Sorry for being so long! I had exams, and then I got caught up in FOOTY FINALS FEAVER! GO THE SWANS! (If you're not Australian, you probably won't get that last bit. Get over it.)

I'm not doing any review responses anymore for 2 reasons a) I heard that doesn't allow them anymore and b) I'm getting so many reviews it's taking me 20 minutes to do them all! It's taking too long!

I still want to thank you all though! Especially that person who reviewed twice by accident! (I won't tell them so you don't get embarrassed!)

NOTE: Kaiba would like to just say that he hates everyone who was in the lynch mob, that he was scarred for life, and that you will all be hearing from his lawyers soon.

I would like to say that if he does (send his lawyers), he shall spend the rest of the fic in a dress, even if he's playing a male character.

Warning and Disclaimer: You know the drill, I don't know anything, people are in drag, etc, etc…

"Um, Erin…"

"What is it Bakura?"

Bakura looked at his feet. "I was so busy trying to kill Kaiba, and running Las Vegas, that I forgot to do the casting."

"You WHAT?"

"Don't make me kiss Yami!"

"No. I'm not that evil. But it does give me an idea… alrighty then," she then turned to everyone else, "I'll do the casting for the Little Mermaid. Ariel – Bakura,"

"Oh shit."

Erin continued on, "Ursula – Yami, King Triton – Marik, Prince Eric – Ryou, Grimsby – Joey, Adella – Serenity, Arista – Mai, Attina – Ishizu, Aquata – Kaiba, Adrina – Malik, Alana – Tea, Vanessa – Yami (Note: He plays two roles 'cause he's special.)." Erin finished. "Now get out of here! We have a show to do!"

The set today was: Stage left, King Triton's undersea realm, extreme Stage left, Ursula's cave, the middle was the ship, while Stage right was the castle.

Under the sea, King Triton was the ruler of all. He had seven wonderful daughters, Adella, Arista, Attina, Aquata, Adrina, Alana, and the youngest, Ariel. Now none could match Ariel when it came to singing, she had the most beautiful voice in the entire undersea realm.

All the mermaids came on, suspended from the ceiling by ropes a meter from the ground. They were wearing mermaid tails and their bras were made of…

"ARE THEY MY SUPPLY OF COCONUTS?" Erin screamed.

"Maybe…" Mai muttered.

"Great! Now I've got to get new coconuts!"

"Why don't you use those ones?" Mokuba asked.

"After they've been on their chests? As if!"

Bakura chose that moment to start singing, and just like his hikari, he was tone deaf.

"I really have to get these guys singing lessons!" Erin screamed.

But Ariel also had an unhealthy addiction with the world above the waves. She would dream about the day that she could be able to look above the sea.

Meanwhile all the undersea people were singing 'Under the sea' from the Disney version of The Little Mermaid. All very badly.

"Oh, Ra, save me from this unearthly torture!"

"Oh, Erin, just get over it!"

"Shut up, Mokuba."

Then, on Ariel's sixteenth birthday, (why sixteen?), like all her sisters before her, she got to spend one night above the sea.

Meanwhile, Eric, prince of somewhere or other, was also having a birthday celebration, on his boat.

"w00t! Party!" Ryou yelled from the boat, in his prince costume.

"Whatever." Joey, in servant dress, then proceeded to be 'seasick', i.e. trying to hit the merpeople (Mainly Kaiba) with his fake vomit.

Bakura then popped up. "Do I really have to say this? I feel like a homo!"

"Well, Bakura, technically, you're a girl now, so it doesn't matter." Erin replied.

"He is so hot!" Bakura said sarcastically.

"Thank you. Now you will not die a painful death."

"But I'm already dead."

"SHUT UP! You know what I mean!"

Just then, because God or Ra, or whatever you want to call him, was in a bad mood, a storm blew up. And Prince Eric's ship was wrecked. Ariel managed to save him and bring him to shore.

"What the hell…?" Ryou stammered, after Bakura managed to carry him to shore.

"See ya later, sexy!" Bakura hopped back in the ocean.

"Oh my God, she was really HOT!"

"I really need to think about my choice of words." Erin muttered, head in hands.

Ariel was, of course, now head over tailfin for Prince Eric. But she would probably never see him again due to whole 'He's human, She's a mermaid' thing. But when has that ever gotten in the way of love?

Quite often actually. I read on the internet that sailors used to throw themselves over the sides of boats to be with the 'mermaids' they saw under the sea but usually…

"SHUT UP AND GET ON WITH IT, YOU FREAK!" Yes, Bakura was pissed off.

Alright, alright. Keep your tail on. So, Ariel just happened to be swimming by the cave of the evil, ugly, homicidal, sadistic, narcissist…

"Are you trying to make me feel bad or something?" Yami asked.

"Now come on, Yami, they are all very good qualities. Unfortunately you posses none of them." Bakura replied.

Anyway she was this big half squid thing and her name was Ursula. She wanted to take over the world and she wanted Ariel's pretty voice as well.

"Well, my dear," Yami said, wearing a tail section that was crazier than his hair, (if that's even possible), "You want to become human?"

"Yes!"

"Well, all you have to do is give me your soul, I mean voice."

"Anything else?"

"You will only get your soul, I mean voice if Prince Eric kisses you."

"How'd you know about Eric?"

"My dear I know all."

"Really? Then what was in your lunch today?"

"Ham?"

"NO! Human!"

"Bakura!" Erin yelled, "Did you really put human flesh in that Pea and Ham soup?"

"Yep!" he replied, obviously proud of himself.

"YOU IDIOT! I ATE THAT! Who was it by the way?"

"That's for me to know and for you to find out."

"Ewww…" muttered everyone who had eaten Bakura's soup.

"I think we should leave it there and continue on with the story." Mokuba noted.

I think you're right. So anyway Ursula took Ariel's voice, turned her tailfins to legs, and dumped her on the beach. She also sent giant man eating crab after the girl as punishment for spiking the soup.

Said crab came on to stage and started chasing Bakura, who was now wearing a white dress. "Holy mother of…"

"Okay," Erin said, extremely confused, "I was joking about the crab."

"I wasn't." replied Yami.

"I'm not even going to ask…" the authoress muttered.

Thankfully for everyone, Joey came on stage, so Yami had to banish the giant crab so it didn't kill his friend.

"Excuse me, miss, but who are you?" Joey asked.

"I'm Bakura! All powerful and mighty thief king of the world!"

A random sandbag came down and hit Bakura on the head. "You idiot!" Erin yelled, "You can't talk! Your voice was taken!"

"Oh, yeah…"

"SHUT UP!"

Grimsby took the now human Ariel to the palace. Prince Eric took the girl in and treated her like his own sister, while he harbored this fascination with the girl that had saved him in that storm.

Of course, Ariel knew that she was that girl, but she couldn't tell him due to the whole 'can't talk because Ursula has my voice' thing.

Any way a year (I think) later…

"Ariel! I have great news! I'm getting married!" Ryou yelled.

Bakura looked at Ryou in shock.

"To the girl that I told you about."

The only way to describe Bakura's face is this: ((O.O))

In case you're wondering, this is not the sappy Disney version of the Little Mermaid, its Han Christen Anderson's, modified just a tad. And this version has a different ending.

In fact the 'mermaid' was Ursula, trying to get with Eric, 'cause she decided he was hot.

Yami then came on looking exactly like Bakura, which could only be achieved using Erin's (not so) mighty authoress powers.

"I met her in a far away land, when I was on that cruise, and when I met Princess Vanessa (note: I stole the name from the Disney version. So sue me.), and when I saw her, I knew it was the same girl."

'Vanessa' and Eric got married the next week on a yacht. Ariel was there too. She looked over the bow of the boat, and saw her sisters in the ocean. Right then she regretted all she had done, and jumped off the boat to join her sisters in the sea.

But, because now she was human, she couldn't breathe underwater, and she died. Because of her (cough) innocence (cough) she was made into a spirit of the air.

And Eric realized that 'Vanessa' was a fake. So everyone lived unhappily ever after.

The End (finally).

"Erin?" Yami asked, "Can you change me back now?"

"But you look so cute!" Erin said sarcastically.

"Finally, one to mold in my own image!" Bakura said very evilly.

"Please?" Yami pleaded.

"Maybe later." Erin said, smirking.

FINAL NOTE: I'm looking for a beta reader! If anyone wants the job, they can email me. (The address is on my profile). If anyone wants me to be their beta reader you can also email me. I'll be happy to do it!