A/N: First I want to explain something about the last chapter. I understand that not every baby will have problems when it's born at 34 weeks, and some of them, like your daughter, can go home almost immediately. But others will be to small to go home and have to stay in an incubator for days or even weeks. In this story, Lorelai's baby wasn't ready to get born because it was to small. So it was better to give her medicine to stop the contractions and delay the delivery with a few weeks.
Second, sorry it took me so long to update. Last week was very busy. I had spring break, but instead of having more time, I ended up having less. I worked a lot, and add physics homework to that and you know exactly what I've been doing the entire week. So I took my laptop with me on the train so I could finally write it. And here it is. Hope you like it, and if you do, please review ;)
Third, I want to thank LorelaiAkaCoffeeAddict for proofreading! You're the best!
Chapter 22 Going home
The next day Dr. Elder removed the IV from Lorelai. She kept her in the hospital for another day for observation, just to see if there wouldn't be any more contractions. Luckily they weren't so Luke was able to take Lorelai home the next day.
Luke had staid with her the entire time. Lorelai told him to go home in between, but he refused each time she mentioned it. There was no way he could go home without her. He knew the place would be too silent and the walls would attack him within a few minutes. He hated it when he had to take a bathroom break. And she had to force him to go have something to eat in the cafeteria. The only way she could make him go was to tell him that she was hungry and he had to go and get her something to eat. Even hospital food. Of course, when he smelled food he felt his own stomach growl so he got himself something as well, but he took it with him so he could eat it together with Lorelai.
Lorelai woke up before the sun came up the next day, eager to go home. Even Luke wasn't awake yet. She turned around to look at him, carefully not to wake him. She loved to watch him sleep, fantasize about what he would be like with their baby. The look on his face when he would first hold their baby. She could watch him forever and do that. She spent countless nights doing that. No matter what, she knew Luke would be a great father. She knew he doubted that sometimes himself, but then again, she had doubts about being a good mother herself. She knew things are a lot different then when she got Rory. She was a kid, innocent and not realizing what could go wrong. Now she knew. She grew up together with Rory. She was afraid that now she couldn't be the cool mom she was with Rory. She never really told Luke about her doubts though. He was insecure enough himself and she didn't want him having to deal with her insecurities as well.
Even though she was getting tired of being pregnant (the large stomach, not being able to wear normal clothing, having trouble putting on some socks and tying shoelaces), she was glad the baby wasn't born yet. She needed more time to prepare herself. She had been so scared something would be wrong with the baby, and she would never have been able to forgive herself if something had went wrong. She knew that it wouldn't be a bad thing for the baby to be born now, although a few extra weeks would be better. The baby is still small, smaller than average. She blamed herself for that as well, although Dr. Elder had told her repeatedly that it wasn't something to be worried about. Some babies are big when they get born, others are small, like hers…
"Hey." Luke slowly opened his eyes. "What are you thinking about?"
"How happy I am that I can go home." She smiled and lifted her head so she could kiss him. "Good morning."
"Good morning. How come you're awake so early?"
"Don't know. I just couldn't go back to sleep and I found myself once more wondering what our child would be like. How good a father you would be and…"
"What?" He brushed a few hairs out of her face.
"And if raising this child will be any different from raising Rory."
"I think every child is different, so raising a different child would be different, but than again, maybe not so different, why?"
"I'm different now. When I had Rory I was this cool mom and… well…. it's just that you're not the only one having doubts about their parental abilities."
"Lorelai, you told me that you have no doubts in me being a good father, and I have absolutely no doubts in you being a good mother. You did a great job raising Rory and you will do a great job raising our baby."
"In a way I know that, there are just those times when I have to much time to think, when I start having doubts."
"There is no reason for that, you're a great mother."
"Thanks."
He kissed her. "So, you slept well, other than being awake early?"
"Yeah, I always sleep well when I'm in your arms. The benefit of a small bed." She smiled.
"And you made me buy a bigger one."
"No, you bought it yourself. I just, well, you know exactly what I told you."
"Yeah I do." He smiled at the memory. "So, are you ready to go home?"
"More than I'll ever be. How long do we have to wait before we can go home?"
"I don't know. The doctor said she would come in early to check up on you and if everything was okay, all we have to do before we can go home is sign the release forms."
"I like the sound of that. Going home."
"So do I."
He closed his eyes for a while before Lorelai asked "Luke?"
"Mmm…"
"I love you."
"I love you, too." He kissed her again. "Go back to sleep, it's too early to be awake."
"But I don't know if I can."
"Just try." He closed his eyes again. Lorelai did the same, and she realized how tired she was. It didn't take long before they both were asleep again, safe in each other's arms.
Luke was the one who woke up when a nurse walked into the room, at 8 o' clock.
"Morning sir." The nurse walked towards the windows and opened the curtains.
"Good morning."
"Have you slept well?"
"Yes thank you."
"She's still sleeping."
"Yeah, she's exhausted, but I'm sure she will wake up soon."
"Good, Dr. Elder started her rounds already, and she must be here within 10 minutes."
"Thanks." The nurse left.
Luke kissed Lorelai's forehead. "Lorelai, wake up."
"No, too early." She refused to open her eyes.
"Dr. Elder will be here within a few minutes and you can go home after that."
As Luke had expected, that did it. She opened her eyes immediately. She sat up, but felt dizzy because it was to fast and let herself fall back into the pillow. "Ugh."
"You okay?"
"Yeah, just got up to fast."
"Are you sure?" the worry was evident in his voice.
"Luke, don't worry, I'm fine, I promise."
Luke kissed Lorelai again before he stepped out of the bed. He put his shoes back on, and pulled a clean shirt out of Lorelai's closet, which Sookie had brought them the day before. She came to visit and took some clothes in for both Luke and Lorelai to change. She was very worried but Lorelai had assured her friends that both she and the baby were okay. In the end Luke sent Sookie away because she was too energetic, and Lorelai was tired.
Richard and Emily had visited early in the evening. Emily had tried hard not to blame anything on Lorelai, knowing her daughter was worried enough herself. Of course, in her mind she blamed her daughters overdoing, but for once, she kept the thought to herself. Lorelai knew exactly what her mother was thinking, as it was written all over her face, but she appreciated how hard her mother tried. They hadn't stayed long, seeing the tiredness in Lorelai's eyes.
Luke took a toothbrush out of the plastic back, and used the sink in Lorelai's room to brush his teeth. He also noticed a raiser in the back, but left it there. When he looked in the mirror he could see Lorelai's attempt to get up again. Slower this time, she pushed herself up. It worked, because she didn't felt dizzy this time.
Dr. Elder, followed by a few med students, walked into the room by the time Luke was finished.
"Good morning Lorelai, Luke. How are you feeling today?"
"Good, ready to go home." Lorelai smiled.
"Let's do some tests to confirm that." Dr. Elder smiled back.
She took the Doppler to listen to the baby's heartbeat. "The heartbeat sounds good." She touched Lorelai's abdomen to feel the baby's position, and did another pelvic to see if there was any dilation, which there wasn't. She had one of the med students check Lorelai's blood pressure. And did another few tests, writing the results down on her chart.
After she finished the tests she told Lorelai the results. "Everything looks good. There are no more contractions and there is no dilation. As we talked about before, you're baby is small and it's better to keep him or her inside you for a few more weeks. You can't go back to work until after the baby is born. Further, you can go up and down the stairs only 1 time a day, so you can go downstairs in the morning, and back up in the evening. And it would be even better if you don't walk the stairs at all, but I'm doubting that it's possible to keep you in bed for 6 weeks."
"I'll try." Lorelai said, but knowing Dr. Elder was right.
"The first 2 weeks you're grounded. All you can do is read a book, watch some TV, nothing else. The only time you can leave your house is next Thursday, because you have an appointment with me. But other than that, you're staying at home. I know this will be tough, but it is the best for you and the baby. And once the baby is born, you'll forget about it again."
Lorelai nodded.
"I'll have the release papers ready at the nurse station. You can get dressed pack your stuff and go home, and I'll see you next Thursday. If there is anything else, you can always call me." Dr. Elder picked a card out of her pocket. "This is my pager number if there's anything wrong. Don't hesitate to call, because the only thing that is important, is that you are okay."
"Thank you." Lorelai shook Dr. Elder's hand.
"Yes, thank you for everything." Luke followed Lorelai's example. It was the first time he spoke since Dr. Elder had entered the room. He had watched everything from Lorelai's side, but couldn't help the fact that he felt more than uncomfortable. Being in a hospital environment made him feel that way. Dr. Elder alone he could handle, and a nurse walking into a room once in a while was okay, but all the med students with their lab coats made the place seem very sterile and uncomfortable for him.
Lorelai noticed this and took his hand in hers, squeezing it. He looked up at her and gave her an uncomfortable smile, wanting to thank her. She watched the doctor and the students leave and as soon as they closed the door behind her, she asked "Can you pick me out some clothes, I would love to go home now."
Still a little distracted Luke stood up and did what she had asked.
Half an hour later they were walking hand in hand towards the parking lot. It took them a while before they remembered where they had parked the truck, but after that things went faster. Luke helped Lorelai into the truck, and walked around the truck to get in himself. They drove home in silence, both lost in their thoughts in how different things could have gone.
Lorelai stared out the window, but didn't really look at anything. Luke's eyes were focused on the road. He drove carefully again. Most cars passed them. If Lorelai had noticed it, she wouldn't have cared. In a way she was scarred to go home, not because of the silence and the fact that she was grounded, but because of the town. She didn't felt like explaining anything anymore. Sookie, her parents and of course Rory was enough. She wished she didn't have to deal with anyone else. She knew Luke felt the same way. He hated to be in the center of attention. Normally she didn't, but at the moment she just didn't want to walk to anybody. Though, she knew the moment they would park the truck on the driveway, a nosy Babette would storm out, lurching for information.
When Luke was about to turn into the exit towards their town, Lorelai first spoke. "I wish we could just drive around for a while."
"Why?" He gave her a quick look.
"It's just… the town you know."
"Yeah." He sighed.
"Babette will storm out of her house, even before you stopped the engine."
"I know. But what do you want to do? You know that you have to take it easy, and driving bumpy roads can't be good."
"I know. I just… I wish we could sneak in during the night, hide the truck and make them think we're missing or something."
"I think we're lucky they didn't follow us towards the hospital. Non of them showed up."
"Well, maybe they don't know?"
"Lorelai, we were in the diner. Of course they know."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Can't you take me to the diner? There is still some furniture in your old apartment and then you can take me home in the middle of the night, when everybody in town is sleeping."
"Caesar opened the diner this morning, so a lot of those nosy town people will be there, that will be even worse than just Babette."
"Oh, never thought of that."
About 5 minutes later Luke parked the truck on their driveway, and as suspected Babette showed up in no time.
"Sugar, are you okay?"
Lorelai helped herself out of the truck before answering. "I'm fine Babette. Just a false alarm. The baby changed it's mind and wants to stay inside of me for a few more weeks. But if you're alright with it, I would love to get inside and get some sleep. I'm really exhausted."
"Morey, Lorelai's home and she's okay. The baby won't come in a while" she screamed towards her husband, than she turned back to Lorelai. "Well, you worked so hard the last few weeks, and the wedding…"
"Don't worry. I'm officially on maternity leave now."
"Good thing sugar. Well, you go in and get some rest and keep a good eye on that man of yours because he looks pretty tired himself. I'm going to give Patty a call, because she's dying to know how you're doing."
"Okay, see you later Babette."
"Bye, sugar." And towards her husband. "Morey, I'm coming back home now, Lorelai's going to rest and we have to call Patty."
Lorelai smiled when she watched her neighbor running home. She turned towards her own house and noticed Luke was already inside. She followed him and locked the door behind her. Normally she never locked her doors, but this was her best change in leaving everybody else outside.
She let herself fall down on the couch, and realized she had no idea where Luke was. "Luke?"
No reply, so she yelled a little louder. "Luke?" She stood up, to look for him. She couldn't find him anywhere downstairs so she slowly climbed the stairs, even though she was allowed to do it only once. She checked the bathroom and their bedroom, but he wasn't there. "Luke?" The last room she checked was the nursery and their he was, sitting in the rocking chair.
"Luke?"
He looked up. "What are you doing upstairs?"
"I can ask you the same thing, what are you doing here?"
He lifted his shoulders. He didn't really wanted to explain.
She walked closer to him and placed one of her hand on his shoulder. "Hon?"
"I just…. I always thought that the day we would go to the hospital we would come home with the baby."
"We did right?"
"You know that's not what I mean."
"It's better this way. The baby needs some more time to grow, but the next time, I think it will be three of us, you just have to wait a few more weeks."
"I know that, it's just…."
"It's not what you expected." She carefully prompted.
"Yeah." He admitted shyly.
She moved her hand from his shoulder to his hand and pulled him up. "Let's go back downstairs."
"No, you're not going back downstairs."
"Why not?"
"You know what the doctor told you. You can only go up and down the stairs once a day."
"Exactly, so I can go back downstairs."
"But you can't go back up, and I'm not sleeping in Rory's room, so you have to stay."
"But I'll be bored to death."
"No, you won't. We have almost everything we have downstairs up here as well. There is a TV in our bedroom. And if you want a book or magazines or whatever, just ask me, I'll get them for you." They had moved one of his TV's into the bedroom, just like they had there. So, if he had to go to bed early because he had early deliveries, they could still go to bed at the same time.
"Okay, fine." Lorelai wasn't in the mood to protest. She was pretty tired anyway, and the thought of laying in bed and get some sleep, didn't sound so bad after all.
Lorelai changed her clothes before she stepped into the bed. Luke himself went into the bathroom to take a shower. Let the hot water wash away the tension.
Luke walked into the bedroom 15 minutes later. Lorelai was lying on her side, reading a magazine.
"Hey."
She looked up "Hey, you clean again?"
"Yeah well.." He walked towards the closet and took out a pair of jeans and a clean shirt and put them on. Lorelai continued to watch him.
"Whatcha looking at?"
"The beautiful body of my husband."
Luke smiled shyly. "You're not looking that bad yourself."
"Oh come on, have you looked at me lately? I'm fat and my ankles are swollen and my face looks like I haven't slept in a month…."
"No way." He walked towards her and sat down on the bed, turning her face so she had to look him in the eye. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."
"But I'm fat."
"No you're not, and you will never be. You look beautiful Lorelai, and to me, you will always be beautiful."
"To you, so that means I'm not really, you just won't see the truth."
"Lorelai." He sighed, but had no idea how to make clear what he intended, so he just kissed her. When he pulled away he looked her in the eyes again and once more stated "You are beautiful."
"Hey Hon, are you going to the diner today?"
"I was thinking about staying with you."
"But I think Caesar disserves a break. He's been working long days for the past few weeks. First our wedding, and now this."
"Maybe you're right, but I'd rather stay with you, to keep an eye on you, you know."
"I know, but I'm going to sleep most of the time anyways, and after that I'll watch some movies, and I have to give Rory a call…"
"I could watch you sleep, and watch the movies with you."
"You don't even like Willy Wonka. I'd rather have you take some time off after the baby is born, I need you then. You just have to own some credit by your employees so they are willing to take over for you."
"If not, I'll just close the diner."
"We don't want that. Besides, after 2 days of hospital food I could use some real food. So I'd like for you to make me some at the diner."
"I can make it for you here."
"I think we had this conversation before. It won't be the same."
He remembered the morning where she made him pack up the food and eat it at the diner. "You're right. I better go. But you have to promise me you stay in bed, and if there is anything, you have to call me."
"I promise." She kissed him. "Now go, scoot."
Luke smiled as he stood up and walked away.
That evening he came home around 7. He had closed the diner early, so everyone could have a nice quiet evening at home. He knew Lorelai would be starved by now, and he couldn't ask the others to stay and close. They offered though, but Lorelai was right, he had to own some credit.
He took two plates from the cabinet, a bottle of beer and a bottle of water from the fridge and walked upstairs. Lorelai was laying in bed, watching TV. She looked up as she heard him enter the room. "Hey Luke, how was your day. Oh, that smells good, I'm really starving. What did you bring me? You brought me coffee? Please tell me you did."
"Hey. My day was fine, busy. I made a lot of money because all the town people came by to ask how you were doing, and they all stayed to have something to eat or drink. I brought you a burger, fries, and pie for desert. And no coffee, sorry."
"But…" He silenced her with a kiss.
They ate together, and after that they watched some TV together. Lorelai lay comfortable in Luke's arms. After the movie was over, Luke noticed Lorelai had fallen asleep. He used the remote to turn of the TV and carefully lowered them further down on the bed, so now he was laying on his back, with her snuggled to his side and his arms securely around her. He brushed away a few hairs from her face and kissed her forehead. "Goodnight Lorelai." He whispered. He reached to turn of the light. When the room was compete dark he closed his eyes, only to open them again a few seconds later. He kissed Lorelai's forehead again and whispered "I love you." Than, he moved his hand to her abdomen and let it rest there. "I love you, too."