Chapter 5 Pizza Time
If there was one common adjective to describe the mood in Titans Tower, it was gloomy. Nobody was their normal self, except for Raven, who was an extreme of herself, excluding herself more than usual. Everyone was extremely bored. The GameStation was in the repair shop (Cyborg smashed it after Robin beat his high score), the TV and DVD player had short-circuited, and nobody could go outside on account that it was raining. The Titans had convened in the living room, all except Terra, who was nowhere to be found.
Robin and Starfire lay on the couch, Starfire sleeping peacefully and Robin gently stroking her silky arm, drifting off himself. Cyborg sat in the corner, softly snoring. Usually he would recharge in his room, but it wasn't often that his human components had a natural rest. Raven floated a foot off the ground softly chanting "Azarath Metrion Zinthos, Azarath Metrion Zinthos." Normally, she would have her hood down, but her embarrassment at her bruised face caused her to hide it. Beast Boy reclined on a comfortable chair, snoring loudly and drooling. His snoring was so loud, in fact, that nobody was awakened by a loud scream of terror from the hallway.
The scream came from Terra. She was sprinting down the hallway away from a terrifying monster. I'll be safe if I make it to the living room, she thought feverishly, hurtling around the last corner before the living room. She burst in through the door, rousing everyone with a start. "Help," she yelled, rounding Beast Boy's chair. "It's going to get me!"
"What? What is it?" asked Beast Boy worriedly, but he quickly got his answer. The monster which had chased Terra stood in the doorway, surveying its surroundings. "No," said Beast Boy as his brain registered what he was seeing. And what he was seeing was horrifying.
An extra large, oozing, everything pizza stood in the doorway, leaving the Titans in a terrified silence. For a long moment, nobody dared speak. Finally, Cyborg said "Maybe it'll just go away." No sooner had the words left his mouth that the pizza somersaulted toward Terra. Terra screamed and crouched behind Beast Boy. "Dude," he shouted, leaping out of the way, "How many times do we have to throw this thing out the window?"
"No more," shouted Cyborg, "'cause the Cyborg vacuum cleaner is here!" He dove at the pizza. It tried to escape, but Cyborg trapped it, stuffed it in his mouth, and ate it in three bites.
"Mm, mm, mm. Spicy!" he bellowed, a smile of triumph on his face. The pizza, however, was not done fighting. Cyborg's face tinged green and he clapped a hand over his mouth.
"Uh oh," said Robin, sensing what was about to happen. Cyborg motored over to the window, stuck his head out, and hurled over the sill.
"I am not completely familiar with your customs here on Earth," said Starfire tentatively, "but that was simply disgusting, was it not?"
"Oh yeah," said Terra, attempting to block out the sounds of Cyborg's heaving.
"I hope I never have to see anything like that ever again," said Raven dully, walking out of the room.
"Ah, dinner." Beast Boy had just reached the kitchen for a snack. He realized that he had just eaten, but it seemed that he had some pig genes in him. "Pizza time," he said as he reached the fridge. He placed his hand on the handle and pulled. It happened so fast, Beast Boy only had time to utter a tiny yelp.
"Anyone seen BB? I have an urge to kick his ass in Stankball." Nobody had seen Beast Boy all day, which was strange. It wasn't like Beast Boy to isolate himself from the group. This made them so suspicious that they decided to conduct a tower-wide search.
"Friend Beast Boy? Friend Beast Boy!" shouted Starfire as she searched his room. She looked in every corner and even under the bed and found nothing. The same happened to Robin in the weight room, Cyborg in the living room, Raven on the roof, and Terra in the cellar. Beast Boy was nowhere to be found.
The titans reconvened in the living room. "Where is he?" asked Terra, throwing up her hands in frustration. She turned to Raven and accused, "This is all your fault, you know."
"How is this my fault?" Raven asked heatedly.
"This probably has something to do with whatever happened with you two on the roof."
"Oh, you want to talk about what happens on a roof…"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," shouted Cyborg, interrupting their quarrel, "What has you two at each others' throats?" Both Terra and Raven wheeled around and glared at Cyborg, Terra's eyes were yellow, Raven's white. Chair flew up and smashed on the ceiling. Cyborg drew back in fright.
"What's their problem?" he asked Robin.
"You know how Raven is," Robin replied, "I don't think she'll ever forgive Terra for what happened with Slade." He turned back to the arguing girls and shouted, "Hey, maybe instead of arguing, we could figure out a way to find Beast Boy before something hurts him. If it hasn't already."
These last four words got their attention. Raven and Terra didn't have much in common, but one of these things was their feelings for their missing friend.
As it turned out, shutting them up was exactly what Robin needed to do. With the room quiet, everyone could hear a soft thumping from the bathroom. "How did we not check the bathroom?" asked Robin incredulously. Nobody had a good answer for this and just stood in an embarrassed silence. As one, they all snuck toward the bathroom. Starfire placed a hand on the doorknob, slowly turned it, and flung the door open.
"OH MY GOD!" shouted Cyborg. Beast Boy was flopping around on the floor, but that wasn't what surprised Cyborg. The surprising part was the pizza on this face. An entire pie obscured his face, making him look like a headless windup toy. At Cyborg's yell, the pie turned and flipped off of Beast Boy's face. It soared through the air, smacked into a wall, and stuck there. Terra rushed over to Beast Boy and helped him up.
"Ewwww," he shouted feverishly wiping mushrooms off of his face, "that was so disgusting!"
"Beast Boy, you are unharmed?" asked Starfire with concern.
"Yeah, I'm…" Beast Boy began, but he was interrupted by the pizza. The pizza had flipped off of the wall, shot a string of cheese onto the next wall, and swung away on it. "Dude, spider pizza!" shouted Beast Boy.
"Let's go get it!" shouted Terra starting toward the spot where the pizza had disappeared. And so the Great Pizza Chase began.
Robin rounded the corner into the kitchen and skidded to a halt. He warily surveyed his surroundings, looking for any sign of the pizza. Nothing. Suddenly he felt a soft, wet something fall onto his spiky hair. He reached up, grabbed the thing, and looked at it. It was a slice of pepper. He slowly raised his eyes to the ceiling until an extra large everything pizza met them.
Before he could react, the pizza shot a string of cheese at his face. It splattered, covering his mask and vision. He tore off his mask just as the pizza swung around a corner. Spotting it, he leapt up and ran after it, pulling out his communicator as he went.
"Titans, "he yelled into the communicator, "I'm following the pizza through the foxtrot corridor. Come quickly."
"Where's that again?" asked Beast Boy, "this code thing is confusing."
"Just follow me," said the irritated, scratchy voice of Raven.
Robin rounded a corner just in time to see the pizza's crust slip through a door. He dove inside and rolled to his feet. "Boiler room," he whispered into his communicator.
He snuck through the room, stealthing around the perimeter. His eyes traveled to the door and met a round silloute. With a yell, he dove toward the doorway and tackled the form casting the silloute. It let out a loud squeal. In the lighted hallway, Robin could see what it really was. It was a green pig.
"Dude," shouted Beast Boy turning back into himself, "what was that?"
"I'm sorry," said Robin quickly, "I thought…I was trying to…why were you a pig?"
Beast Boy, who had no answer to this, was saved by the entrance of Starfire. Spotting Robin's eyes, she asked with a squeak, "Robin, what has happened to your mask?"
Robin reached up and felt bare skin where his mask should have been. "Oh, "he replied, "It got cheesed." Starfire giggled.
"Is the pizza still here?" asked Cyborg as he arrived on the scene.
"I didn't see it come outside," said Terra poking here head inside the door.
"Well let's split up and search the room," said Beast Boy decisively.
As quietly as they could, the Titans snuck around the room keeping a lookout for the pizza. For five minutes they searched, but to no avail. "I got nothing," said Cyborg as the titans reconvened by the door.
"Wait," said Starfire, "Where is Raven?"
"I don't know," said Beast Boy, "I didn't see her come in."
Just as he finished saying this, there was a muffled bang from the next hallway. The Titans rushed to the noise to find Raven face down on the floor. "Damn," said Cyborg as she began to stand, "Rae, are you o…Lord." He stopped, speechless.
"Woah," said Beast Boy, "what happened to your face?" The damage from Raven's beating was revealed to all. One eye was partially closed and surrounded in black. Her upper lip had swelled to twice the size of her lower lip and there was some crusted blood on it. A yellowing bruise stood out on her left cheek and a cut on her chin, not to mention numerous bruises on her body. Robin, Beast Boy, Cyborg, and Starfire grimaced. Terra smirked behind their backs.
"Nothing," said Raven quickly, "I…I tripped. That's right, I tripped."
Robin was about to say something, when the spider pizza flipped onto the scene. The Titans attacked, or, more accurately, Raven attacked. She raised a hand and enveloped the pizza in black energy, trapping it. "Why did we not just do that in the first place?" asked Starfire perplexedly. None of the other Titans hastened to answer.
Raven had thrown the pizza out the window again, and the Titans returned to the living room. They had just lain down to nap again when the television flickered on. "How did the TV get fixed?" asked Cyborg.
Before anyone could answer, a face appeared on the screen. "Good afternoon Titans." It was Slade. "I see you did not heed my warnings about the girl."
"What are you planning?" demanded Robin (I love clichés).
"I am planning nothing," he replied, "I am merely going to let Terra show you what a mistake you have made. I should make popcorn. This promises to be quite entertaining."
All of the Titans turned to Terra, who shrugged and frowned.