got two!" I cried shrilly, pointing down at the ground though I knew they couldn't see Jake and Vera from where they were standing. "I need help!"

I turned back to Vera and Jake, whose color was rapidly decreasing. "Vera, come up," I said, putting my arms around her shoulders and attempting to drag her out from under Jake to relieve the pressure on his front body but she screamed in pain as soon as I did so. Her hands clutched her stomach.

"Sorry, Vera, but I've got to get you out," I panted as I pulled her once more, her anguished screams echoing in my ears. "You're hurting Jake!"

That was more or less of an understatement. Jake had stopped moving, his head lolled to the side, his skin snow white, his dark golden hair standing out vibrantly against it. He could barely keep his eyes open. Vera cast a panicked look at Jake, her face stricken, and then she grabbed hold of me and helped me heave her out. She bit her lip to keep herself from screaming.

"Come on, Vera, we're almost there!" I muttered, pulling as I slid her waist out, her legs still remaining trapped under Jake's body. "Just one more pull, okay?"

Vera shook her head, her whole body shaking as she cried. "I can't do it, Clay, I can't . . ."

"You've got to!" I bit back forcefully, pulling on her legs. "Come on, Vera, work with me!"

She cast me a frightened look but wrapped her arms around my neck and pulling hard so that both her legs slid out from underneath Jake. I watched as his body shifted, the planks falling lower on him, but less painfully. I trained my vision on Vera who now lay limply by my side, unmoving.

"Oh, Vera," I whispered hoarsely, putting my ear to her chest and sighing in relief as I heard the slow but steady beat of her heart. Putting one arm underneath her back and the other around her waist, with a sudden burst of unexpected strength I hauled Vera up, slinging her body deftly into my arms. "I'll be right back, Jake," I whispered. "Okay?"

Very dimly I could see him nod his head, pain seeping its way into his features. I pushed Vera farther up into my arms so as not to drop her, and raced as fast as I could up to the cop cars. Ducking my way under broken planks and the slabs of concrete, I pulled my way over to where the cops and the ambulances were parked. They'd already taken Harm and Mac away. I could feel myself grow faint as I approached them, Vera weighing heavily on my arms, but I pushed the fatigue away. Save Jake . . . save Jake . . .

The cop closest to me rattled off in long fluid Italian which I understood none of. I gently but swiftly lay Vera down on the stretcher, pushing back my hair as I moved to run back into the debris. I can feel pain nagging at my heart but I forcefully ignore it. Keep moving, I tell myself wearily. Just keep moving.

I'm hollered at forcefully by the cops as I try and go back in. I know they don't want me to go back, the left side of the opera house is crumbling and chunks of cement are tumbling everywhere. But I also know I don't give a care in hell what they think. Just keep low and work your way through. Smoke stings my eyes but I refuse to shut them for even a moment. I need to find Jake, we need to get out of here.

In that moment I'm caught thinking about Harm and Mac, how much I've ruined their lives. Who knows, maybe even before Abbas, if I'd stepped aside everything could have worked out. If I hadn't taken Mac to Paraguay, maybe they'd have had Hunter a long time ago, they'd be settling down into some nice, large, white-picket fence right now, dreaming of coming to Italy only for vacation. Or at least, they'd still be safe, back at JAG where they refuse to acknowledge their feelings for each other.

And then Vera, she'd never be here if I hadn't asked her in. Or Jake, who only joined due to the fact he was on vacation in Italy and happened to run into Vera. For if Vera was never there, neither would Jake be, and none of us would be in this mess, because if I hadn't taken Mac to Paraguay, Harm would have never needed to resign his commission, and then he would have never entered the CIA – where we all know Harm doesn't belong. And if he hadn't ever been in the CIA, he wouldn't have had to go to Manila, where who he met there wouldn't have hired Abbas to kill Harm – to kill all of us, which would have never prompted me to call Vera as security, to have Jake accidentally meet her, or to have Mac follow Harm. If only . . .

"Clay," Jake wheezed as I reached him, his dark blonde hair falling in front of his misty hazel eyes as he struggled underneath the wooden plank. I fell to my knees, pulling close to him.

"Save your breath," I whispered hoarsely, drawing my arms to the planks and pushing up with all my might. "You'll need all the energy you can get."

Jake shook his head violently. "No, Clay, you don't understand . . ." he trailed, his words dying on his lips as his face contorted in pain. And then I saw it, the blood. It trickled slowly but surely out from behind his head. I looked at him, seeing no exterior mark on his head or around his face.

"Jake . . ?" I trailed, shoving the plank up, and then I saw it. One of the metal roof beams had sunk through Jake's chest on the right side, not through the middle, but clipping his side and puncturing what I could imagine to be several internal organs. And the farther I pushed the plank up, the more blood I discovered. "Jake, you're bleeding!" I exclaimed, suddenly standing up. "Someone, I need help over here!"

"You shut up," Jake said tersely, bending over as I tried to remove the metal pole but only managing to push it farther into his chest. I let go as though my hands were burned. "Clay," he whispered softly, his head coming to rest on my lap as I shifted in closer to him, trying desperately to lift some of the roofing off of him. More rubble from the left side of the Opera House was coming crashing down. Soon the whole wall would collapse. "You gotta get outta here," Jake said, his eyes shutting for a moment.

"I'm not leaving you," I said passionately, my arms flailing madly in front of me as it hit stone and metal and concrete leaving my hands throbbing in pain. "Just hold on."

"No, stop," Jake commanded, seizing one of my hands in his and holding it so I couldn't move. "You listen to me now. This is gonna be the last thing that I ever tell you . . ."

"No, that isn't true!" I said, shaking my head in cold defiance. I could feel my body shaking, racked with sobs. No, he can't die . . . Jake can't die . . . Jake's got too powerful a spirit to die. "You're gonna make it, buddy! We'll get you to the hospital and they'll patch you up okay."

Jake shook his head. "No, they won't, Clay. You and me both know that." A large square of cement came falling down from the top and I had to squeeze myself close to Jake to keep myself from getting hit. "You listen, Clay, listen real good." I was all ears. "You've got to watch out for her, okay?" he asked, and it took me a minute to realize he was crying too. "Look out for Vera, take care of her. She doesn't need any help, but what she does need is a real good friend."

"Jake," I whispered hollowly but Jake plowed right on.

"Harm and Mac will be okay now," he said shakily, grinning wildly for a minute there. "Now that it's over. I don't think Abbas'll be after Harm anymore . . . I don't know if he ever really was. I think Harm was close to you, and you're to Vera, so that was the plan. Nab Harm, get you and Vera. So watch your back, okay? He's already got one of us."

"He hasn't got you yet, Jake!" I interjected stubbornly, my voice hoarse. "Please hang on . . ."

"But you've got to get him, Clay," Jake whispered softly. "Not for me, though. Don't do it for me. Do it for Vera. She's suffered under Abbas longer than I have, than I will . . ." He choked. "Just get him, okay?"

I nodded, gulping. "I will."

More cement, more metal, they tumbled towards me and this time I had to throw myself away to the right hand side to keep from being hit. I grimaced as I smashed my shoulder in to the hardened brick next to me.

"Now, go, Clay!" Jake whispered forcefully. I could see the pallor overtake every inch of his face, sweat dripping down his forehead and his cheeks. Blood swam from underneath his body. "Go or you'll get hit."

I stood right where I was, shaking. My arms wrapped around him and tried to pull him out but I knew as soon as I pulled I was only hurting him more. There was no saving him . . . More chunks of the theater walls and roof rained down upon us.

"Go!" Jake screamed feebly, his head resting against the rubble beneath my feet. "Go to Vera . . ."

I could feel myself vibrating violently as I numbly clambered down from where I had been standing. More cement, or bricks, they cut through the air like missiles as I struggled to keep from being hit.

I watched as Jake took one last look up at the sky, and for one second – through the cracks of the clouds overhead – long thin rays of sunlight rained down upon his face, his eyes looking more blue than gray. And Jake smiled, the most beautiful blessed smile ever to spread across his face. "I'm coming, Jane . . ."

And then he was gone, leaving me standing all alone.

Same Time

The Hospital

Mac's POV

"Is she going to live?" I burst as the doctor left Vera's room, my feet carrying me from Harm's. Harm had just woken up, and though thoroughly disoriented he was expected to make full recovery. Vera however . . .

The doctor's voice was grave, "I'll be frank, her chances aren't the best. And with all the excitement she sustained today, she's gone into labor."

I could feel my face pale. Take it from someone who's been down that road. It's painful even before you have a whole Opera House roof collapse on you. I could feel my heart pounding loudly within my chest. "How . . . when . . ." I struggle with my words.

The doctor looks at me sympathetically, nodding as though he knew exactly how I felt. "I'll let you know if anything else crops up."

I nodded dumbly.

"But," he whispered tenderly. "I do need to know that if it comes down to saving the baby or the mother, which one to choose."

I was at a loss for words. It had never struck me how serious the situation was before he said that. One or the other. "I can't make that decision."

He nodded, "I understand. Well, hopefully it doesn't come down to that."

And I could only pray that that was the case.

Same Time

The Piazza

Clay's POV

I wandered down the road numbly, the rush not leaving my ears. My heart beat dully within my chest, pointlessly. I felt drunk though I knew I was never more sober. He was dead. Jake was dead. I couldn't believe it. I knew some part of me would never believe it. Never believe that I wouldn't wake up to his smart-aleck comments, or his needling me about my hair or lack there of. Never go on another mission with him, never have another fight with him. It was inconceivable to me.

From deep within me came a burning anger, white and hot that spread throughout my entire being. I was mad as hell. This kind of wild almost rabid look overtook my eyes and I grinned insanely as I stomped down the tiled ground of the piazza. From the horrified looks that I was receiving from tourists I could tell I looked a mess. MY shirt was ripped, my forehead violently scraped, and Jake's blood soaking through my clothes. Sweat glistened on my skin and the smell of the smoke and blood mixed nauseatingly on my body.

"Abbas."

Never had more motivation ever been uttered in a word. The glare that burned my eyes resulted in the crowd separating in front of me as though I were infected by some fatal virus. But I didn't care. In fact, I hardly noticed it. I knew where Abbas was, and it was killing me.

Abbas and Catherine, working together. The shock had still not worn off. Catherine was an idiot, never before had I been so sure of anything. She was weak, she was Abbas's target. Some other men might have felt sorry for her, but not me. She as good as killed Jake. She deserved to die more painfully than he did, in a pool of her own blood with no one to save her. And if I ever met the man that employed them, I'd kill him too.

Jake's words echoed in my mind as I sprinted across the piazza and ducked into a connecting alley. They replayed in my mind so forcefully, I don't believe I shall ever forget them. They stung with painful truth. And it scared me.

I bit my lower lip hard, running faster. Out of all of us, Jake didn't deserve to die. He never got his shot at happiness, or a family, or anything like that. He was cheated out of life. Abandoned by his mother, his father jailed when he was eight, and leaving Jake to take care of his younger brother by five years. The only thing Jake had ever done for himself was join the CIA, and look where that had gotten him.

"I will," I could feel my voice tremble as I said so as I ran down the street, not pausing for a moment to catch the breath that I had little of. "I will."

I staggered into the alley next to the Hotel Riz. If Catherine and Abbas were working together, Catherine would settle for no less than the most expensive hotel in the country, and where there was Catherine, there would be Abbas. I shook with anger as I felt my fingers curl around my belted gun. I would get him this time. There would be no pausing for the extraction of information, or Arnold Schwarzenegger-like lines. I would shoot him and I would watch him die. For what he'd done to Harm and to Mac, to Vera, and – I gulped – to Jake.

I could feel myself freeze over as a sudden realization hit me. My senses went haywire. A stifling stench drowned the alley, and I knew what it was the moment I inhaled it. Blood, freshly spilled blood. I felt nauseous. I staggered forward, my eyes scanning the bare ground, sandwiched between the two brick walls. And then I saw it, or rather her.

Catherine Gayle lay there against the wall, her body slumped in a twisted position, and blood flowing freely from the large bullet hole in her forehead. I felt my stomach flip as I saw her and I didn't wonder once who killed her. Abbas. She was done, used, she had served her purpose, so he killed her. Mercilessly she was murdered, just like Vera's father, just like Jake . . . but no more. I could feel angry tears sting my eyes and I looked away, struggling with nausea. He wouldn't kill again.

A rustling noise. I whirled around, my gun immediately outstretching in front of me. My heart thumped madly within my chest. A buzzing noise overtook my ears. I stiffened. And then I saw him, Abbas, walking towards me as if he knew, he knew what I was hear to do . . . and he was smiling. The son of a bitch was smiling. He had just killed two people and he was grinning like a kid on Christmas morning. My blood began to boil.

"Clayton Webb," he hissed, his dark eyes taking in my bloody and bruised form. "Why, I was hoping you'd be dead by now."

"Sorry to disappoint," I spat, my finger clenched on the trigger. Abbas didn't so much as blink. He merely stared at me with calm and rational eyes, taking in the barrel of the revolver. He twitched slightly.

"So are you here to kill me?"

It seemed so simple when he stated it. One pull of the trigger, that was all it would take. Abbas would be no more. My jaw clenched as I put the slightest pressure on my trigger finger, but there was something about the way Abbas stood, the way his eyes moved, and I knew that this was what he wanted me to do. To kill him. And I wasn't about to play into his hands again.

"Why?" I asked, my voice shaking. "Why'd you kill him?"

Abbas was calm. "Kill who?"

"Jake!" I exclaimed savagely, pushing my revolver up against his forehead. And for a minute, I swore I saw fear flash in his eyes, almost immediately replaced by the darkness of control.

"Holter's dead?" He seemed almost amused by the idea. "Funny, I would have thought out of the lot of you, he would be the one to live."

My voice trembled. "He SHOULD have been the one to live."

Abbas stared at me in the perceptive way he did. "So that's why you're here is it, to avenge his death?" Abbas smiled. "You know, Webb, you and me are a lot alike. We're obsessed with our jobs, we're defiant to our employers, and the one thing that we love the most in the world, we'll never rest until we get it."

I shook. "And what's that?"

His dark eyes sunk into mine. "Power."

I shook my head violently. "You know, Abbas, if you had said that a year ago, maybe even a month ago I would have disagreed with you. That there are millions of differences between us." Abbas looked confused for a second. "But I'm smarter now, and there's really only one difference between the two of us." My gun pressed up against his temple, his eyes widened. "You would pull the trigger." And then I snapped back, the gun hitting hard on his head and I watched as his body slumped to the ground.

A/N: Okay, I know I said this would be the last chapter - but hey, next chapter would make it forty! How wicked would that be if I finished at the big four 0? Oh yeah, and as mentioned in the last chapter, this would be a REALLY good time to review.

Disneygirl1962: Well, I'm glad you're liking Full Throttle - one chapter to go!

Starryeyes10: thanks!

FoxyWombat: lol, I can't believe YOU'RE yelling at ME for evil cliffies! Never mind the Queen of Confliction, you're the Queen of Cliffhangers.

Snugglebug: lol, (we all pull out matching 'I HEART cliffhangers t-shirt') well, this chapter wasn't too cliffy . . .

Brontesgirl: thanks, and don't worry - I'm coming up with the sequel.

Daisymh: thanks, and I hope you liked this chapter too.

Abigaile: Yeah, one more chapter and then the sequel . . . and I hope you're not too distraught.

Southernqt: soooo is this what you thought would happen? Well, it's not over yet.

Vhosek malacath: well, I hope I don't abuse that trust with the last chapter (would have ended it with this one except it was going too long)

Sarah: thanks! Not too much cliffie stuff here . . . but just wait till you all find out who employed Abbas.

Mackenise Jackson: YOU READ IT IN A NIGHT AND A MORNING! Wow, I'm impressed . . . this story's pretty long.

Jaggurl: I know, I'm sad too! But that's what sequels are for!

Alix33: lol, yeah . . . Dumbledore drinking it was so sad! I was like, 'Nooooooooo!' (As my friend Steelo (sitting right next to me) just narrated). Ah, one chapter to go!

Radiorox: yeah, lol, where would they all be without Mac?

Lani: Breathe in . . . and out . . . in . . . and out . . . feeling better?

Pissed Off Poet 1: I took the 'don't kill anyone' thing into consideration and then I was like 'ahhhh, necessary for the sequel' and then I was like, 'but Pissed Off Poet will kill me'. And then I thanked the lord that the internet's the only way we communicate. Lol

MiDushiNoSushi: Well, you certainly had a lot of questions - and I answered NEARLY all of them. LOL, we'll just wait to see how this wraps up, huh?

Freezepops: ah, I was SO going to make this the last chapter and then it got WAY too long! And I was like, should I prolong it . . . or rap it up with this chapter . . .? And then I argued with myself so much my friend was just like, "Just go ahead and make it forty!" And then I gave in.

Odakota: I know, when i was writing it and I put Catherine in I was like 'everyone should know right about . . . NOW!' But I still managed to surprise some people. Just wait till you find out who's employing Abbas. That's one of the more fun details of the story.

TV Angel 711: lol, well there ya go! Catherine's dead! And more gasp worthy stuff in the next chapter . . . I think. Oh wait, yeah there is - what the hell am I saying? MORE GASP STUFF TO COME.

Kristie: There! Chapter posted! Yes, I know it wasn't the LAST chapter but would youguys rather have one more? I think you'd rather have one more . . . Besides, forty's a nice number to end at. Round and everything. LOL

Prinnie: lol, I know where you're coming from. I'll finish Full Throttle,put up another chapter of TLWL, and then just take a BREAK. Well, not really - I've got this thing that I have to right for my history exam, sooooo never resting. And I followed your rule! Harm and Mac didn't die . . .

tizy: lol, I know what you mean, I'm the same way with some stories. It's like, 'hmm . . ten chapters, maybe I'll just read one or two tonight'. And then before you know it, you're reading them all just cuz you can't stop. And at the same time you're really enjoying it but you also want to save some for tomorrow . . . lol, i'm getting carried away here!

Reni-Maniac: Alright, i'll tell you. They get Abbas and he doesn't return in the sequel. LOL

froggy0319: heh heh, one more chap coming! I know I said that last chapter . . . but this time there is DEFINITELY ONLY ONE. I mean, I thought I coudl make this like a ten page chapter, but then I reached ten pages and realized I was no where near the end, so I cut it off at six.

JamieAKAaclassyone: lol, thanks . . . yeah, i can't believe other people didn't guess Catherine as the snitch. I mean, to me she seemed perfectly obvious - the only one in the CIA that was in on the op - except for the golden trio, of course . . . just wait till you find out who's employing them. Or maybe you already know. My friend was reading it and she guessed . . .