I'd like to thank all my reviewers! LOL! JK! Chapters 1 and 2 uploaded at the same time, because they just seemed to make better due in two parts. Review!

I already disclaimed. :D So don't expect it again! Luvs!

Oh, what a tangled web we weave

When we first practice to deceive!

-Sir Walter Scott

Dancing in Drag

Chapter 2: So He Wears Skirts

Imagine the safest feeling in the world, like being in the arms of someone you love, or being nestled into your warm bed at daybreak. Now multiply it by 100, and add a cherry on top.

At that moment, that would be the best way to describe the opposite of how Squall was feeling. He was beginning to wonder if Rinoa had made a pact with the devil at some point in her lifetime. Why had he ever gone through with this? Being bullied for every last moment of his future life would have been better than this.

He was sitting rather uncomfortably on their bathtub's floor, tied up and unclothed but for his favorite green boxers. When he wriggled, he fell over on his back but when he sat up again, he wriggled. And there was really nothing much besides wriggling that he could do at this point, besides bawl his eyes out, and he didn't really feel up to that.

And there was Rinoa, grinning insanely as she came near. He was afraid. And rightfully so.

"Now this isn't going to hurt a bit," she said, "but only as long as you don't move a muscle!"

He stared at her.

"What isn't going to hurt?"

"Hee hee." She turned to the medicine cabinet and pulled out a few things before returning before Squall's seated and bound body. She had his shaving cream and one of Squall's razors. His face twisted in confusion. He had just shaved that morning, and he usually only did once in a while. His facial hair was tame, thank you very much.

"I'm sorry, but do you see a beard anywhere on my face?" He asked venomously, and Rinoa giggled, shaking her head.

"You're confused, Squally. We're not here to work on your face: that's for later. Right now, we've got to fix a few other things first. We'll get some wax this weekend, but for now..."

He watched as her gaze traveled down from his face to his legs, and in that moment, he swore his heart stopped.

"WHAT!"

"Calm down!" She hushed him, and he started to struggle. She tried to stop him from his crazy struggling but when she realized it didn't work, she narrowed her eyes and pulled the shower head down, aiming it at his face.

"You're going to let me do this, or else you get the boiling hot water treatment," she hissed, knowing all too well that Squall had a strange sensitivity to it. And he stopped struggling.

"...Why?" He asked tiredly.

"What do you mean, 'why'?" She asked him. "You're not real hairy or anything, but you can't wear a skirt without being totally hairless. Oh! Right; I forgot to tell you...I threw out all your pants."

Squall wanted to cry then. He really, really did.

"Rinoa..." he whined.

"Don't whine. It doesn't suit you," She said pointedly, and proceeded to start work upon Squall's poor legs. Now his options were narrowed to just sitting there. After all, if he wriggled, he'd get a face full of scalding hot water.

-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-

"Does every girl wake up this early every day to get ready?"

"I don't know...hey, hold still..."

"I don't get why you have to go this far. I mean, some girls just wear baggy pants and sweaters, don't they?"

"No way am I letting my brother be a dork! You're going to be sexy as hell, and you're going to like it."

"...Why..."

"Because, I don't want to be the girl with the ugly sister. We're gonna be the hottest girls at school, bro!"

"That sounds so wrong," he said, burying his face in his hands.

"SQUALL! Look what you did! Now I have to start over!"

The brunette groaned and dropped his hands from his face again, glaring at his reflection. What the hell was Rinoa doing to him? His eyes were lined with black, and the way his eyes contrasted against it almost blinded him. Funny thing, that his eyes could do that but the rest of his appearance could not. It was honestly sickening, but...he had to admit, Rinoa had done a pretty good job of making him look like a girl. Maybe someday she would be a makeup artist for cross-dressers.

He shifted uncomfortably as Rinoa cleaned up the mishap on his face and dusted something on his cheeks. His legs felt weird, not only did they feel too smooth and look too shiny, but this was definitely the most skin he'd ever shown in his life (aside from when he'd gone swimming.)

Rinoa seemed to think she had been merciful in letting him continue to wear boxers, but the ones she bought for him were so short and restricting that they might as well have been women's underwear. And the short black denim skirt that had been forced onto him, with a dark blue sleeveless turtleneck-type top, made him feel almost naked.

"Why do I have to wear such a short skirt? And what's with this shirt?"

"Well, you do have a thin frame, and I think you should show off your nice body while you can," she said thoughtfully. "Besides, you have really pretty legs and shoulders. Your hips are kind of small, but this skirt'll take care of that."

She gave a reassuring pat to his hip and he flinched.

"Don't tell me any more. I don't want to know," he groaned, careful not to let his hands ruin his makeup again.

Rinoa chuckled and kissed his cheek, pulling him up.

"You're the best, Squall," she smiled brightly up at him. "Now let's get to school. Your shoes are over there."

He glanced at the direction she indicated and groaned. What the heck were those, and weren't they illegal in some nations?

"What are those? They look painful," he said.

"They're flip-flops, and they're not painful," Rinoa sighed, exasperated. "Just try them on. See, I'm wearing some too!" She wriggled her toes as Squall glanced at her feet, still suspicious.

He slipped them onto his feet and cringed. No arch support or anything. He bet if he stepped on an ant, he could feel it through the sole of these terribly uncomfortable pieces of garbage.

"They are painful," he said, glaring at her. She suddenly stopped her mouth and was staring at him with wide eyes.

"What?" he asked, glancing down to make sure nothing was...showing.

"Nothing, it's just..." Rinoa smiled again. "I guess I didn't realize how pretty you look now! Gosh, if I didn't know who you really are, I'd be totally jealous of you!"

"...You don't have to lie to make me feel better. I already feel like shit over this," he told her flatly. She giggled and shook her head.

"I'm not lying! You definitely won't be bullied now, but I'm just worried someone will try to rape you! You're hot enough to turn me lesbian, Squall!" Before he could reply, she skipped out the door. "Now, let's go!"

Squall only stared after her, shifting his weight on poorly sheltered feet. There really was nothing he could say to that, now, was there?