You Don't Hate Me

By

Lucibell

Chapter Eight

I didn't sleep well last night. Not after she left. Now I'm just sitting on the floor of my room, in meditation stance, nodding off while the candles flicker of their own accord. I can't even make myself concentrate, like I do when I'm angry or upset, which is usually all the time. I'm so tired and confused that I just sit here, dazed and nearly drooling all over myself. I hold back on the latter if only for my dignity's sake.

I was distressed last night, that much I'll admit. Hearing Katara tell me that she hated me had cut deep. Much deeper than anything I've ever heard before in my life. It scared me. And at first, I didn't know why. But now I do.

And now I know the real reason I joined the Avatar.

It wasn't so much that I was so sick of chasing the impossible or that I absolutely hated my father's wishes. It wasn't that I'd given up on my honor, my country, and my throne. It wasn't because I thought that I absolutely couldn't win. And it wasn't because I simply wanted to overthrow my father for my own greedy desire to rule.

It was because I was scared of losing her.

I don't even know where this fear came from. Probably the same place that the unexplainable flip-flops my stomach made whenever I saw her. Or the immense relief I felt when she finally woke up that day, after being unconscious for so long. Or the absolute bliss I felt when her lips were ever so gently caressing mine last night…

Like I said, I've no idea where it came from, so sue me. It's completely uncharacteristic and I hate it.

Yet, it reminds me so much of my mother and how I felt when I was with her. I loved her—love her—and miss that feeling so much that I suppose I'll do anything to get it back.

Even kiss a lowly Water Tribe peasant.

But in reality, I know that's not true. She's not just a peasant anymore. None of them are. Aang and I have actually become friends, a prospect that only seemed an offer after I rescued him from Zhao's clutches. But now the thought of being enemies with the kind, understanding young man is absolutely revolting.

And Sokka, her overprotective brother. I must admit that I admire him. I'd feel the same way about her if she was my own sister, no doubt. She's got everything going for her and I'd be scared someone would snatch her out from under my nose, too. I mean, think about it. She's smart, witty, independent, defiant, strong-willed, outspoken, talented, and gorgeous to boot.

Sokka was a lot less overprotective than I'd be, as a matter of fact…

I just hope he doesn't slaughter me, because I know that as sure as Uncle Iroh's favorite tea is ginseng—and trust me, I know this to be a definite fact—Katara will have already told her brother about everything that went on last night. And I fully expect that excellently crafted boomerang to come flying at my head as soon as I step foot on the deck.

That's why I haven't been on the deck at all today.

I feel my head droop a little farther than usual and I snap back into an erect kneeling position, taking a deep breath and widening my eyes, looking around as if expecting someone to be there. But to my not-so-surprise, nobody's there.

Now I just feel stupid.

Sighing extremely tiredly, I resign myself to standing woozily and staggering rather unsteadily out of my room and onto the accursed deck for much-needed fresh air.

I close my eyes tightly when I step out into the sunlight, listening intently for the sound of unnatural wind and feeling for the disturbance of the atmosphere around me. I feel nothing, and nothing slams itself unmercifully into my flesh, so I peek open my eyes.

And am faced with the starkest blue gaze ever. I almost heave a sigh of relief upon seeing Katara…

Until I realize that it's Sokka I'm looking at.

I suck that relief sigh right back up into my lungs and hold it there for dear life, feeling the pressure in my already woozy cranium grow.

"You kissed my sister." Well he's blunt. I wonder if that's something that runs in the family…

Hesitantly I nod, resisting the urge to duck for an unknown reason.

Okay, so I do know why, but he hasn't swung at me.

Yet.

I really need a nap…

I release said breath and feel my head rise to the clouds. My vision blurs for a second before coming back to focus on Sokka.

Who is now scowling at me.

I'm obviously safer than I thought.

"Okay, listen. I'm fixing to tell you something I'm sure you want to hear from her, but I've got something to say before this gets beyond something I can control." I feel my brow furrow as I decipher what he's saying. Slowly I nod. He continues. "My sister really cares about you, regardless of what she's said. She's a little confused right now, and by the looks of things," he pauses here for a second, giving me a critical look. If I was in my right mind, I'd shoot it right back at him. But I haven't slept in approximately twenty-something hours so I'm not really in my right mind. He finishes speaking. "By the looks of things, you're confused too.

"So I'm just going to say this and leave you guys alone. If you hurt my sister, physically, emotionally, or mentally, I'll throttle you, got it?"

I sigh that sigh of relief I'd been saving. I only got threatened, thank God. And it's that elder brother, hurt-her-and-I'll-kill-you threat, so it's all okay. I can deal with that. I'd never hurt Katara. Not intentionally, because we all know we can inadvertently hurt those we care about. But that doesn't matter. I'm thinking too much and I haven't slept. I'm just relieved he's not going to try and kill me.

I look him square in the eyes. "Thank you, Sokka. And I promise, I won't hurt her." I stand there for a moment longer, before smiling brightly and giddily whirling around where I stand, opening the hatch with a not-so-needed goofy flair, and hop down the stairs to my awaiting bed.

I can honestly say I get several strange looks in the hallway.

I'm probably going to regret that display of stupidity sometime in the near future, but as my head lands on the pillow and I snuggle into the blankets, I could really care less.

I wake up slowly, feeling a slight pounding on my head. I always knew giddiness was bad. It's like alcohol. It makes you act stupid and funny and then leaves you with a hangover in the morning.

But technically it wasn't morning.

Either way, I have a headache, and that's way not cool. Nor is it on my top ten list of things to wake up to after pleasant naps and dreams of Katara.

KATARA!

I sit upright much too fast and feel the effects immediately. I put a hand on my forehead and close my eyes tightly, hissing in pain. At that moment an ominous knock-knock-knocking sounds at my door. I moan, wanting to crawl back under the covers and die.

I think Uncle Iroh spiked this morning's tea.

"Come in," I moan croakily. Oh, great, now I sound like I've been singing much too loudly in the bath.

The door swings open and closes, though I don't actually see it. I've still got my head in my hands. I hear footsteps coming towards me and a weight fall on the bed as someone sits down beside me. I feel a warm hand on my head.

"Zuko, are you alright?" Katara's lulling voice floats to my ears and I feel the throbbing pain in my head lift the slightest bit. I look up at her and she slides her hand down my face, resting it under my jaw and tilting my head up too look at me squarely. "You're not sick are you? Open your mouth." I oblige and she peers inside, which seems kind of gross to me, but whatever floats her boat so long as mine stays afloat.

She tells me I can close my mouth and she moves her hand back up to my forehead and takes my wrist in her hand, pressuring two fingers on the inner pulse of my arm. "I have a headache," I say stupidly. I shrug mentally. She should know.

She nods, furrowing her brow in concern. "You have a fever, but I'm not sure what classifies as a fever amongst firebenders…" she waits for me to say something. I stay silent, feeling, for the first time, an immense pressure behind my eyes and nose. I sniffle a little, feeling a lot like a little kid again.

She smiles. "Then you've definitely got a cold. I knew I shouldn't have let you stand out on the deck yesterday. You were freezing and I didn't do anything about it."

"Katara, it wasn't—" She waves me off, pushing gently on my shoulders.

"Lie back down, I'm going to go get you some tea with honey. It'll make you feel better. Is your throat raw?" I think about it, then nod. That explains my croaking problem. I'm glad I didn't swallow a frog. That would've been embarrassing.

She nods somewhat knowingly and pulls the coverlet back over my now shivering form. As she tucks me in—which, as a matter of fact, I've not been tucked in since I was around seven—she leans down and brushes her lips across my forehead. I feel another shiver run down my spine that has nothing to do with the fever.

"I'll be back to take care of you soon. Rest." And with that, she leaves, her weight lifting from the bed and the ghost of her lips lingering on my skin. I smile, closing my eyes.

To take care of you…

I feel the pillow behind my head sink slightly as I relax more into it.

My sister really cares about you…

Well, Katara, I'm happy to say that I care about you, too.

Really.

Author's Note: EEE! I really like this chapter. Though, there's no interludes, so some of you may not like that, while others might. Oh, well, I don't care. It's a great chapter with a bit of humor. Zuko humor too! I'm so proud. And I'm so excited about posting this chapter and letting y'all read it and getting back to Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince that I'm just going to thank all of the reviewers in general and list your names here. I love you guys!

Lady Meko, starlightz1112, Katuko, Veronica, .CrimsonMysteryOfARose., AwakenDreams, LoneWolfLink, Monito, Boylessgirl52941, Zuko's-Gal07988, raven the black bender, Jess-chan of the Nya Nya Neko, Arwey, slychick25877, Outsane, lunaserenity, Zukos Girl, jerseygrl246, sweatpea333, Saucy Noodles.

Love y'all!

Luci